


Fading Bright Eyes Dark

by LexaRexa



Series: Fading Bright Eyes Dark [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blow Jobs, Consensual Underage Sex, Cunnilingus, Eventual Smut, F/F, G!P, Girl Penis Lexa, HSAU, Homophobia, Horny Klutzy Clarke TM, Intersex, Loss of Virginity, Masturbation, Nerd Clarke, Oral Sex, Protective!Raven - Freeform, Ranya is a thing in this story, Sassy Raven, Sex without a Condom, Sexting, Smut, Strangers to Lovers, Thirsty!clarke, Transphobia, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Young Love, awkward cinnamon roll lexa, descriptions of past sexual assult, klutz!clarke, lots of fluff, minimal angst, ranya is precious, slowish burn, soccer player lexa, these horny motherfuckers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-04
Updated: 2017-07-21
Packaged: 2018-11-09 03:07:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 25
Words: 98,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11095599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LexaRexa/pseuds/LexaRexa
Summary: Clarke isn't happy about being partnered with a complete stranger when her 4.2 GPA is at stake, but she does her best to make the most of it because, well, what other choice does she have? What she didn't expect was the intense curiosity and instant attraction that she felt for this new girl...Lexa is the new girl and is partnered up with Clarke for a writing assignment on her first day at her new school. She's not here to make friends, but there's something about Clarke and her misfit group of friends that makes her feel comfortable to be herself. But if her dark past has taught her anything, it's that she can't trust anyone, not even the pretty blue eyed blonde who keeps invading her every waking thought.





	1. The Arts vs. Athletics

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there! Thank you for clicking on this fic. I hope you enjoy. 
> 
> A note before you read: I live in Clark County, Nevada and I work for the Clark County government, so my first instinct is to use "Clark" instead of "Clarke." I hope I managed to catch and correct this each time, but I apologize if one or two escaped my attention. 
> 
> Please let me know what you think, and enjoy! :)

Clarke sniffled, trying to be discrete as she pulled her notebook out of her bag. It was first period on Monday morning and her head was killing her, but she still felt better than last Friday. She’d wanted to go to school--she had a 4.2 GPA to protect!--but her mother had taken one look at her and ordered her straight back to bed where she’d stayed for most of the weekend.

She still felt like crap, but she could at least function once again.

“Alright, everyone, calm down,” their teacher, Mr. Mendez, said after the tardy bell rang. Clarke looked up, taking note of an unfamiliar face standing nervously by the door. From the front row,  
Clarke had an up-close view of the girl. She was tall and slender, but her well-muscled arms, left bare by her fitted black tank top, suggested an athletic side, as did the fact that her long, curly hair was neatly gathered into a French braid that she’d pulled over one shoulder.

“We have a new student,” Mr. Mendez continued when everyone had quieted down. He gestured towards the girl. “This is Alexandria Woods, whose family has just moved here from the Washington, D.C. area. Please welcome her and help her with class procedures.” He turned to Lexa. “We started a partner project last Friday, so I will have to create a trio, I think. Don’t worry if you feel a bit behind. I’ll take that into consideration for your part of the grade on this project.”

 _Crap_ , Clarke thought to herself. Partner project? Last Friday? She glanced around and noted that all of her other classmates were already in pairs. Groaning inwardly, Clarke raised her hand. “Mr. Mendez?” she said, wincing at the way her voice sounded.

“Yes, Miss Griffin?”

“I was out sick on Friday,” she explained. “So I don’t have a partner.”

Mr. Mendez clapped his hands together. “Perfect!” he said. “Miss Woods, you can partner with Clarke here. She is one of my top students and I saw from your transcripts that you were doing quite well in your old school. I have no doubt that you two will be able to quickly catch up by working together. You have through Wednesday to complete the paper and organize a short 5 to 7 minute presentation, which will be given Thursday and Friday. I will allow you two to go on Friday since you did not get the weekend to work on your outline.”

The girl nodded and moved to take the empty seat next to Clarke, who gave her a small nod as Mr. Mendez went on to review the basics of the paper with the entire class. They were to research a question that they were assigned and write a persuasive essay together. It sounded simple enough to Clarke--her first thought was that they’d each write half the paper and then piece it together--and then Mr. Mendez reminded them not to do just that. Clarke  
looked over at her partner and noticed her furrowed brow. Clarke assumed she’d had the same train of thought.

Damn. This was going to be awkward. Clarke wasn’t the best when it came to meeting new people. And she was sick on top of everything. Great. She held back a groan.

Once they’d been instructed to continue working, Mr. Mendez handed Clarke an envelope and said that their prompt was inside as well as a rubric for the requirements, length, and format of the paper. “Let me know if you ladies have any questions,” he said.

Clarke nodded and he left to circulate the room. She glanced over to the girl and stood to turn her desk to face her. The girl did the same so that they were facing one another.

Clarke’s body chose that moment to go into a coughing fit. She covered her mouth and dug into her backpack for her water, taking a few gulps in an effort to calm her itchy throat.

“Are you okay?” her partner asked, looking concerned.

Clarke nodded. “I’ll be fine,” she said, taking another drink and setting her water bottle on her desk in case another coughing fit arose. “Just a nasty cold. What was your name again?”

“Alexandria,” the girl said. “But I go by Lexa."

Clarke made a mental note of that. “Okay. I’m Clarke.”

Lexa nodded. “I know. What’s in our envelope?”

Clarke opened the envelope and read the prompt out loud. “Your local school board is considering eliminating fine arts elective subjects such as art, band, and ceramics in order to raise money for the athletics program in our schools in an effort to get more students active. What is your position on this issue? Write a letter to the school board stating your position and supporting it with convincing reasons. Be sure to explain your reasons in detail.”

She refolded the paper and glanced up at her partner. “Well, that’s the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard,” she said, rolling her eyes.

Lexa furrowed her brow. “Why? Sports are important.”

Clarke raised a single eyebrow. “Well, sure, but so are the arts programs,” she said, already feeling herself growing defensive.

Lexa shrugged. “There’s more benefit to students for athletics, though. They get exercise and become team players. Not to mention the amount of scholarship money that’s available for college.”

Clarke blinked in surprise. Okay, not so easy then. She shook her head in dismay and sighed. “So, you’re one of those egotistical jocks who think people in art and band are inferior and don’t deserve funding so that you get your precious balls to play with?”

“What? No, that’s not what I said,” Lexa argued. “I simply said that there’s more opportunities in athletics than the arts. Also, studies show that participation in sports leads to higher performance in school.”

Clarke rolled her eyes, cursing when the action caused her head to pound harder. “Not everyone is athletic,” Clarke countered. “Not everyone in interested in playing a sport. But yet you want to  
take away their outlets. Their passions.”

Lexa shook her head. “I didn’t mean it like that.” She looked Clarke squarely in the eye, her green irises catching the light. “I take it you’re interested in fine arts?”

Clarke nodded. “I’m an artist. I’m only coordinated with a canvass. I don’t have any interest in playing a sport, so if fine arts is defunded in order to give even more money to dumb jocks, who are already getting the majority of the budget, I and a lot of other students will be disadvantaged.”

“But other students would be disadvantaged if they don’t have access to sports. If the sports program is underfunded, they won’t have access to college scholarships. The only way I’m going to college is if I get an athletic scholarship.”

“Sports are already funded, though,” Clarke countered. “You aren’t going to find a gym not full of sporting equipment, but if you search the fine arts rooms, you’ll see that everything is lacking. Art supplies are always low. I have to bring my own. The school’s band and orchestra instruments are old and falling apart. Most students have to rent or buy their own. Do the jocks have to buy their own soccer balls or basketball hoops?”

Lexa was silent for a moment, looking thoughtful. “Okay,” she said after a few minutes.

“Okay?” Clarke repeated, confused. What was happening?

Lexa shrugged. “I agree with you. I did from the start. I was just playing devil’s advocate because it is important to bring up and discuss the opposition in a persuasive argument, but this shows  
that your side of our argument was a lot stronger. I am a bit offended that you think all jocks are dumb, but it is nice to see someone so passionate about the arts.”

Clarke stared, mouth agape, for several seconds before blinking several times and, finally, feeling herself calm down. “That was…” she trailed off and shook her head. “You’re an interesting girl, Lexa. And I think we’re going to get along just fine.” She finally broke out into a wide smile.

Lexa smiled back, though Clarke noted that it seemed tinged with sadness. It didn’t quite reach her eyes. Clarke wondered in that moment what the brunette’s story was. She was looking around, taking note that everyone else seemed to already have an outline completed and were working on the rough draft of their paper.

Clarke also took note of this and considered their options. “Since we can’t just write our own portions and combine them, we’re going to have to work on this outside of class,” she said.

“Yeah,” Lexa said, looking down at her hands folded on her desk. “I don’t really know the area all that well, so if you have any suggestions, I’m open to them. I don’t have any transportation, though. I don’t have a car and my mom works pretty late.”

“I do,” Clarke said. “Have a car, I mean. As for where, we can go to my house. My mom is always working, so we’ll have the house to ourselves pretty much. I can drive you home afterwards.”

Lexa nodded. “Okay, sure. What day?”

Clarke considered for a moment. “Not today,” she said, sniffling again. “I’m still sick and will probably go right to sleep when I get home. Tomorrow? We can order a pizza or something to fuel us.”

Lexa shrugged. “Sure.” Clarke tried not to be a bit hurt that Lexa didn’t seem thrilled to have to spend extra time with her, but she scolded herself. They’d just met, after all.

“What’s your class schedule?” Clarke asked, wondering if they shared any other classes. Clarke’s schedule was full of AP and honors classes in addition to her art class, but it seemed like Lexa  
had some brains as well.

“Oh, um,” Lexa said, digging around in her messenger bag a bit before pulling out a bright green paper with her class schedule printed on it. “Here,” she said, handing the paper to Clarke.

Clarke glanced over the paper. “You have five AP classes?” Clarke said, eyes widening in surprise. The girl’s only non-AP classes were P.E. and their current class, which was an elective non-fiction writing class.

Lexa shrugged. “I lived in Quebec for five years before we moved to D.C., so the AP French isn’t all that impressive.”

Clarke raised an eyebrow. “But AP Stats _and_ AP Calc? As a Junior?” Clarke wasn’t even going to be taking AP Calculus until her senior year.

Lexa grinned. “I like math,” she said, snatching her schedule from Clarke.

Clarke scoffed. “Show off,” she muttered. But she grinned to show Lexa that she was teasing. “Well, at least you’ll know someone in AP Lit. We’re about to start the poetry unit. And we have the same P.E. class. Coach Gills is a hardass, but you’ll probably fly through if you’re as athletic as you let on. You play soccer, then?”

Lexa’s head reeled from all the words coming from the blonde’s mouth. She’d intended to lay low the first few days at her new school. She wasn’t here to make friends or socialize. She had Anya for that. Sure, Anya was her older sister who was in her first year of college, but she still came home nearly every weekend. They’d fought a lot when they were younger, typical sibling stuff, but they’d grown closer over that last several years. Anya was incredibly protective of Lexa, and it was giving her even more anxiety that she wasn’t there to ward off potential bullies. But she had to get used to not having the intimidating presence of Anya everywhere she went. She had to learn how to protect herself and she had to learn fast.

Lexa suddenly realized that Clarke had asked her a question. What was it? Oh, right. Sports. “Oh, um, yeah. And cross country.”

“Long distance running, gross,” Clarke said, scrunching up her face. “I’ll stick to art.”

“We should start the outline,” Lexa said, interrupting Clarke.

Clarke blinked, suddenly remembering that they were in class and gave Lexa a sheepish look. “Right. Funding for arts is good.” She opened her notebook to a blank page and they got to work, only arguing once when Clarke called sports ‘archaic and barbaric’, which she only did to get back at Lexa for pretending to be anti-arts.

As Lexa started their introduction paragraph, Clarke studied the brunette. Lexa was so intently focused on the task at hand, and Clarke wondered if that was normal for the girl. Something told her it was, and she wondered if she’d ever break through that tough outer shell. She wasn’t sure why, but she suddenly had a burning desire to understand more about Lexa, to get to know her on a deeper level and find out what made her tick.

  

***

 

“Hot new girl in my AP Stats class,” Raven casually said as she placed her lunch tray on the table with a loud clang. “Kinda quiet in a broody kind of way, though.” Raven sat facing Clarke, straddling the bench-type seat. They were at their usual table in the courtyard outside, where they sat when it wasn’t too hot, too cold, or raining.

Clarke hummed in response, know exactly who Raven was referring to. “Keep it in your pants, Reyes,” Clarke said. “And she’s in my writing class, too. We’re working on an argumentative essay together.” 

Raven narrowed her eyes at Clarke. “How did you know who I was talking about?” she asked, suspicious.

“New girl, broody, and I saw her class schedule,” Clarke explained. “Not hard to figure out.”

“You forgot hot,” Raven said.

“Who’s hot?” Octavia asked as she joined them, her boyfriend, Lincoln, not far behind. They settled at the table.

“New girl,” Raven supplied. “Clarke’s got a crush on her.”

“I do not!” Clarke protested. “If anyone does, it’s you, Rae. You’re the one who can’t shut up about how hot she is.”

Raven scoffed and was about to say something when something caught her eye and a devious look crossed her face. “Let’s test that theory, shall we?” She stood and waved at someone across the room. “Hey, new girl! Over here! We have a theory we want to test!”

Clarke turned to look behind her and noticed Lexa looking uncomfortable as she searched for a place to sit. She looked to be considering Raven’s command. Clarke rolled her eyes at Raven. “She has a name,” she said. She tracked Lexa as she cautiously made her way towards their table. When she was close enough, Clarke spoke before Raven could. “Sorry about my friend here,” she said. “She was raised by wolves. You’re more than welcome to join us and _Raven_ here--” she glared at the girl in question--“will promise to behave.”

“Good luck with that,” Octavia chimed in. Raven kicked her under the table.

“Um, thanks,” Lexa said, placing her tray gently on the table right next to Clarke, which was the furthest away from Raven.

Clarke gave Raven a smug look. “I was a the new kid a few years back. I know how it is.” She turned to indicate the others at the table. “This is Octavia and her boyfriend, Lincoln. And you already know Raven.”

“You’re in AP Stats, right?” Lexa asked.

Raven nodded. “Mr. Pike is ruthless, but it’s an easy class if you’re good with numbers. 

“I am,” Lexa said.

“Me, too,” Raven echoed, a challenge in her voice.

“Down, girl,” Octavia said. “Not everything is a competition.”

“That, Blake, is where you are wrong,” Raven said, but she grinned and stole a french fry from Octavia’s tray.

Octavia swatted her hand away. “Get your own, Reyes,” she said.

Lexa looked on with envy. It was clear that they were a close knit group of friends, something Lexa had never had. She’d never allowed herself to. Not after Costia. She’d had friends, of course, but no one she’d ever considered close. It hadn’t really been hard to leave her old friends behind. 

And it was hard for her to trust people. People had let her down so many times before because of something that was out of her control. The fact that she was a girl who happened to have a penis really pissed of a lot of people for some reason. She winced slightly when she remembered the cracked rib she’d received at her last school when the wrong people had found out about her anatomy. 

When she’d been born, they’d figured her to be a boy. She’d been raised as a boy for the first three years of her life. It was only when she insisted that she was a girl that they found out that she had two X chromosomes and was, in fact, intersex. It was an extremely rare condition, but from that day on, she was raised as her true gender. Female.

That, of course, didn’t stop the raging gender dysphoria that popped up every now and then, but Lexa had come to accept her body, penis and all, for the most part. It had taken years of therapy, but acceptance of her body had slowly but surely come. It didn’t help, however, when someone found out and called her a freak of nature.

So, she kept to herself and tried to lay low. Or, at least she was trying to.

These people were making that rather difficult.

Octavia was currently inviting her to a girls’ night sleepover that she was having that Friday. Definite no-no. She had to think up an excuse quick. “Oh, um, sorry. I can’t. My sister is coming home from college this weekend.”

It wasn’t a lie. Anya _was_ coming home this weekend. She just left out the part that she came home nearly every weekend and it wouldn’t have been a big deal if they hung out on Sunday instead of Saturday.

Lexa noticed Clarke giving her an inquisitive look and she suddenly became very interested in her broccoli. Clarke, to Lexa’s appreciation, didn’t say anything if she noticed anything weird. She changed the subject instead.

“Speaking of competition, Octavia, you’ll have some on the field next fall,” Clarke said, grinning.

“Oh, yeah?” Octavia asked, leaning forward to study Lexa. “You play soccer?" 

Lexa nodded, struggling to swallow her bite of broccoli. She really hated broccoli. “Yeah,” she said. “Center forward.”

Octavia looked impressed. “I’m Captain of the varsity team. Hope you’re staying in shape in the off season. We lost our best center forward to a knee injury a few weeks into the last season. We’d have gone all the way to state if she’d been playing.” 

“She’s on the track team, too,” Clarke supplied. She saw Raven give her a knowing look and discretely flipped her off.

“Cross country,” Lexa corrected her.

“Same thing,” Clarke said, waving a dismissive hand. But she softened her words with a grin.

“I hate running,” Octavia said.

“That’s what I said,” Clarke agreed.

“You play soccer but you hate running?” Lexa asked with a smirk. “You must be a goalie.”

“Best damn goalie in the county,”  Lincoln finally spoke. He was generally pretty quiet but always the first to support and brag about Octavia. “I can’t even get a shot past her ninety percent of the time.”

Octavia rewarded him with a kiss on the cheek. “Lincoln is the star of the boy’s varsity team,” she explained. “These two are lazy when it comes to anything involving physical activity,” she continued, gesturing to Clarke and Raven.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I was too busy _getting shot and losing function of my leg_ to kick balls around a field,” Raven said dryly.

Lexa gasped. “You were shot?”

Raven looked at her and shrugged. “Freak accident,” she said and sat up straighter. “I was tinkering with the toaster on the floor of our apartment, trying to fix it, and the dumbass redneck in the apartment below ours was cleaning his gun and it went off. It went through the ceiling and floor and into my spine. They didn’t think I’d walk again but I’m an overachiever.”

“Oh my god,” Lexa said, shocked. “How long ago was this?”

“About three years ago,” Raven said. “I still have to wear a brace in order to walk and I’ll always have a limp, but I manage." 

“Wow,” was all Lexa could say in response.

Clarke put an arm around Raven. “She now likes to play pranks on us and pretend she’s fallen down and re-injured herself,” she said. “So, if she seems hurt, ignore her." 

“Hey!” Raven cried out.

“Boy who cried wolf, Rae,” Octavia said.

Raven sulked, but didn’t say anything more. The bell dismissing lunch rang and they all rose, gathered their lunch trays, and said their goodbyes for now. Clarke knew Lexa’s next class was AP Lit, as was her own, so they walked together.

“Mr. Kane is pretty chill,” Clarke explained as they navigated the bustling hallways. “Just don’t have your cell phone out during class or he’ll take it up and keep it until the end of the school day.”

“No cell phone,” Lexa repeated. “Got it.”

“Speaking of,” Clarke said as they came to a stop outside the Mr. Kane’s classroom, “we should exchange numbers. Since we’re writing partners and all.”

Lexa nodded. “Sure.” She took her iPhone out of her pocket and unlocked it. She created a new contact and typed in Clarke’s name. “Here,” she said, handing the blonde her phone.

Clarke typed in her number, took a silly selfie for the contact photo, then handed it back. Lexa opened iMessage and sent Clarke a text with her name so she’d have her number as well. “There,” she said just as the late bell rung. Mr. Kane hurried them inside before the tardy sweep began. 

The class was the uneventful for Clarke. Lexa was assigned a seat across the room and she couldn’t even text her for fear of having her phone taken up by Mr. Kane. That was a mistake she’d only made once.

Fifty-one minutes and a unit pre-test later, the bell rang and Clarke directed Lexa towards her next class, which was in the opposite direction of Clarke’s own art class. Clarke watched Lexa retreat until she rounded the corner, wondering why it was that she was so intrigued by this new girl.

Once she made it to her art class, she pulled out her phone and opened her iMessage to save Lexa’s number. Then, looking around to make sure the teacher wasn’t paying her any attention, she typed out a message.

CLARKE (11:52AM):

_ >> I need a picture of your for my contacts :) _

Not expecting a reply any time soon since she knew the girl was in AP French, she slid her phone back into her pocket and picked up the oil pastel stick. Oil pastels weren’t her favorite medium, she preferred either pencil or charcoal drawings or acrylic paints, so she wasn’t completely happy with her landscape. She was contemplating how to fix the coloring of the sunset when she felt her phone buzz in her back pocket. She fished it out, carefully avoiding getting any of the pastel pigment on her case, and unlocked it.

She nearly laughed aloud when she saw that Lexa had sent her a picture, but it wasn’t a selfie. It was a picture of a raccoon, teeth bared and eyes wild.

She quickly replied.

CLARKE (12:05PM):

_ >> A raccoon? Seriously? _

LEXA (12:05PM):

_ >> I like raccoons. They’re ferocious beasts. _

CLARKE (12:06PM):

_ >> I think you mean cute. _

LEXA (12:08PM):

_ >> Ferocious. Beasts. _

Clarke chuckled and glanced around. Being a top art student, the teacher rarely came to offer assistance that she didn’t need, so she didn’t worry about being caught texting instead of working on her project. She was almost done anyway. Instead, she pulled out her sketchbook and did a quick pencil sketch of a cute baby raccoon clinging to a tree. She took a photo of it, saved it as Lexa’s contact photo, then sent the image to the girl.

CLARKE (12:21PM):

_ >> I like my version better ;) _

LEXA (12:25PM):

_ >> You drew that in ten minutes? _

CLARKE (12:26PM):

_ >> Pfft. Piece of cake. Give me an hour and I’ll draw you a masterpiece. _

LEXA (12:31PM):

 _ >> I like the one you drew, even if it is a little too cutesy for my ferociousness._ 

Clarke grinned and made sure she was still in the clear and noticed the teacher give her the stink eye. Whoops. 

CLARKE (12:33PM):

_ >> Busted by the teacher. Gotta go. See you in P.E., raccoon girl. _

Clarke spent the rest of the class period working on a more detailed drawing of a cute baby raccoon.


	2. Space Cadet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke is not the most coordinated person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the comments and kudos! I really appreciate it, and I am glad that you all seem to be enjoying this fic. :)

Clarke was always grateful that P.E. was her last class of the day. She hated the class, as did most of her classmates, but at least she didn’t have to try and be presentable for other classes after getting all sweaty. It’s not that she minded getting sweaty, but she’d rather not do it while having to also be coordinated at the same time. 

See, Clarke had an issue when it came to anything requiring an athletic talent. Coordination, especially of the hand-eye variety, was not something she was blessed with. Give her an canvass and some paints and she could create perfectly detailed paintings of landscapes, people, or even friggen bowls of fruit. 

But give her a basketball and ask her to toss it through that goddamn metal hoop? You’re asking for trouble. 

Just ask the senior girl who was currently cursing under her breath after Clarke accidentally caused her basketball to bounce off the backboard and careen off wildly to hit the older girl smack in the back of the head. Oops. 

“Wooo, Griffin!” she heard Raven’s voice boom over the gym. “Way to hit the backboard this time. Try to get it  _ in _ the hoop next time!” 

Clarke glared at her friend who sat in the stands watching them play some dumbass game that Clarke always prayed to be ‘out’ of in the first round, which she usually was. Because of Raven’s leg, she couldn’t participate in most of the P.E. activities and had to do written work related to fitness and kinesiology to make up the grade. Raven wasn’t mad about it and usually finished the assignment within the first fifteen minutes of class. Then she’d sit and catcall Clarke and tease her about her lack of coordination. 

At least she hadn’t tripped in front of Lexa. Yet.

“You weren’t kidding about you and sports, huh?” a voice said from Clarke’s right. She turned and saw Lexa skillfully dribbling a basketball, dressed in a brand new school-issued P.E. t-shirt and loose knee-length basketball shorts. She was an enigma, Clarke decided. Her shirt was tight across her toned abs and chest, almost on the verge of being a size too small, but her Nike athletic shorts were loose and most likely from the men’s department. Clarke herself always had to go a size up on the shirt so it wouldn’t be constricting on her chest. 

Clarke shook her head. “Please have mercy on me and get me out,” she begged. Lexa laughed, took one shoot of the basketball and made it in, nothing but net. “Thank you,” Clarke said, heading over to sit against the wall. She hoped this round would last the rest of the class. 

Clarke wasn’t surprised when Lexa went on to win the round. And the next. Clarke was impressed, and a bit envious, to be honest. She wished that she was coordinated,even just a little bit. 

Finally-- _ finally _ \--the school day was nearly over and they were dismissed to the locker room to change and get ready for dismissal (after running five laps around the massive gym, of course). Clarke grabbed her clothes out of her locker and turned to face Lexa. “I don’t normally shower here since it’s the last class of the day,” she said, sitting down on the bench to untie and remove her Nike gym shoes. “Unless I have to be somewhere right after school, I’d rather shower when I get home.”

Lexa nodded. “I detest public showers, so I’m glad I have P.E. last.” What she didn’t say was that she’d been assigned P.E. at the end of the day by her understanding counselor in order to avoid having to shower at school. Like most of the students, she noted, she’d just shower at home. Unlike most students, however, it was because it would be too easy for someone to see her atypical anatomy. At least this school had individual stalls to shower in, with flimsy plastic curtains for each tiny stall. Her old school was just an open row of shower heads. No way in hell.

As it was, she wasn’t even going to change out of her gym shorts. She’d managed to change in a bathroom stall earlier, citing the need to pee as her excuse. She’d keep up the charade for the rest of the year. 

Clarke tugged off her sweaty gym shirt, turning slightly towards the locker as she quickly balled it up and tossed it inside, uncaring if it got wrinkled. In the same motion, she pulled the shirt she’d been wearing earlier over her head and into place. She turned to say something to Lexa, but the words caught in her throat when she saw the girl tug her own tight t-shirt over her head and, like Clarke, toss it carelessly into her locker. She wore a black sports bra underneath that was like those workout bras you’d see women exercising or running in all the time, but what made Clarke pause, however, was the sight of Lexa’s abs. Holy fuck, that was hot. They weren’t overly defined in an unnatural way, but Clarke could definitely tell that the girl worked out on a regular basis. Not a six pack, but no trace of extra fat, either. 

Clarke knew she herself was no ugly duckling and, though she didn’t really get much exercise, her metabolism was decent enough to keep her own physique trim with a bit of curves. She knew her peers, boys and girls alike, would look as she walked by. And she knew many girls, Raven included, were jealous of her generous bust. 

But damn. Lexa’s abs were seriously fucking hot. 

“Earth to Princess Griffin,” a voice drew her out of her daydream, a pair of fingers snapping in front of her face. 

Clarke blinked and whipped her head to see Raven standing beside her, a smug grin on her face. “Huh?” 

“What were you staring at, space cadet?” Raven asked. 

“Oh, um, nothing,” she said, shaking her head, feeling her face burn. She glanced over to see Lexa giving her a curious look. Clarke only hoped she hadn’t noticed her staring at her abs. “I was just feeling a bit lightheaded is all.” 

“Oh, I’m sure,” Raven said, that stupid grin still on her face. 

Clarke scowled at her. “I’m still sick, asshole,” she growled, then sniffled in effort to support her claim. But the truth was that she didn’t feel nearly as gross as she had that morning. Her sinuses had begun to clear and the massive headache had dimmed to a dull ache. And she no longer sounded like death warmed over. Thank god. 

By then, Lexa had pulled on the tank top she’d been wearing earlier and shut her locker door with a metallic  _ clang _ . “Um, thanks again for showing me the ropes today,” she said, standing with her school bag over one shoulder as she awkwardly shuffled from one foot to another. She cast a cursory glance at the clock when the dismissal bell rang just then, noting that the end of the school day was at exactly 2:10 in the afternoon. 

Clarke shrugged and pulled her jeans out of her locker. She was debating changing back into them or just wearing her gym shorts home, but decided to change. With her luck, she’d forget to bring the shorts back the next day and then have to wear the dorky ‘I forgot my gym clothes’ shorts that the school provided. They were lime green, neon orange, and bright purple camo print and a true crime against fashion. “Like I said, I was the new kids a few years ago and remember what it’s like.”

Clarke shook out her jeans and avoided eye contact with Lexa as she shucked off her shorts and kicked them aside before pulling on her tight black skinny jeans as quickly as she could. Unfortunately, she forgot that they were the pair with the ripped knees and her foot got caught in one of the holes. What happened next was a blur to Clarke and she would have to rely on Raven and Lexa’s versions of the stories to fill in the gaps. (She believed Lexa’s version of the story over Raven’s overly dramatic tale of cartoon-like events.)

In attempt to not ruin her favorite pair of jeans, Clarke shifted her weight to the left, over compensated, and fell flat on her ass in the middle of the locker room, jeans still around her knees with one leg sticking out through the ripped knee. 

“Oh my god, are you alright?” Clarke heard Lexa’s voice over Raven’s hysterical laughter. 

Clarke blinked, looking up into Lexa’s green eyes, filled with concern. “Ow,” was all she could manage. 

Lexa reached out a hand, which Clarke carefully grasped. The stronger girl hoisted her up, Clarke keeping her other hand firmly on the waistband of her jeans. She felt her cheeks burning as she quickly righted her foot and pulled the denim up. “Thanks,  _ Lexa _ ,” Clarke said, emphasizing Lexa’s name as she glared at Raven, who was still doubled over in laughter. 

“Oh my god, I have tears,” Raven huffed out between breaths. “Like, actual tears.” 

“I’m glad my distress and utter humiliation is entertainment for you, Reyes,” Clarke growled. She was avoiding looking at Lexa as she hurriedly zipped and buttoned her jeans, snatched her shorts off the ground, threw them into her locker, and slammed the door shut. “Not to mention my bruised ass.” 

“If it makes you feel any better,” Lexa began, “I once was trying on a pair of jeans in a dressing room, went out to show them to my sister and face planted in front of a bunch of girls trying on prom dresses. I ended up with a bloody nose and bled all over the jeans. I had to buy them and could never even wear them because they were stained with blood.” 

“That… does make me feel a bit better about myself,” Clarke said, finally cracking a smile. She was still mortified, but Lexa’s voice was calming and lacked any hint of judgement. Unlike Raven, that asshole. 

Clarke gave Raven one last glare and hooked her arm around Lexa’s elbow. “Come on,” she said, walking towards the exit. “We have a paper to work on.” 

“Smooth, Griffin!” Clarke heard Raven yell from the locker room. 

Clarke ignored her. 

“Are we really going to work on the paper now?” Lexa asked her once they’d made it out of the locker room. “Because I really need a shower. And I thought you were going to go straight to bed to sleep?” 

Clarke stopped and turned to face the girl. “We don’t have to today,” she said. “I just wanted to get out of there before I embarrassed myself any further. Or Raven did. And I’m feeling a lot better than I did this morning, so I’m okay to work today, if you want. It’s cool if you don’t, though.” 

Lexa smiled, but once again, Clarke noticed that it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Don’t be embarrassed,” she said. “It happens.” 

Clarke grimaced. “At least I wasn’t wearing granny panties,” she muttered, thankful she’d grabbed dark gray boyshorts with the black lace trim that morning. If she’d been looking at Lexa, she’d have noticed the girl’s cheeks tinged with pink, but she was busy rummaging in her bag for her car keys. “Anyway, you can shower at my house, if you want. We have three.” 

Lexa shifted awkwardly. “Oh, um, I don’t have clothes to change into,” she said, thinking up the first excuse she could. Rule number one: never get naked at someone else’s house. 

Clarke seemed to agree because she didn’t push the suggestion. “Right. Um, well, we’d run into the same problem every day since we have gym last. Where do you live?” 

Lexa named a subdivision and Clarke nodded. “That’s close to me,” she said. “I can swing by in like an hour and pick you up? Or we could just work on it at your place."

Lexa shook her head. “Normally, that’d be fine except we have boxes everywhere from the move. My mother is kind of a neat freak and it would give her a heart attack if she knew anyone saw the house in such disarray. Also, my little brother will be home and is really annoying.” 

Clarke chuckled. “Okay, so I can pick you up and drive us back to my house. Like I said, my mom is at work and I don’t have any siblings.” 

“Today?” Lexa asked, chewing on her lower lip. 

Clarke nodded. “May as well get the paper out of the way.” 

Lexa nodded. “I just need to ask my mom,” she said. 

“Okay. Text me when you do.” 

“Okay.”

 

***

 

Clarke looked up in surprise when she heard the loud growl. Lexa looked equally as shocked, blinking in surprise as she glanced down at her stomach. 

“Someone is hungry,” Clarke said. 

Lexa gave her a sheepish look. “I didn’t even realize how hungry I was until now,” she admitted. 

Clarke glanced at the clock on her nightstand. They were sitting in her room, Clarke on her bed and Lexa in her desk chair, as they worked on their paper. They’d been working for a little over an hour, Clarke noted. It was approaching six o’clock. 

“Want to order a pizza?” she asked. “Do you even eat pizza?” 

Lexa laughed. “I’m a growing teenager, Clarke. Of course I eat pizza. As long as it has a whole wheat crust with low fat vegan cheese and tons of veggies.” 

Clarke stared at Lexa like she’d grown a second head. 

“Kidding,” Lexa said. “Double cheese, pepperoni, and mushrooms.”

Clarke clutched her chest dramatically. “Thank god,” she said, letting out a relieved breath. “No mushrooms, though.” She made a disgusted face.

Lexa laughed. “Okay, I can deal with that.” 

Clarke ordered the pizza and they moved to the kitchen while they waited. The research for the paper took the longest to compile, though they both admitted that they were probably going above the expectations of the assignment. Neither one cared. 

They’d finished the introduction and first two paragraphs of the rough draft when the doorbell rang. 

“This is amazing,” Lexa said as she chewed her first bite of the delicious pizza. 

Clarke nodded in agreement. “They have the best pizza,” she explained, indicating the company logo on the box. “Do you want something to drink?” 

“Water is fine,” Lexa said. 

“Water with pizza, what kind of teenager are you?” Clarke teased, grabbing a bottle of water from the refrigerator for Lexa while grabbing herself a Sprite. 

Lexa just shrugged and opened the water, taking a long drink from the bottle. “I typically only drink water,” she said. “I was never allowed soda or sugary drinks growing up, so I’m used to it."

Clarke sipped her own sugary drink, smacking her lips. “Your loss.” She took another bite of pizza as she studied her new… friend? “So, you’re from Washington, D.C.?” she asked, curious about Lexa’s background. 

Lexa tensed slightly, but she nodded. “Uh huh,” she said, offering nothing more. 

Clarke pressed on. “What made you guys move to the West Coast?” she asked, picking off a piece of pepperoni and placing it in her mouth to chew. 

Lexa shrugged. “Some… things happened. We needed a new start.”

“What kind of things?” Clarke asked, too distracted by the pizza in her hand to notice Lexa’s discomfort. 

“Just… drama. It wasn’t safe, so we moved here.” 

Clarke looked up, concerned. “Not safe? Why?” 

Lexa chewed on her bottom lip again, a nervous habit. Then she sat up straighter. “I like you, Clarke, but I don’t know you well enough to really discuss it. It’s nothing personal, I promise. It’s just a sensitive topic.” 

Lexa was grateful when Clarke nodded. “Okay, I respect that. I mean, you’re right. We only met, what? Ten hours ago?”

Lexa smiled, this time it looked more genuine than earlier in the day, and relaxed. “Thank you, Clarke. Most people would pry more.” 

Clarke shrugged. “Not my business,” she said around another mouthful of pizza. “You’ll tell me if and when you want to.” 

Lexa didn’t say anything in response. She just took another bite of pizza and studied Clarke as she enjoyed her pizza and perused Snapchat on her phone. The blonde was gorgeous in an effortless way. She had natural curves that Lexa had forced herself to ignore earlier in the locker room, especially when Clarke had fallen over while her jeans were still around her ankles. She refused to be  _ that _ lesbian. She definitely hadn’t noticed the black lace border on her underwear. Nope. No way. 

What really got Lexa--other than the underwear that she definitely  _ hadn’t _ been looking at--was the girl’s crystal clear blue eyes. She’d wondered if Clarke was wearing those colored contacts, but when she’d pulled out a pair of reading glasses while working on their essay, that theory had been disproven. 

Lexa knew she shouldn’t get too attached to the blonde, especially not so quickly, but she felt herself drawn to her in a way that she hadn’t felt since…

Nope. No. She was not going down that avenue of thought. Not today. 

Today, she was going to spend time getting to know her new friend, against her better judgement. She cleared her throat.

“So, Clarke, why art?” 

 

***

 

By Friday, Lexa found herself wishing that she could attend Octavia’s girls’ night sleepover and cursed her situation that made it difficult for her to attend such activities. Not that she’d ever desired to do so in the past. She’d never allowed herself to become close enough to anyone else to even be asked. But now...

“Are you sure you can’t come over tonight, Lexa?” Octavia asked again as she popped a french fry into her mouth. 

Lexa nodded. “Yeah, Anya’s coming home tonight. We’re more like best friends than sisters.” 

“Bring her with you,” Octavia said. “If she’s anything like you, we’ll get along just fine.” 

Clarke snorted. “Octavia, the girl is in college. You really think she wants to hang out with a bunch of seventeen year olds?” 

Lexa saw an opportunity. “Well, I mean, she probably wouldn’t want to spend the night, but maybe we can drop by for a few hours? We’d probably just be watching movies and talking all night, anyway.” 

Octavia squealed in delight. She’d taken an oddly intense immediate liking to the new girl. Probably because it gave her another jock to discuss sports with, soccer in particular. “Awesome! Party starts at six. We’re ordering all kinds of junk food, so no need to bring anything. I’ll text you the address.” 

Lexa nodded and watched Clarke, taking careful note of the grin that spread across her face as the conversation unfolded. She’d tried to not think about her over the week, but had failed miserably. Something about her just… clicked. As they’d worked on the paper, Lexa’s theory about the blonde being intelligent was proven to be correct. Clarke was smart, and not in that know-it-all kind of way that Lexa had to admit she’d fallen into the category of in the past, though she was really trying to not be that girl. So, far, she’d managed. It was easy when you were surrounded by other equally smart people (Raven was a certified genius and Octavia could definitely hold her own). 

Together, Lexa and Clarke had managed to finish the final draft of their paper and their presentation materials by Wednesday. Mr. Mendez had been impressed to say the least.

And they’d aced their presentation, thank you very much. 

Clarke, in the meantime, tried not to allow her glee that Lexa would be joining them that evening show too much, least Raven notice and tease her mercilessly. It was pointless in denying that she’d developed a massive crush on Lexa, but she didn’t want everyone to know about it. Especially not Lexa, who played it super close to the vest. It was always difficult to figure out what the brunette was thinking. She wanted her to trust her enough to open up, so she didn’t want to scare her away with an added pressure of  _ feelings _ . 

So she kept quiet. Raven suspected, of course, but for now she was quiet about it, unless they were alone. Then she teased Clarke to no end while Clarke rolled her eyes and denied everything. 

Or, tried to. She couldn’t help it if the mere sight of Lexa’s abs threw her into a spiral of daydreams. She’d taken to facing away from her when the gym shirt came off, but it was a challenge to keep her back turned. 

She also was not going to admit that she’d been rotating through her nicer bras and underwear in the last week. Satin and lace and cute prints over the boring black cotton that she was known to favor. (Raven noticed.) 

Raven also noticed Clarke’s grin and gave her a knowing look. 

Clarke flipped her off. 

 

***

 

“Alright, everyone. Pair up and sit together. Partner pop quiz!” 

The class groaned, but Clarke didn’t mind. She caught Lexa’s eye across the room and the brunette motioned her over. Clarke gathered her books and bag and made her way across to the room to sit next to Lexa. “Bring it on,” she said as she settled into the desk next to Lexa. 

“Between the two of us, we should ace this,” Lexa said. 

“Pfft, puh-leeze,” Clarke said with a mock scoff. “I could ace this on my own, thank you very much.” 

“Whatever, Griffin,” Lexa said, having picked up on Raven’s habit of calling her by her last name. At least she didn’t call her ‘Princess.’ “I bet you’re stumped by question three.” 

Lexa was wrong. She was stumped by question number two. 

“I hate poetry,” Clarke pouted, muttering under her breath. “Whilst the wither quakes with Shake-n-Bakes that nature forsakes blah blah blah. Fucking nonsense.” 

Lexa had to clasp a hand over her mouth to stop the snort from escaping. “It’s okay, Clarke. You knew the other questions.” 

“Still dumb,” she said, writing her name at the top of the paper before sliding it over to Lexa to do the same. 

“I don’t know,” Lexa said. “I think poetry can be quite beautiful. It’s another form of art, you know.” 

Clarke shrugged. “I prefer visual art,” she said. “Things I can see. Words aren’t my strong suit.” 

“Fair enough,” Lexa said. “I used to dance. That used to be how I expressed myself in an artistic way. Contemporary and hip hop were my favorite forms.” 

“Why’d you stop?” Clarke asked.

Lexa shifted her eyes downward. “Personal reasons,” she said softly. 

Clarke had come to learn that ‘personal reasons’ was Lexa’s answer to anything that had to do with Washington, D.C. and why her family left. So she didn’t push, knowing the best way to win the girl’s trust was to respect her wishes. 

It wasn’t that she wasn’t  _ insanely _ curious about Lexa’s past, she was, but she was also scared of pushing her away. She tried to think of a new subject, but was saved from having to do so by Mr. Kane calling everyone’s attention. “Time’s up! Please pass your papers forward, then return to your seats. We will spend the rest of the class doing some independent journaling.” 

Clarke gave Lexa a reassuring smile and made her way back to her assigned seat. She wondered how long it would take for Lexa to open up to her more. She hoped it wasn’t too long. She wanted to know everything about her. She cast a curious look at her across the room, smiling at the look of complete concentration on her face as she wrote in her composition notebook.

Journaling in the literature class was meant to be a way for students to express their thoughts without the pressure of being judged. Mr. Kane didn’t collect and read the journals and you could write about anything you wanted. Clarke usually bent the rules a bit and drew something instead. Mr. Kane had said it was fine so long as she was using the drawings to express her thoughts and emotions. She’d scoffed internally. Why else would she draw? 

Today, Clarke drew Lexa, but in raccoon form. She wasn’t sure why the girl was so drawn to raccoons, but it weirdly suited her. Clarke drew Lexa’s hair in intricate braids, her eyes surrounded by dark smudges, much like a raccoon. 

The ringing of the bell broke Clarke’s concentration and she jumped slightly. She’d completely lost track of time. She quickly closed her journal and slid it into her bag, not wanting anyone to see that she’d been drawing the new girl. 

“See you in P.E.,” Lexa said as they exited the classroom. 

“See you,” Clarke echoed as she watched Lexa retreat. 

_ Stop being so goddamn thirsty, _ Clarke scolded herself as she made her way to art class. She had to stop thinking so much about Lexa. 

Easier said than done. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact of the day: One time, a few months ago, I placed my Starbucks order and gave my name (which is actually Lexa in case you didn't read the end note on my last chapter) to the barista, but she didn't believe that my name was actually Lexa, so she wrote "Clarke's love" on the cup instead. My wife (Claire) didn't appreciate that.


	3. Never Have I Ever...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Protective big sister Anya, Never Have I Ever, and Raven has a new crush...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU everyone for all the comments, kudos, and bookmarks! I am so pleased that you all seem to be enjoying this.

“This is my sister, Anya.” Beside Lexa stood a tall, slim girl several years older than Lexa.

 

Clarke, Raven, and Octavia greeted Anya as they stood in the foyer of Octavia’s house.

 

“So, one of you is adopted, right?” Raven asked bluntly after the door was closed behind the sisters.

 

“Raven!” Octavia scolded. Clarke just chuckled and rolled her eyes at her friend’s complete lack of tact. 

 

“What?” Raven asked, looking offended that Octavia would scold her. “Dude, Lexa is obviously white and Anya is of some Asian descent. I’m Latina; I can ask these questions.” 

 

“Nepalese,” Anya corrected. “And it’s fine. We have the same dad, but different mothers. My biological mother was from Nepal and died during childbirth, then my dad married Lexa’s mom a few years later and Lexa came along nine months after that.”

 

“Honeymoon baby, nice,” Raven said, playfully punching Lexa’s upper arm.

 

“Anyway,” Lexa said, stressing the word and rubbing her arm. “The nosey one is Raven. Then there’s Octavia--this is her house--and Clarke.” 

 

Clarke gave a small wave as she took in the sight of Lexa’s sister. She was a bit… intimidating, to say the least. And it was obvious that she was protective of her younger sister. Clarke could tell by the way she stood slightly in front of Lexa, shielding her from potential threats.

 

“I’m bored. I want food,” Raven announced. 

 

“You always want food,” Clarke pointed out. 

 

“Whatever, Griffin,” Raven said, shuffling towards the large kitchen. “I was promised food, O.” 

 

“On its way, glutton,” Octavia said as she followed Raven. Clarke hung back and smiled at Lexa and Anya.

 

“We’re really glad you decided to join us,” she said. “Even if you’re not staying the night. Are you sure we can’t tempt you? The fun doesn’t really start until after midnight.”

 

Lexa looked momentarily distressed and cast a worried look at her sister. Anya shook her head. “Our parents insist on taking us out on Lake Mead tomorrow and we’re leaving at 6:30 in the morning,” she said. 

 

Clarke nodded, accepting her answer. “Another time, then,” she said. “Anyway, it’s nice meeting you, Anya. Lexa talks about you a lot.”

 

Anya glanced at her sister, narrowing her eyes. “All good things, I hope.”

 

Clarke grinned. “Mostly,” she said. 

 

“Well, she can’t shut up about you,” Anya said. Lexa dug her elbow into her sister’s ribs. “Ow, what? It’s true.” 

 

“Let’s go see what they’re doing in the kitchen,” Lexa said, voice a bit louder than normal. She pulled Anya behind her. 

 

“Wait, I need the bathroom,” Anya protested. 

 

Lexa looked at Clarke in question. She’d never been to Octavia’s house before, so she wasn’t sure where it was. 

 

“I’ll show you,” Clarke said. “I need it, too and the one on this level is being remodeled and is out of commission. We have to use the one in the basement.”

 

“I’ll meet you in the kitchen, Lex,” Anya said. 

 

Lexa looked hesitant for a moment, then nodded. “Okay.” She threw her sister a warning look that Anya pretended not to see.

 

Clarke led the older girl down the stairs to the finished basement. The space had been transformed into a media room of sorts with a large tv, tons of plush furniture, and the latest gaming systems. There was also a full bathroom, which Clarke pointed out. 

 

As Clarke waited for Anya to emerge, she scrolled through her phone, snorting at Octavia’s latest Snap of her and Raven using a voice changing filter to belt out “I will always love you” while using a banana as a microphone. It had been posted 2 minutes ago.

 

The sound of running water pulled Clarke from her social media haze and she locked her phone, ready for her turn in the bathroom. The door opened and she was greeted with the sight of Anya, but her earlier smile was gone, replaced with a hardened, intimidating look as she stared Clarke down. 

 

“What?” Clarke asked timidly, stepping back so that her back hit the wall.

 

Anya narrowed her eyes and regarded her closely. “My sister has been through a lot.”

 

“I know,” Clarke said. 

 

Anya raised an eyebrow. “You know?” 

 

“I don’t know specifics, but I know she’s had a hard time,” Clarke clarified. 

 

Anya nodded. “Just, don’t do anything to hurt her or you’ll have me to answer to.”

 

Clarke gulped. “I have no plans on hurting anyone,” she said. 

 

“Look, Clarke,” Anya said, stepping forward. “I don’t know you from Eve, but I know my sister and I know how hard it is for her to make friends. Which is why it surprised me when she told me about you. She doesn’t trust easily, so if you win that trust, you better not fuck it up.” With that, she turned and made her way back up the stairs, leaving a stunned Clarke behind. 

 

What the fuck had just happened? 

 

Clarke did her best to avoid Anya for the rest of the night, not wanting to give her any ammunition to prompt another protective older sister encounter. Unfortunately, that also meant she was avoiding Lexa since they never left one another’s side other than the bathroom run where Clarke had been cornered earlier.

 

At the moment, Clarke was draped across one of the giant reclining chairs, a plush blanket warding off the chill of the basement as the credits to the movie they’d been watching rolled. Across the room, Raven stood and stretched. Octavia also stood, moving to the wall and flipping on the lights. 

 

“I’m bored again,” Raven said. “Let’s play a game.” 

 

“If you suggest truth or dare, I am going to punch you in the face,” Octavia said. 

 

“Same,” Clarke said, sitting up on her chair. She cast a glance at Lexa, who shared a couch with Anya. Truth or dare was probably an uncomfortable game for Lexa. 

 

Raven pouted. “Fine,” she said. “How about Never Have I Ever?” 

 

So that’s how they got to their current state, sitting in a circle on the floor as they each held a drink in front of them. Non-alcoholic, of course. Octavia’s mom was home and would check in on them periodically. 

 

“Okay, okay,” Raven said when she’d managed to stop laughing. The game had turned into a game of get Octavia to drink every round. Admittedly it would be more fun with alcohol, but it was still highly amusing. “Never have I ever… made out with someone I had met less than an hour before.” 

 

“Fuck you,” Octavia said, taking a drink of her Sprite. “I knew  _ of  _ Lincoln for weeks.” 

 

Clarke noticed Anya also take a drink and Lexa look at her incredulously. “What?” the older girl asked. “I’m in college.” 

 

Lexa just rolled her eyes and grinned. “Okay, my turn,” she said. “Never have I ever… kissed a boy.” 

 

“I hate you all,” Octavia said, taking another drink. Raven, Clarke, and Anya also drank. 

 

Clarke narrowed her eyes at Lexa, wondering… 

 

“Never have I ever made out with a girl,” Clarke said, grinning. She was bisexual, and she’d known it for a couple years, but she hadn’t actually acted on it. Yet. 

 

Lexa smirked and took a drink while keeping eye contact. Raven also drank. And then Anya. 

 

Octavia was next, and she rubbed her hands together as she thought about who she would embarrass in the name of payback. “Okay, never have I ever had a crush on a friend.” 

 

Anya drank.

 

Clarke glared at Raven and drank. Raven howled. 

 

“Oy, Reyes, drink up,” Clarke said. “You had a massive crush on O when you first met her.” 

 

Raven shook her head. “We weren’t friends yet. By the time we were, that crush was gone because gross.”

 

“Hey!” Octavia protested. 

 

Raven gave her a look. “You  _ want _ me to be crushing on you?” 

 

Octavia grimaced. “Okay, point taken.” 

 

Clarke wasn’t paying them any attention. She was too busy watching Lexa take a drink. Her eyes met Clarke’s and her cheeks turned pink. 

 

Interesting. 

 

While the others were trying to embarrass Octavia and Octavia was trying to exact her revenge. Anya had other motives. She was using the game to vet Clarke. And Clarke knew this. She braced herself for the next question. 

 

“Never have I ever sent someone a nude photo.” 

 

Clarke didn’t drink, but raised her eyebrows when Octavia did. 

 

“I’ve been with Lincoln for nearly a year,” was all she said in response with a shrug of her shoulders. 

 

“We’ll be discussing this later,” Raven said, pointing a finger at Octavia. “But for now, it’s my turn. Never have I ever been walked in on while masturbating.”

 

Octavia reached back and grabbed a pillow from the couch. She threw it at Raven. “I am never telling you anything ever again.” She drank. 

 

So did Lexa, her entire face red as she avoided eye contact with everyone in the room. 

 

Oh. Well. Clarke was speechless, and, yep, turned on. Fuck. 

 

Raven immediately began grilling the poor girl.

 

“It was me,” Anya said, saving Lexa from having to answer. “Came home from school early. It was awkward. We got over it. The end.” 

 

The way Anya said ‘the end’ let everyone, especially Raven, that the topic was now closed. No one dared press the conversation. 

 

Lexa cleared her throat, knowing it was her turn. “Um, so, never have I ever gone skinny dipping.”

 

“Boring,” Raven said in a sing-song voice. Then she drank. Clarke, Octavia, and Anya followed. 

 

“Wait, seriously?” Lexa said. “I’m the only one?” 

 

Clarke had to hold back on the suggestion that they fix that right then. Octavia’s backyard boasted a heated pool. But she didn’t think Anya would appreciate that. Instead, she took her turn, deciding to up the ante. “Never have I ever had sex with a girl.”

 

The only one to drink was Anya. Lexa just looked at Clarke, head tilted slightly to the side as she smirked. 

 

Also interesting. 

 

Raven was busy gaping at Anya, wanting to pry more into the question, but also a bit scared of the girl. She wisely remained silent.

 

“Never have I ever questioned my sexuality,” Octavia said. Then she was the only one to not drink. “It’s rough being the token straight girl of the group,” she muttered, but laughed to show that she was joking. 

 

“Okay, okay, that’s enough,” Clarke said, standing. “I have to pee again.” She headed towards the bathroom. 

 

“Me, first!” Octavia yelled, barreling past Clarke and hurrying into the bathroom, shutting and locking the door before Clarke could even protest. 

 

“Hey!” Clarke called out, pounding on the door. “Cheater!”

 

“My house!” Octavia said from inside. Clarke grumbled and waited.

 

“Octavia, hurry up,” Clarke said two minutes later, pounding on the door. “I really have to go.”

 

“My Diva Cup is being a bitch,” Octavia said, her voice muffled by the door. “Use mine upstairs.” 

 

Clarke sighed, but relented, moving towards the stairs. 

 

“Wait, I need it, too,” Lexa’s voice said behind her. 

 

Clarke paused momentarily, allowing Lexa to catch up. “We have to go to the second level,” she said.

 

“Because the bathroom on the main level is being remodeled, yes, you told us,” Lexa said with a smile. 

 

Clarke chuckled. “Right. Follow me.” 

 

“Gladly.” She was definitely  _ not _ staring at Clarke’s ass the entire trip up the stairs. Nope. 

 

Two flights of stairs later, Clarke led Lexa down the hall to Octavia’s slash the guest bathroom. Clarke went in first, nearly sighing in relief when she was able to relieve her bladder. She quickly finished and washed her hands before opening the door and letting Lexa in. 

 

“Wait for me?” Lexa said. “I wanted to ask you something.” 

 

Clarke nodded, curiosity piqued. 

 

A few minutes later, Lexa had rejoined her in the hallway and was about to say something, but Clarke interrupted. “Wait, Octavia’s mom is home,” she reminded. “In here.” She pulled the girl into Octavia’s bedroom, closing the door. “She’s nice, but a little nosey.” 

 

Lexa smiled and nodded. “Um, I really just wanted to know what my sister said to you,” she said. 

 

“What do you mean?” Clarke asked, playing dumb. 

 

Lexa gave her a look. “You know what I mean, Clarke. You’ve barely talked to me since you and Anya were left alone for a few minutes. And I know Anya. What did she say?”

 

Clarke shrugged. “Okay, yeah, she did go all big sister on me, but she was just looking out for you.”

 

Lexa looked concerned. “She didn’t say anything about D.C., did she?”

 

Clarke knit her brow. “Just that you’ve been through a lot. She may have also threatened bodily harm if I hurt you.” 

 

“Oh my god,” Lexa groaned. “I’m so sorry. She’s--”

 

“Worried about you,” Clarke finished. “It’s sweet.”

 

Lexa let out a laugh. “It’s not sweet. It’s annoying.”

 

“Is it, though? I wish I had someone to look out for me like that.”

 

Lexa regarded her carefully. “You do,” she said. “Raven and Octavia would protect you the same way Anya would.” 

 

Clarke knew she wasn’t wrong. Her best friends were pretty amazing, even when they were annoying. 

 

“Anyway, I’m sorry about Anya.”

 

Clarke laughed. “You don’t have to be sorry, Lex. I’m glad you have someone looking out for you.” 

 

Lexa gave a single nod and smiled. “Me, too.” She really didn’t know what she’d do without her sister. 

 

“Come on,” Clarke said. “Let’s get back before those idiots let their imaginations run wild.” 

 

“Clarke?”

 

“Yeah?” Clarke said, turning to face Lexa as she stood in the doorway of Octavia’s room. 

 

“Thank you,” Lexa said, stepping towards her. “Just, for being… you. For not pushing.”

 

Clarke smiled. “Of course,” she said. “I hope you trust me someday, enough to open up.”

 

Lexa nodded. “I think I will,” she said. Then she surprised Clarke by closing the distance between them and pulling her into a hug.

 

“Oh,” Clarke said, shocked, and wrapped her own arms around the brunette. But the hug wasn’t unwelcomed. A bit awkward, but definitely not unwelcomed. All too soon (but longer than the timespan of a simple friendly hug), Lexa stepped back and smiled awkwardly at Clarke. “What was that for?” Clarke asked. 

 

Lexa shrugged. “Just felt like it.” She cleared her throat. “We should, ah, get back downstairs.”

 

Clarke nodded, stepping aside to let Lexa lead the way. She took a deep breath as she followed the girl down the stairs, attempting to compose herself. But all it did was give her another whiff of Lexa’s scent, which was a mixture of lavender and something sweet. 

 

She was in so much trouble.

 

Later, once Lexa and Anya had said their goodbyes and left for the night, the remaining three girls got ready for bed. Though, they wouldn’t actually go to sleep for many more hours. 

 

“I thought Lexa was hot, but  _ damn _ ,” Raven said as she created a sleeping pallet using at least six different comforter style blankets on the floor Clarke and Octavia always offered to take the floor to allow Raven to sleep on the plush couch, but the girl insisted the floor was actually better for her spine. “Anya is a total babe in a scary sexy kind of way. I need a cold shower. And was it me or was she flirting with me all night?”

 

“Girl, stop,” Octavia said with an eye roll. “Your thirst is so strong that I thought you were going to drown the poor girl.”

 

Clarke blinked in surprise. She was normally the first to notice and tease Raven for her crushes, just as Raven did to her. But she’d been oblivious the entire night. She’d been too focused on Lexa and Anya’s warning.

 

What the fuck had she missed?

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A HUG! These adorkable idiots. :) Please let me know what you thought! And for those asking, yes, Ranya will be a thing (eventually). Honestly, they will probably always be a thing in my fics because I <3 Ranya so freaking much, even though they never actually met or interacted on the show. (Details.) Anyway, enjoy!
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: Though my name is Lexa, I am short, a natural redhead, and have blue eyes. :)


	4. Mother, Mother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Abby makes an appearance and a promise to Clarke. Plans for the upcoming Spring Break are made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, THANK YOU so much for all the kudos and comments! They mean so much to me, and I am glad you all seem to be enjoying this fic. :)

“I feel hungover,” Raven protested the following morning. It was just after ten in the morning and they’d been up well into the early morning hours. “Is it possible to get a hangover when you don’t drink any alcohol?”

 

“When you eat nearly an entire pizza by yourself, four brownies, and chug five cans of soda, yes,” Octavia said, sitting up on the couch, her hair in a messy bun on top of her head. “Yes, it is.” 

 

Raven groaned and fall back against the pile of blankets and comforters that she’d fashioned into a makeshift mattress on the floor. “I’m never eating pizza again.”

 

“Liar,” Clarke said as she stood up from the second couch and stretched. “You’d have it for breakfast if there was any leftover.” 

 

Raven looked up at Clarke for a moment, then she shrugged. “Probably right. Why are we awake so early?” She cocooned herself in the pile of blankets. They normally slept well past noon after a sleepover.

 

Clarke laughed. “Because some of us actually have things to do,” she said. “My mom wants to have brunch at noon and I’m in desperate need of a shower. I need to go soon so I can look somewhat presentable.” 

 

“You need more than a couple of hours to accomplish that, Griffin,” Raven snarked from her cocoon. 

 

“Says the girl with marshmallow in her hair,” Clarke said. 

 

“What?!” Raven cried, shooting up into a sitting position and reaching up to feel her hair in the messy ponytail. Clarke laughed and Raven glared, grumbling at how not funny Clarke’s joke was. 

 

“Excuse me, I am hilarious,” Clarke countered. 

 

“Also it wasn’t a joke,” Octavia clarified, running her fingers over the glob of dried marshmallow in Raven’s hair. “That’s going to be a bitch to get out, Rae. How the fuck did you manage that? And when did we have marshmallows?” 

 

Raven looked up at Octavia sheepishly and shrugged. “It’s a talent,” she said as she stood, the blanket still cocooning her body. The basement where they always slept during their sleepovers at Octavia’s was always frigidly cold in the mornings. 

 

Clarke quickly gathered her things and said her goodbyes before making her way back to her house to shower and change. Once dressed, she looked at herself in the mirror. Not too bad for only four hours of sleep, she thought to herself. Though, she definitely needed some concealer under her eyes. Yikes. 

 

Abby Griffin wasn’t a bad mom. She was just… distant. Ever since Clarke’s dad had died two years prior, Abby had thrown herself into work. As the head of Cardiothoracic surgery at the local hospital, she took it upon herself to spend most of her waking hours at the hospital, and Clarke was lucky to see her more than a few minutes in a day. She didn’t blame her mother, but she wished that she didn’t have to literally schedule appointments to spend time with her. She was going to be finished with high school and off at college in a little over a year and a half. 

 

Clarke craved a closer relationship with her mother, so she’d jumped at the brunch invitation from her mother. 

 

“You don’t look any worse for the wear,” Abby greeted her daughter, leaning in to kiss her on the cheek when Clarke joined her in the lobby of a nicer cafe that was a favorite brunch spot of theirs. It was nice enough to have actual table cloths on the tables, but not so posh that Clarke couldn’t wear jeans (but not the ones with the ripped knees). “Did you girls actually get to bed at a decent hour last night?”

 

Clarke laughed aloud. “Not even close,” she said. “The wonders of under eye concealer.” 

 

“Ah,” Abby said with a nod. “I only just go here five minutes ago. The wait shouldn’t be too long.”

 

Clarke nodded. “I hope not. I’m starving.”

 

“Not enough junk food last night?” 

 

“Oh, I ate enough to give an elephant a coronary, but I still woke up hungry,” Clarke said. 

 

Abby chuckled. “Enjoy the fast metabolism while you can, kid,” she warned. 

 

The hostess called their name and they were led to a small table near the back of the restaurant. “Your server will be right with you,” the girl said, handing them their menus. 

 

“Thank you,” Abby and Clarke replied at the same time. 

 

Clarke already knew what she was going to order without even opening the menu; she got the same meal of French Toast, two-egg omelette, crispy bacon, and hashbrowns every time they went out for brunch.  

 

“How’s school?” Abby asked as she looked over the menu. Her choice was almost never the same.

 

Clarke bit her lip, holding back a retort that she would know how school was going if she was around more. Instead, she sipped her water. “Fine,” she said. “My portfolio is coming along quite nice. Miss Greer says I’m her top student.”

 

Abby hummed in acknowledgement. Clarke knew her mother wanted her to follow in her footsteps and go to medical school, but Clarke wasn’t sure what she wanted just yet. She wasn’t completely against it. She always did very well in her biology and chemistry classes, and but she also enjoyed her art. 

 

“And your AP Classes?” Abby inquired. 

 

“I have an A in everything,” Clarke supplied. 

 

“But do you like them?”

 

Clarke nodded. “Yeah, I guess.” 

 

Abby raised an eyebrow. “You just guess?”

 

Clarke shrugged. “It’s school,” was all she said. Then a smile crossed her face. “There is a new girl in a few of my classes who’s pretty cool,” she said. “Lexa. Raven and Octavia seem to like her, as well. She and her sister came over to Octavia’s last night.” 

 

“That name sounds familiar,” Abby said. “Have you mentioned her before?” 

 

Clarke thought back to her interactions with her mother over the last week and shrugged. “I don’t think so,” she said. “I just met her on Monday and this is the first time I’ve seen you since.” 

 

Abby looked up in surprise. “It is not,” she protested, astonished at the thought. 

 

Clarke looked up, a confused look on her face. “Yes it is,” she said. “I haven’t seen you since last Sunday when you actually took a day off. You asked if I needed anything from the store before you ran some errands. I was still not feeling well and stayed home.” 

 

Abby blinked, shocked that she hadn’t realized. “Oh,” she said. “Right. We’ve been short staffed this week, so I’ve had to put in some overtime.” 

 

“You always put in overtime,” Clarke said. “It’s whatever, Mom. Can we change the subject?” 

 

Abby nodded and made a split second decision. “I’m taking a vacation,” she announced. 

 

Clarke’s eyes widened in shock. “You’re what?” she asked. Abby hadn’t taken any extra days off in over two years. 

 

Abby nodded. “Your Spring Break is coming up in two weeks and I think we should go somewhere. A week isn’t long enough to travel far, but maybe Coronado?” 

 

“The beach house?” Clarke said. “I thought you sold that after…” she trailed off, not wanting to bring up her dad’s death. “A long time ago,” she finished instead. 

 

Abby shook her head. “I was going to, but I couldn’t bring myself to. We have so many good memories there.”

 

Clarke nodded, a small sad smile growing on her face as she thought of summers spent on the beach with her parents. “Are you sure?” she asked. “It won’t be too… painful?” 

 

Abby nodded. “I’m sure. We should remember the good times and make some new memories. Maybe you can bring Raven or Octavia. Or both.”

 

Clarke broke out into a huge smile. “Okay,” she said. “Let’s do it. I’ll text Raven and Octavia now.” 

 

 

***

 

 

Octavia couldn’t go because her parents were dragging her to San Antonio to attend a family member’s wedding (“Save me, Princess!” Octavia had groaned when she’d shared the news). 

 

Raven, however, could join and was excited for the beach. Clarke was debating inviting Lexa as well, but she wasn’t sure their friendship was at that level just yet. 

 

It turns out that it didn’t matter anyway. 

 

“Anya’s spring break is the same as ours, so we’re going on a road trip,” Lexa said when Raven has asked what her plans were for the break. 

 

“Your sister is really cool,” Raven said, a dreamy look on her face. “Is she gay?” 

 

Lexa raised an eyebrow at Raven’s bluntness. Even after becoming somewhat accustomed to Clarke and her group of friends over the last two weeks, Raven’s outspoken manner still stunned her at times. “What?” 

 

Clarke clamped a hand over Raven’s mouth. “Rae here has a crush on your sister. Do us all a favor and just tell us she’s straight with a longtime boyfriend and shut her up about it already.” Clarke squealed when Raven licked her palm. “Gross,” she said, wiping the saliva on her denim-covered thigh. 

 

“Um,” Lexa started, knitting her brow. “She’s not straight and doesn’t have a boyfriend.” 

 

“Girlfriend?” Clarked asked, praying Lexa would say yes and Raven would have to stop talking her ear off every time they were alone together. 

 

Lexa shook her head. “She’s single.” 

 

Raven grinned. 

 

“But she only dates older women.”

 

Raven’s grin fell. “What?”

 

Lexa shrugged. “She’s got a thing for older women. Last woman she dated was a lawyer in her early thirties. She finds independence sexy, or something like that. I don’t think she’s ever dated anyone younger than her.”

 

A determined look crossed Raven’s face. “There’s a first time for everything,” she said, her grin returning. She reached out and attempted to steal one of Lexa’s fries, but Lexa would have none of that and swatted Raven’s hand away. 

 

“Get your own,” Lexa said, pretending to growl. 

 

Raven just chuckled and stood from their lunch table. “I need to go work on my comp sci project. Bye, bitches!” 

 

As Raven walked off, Lexa looked curiously at Clarke, who just shrugged. “Welcome to the madness that is Raven.” 

 

Lexa shook her head in wonder. 

 

“Where are you road tripping to?” Clarke asked, breaking her out of her thoughts. 

 

“L.A., Santa Barbara, back to L.A., then we’ll finish out the week in San Diego before driving back here on Sunday.”

 

Clarke’s ears perked at San Diego. “Hey, Coronado is in San Diego, just across the bridge.”

 

“Is that where your beach house is?” 

 

Clarke nodded. “You could save some money on a hotel and just stay with us.”

 

Lexa hesitated. “I don’t know,” she said. “What about your mom?”

 

Clarke waved that off. “She won’t care,” she said. “She told me to invite friends.” Well, she’s said invite Raven and Octavia, but she was sure her mother wouldn’t mind. Then a thought crossed her mind. “Just think how fun it’ll be watching Raven flirt with your sister and fail time and time again. Epic.” She emphasized her last word with jazz hands.

 

Lexa laughed aloud at the thought. “Are you sure there’s enough room for us?”

 

Clarke nodded. “Plenty. There are three bedrooms. One is the master suite where my mother will be, but the other two have queen sized beds. Raven and I can double up when you join us, if you don’t mind sharing with your sister.”

 

Lexa shook her head. “Of course not.”

 

A devious look crossed Clarke’s face. “We could always make Raven and Anya share,” she said, grinning. “The awkwardness that would create would be amazing.” Also, she’d get to share a room--a bed!--with Lexa. Maybe they could have some deeper conversations and Lexa could grow to trust her more.

 

Lexa’s eyes widened, realizing that if Raven and Anya shared a room, that meant she’d have to share with Clarke. Share a bed. Oh, yeah. Talk about awkward. And she didn’t mean Raven and Anya. “Uh, no, I don’t think that’s a good idea. My sister can be a heartless bitch in the mornings. I don’t want to subject Raven to that.” 

 

It was weak, Lexa knew, but it was all she could think of. 

 

Clarke shrugged. “Still, it’ll be fun watching Raven strike out. And we’ll get to hang out some more. I like hanging out with you.” She finished with a shy smile. 

 

The corner of Lexa’s mouth rose. “I’ll talk to Anya about it,” she said. “I doubt she’ll say no to saving money since she’s footing most of the bill for the trip. Just, please clear it with your mom first?”

 

Clarke nodded. “I'll ask tonight.” She reached out and took a fry off Lexa’s tray, noting with internal glee that Lexa didn't stop her like she had Raven. She grinned like an idiot as she popped the potatoey goodness in her mouth and chewed. 

 

Octavia caught her eye from across the table and smirked.

 

“What?” Clarked asked. 

 

Octavia shook her head. “Nothing, Princess,” she said, but the look on her face told Clarke that she had figured out Clarke’s blossoming crush on the new girl and they they’d be discussing it later when they were alone.

 

Dammit. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, there you go. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. I have several more written, but I am considering whether I should time jump to Spring Break or write another chapter that covers the time between (it'll likely be mostly filler, to be honest). So, I'll let you guys vote: small time jump (about two weeks) to the Spring Break or another chapter before then? Annnnnnd go! 
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: I teach 2nd grade and I am officially on Summer Break as of 3:10PM yesterday. :)


	5. Off We Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anya interrupts a private moment between Clarke and Lexa, the start of Spring Break, Clarke and Abby recall memories of the Beach House.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love you guys so much! Thank you for all the comments and kudos, once again. :) 
> 
> The votes for skipping ahead to spring break were the clear winner, so here we go. Spring break begins! Enjoy.

The two weeks leading up to Spring Break were full of projects and studying for midterms, which were twenty percent of students’ final grades at Arkadia Charter High School. Clarke and Octavia spent many hours after Octavia’s practices and on the weekend together working on their AP Physics project. Raven was still perfecting her computer science project and studying with Lexa for their AP Stats midterm, which was rumored to be a monster of a test. 

 

Finally, it was the Friday before the break and the dismissal bell rang and hundreds of students hurried towards the exits. 

 

“Spring break, bitches!” 

 

The yell came from Raven as they walked out of the school the Friday leading into their week-long vacation. 

 

“Ugh, don’t remind me,” Octavia grumbled, still bitter she’d be spending the break with her stodgy family in Texas instead of on the beach with her friends. 

 

“We’ll send a postcard, Blakey,” Raven said. 

 

Clarke laughed. “Stop rubbing it in, Rae,” she admonished. “Are you even packed yet?” 

 

Raven shrugged. “I’ll do it tonight,” she said with a dismissive wave. “Bikini, shorts, tank tops. Done.” 

 

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Toothbrush, Rae. Don’t forget your toothbrush. Especially since I have to share a bed with you once Lexa and her sister arrive on Thursday. And we are leaving at 5am tomorrow morning, whether you’re ready or not. In fact, why don’t you just sleep at my house tonight?”

 

Raven gave her a ‘duh’ look. “Uh, I thought that was obvious. Do you really think I’m waking up at 4 in the morning just to get to your place by 5? Hell, no! What’s for dinner?” 

 

“Do you think of anything other than food?” Octavia asked as they made their way across the school parking lot. As the only one of the three of them with a car, Clarke had offered to drive them home since Octavia didn’t have practice and Raven wasn’t staying late to work on any projects that day. 

 

“Yes,” Raven said. 

 

“She thinks about Lexa’s sister, too,” Clarke teased. 

 

Octavia snorted. “Never gonna happen, Reyes,” she said, then took off towards Clarke’s car. “Shotgun!” 

 

“No fair!” Raven called out, following as quickly as she could with her leg. “Cripple rides shotgun!” 

 

Clarke shook her head as the two argued over who would ride in the front passenger seat when a voice pulled her out of her thoughts. 

 

“So, they are always like that, huh?” 

 

Clarke glanced to her right and saw Lexa looking at Raven and Octavia with an amused look on her face. She nodded. “Yep,” she said, popping the ‘p’ sound at the end of the word. Then she looked back at Lexa. “Isn’t Anya supposed to pick you up now?” 

 

Lexa sighed. “She was supposed to, but she got stuck in traffic. That’s code for she left an hour after she meant to.”

 

Clarke laughed. “Nice. Need a ride home? Better to wait there than here.”

 

Lexa nodded. “You’re right. Thanks.”

 

Clarke smirked. “Watch this,” she said, then started towards the burgundy 2015 Nissan Murano that had been her dad’s before he died. “Yo, both of you in the back!” she yelled. “Lexa’s got shotgun.”

 

Both girls instantly stopped bickering, their heads snapping up to look back at Clarke.

 

“Not fair!” Raven cried. “I was here first.” 

 

Octavia scoffed. “No, I was,” she said. But she shrugged. As long as Raven wasn’t up front, she didn’t care. She stepped back and opened the back passenger door and got in, leaving a defenseless Raven alone. 

 

Clarke stared at Raven. “My car, my rules,” she said. “Or you can walk home.”

 

Raven huffed, but rounded the SUV to get in the back on the driver’s side. 

 

“Your chariot awaits,” Clarke said, gesturing grandly for Lexa to get in. 

 

Lexa laughed. “Thank you, madame,” she played along, sliding into the front passenger seat. 

 

On the ride to Octavia’s house, which was the closest to the school, the two girls in the back continued to bicker, but in a way that only amused the two in the front. “Does it really matter which is better?” Clarke asked as she pulled into Octavia’s driveway. 

 

“Of course it matters, Griffin!” Raven exclaimed. “Reese’s is obviously better than a Kit Kat bar.” 

 

“No way!” Octavia protested. “Kit Kats are where it’s at.” 

 

“You’re both delusional,” Lexa said, turning around in her seat and jumping in on the debate. “The best is obviously Twix. Duh.” 

 

Clarke laughed. “Sorry, ladies. I gotta agree with Lex on this one.”

 

“Traiter,” Octavia said as she opened the car door. “We’ll continue this when I get back from Podunk Texas.” 

 

“You’re going to San Antonio, Octavia,” Raven countered. “That’s not--”

 

“Po. Dunk. Texas,” Octavia interrupted, stressing each word. 

 

“Whatever,” Raven said. Then she unbuckled her seatbelt and slid across the backseat to pull Octavia into a hug. “Don’t get bitten by any armadillos, okay? They carry Leprosy and I don’t want to have to shun you.” 

 

Octavia laughed and returned the hug. “And you don’t get eaten by any sharks.” 

 

“Deal,” Raven said. 

 

In the front seat, Clarke cast a knowing look at Lexa. “See? They actually love one another.” She cast another glance at the embracing girls. “Oh my god you’ll see one another in a week.” 

 

“Ten days,” Octavia corrected, finally stepping back. 

 

“It’s not like FaceTime isn’t a thing,” Clarke said loudly. 

 

Octavia rolled her eyes and grabbed her backpack from the floor of the SUV. “See ya on the flip side,” she said, blowing them a kiss and slamming the car door shut. 

 

Clarke backed out and drove Raven home next, who promised to be packed and at Clarke’s house by six that evening. When they were finally alone, Clarke glanced over at Lexa. “Are you excited about your trip?” 

 

Lexa nodded. “It’s the first time we’re traveling without our parents,” she answered. “Anya is excited about saving money on hotels, too. Thank you again for letting us crash at your place. You’re sure your mom is okay with it, right?”

 

Clarke nodded, turning into Lexa’s subdivision. “I’m sure,” she said. “She’s pretty chill. She’ll want to get to know you a bit, but she’ll give us space, too. Have you mentioned Raven’s crush to Anya?”

 

Lexa chuckled. “No,” she said. “I wanted to surprise her.” She glanced at Clarke. “Raven won’t, like, jump her or anything, right?”

 

Clarke laughed. “Not a chance,” she said. “As confident as Raven acts when she’s with us, she’s a total chickenshit when it comes to actually acting on her crushes, particularly with Anya.”

 

“Why particularly with Anya?”

 

Clarke pulled into Lexa’s driveway and put her car into park, then turned to face Lexa. “Um, your sister is kind of scary,” she said. “Intimidating.” 

 

Lexa snorted. “She just puts on that front when she’s with new people. She’s actually a huge softie.”

 

Clarke looked skeptical. “I’m not sure I believe that. I’m kind of nervous, to be honest.”

 

“For Raven?”

 

“For me,” Clarke clarified. “I’m not exactly Anya’s favorite person…”

 

Lexa laughed. “She likes you just fine, Clarke. She was just being protective older sister. She’s not that scary, I promise. Her bark is worse than her bite.”

 

“I don’t want to test that theory,” Clarke said. Then she shook her head. “Anyway, I better get home and finish packing.”

 

Lexa nodded and studied Clarke, carefully considering. 

 

“What?” Clarke asked, suddenly hyperaware of her appearance. Did she have something in her teeth? 

 

Lexa took a deep breath. “I...I think I’m close to telling you about D.C.,” she said, voice barely above a whisper. 

 

Clarke blinked in surprise. “Oh,” she said. Then she licked her lips. “You don’t have to, you know,” she reassured the other girl. “I mean, if you want to, of course I’ll listen, but don’t think you have to in order to keep my friendship.”

 

“I know,” Lexa said. “But, well, I kind of have to because, um…” she trailed off, then shook her head. “I just need to before I can tell you something else.”

 

“I’m so confused,” Clarke said, chuckling. 

 

“I know,” Lexa said, looking conflicted. “I’m sorry. But, it’ll make sense soon. I hope.” 

 

Clarke regarded her carefully. “You’re really cute when you think that hard, Woods,” she said, a teasing lilt to her voice. She smiled across the console. 

 

Lexa’s cheeks turned pink. “Am not,” she muttered. But she met Clarke’s gaze. 

 

Clarke’s eyes dropped to Lexa’s full lips, which the girl wet nervously with her tongue in that second. Clarke felt herself leaning in and--

 

A loud  _ BANG  _ on the passenger window made them both jump and scream. 

 

“Holy shit!” Lexa screeched, clutching her chest when she realized that it was Anya. She gave Clarke an apologetic look. 

 

“We gotta get a move on if we want to make it to L.A. by nightfall” Anya yelled through the closed window. 

 

Lexa opened the door. “You were the one who was late, Ahn,” she said, annoyed that her moment with Clarke had been interrupted. She was almost certain the blonde was about to kiss her. Though, maybe it was a good thing that they’d been interrupted. She really should let Clarke in on the situation before they… did whatever. 

 

“Whatever, let’s go,” Anya said. She glanced at Clarke. “See you on Thursday, Princess.” Then she was gone. 

 

Clarke groaned, cursing Raven for letting the goddamn nickname slip so that Anya had picked up on it. She grumbled under her breath. 

 

“What?” Lexa asked. 

 

Clarke sighed. “Nothing,” she said. Then she smiled. “Have fun and be safe. And message me.” She leaned forward, this time for a hug.

 

“I will,” Lexa said. “I’ll also message you when we figure out what time we’ll be at the beach house on Thursday.” 

 

Clarke nodded and, after taking one last inhale of Lexa’s scent, released the brunette. Lexa exited the car and shut the door behind her, waving as she slid into the front seat of Anya’s older model Honda Civic. Clarke lifted a hand in response, feeling her stomach clench at the thought of not being able to see Lexa for nearly a week. 

 

She knew it was ridiculous, it was only a few days, after all. But she was really going to miss her.

 

 

***

 

 

“Anything before 9am should be illegal,” Raven grumbled she and Clarke slid into the backseat of Abby’s SUV the following morning at 5am. 

 

“School starts at 7,” Clarke pointed out. 

 

“Your point?” Raven murmured, pulling her blanket around her after she’d buckled her seatbelt. 

 

Abby chuckled from the driver’s seat. “You can sleep on the drive,” she pointed out. 

 

“Sleep good,” Raven said around a yawn. 

 

Clarke rolled her eyes and buckled her own seatbelt. “Can we stop at McDonalds for breakfast? I need some hashbrown fuel.”

 

“Hashbrowns?” Raven said, suddenly alert. “Where?” 

 

Abby laughed. “I guess that answers that,” she said, putting the car into reverse and backing out of the garage. 

 

“To McDonalds!” Raven cried out, throwing a fist into the air. 

 

“McDonalds!” Abby and Clarke echoed. 

 

Half an hour after going through the drive thru window, Raven was in a deep sleep, her head propped on a pillow against the window. Her leaning position caused her feet to encroach on Clarke’s half of the backseat. 

 

Clarke was on her phone, cursing the sketchy signal as they drove further and further away from civilization. 

 

The sun was just starting to rise and not many people were on the road yet, which was the main reason they’d left so early. 

 

Signal finally completely lost, Clarke locked her phone and glanced up at her mom. “Mom, can you pull over really quick? I want to move to the front seat so Raven can stretch out.”

 

Abby glanced in the rearview mirror at her daughter. “You don’t want to try and get some more sleep, too?” she asked. 

 

Clarke shook her head. “Not tired,” she said. “The coffee is working.” 

 

Abby chuckled and looked for a place to pull off the road. The highway they were on was relatively desolate, not a town or even a rest stop around for miles. They’d passed a sign a few miles back that read ‘Next services: 41 miles.’

 

After Clarke had moved to the front and settled in, Abby continued on. Raven was quick to claim the entire backseat, twisting in a way that Clarke could never understand how it was comfortable, but Raven didn’t seem to care. 

 

“Do you remember the last time we went to the beach house?” Abby asked after a few moments of silence, the only sound was the Sirius satellite top 40 station turned down low. Adele’s “When We Were Young” was currently playing. How appropriate, Clarke thought. 

 

Clarke nodded. “The week before I started high school,” she said, letting the memories infiltrate her mind. “Dad and I drove out a few days before you could get off work, and you joined us a few days later. You got mad when I accidentally let it slip that he’d let me try wakeboarding.”

 

Abby laughed at the memory. “You were never the most coordinated child, Clarke. I was terrified you’d get hurt.” 

 

Clarke didn’t protest. She wasn’t exactly the picture of poise and gracefulness even today. “I wonder what condition the pool is in,” she mused. 

 

“It’s fine,” Abby said. “I’ve been paying a service to keep the place maintained even though we haven’t been there.”

 

Clarke looked at her mother as the older woman drive. “You have?” 

 

Abby nodded. “Even if we weren’t enjoying it, it didn’t seem right to sell it.” She cast a quick glance at Clarke. “Not yet, anyway.” 

 

Clarke nodded. Then a thought occurred to her. She swallowed a lump in her throat. “Is, uh, is his stuff still there?” 

 

Abby didn’t say anything for a moment, then she sighed. “Yes, Clarke. I haven’t been back since, and it also didn’t feel right to allow a stranger to go through his things.” 

 

Clarke nodded, unsure how she felt about this new information. She was going to be surrounded by her dad’s things once again. She gave her mother a sad smile. “This will be a good opportunity to remember him and figure out what we should keep or donate, then.” 

 

Abby returned her smile and reached over to squeeze her daughter’s hand. “I agree.” 

 

They continued the drive in relative silence, only making a comment here and there about the house or Raven’s snores, or recalling a favorite memory of past trips to the beach house. It was several hours later when Raven finally joined the land of the living, sitting up in the backseat and stretching as she gave a loud yawn. “How much longer until lunchtime?” 

 

Abby laughed at Raven’s food obsession and looked at the girl in the rearview mirror. “Once we get to San Diego, we’ll find food.” They only had another hour or so until they reached San Diego. 

 

Clarke turned in her seat. “I got you covered, Rae. In the front pocket of my bag, there’s some trail mix.” 

 

“I love you,” Raven said, leaning forward to dig in Clarke’s bag. 

 

Clarke rolled her eyes at Raven’s moan of delight when she stuffed a handful of the mix of pretzels, peanuts, chocolate chips, and Chex cereal into her mouth. 

 

After stopping for food at a diner just before they hit the city, they continued on towards Coronado. A knot formed in Clarke’s throat when she recognized many of the streets and buildings on the way. Then she had to blink back tears as the house came into view. She took solace in the fact that her mother was having the same difficulties as she pulled into the driveway. 

 

The beach house wasn’t huge, but it had direct access to a semi-private beach and a small pool in the back. Clarke exited the car and took a deep breath as she stretched. The air had that salty, slightly fishy quality that only an ocean community has, but she relished it and the memories that it brought flooding back. Memories of her dad teaching her how to ride the waves on a boogie board. Memories of her parents holding on her to hands and swinging her back and forth as they walked along the beach. 

 

Clarke didn’t realize that she was crying until Raven’s arms wrapped around her in a comforting hug. She glanced up at her mother and noted that she was struggling as well. Their eyes met and Abby stepped forward to gather them both into a hug. She placed a gentle kiss on Clarke’s temple. 

 

It was going to be okay. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goddammit, Anya! :p 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: I briefly considered dying my hair brown to match Lexa’s, but my wife said she’d divorce me. She was joking. I think.


	6. The Arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven and Abby tease Clarke, a certain duo joins the fun, and a very important walk on the beach...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like a broken record for thanking y'all for all the comments and kudos, but THANK YOU so, so much. It really does keep me motivated to write more :)

LEXA (5:09PM):

_ >> Anya says we should be there around noon on Thursday :)  _

 

CLARKE (5:14PM):

_ >> So, 3pm? _

 

LEXA (5:20PM):

_ >> Sounds about right. I’ll keep you posted as we head that way.  _

 

CLARKE (5:22PM):

_ >> Great! How’s HP World? _

 

LEXA (5:26PM):

_ >> AMAZING!!!!!!! _

 

A picture of Lexa in Hufflepuff yellow and Anya in Slytherin green came through as the ‘dueled’ with their wands in front of The Three Broomsticks. 

 

Clarke grinned like an idiot at her phone. 

 

CLARKE (5:29PM):

_ >> Haha cute! Tell Anya I’m not surprised she’s a Slytherin.  _

 

CLARKE (5:30PM):

_ >> Wait, no don’t tell her that! _

 

LEXA (5:33PM):

_ >> She said “thanks!” And you’re a Gryffindor aren’t you? _

 

CLARKE (5:34PM):

_ >> Duh. What else would I be with a last name of Griffin? So is Octavia. Raven is, of course, a Ravenclaw. Also, Hufflepuff? Really? _

 

LEXA (5:35PM):

_ >> Hey! Hufflepuffs are awesome. Don’t diss the Hufflepuffs.  _

 

CLARKE (5:39PM):

_ >> Wouldn’t dream of it ;)  _

 

LEXA (5:44PM):

_ >> Hey, when we get there, will there be a way for you and I to talk privately? _

 

CLARKE (5:45PM):

_ >> Sure. We can take a walk on the beach. Why? _

 

LEXA (5:48PM):

_ >> I just wanted to talk to you about something.  _

 

CLARKE (5:49PM):

_ >> *Something* something?  _

 

LEXA (5:50PM):

_ >> Yes. If that’s okay? _

 

CLARKE (5:51PM):

_ >> Only if it’s okay with you… _

 

LEXA (5:53PM):

_ >> I think so.  _

 

CLARKE (5:54PM):

_ >> If you change your mind, it’s okay Lex. Trust me.  _

 

LEXA (5:55PM):

_ >> I do. Gotta go. Anya wants to hit up some rides. See you Thursday! [heart eyes emoji] _

 

 

“What are you grinning at, Princess?” Raven’s voice broke her concentration. 

 

“Huh?” Clarke asked, looking up to see Raven and her mother staring at her. “What?” she asked. 

 

“You’ve been smiling down at you phone for a while now,” Raven said. “We were trying to ask you what you wanted to do for dinner. You talking to your girlfriend?” 

 

Clarke gave Raven a ‘shut the fuck up’ face and rolled her eyes. “I don’t have a girlfriend,” she said harshly, not wanting her mother to ask questions. She changed the subject. “I want fish ‘n chips. Is that place down by the boardwalk still here?” 

 

Abby shrugged, watching her daughter carefully. “Not sure, but we can go find out. And who were you talking to?”

 

“No one,” Clarke said. “Let’s go. I’m sure Raven is about to eat her own arm.” She hurried out of the room, stuffing her phone into the back pocket of her denim shorts. 

 

Abby shot Raven a curious glance and Raven shrugged, feigning ignorance. She would definitely tease Clarke later about it, but she wasn’t about to tattle on her best friend to her mother. 

 

Abby knew Clarke was bisexual and had accepted it without thought when Clarke had told her and Jake, just weeks before Jake’s death. They’d hugged their daughter and said it didn’t matter what gender she brought home to them, so long as they treated her right and made her happy. 

 

Abby didn’t care if Clarke had a girlfriend or a boyfriend, but she did care if she was hiding it from her. She knew she would be partly to blame. She’d been too absent lately. But she intended to change that. She had a surprise in store for Clarke. 

 

“When will your other friends be here?” Abby asked once they’d settled at a picnic table in the outdoor eating area of the fish ‘n chips place, food in front of them. “Lexa and, Anya was it?” 

 

Clarke nodded. “Thursday afternoon,” she said around a piping hot french fry. “Anya says around noon, so Lexa figures that means more like 2 or 3.” She smirked. 

 

“I’m looking forward to meeting them,” Abby said. “Lexa is from school, right?” 

 

“And Anya is her older sister,” Raven supplied. “She’s a freshman in college.” 

 

“How did you meet?” Abby asked. 

 

“Lexa was the new girl in my writing class and we were partnered up for a writing assignment,” Clarke explained, struggling not to let it show how much she was taken with the brunette. “She’d just moved from D.C.” 

 

“Well, I’m looking forward to meeting them,” Abby said, taking a sip of her water. “Maybe we can rent a boat this weekend and spend a day on the water.” 

 

Clarke grinned. “We can try wakeboarding.” 

 

“No!” both Abby and Raven said at the same time, causing them all to laugh.

 

“I was kidding, Clarke insisted. “Though, Lexa would probably be amazing at it.”

 

Raven nodded in agreement. “That girl is ripped,” she said. “I wish I had abs like that.” 

 

Clarke rolled her eyes. “You hate exercising.”

 

“Doesn’t mean I can’t wish for effortless abs.” 

 

“You realize that Lexa is involved in two different sports and trains every single day, right?” Clarke pointed out. 

 

Raven shrugged. “Details, Griffin.” 

 

Abby listened on with interest, wondering if Lexa had been on the other end of Clarke smiling at her phone earlier. The way her eyes lit up when talking about her suggested that her theory was correct. She definitely couldn’t wait to meet this girl. 

 

 

***

 

 

Thursday didn’t come quick enough for Clarke. 

 

See, Clarke had come to a decision over the past few days. She had decided that she was going to go for it when Lexa arrived on Thursday. She was just going to tell her how she felt and let her know that whatever it was that she was keeping a secret didn’t matter to Clarke. And then, she was going to kiss Lexa. It was going to be sweet and romantic and she was going to return home with a girlfriend.

 

Yes, that’s exactly what she was going to do. 

 

Things didn’t quite work out that way. 

 

“They’re here!” Raven called out from the living room, causing Clarke’s hands to turn instantly sweaty and her heart to race. 

 

What the actual fuck?

 

She had to force herself not to run to greet them and tackle Lexa. Instead, she calmly walked outside and calmly pulled Lexa in for a way-too-brief hug. 

 

Introductions among Lexa and Anya and Abby were quickly made. 

 

“Thank you for letting us stay here, Dr. Griffin,” Lexa said, ever the polite houseguest. 

 

“Of course,” Abby said, ushering Lexa and Anya in the front door. “And please, call me Abby. Dr. Griffin is way too formal. Clarke, will you show them up to their room?” 

 

Clarke nodded and reached for Lexa’s bag. “Let me take this,” she said, smiling. 

 

Lexa returned her smile and Anya narrowed her eyes at the blonde, but Clarke didn’t notice. 

 

“I can get that for you,” Raven said to Anya, reaching for the taller girl’s duffle bag. 

 

Anya raised an eyebrow. “I got it,” she said, hoisting the bag up and over her shoulder. Raven pouted. 

 

Clarke led them upstairs and into the room that Raven had moved out of that morning. “There’s a shared bathroom across the hall,” she said, pointing to the room in question. “The lock is tricky, so make sure it turns all the way. Raven never knocks and takes really long showers, so make sure you claim the bathroom before she does in the mornings or you’ll be waiting a while and have to use cold water.” 

 

Raven flipped her off but didn’t deny the claim. 

 

“Mom said she’d order some food for tonight,” Clarke continued. “Chinese, Thai, or pizza?” 

 

“Chinese,” Raven voted. 

 

“Fine with me,” Lexa said. Anya nodded in agreement. 

 

“It’s not quite dinnertime yet, but I’ll tell Mom,” Clarke said. “We’ll let you get settled and freshen up if you want. Towels are in the hall closet. You can just meet us downstairs when you’re ready.” 

 

“I call the shower first,” Anya said to Lexa, already digging in her bag. 

 

Lexa rolled her eyes and sat on the edge of the bed. “Thank you, Clarke. We won’t be too long.” 

 

Two hours later, they were full on Chinese food. Raven had, as usual, eaten too much and was groaning every few minutes as she laid on the couch in the living room. “I shouldn’t have eaten that last eggroll.” 

 

“You should have stopped after three,” Clarke pointed out. 

 

“But they were so good,” Raven said, rubbing her very full stomach. 

 

Lexa laughed and stood from her place on one of the armchairs and stretched. “I need to walk off some of this food,” she announced. “And there’s a beach calling my name.”

 

Clarke saw her opportunity. “Me, too,” she said, willing everyone else to stay put. 

 

“That sounds wonderful,” Abby said. “Raven? Anya? Care to join us?”

 

“Can’t move,” Raven said. 

 

“I think I’ll stay here,” Anya said, giving Abby a polite smile. “My ankle is still a bit sore.” She had twisted her ankle a few days prior at Harry Potter World. 

 

Clarke was mentally cursing her mother for joining them, but she couldn’t tell her not to. Sighing, she gave Lexa an apologetic look. Lexa quickly reached out and grabbed her hand, squeezed once in reassurance, and let go before anyone saw. 

 

(Raven saw.) 

 

“We’ll be back in a bit,” Abby said, then ushered Clarke and Lexa out the back door. 

 

Clarke pouted, but managed to cover it up with a deep inhale as they made their way towards the water until the surf washed over their bare feet as they walked. They hadn’t bothered with shoes. As Abby asked Lexa questions to get to know her, Clarke hung back a bit, studying her mother and Lexa. Lexa laughed at something Abby said and the sound made Clarke smile. 

 

She was annoyed she didn’t have the private moment that she wanted with Lexa, but she was also glad that her mother seemed to be taking a quick liking to the brunette. Who wouldn’t? 

 

She’d just have to find another time to talk to Lexa privately. 

 

“That's why your name sounded familiar when Clarke first mentioned you,” Clarke heard her mother say. Interest piqued, she quickened her pace to join Lexa and Abby. “Clarke, did you know that I work with Lexa’s mom?” 

 

Clarke shook her head. “No. You do?” 

 

“Well, kind of,” Abby corrected. “She's an ER nurse at the hospital.”

 

“Oh,” Clarke said. “That's right. You mentioned that she was a nurse. I never made the connection.” 

 

Lexa nodded. “Yeah, I meant to ask where your mom worked but never thought of it as the right time.” Clarke had said her mother was a doctor, but they'd never gotten the chance to discuss it more in-depth. 

 

“Your mother seems very proud of you,” Abby said. “Both you and your sister.” 

 

Lexa looked worried for a moment, wondering if her mother had told the surgeon anything else about her. “Has she mentioned anything about why we moved here?” she asked. 

 

Abby thought for a moment, then shook her head. “I don't think so, no. We've only had a few non-medical conversations.” 

 

Lexa nodded, glancing at Clarke who gave her a concerned look. Lexa smiled in reassurance. it wasn't that she didn't trust Abby to not say anything if she did know, or that she even thought her mother would even bring the subject up to the surgeon when there was no reason for her to. But Lexa was overly cautious these days. She had to find a moment to talk privately with Clarke, the sooner, the better. 

 

 

 

Back at the house, Raven was wishing she hadn’t eaten so much food. That in and of itself wasn’t unusual for her, but she wished it now more than ever. Because she could barely move and Anya was across the room flipping through the TV channels with the remote. 

 

Must. Get. Up. 

 

Groaning, she did just that, standing on unsteady legs enough to hobble over to and sit next to the older girl on the second couch in the room, taking the seat that Lexa had abandoned. 

 

“So, what is the great Anya majoring in?” Raven asked, wincing at her own lack of game. 

 

Anya snorted, never taking her eyes off the TV. “Really? That’s what you’re going with? What’s my major?” 

 

Raven sighed. “Yeah, it was weak,” she admitted. “I’m usually better at this.” Well, kind of. (Not really.)

 

Anya paused in her channel flipping and cast a glance at Raven. “Better at what?” 

 

“Hitting on girls.” 

 

Anya raised an eyebrow. “You’re hitting on me?” 

 

Raven’s eyes widened at her slip of the tongue and she gulped. “Um. No?” 

 

Anya stared at her. 

 

Raven tried to smile, but it faltered when Anya kept staring in that oh so intimidating way. 

 

“Okay, fine,” Raven finally broke. “I was doing a very weak attempt at hitting on you, but I got all nervous and asked the first thing that popped into my mind.” 

 

Anya was quiet for a few seconds, then turned back to the TV. “Pre-Law.” 

 

“What?”

 

“My major,” Anya clarified. She stopped flipping channels when she came across an episode of NCIS. 

 

Raven opened her mouth to say something, then thought better of it. She did so about three times before the older girl sighed and turned to face Raven. 

 

“What?” she asked, both brash and calm. 

 

Raven shook her head. “It’s nothing,” she said. Then she stood again. “I’m going to go take a shower.” She left as quickly as she could. 

 

Anya watched her leave, noticing her pronounced limp and wondering if she’d hurt herself recently, too. She’d have to ask Lexa about it later. 

 

Not that she cared. 

 

She turned back to the TV. 

 

 

***

 

 

“I’m going to head back, girls,” Abby said after they’d been walking for about half an hour. The sun was just starting to set against the ocean backdrop. 

 

Clarke’s mood instantly perked, but she tried not to let it show too much. “Okay, Mom. We won’t go too far.” She nearly choked at the double meaning of her words, but kept her face expressionless. 

 

“Don’t be too long,” Abby said. “I get nervous after dark.” 

 

“We won’t,” Clarke assured her. 

 

And then they were alone. 

 

“Come on,” Clarke said, grabbing Lexa’s hand. “There’s a little rock formation thing up ahead that’s good for watching the sunset.”

 

Lexa didn’t protest, happy to keep her hand intertwined with Clarke’s as they walked. Clarke was right. A formation appeared, small but significant enough to allow them to both sit on and watch the sunset. They never let go of one another’s hands. 

 

This was it, Clarke thought as she ignored the brilliant orange and pink hues of the setting sun, finding Lexa’s profile much more magical. 

 

“Lexa?” 

 

The girl turned to look at her, a stray lock of hair that had escaped her braid fell across her face in the ocean breeze. Clarke reached up and tucked it behind the girl’s ear. 

 

Lexa knew what was happening, what Clarke was about to do. 

 

And she had to stop her. 

 

She really should. 

 

They should have a very important conversation first. 

 

She had to stop her now because she was leaning in. 

 

And Lexa found herself also leaning in.

 

Then she stopped. “Wait,” she said, pressing a hand to Clarke’s shoulder to stop her. “I have to tell you something.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliffhanger. (Am I, though?) The conclusion of this conversation will be posted soon! :)
> 
> And, for those wondering if Abby knew Lexa before this trip, there you go. Not as dramatic as some thought, but an interesting twist that may or may not come up later on. (I honestly don't know if it will... I always have multiple plot lines in my head and which path I follow depends on the response of readers and my own mood when I sit down to write. So, we shall see if the connection between Abby and Lexa's mom arises again in the future.) 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: I dressed up as Leksa Kom Trikru last Halloween. My 14-year-old daughter was Raven Reyes. My job here is done.


	7. The Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa tells Clarke. But how will Clarke respond?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoilery but VERY IMPORTANT note: The contents within this chapter get quite heavy and have semi-graphic descriptions of transphobia, transphobic violence, and sexual assault. (Yes, I know Lexa is not transgender, but this warning will make sense when you read.) Additionally, the perpetrators of said actions were not charged for their crimes and have gone relatively unpunished. If any such material is triggering to you, I would advise skipping most of this chapter. Thank you, LexaRexa.

  _[PREVIOUSLY…]_

 

_ Lexa knew what was happening, what Clarke was about to do.  _

 

_ And she had to stop her.  _

 

_ She really should.  _

 

_ They should have a very important conversation first.  _

 

_ She had to stop her now because she was leaning in.  _

 

_ And Lexa found herself also leaning in. _

 

_ Then she stopped. “Wait,” she said, pressing a hand to Clarke’s shoulder to stop her. “I have to tell you something.” _

 

……………

 

 

Clarke tried to force her heart rate to calm the fuck down, but it was useless. “Is this about D.C.?” she asked, still leaning in towards Lexa. 

 

Lexa nodded. 

 

Clarke gave her a small smile and squeezed her hand. “You don’t have to tell me anything,” she said. “It won’t change how I feel about you.” 

 

“It might,” Lexa said. 

 

“It won’t,” Clarke insisted. 

 

“It might,” Lexa repeated. “Please, just let me explain. I want to. I have to if we're going to… I just have to.” 

 

Clarke nodded. “Okay. Then I’m ready to listen.” 

 

Lexa nodded and took a deep breath. “Okay. The first thing that I need you to know is that I’m fine with myself and everything about me. I don’t have any body issues or anything. Well, not often.” 

 

Clarke knit her eyebrow in confusion. “What are you talking about?” 

 

Lexa turned to fully face Clarke as they sat on the rock. “It’ll all make sense soon. I just really need you to promise me something.”

 

“Anything.”

 

Lexa licked her lips. “No matter what you think or how you feel about me after this conversation, promise you won’t tell anyone.” 

 

Clarke swallowed against the knot in her throat, her mind already thinking up terrible possibilities. She nodded. “This stays between us,” she promised. She placed her free hand on Lexa’s knee in support and reassurance. 

 

Lexa nodded in acceptance and took a deep breath. It was now or never. “When I was born, everyone assumed I was boy.” 

 

Clarke gave her a confused look. “Why?” 

 

Lexa licked her lips. “Because I had penis and testes.” 

 

Clarke blinked, considering her words. Lexa remained silent, letting Clarke process. After a moment, Clarke spoke, carefully choosing her words. “Are you transgender?” she asked, wondering if that was the secret. “Because that wouldn't matter to me.” 

 

Lexa shook her head. “I know it wouldn't,” she said. “I’m not trans. I have two X chromosomes. I am genetically a female. I just happen to also have typically-male reproductive organs.”

 

“How?” 

 

Lexa shrugged. “Some sort of mutation in the womb,” she explained. So far, the blonde seemed to be digesting the revelation quite well. She just hoped she could get through the rest of the story. 

 

“It’s called intersex and is extremely rare, something like five hundredths of a percent of live births, but it happens. When I kept insisting that I was a girl when I was two, my parents took me to a doctor and they did some genetic testing. They realized that I had two X chromosomes and female DNA. I just had some extra equipment as well.” 

 

Clarke hadn’t removed her hand from her knee or let go of her hand, so Lexa took that as a good sign. 

 

“So you still have a,” Clarke began, then trailed off. 

 

“A penis, yes,” Lexa finished. “Ever wonder why I wear such loose pants and tighter tops?” 

 

Clarke gave a small smile. “I had, actually,” she said. She removed her hand from Lexa’s knee, but only to brush away the lock of blonde hair that had fallen in her face. She immediately return it to Lexa’s knee. Her face turned serious. “You said it wasn’t safe,” she started. “In D.C. And that’s why you left.” 

 

Lexa nodded. “Some kids at my school found out.” Her voice cracked and she had to pause and take another deep breath to keep herself from crying. 

 

Clarke let her take the time she needed. 

 

“I got a girlfriend,” Lexa continued a moment later. “The first girl I ever kissed. Costia. I... I didn't tell her at first. About my anatomy. I was too scared, but I also really liked her and she was kind and sweet and made me laugh.” Lexa looked out into the surf for a moment before turning back to face Clarke. “That's why it was important that I told you about all of this, about me, before anything happened between us. Because I wasn't up front last time and it bit me in the ass.” 

 

Clarke nodded, understanding Lexa’s reasoning. “What happened?” she asked softly. She felt her heart clench in her chest and she nearly stopped the conversation because of the look of distress that crossed Lexa’s face, but Clarke also knew that the brunette needed to tell her story. She rubbed her thumb across Lexa’s hand in what she hoped was a comforting gesture. 

 

“Costia and I first met at soccer tryouts. I was helping the coach and the team captain run drills and she was trying out for the varsity team. She was a grade below me but really good. She just barely got cut from varsity and was placed on the JV team, first string. That didn't sit well with her and she was very determined, so she asked me to train with her to help her move up. At the school we were at, you can jump from team to team based on performance. It's a lot like major and minor league baseball.” 

 

Clarke didn't think it was the time to mention that she had no idea how major and minor league baseball worked. Instead, she nodded. 

 

“Anyway, we started training after practices and on weekends and it was obvious she had a crush on me and I developed one on her, as well. Then, one day as we were doing some passing drills, a ball got away from me and hit her in the head. As I was checking to make sure she was okay, she kissed me then I asked her on a date. 

 

“About a month after that date, I decided to tell her,” Lexa said. “Things were getting pretty serious, we were doing a lot of, um, kissing and stuff. And she kept moving her hands down my stomach like she wanted to, you know, do more. And things got… difficult to hide.” At this point, Lexa stared down at her hands, one still clasped in Clarke’s and the other playing with the bottom hem of her own basketball shorts. Her cheeks burned, and she was grateful that Clarke didn't say or do anything in that moment. “I was just going to sit her down and explain, but things didn't go according to plan. I let myself get distracted when she started kissing me. That day was different because I usually wear compression shorts that, while they don't hide everything, but they help, but I needed to do laundry and wasn't planning on a make out session…” She trailed off and sighed. “It was obvious that I wasn't wearing them after a while.” 

 

Clarke squeezed her hand. “I can fill in the blanks,” she said. Lexa gave her a grateful look before continuing. 

 

“Anyway, I tried my best to hide it, but Costia found out about my anatomy in a rather embarrassing way and she wasn't understanding at all.” Lexa felt her shoulders drop at the memory of the girl she'd thought she could trust yelling at her that she was a freak and to get the fuck out of her house. “She wouldn't let me explain and said some rather nasty things before demanding I leave and never contact her again.”

 

“What a bitch,” Clarke spat out, unable to stop the words. 

 

The corner of Lexa’s mouth lifted. “Yeah,” she said. “It gets worse.”

 

Clarke braced herself as Lexa continued. 

 

“The next day in school, I begged Costia to not tell anyone. I had decided by then that she wasn't the girl I thought she was and figured good riddance. Not that it didn't hurt, but I had a lot more at stake.”

 

“Let me guess,” Clarke said, feeling her stomach clench. “She didn't stay quiet.” 

 

Lexa shook her head. “It was too late. She'd already told half the school that I had a dick. Most students didn't care, but it was a private school and many students came from rich white conservative families. The kind that walked around with pro-Trump pins on their bags. The kind that I was afraid to know that I was gay, let alone had a penis. Costia didn't even tell them the truth about how she found out. She told them she walked in on me changing and saw me. Of course, they believed her story over mine. They assumed I was transgender and began bullying me. It started off with the typical name calling and comments in the hallway bullshit, but it quickly escalated. They got ahold of my cell number and messaged me horrible things. They hacked my Facebook and posted about me for everyone to see. My parents tried to get the school to do something but they refused. Said it wasn't their problem. My parents were furious and wanted to take me out of the school but I refused. I refused to let the bastards win. I was already being scouted by colleges and didn't want to screw that up. Soccer is going to pay for college for me. Otherwise my parents will work themselves to death to pay for it and I can't let them do that for me. Not after everything they've already sacrificed for me.”

 

Lexa finally paused and took a breath. Clarke continued running her thumb over the brunette’s hand. 

 

“Then one day, I got jumped.” 

 

Clarke gasped, but didn’t say anything. She waited for Lexa to continue. 

 

“They cornered me after soccer practice in the locker room. I had assisted the coach in putting equipment away, just like I did after every other practice, so that I could stall and wait for the other players to leave before I changed. I never showered at school for the same reason that I don’t shower after gym class here. It was supposed to be empty, but some kids had snuck in. Three boys and two girls. They, um, surprised me as I was changing my shirt. They surrounded me and began taunting me, asking how I’d paid for my tits and saying that I was in the wrong locker room and that it wasn't fair that I was playing on the girls’ teams.” 

 

Clarke felt her eyes water and the knot in her throat grow as she listened to Lexa’s story and heard the pain in the her voice. 

 

“Then they started hitting me.” 

 

Clarke made a pained noise. “Lexa, you don’t have to--”

 

“I do,” Lexa interrupted, lifting her eyes to meet Clarke’s. The words were harsh, but Clarke knew it wasn’t directed at her. “I need you know, Clarke. I have to… I just have to.”  

 

Clarke nodded. She'd never seen Lexa’s eyes so stone cold before. 

 

“I tried to run out of the locker room, but it was one against five. Next thing I know, I’m on the ground and they’re all kicking me. One kid kept kicking me in the groin and screaming that I didn’t deserve to have a working dick. They, um, they had a pair of scissors and cut off my shorts. I was wearing the compression shorts underneath and they cut those off, too. I finally managed to kick one of them in the knee and make him fall, but that only angered the others and they started kicking me again. That's when someone finally heard me and called the coach in to stop them, but the damage was done.” 

 

“Damage?” Clarke asked, scared to know. 

 

Lexa nodded. “Two broken ribs, broken nose, busted lip, more bruises than I could count, and, um, trauma in my, um, groin.” 

 

Clarke winced at the thought, sucking in a quick breath.

 

“I’m fine now,” Lexa reassured. “No permanent damage, but it took a while before things were… normal.” 

 

Clarke just nodded, understanding how hard it was for Lexa to tell her this. All of the new information swirled in her mind, clashing with the intense anger she felt at the kids who’d put Lexa through all that pain. “What happened to the kids that jumped you?” Her voice shook with emotion.

 

Lexa laughed bitterly. “Oh, you mean the two Republican Senator’s sons and their friends?” She shook her head. “Slap on the wrist and a week’s suspension from school.” 

 

Clarke seethed. “That’s it?!” 

 

Lexa nodded. “Hence why it wasn’t safe,” she whispered. “My parents wanted to press charges, but the police basically said their hands were tied because the kids were their boss’ boss’ boss’ kids. I was a nothing scholarship kid at a private school that was home to many diplomats’ kids. That's why my parents insisted on a public school when we moved here.”

 

Clarke couldn’t take it anymore and abruptly stood. Lexa felt her stomach clench at the prospect of Clarke walking away from her--from  _ them _ . 

 

But Clarke didn’t walk away. Instead, she moved to stand directly in front of Lexa and wrap her arms around her in the tightest hug she’d ever received. She felt Clarke shake. 

 

Lexa let herself be enveloped in Clarke’s hug. She let herself cry into Clarke’s neck. 

 

She let herself let go, something she hadn’t done since the attack. 

 

Clarke murmured into her hair. Lexa couldn't make out what she was saying but it didn't matter. 

 

They stayed like that for several moments, long after Lexa had stopped sobbing and Clarke had loosened her arms a bit, but not let go. She could feel a damp spot on her shirt from Lexa’s tears, but she didn't care. It didn't matter. Nothing but the brunette mattered in that moment. Nothing but showing her how much she cared mattered. 

 

Finally, Clarke took the smallest of steps back, just enough meet Lexa’s eye in the faint light of the nearly full moon, the sun having fully set long ago. She hooked her index finger under Lexa’s chin to get her to look up. When their eyes met, a thousands unspoken words filtered between them. Clarke couldn't hold back any longer. 

 

She kissed her. 

 

Lexa was surprised by the suddenness of the kiss and it took a moment for her to respond, but when she did, she melted into Clarke’s arms, her hands coming up to perch on the blonde’s cheeks. Clarke stepped even closer, her hands tightening on Lexa’s waist. The kiss was soft and sweet and a little bit sloppy thanks to their emotional state, but it was perfect.

 

Clarke pulled back just slightly after a moment and met Lexa’s gaze to make sure this was alright. Lexa answered her unspoken question by gripping Clarke's cheeks and pulling her in for another kiss, this one deeper than the first. As soon as their lips met a second time, Clarke lost all ability to think about anything other than Lexa. 

 

Lexa’s lips against her own. Lexa’s hands on her cheeks. Lexa’s waist beneath her hands. Lexa’s tongue as their lips parted at the same time to explore. 

 

The whimper that Lexa made--or was that herself?--was barely audible over the surf and caused Clarke’s knees to weaken. 

 

Fuck, this was even better that she'd imagined. 

 

She'd only kissed two people in her life, both of them boys. Both had paled in comparison to kissing Lexa. Seriously, both were ghostly white in comparison. 

 

Lexa was soft and tasted like the chocolate ice cream they'd had for dessert. 

 

Feeling Clarke’s unsteadiness, Lexa broke their kiss, causing Clarke to groan in protest. That made Lexa smile as she met clarke’s gaze. She licked her swollen lips. She was about to say something when a ringtone cut through the air. 

 

Clarke’s phone buzzed in her back pocket, the ringtone just barely audible above the crashing waves. Sighing, she stepped back and gave Lexa an apologetic look as she pulled the phone out of her pocket. 

 

It was her mom. 

 

Clarke winced, suddenly realizing how long they'd been gone. “Hi, Mom,” she answered, reaching a hand out to Lexa. “We’re just heading back now.” Lexa grabbed her proffered hand and jumped off the rock. 

 

“Yes, Mom,” she heard Clarke say. “I know, I'm sorry. We got caught up in… looking for sea glass.” 

 

Lexa smirked at that lie, knowing Abby would also see right through that one. 

 

“We’ll be back in ten minutes,” Clarke said, then ended the call. She pocketed the phone and gave Lexa a sheepish look. “Oops?” 

 

Lexa gave a small smile and grabbed Clarke’s hand, squeezing it. Her face turned serious. “Thank you, Clarke.” 

 

Clarke just gave Lexa's hand a return squeeze, then they headed back to the house in a comfortable silence. They still had a lot to discuss, but for Clarke, it was simple. She liked Lexa. A lot. Nothing had changed how she felt. 

 

If anything, her feelings had intensified. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, there you have it. I hope that I managed to do this conversation and, ahem, the kiss scene justice. I am extremely nervous about this very important conversation. Please let me know what you think.
> 
> Also, did you really think Clarke would be anything less than amazing?
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: A few people who know that I am 32 years old asked how I have a 14-year-old daughter. Story time: No, I was not a teen mother (no judgement to those who are/were). My wife’s first wife died giving birth to their daughter, who is now technically my step-daughter. I have since legally adopted her, and she is my daughter, no ‘step-’ needed. My wife is 8 years older than I am, and she was 26 when our daughter was born. :)


	8. Heart-to-Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Many different heart-to-heart conversations: Clarke and Abby, Lexa and Anya, Clarke and Raven, & Clarke and Anya.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all. I just wanted to take a quick moment to tell you all how much I appreciate and adore each and every one of you and make a statement about the last chapter. 
> 
> Many people commented on the last chapter about how much of an injustice it was that Lexa’s attaches were never prosecuted and were let off essentially Scott free. I agree wholeheartedly. I actually drew bits of Lexa’s experience from my own past experience (I'm not intersex, but I was assaulted because of my sexuality when I was in high school in a similar manner and the perpetrators were never prosecuted). Writing Lexa’s description of her attack was simultaneously the hardest and most cathartic thing I've ever written. But I have an advantage in this story because I can change the outcome. 
> 
> Many of you asked if anything was going to happen to the bastards that attacked Lexa and, upon thinking about it, I decided that yes, something will go down. But I will not reveal what just yet (especially since I'm not 100% sure myself). But Raven will likely play a large role. That said, I need Raven to become privy to Lexa's situation first. That I do have planned and will happen soon. (Don't worry; we all know Raven is also a precious cinnamon roll and will react with nothing but positivity and support.) 
> 
> Anyway, thank you for reading and please know that I love and support each and every single one of you lovely readers. 
> 
>  
> 
> Always,
> 
> LexaRexa

Abby was on the back deck when they got back to the house, waiting for them. 

 

“We’re so sorry,” Lexa said as they climbed the stairs. “We lost track of time and--”

 

Abby interrupted. “No worries, dear,” she said with a dismissive wave of the hand. “I wasn’t too worried, but I wanted to talk to Clarke about something I found.”

 

“Something you found?” Clarke echoed, confused. 

 

Abby nodded. “As I was going through some things upstairs.” 

 

Oh. Clarke swallowed, wondering how many more emotional conversations she could handle in one night. 

 

“I’ll just be inside,” Lexa said, giving Clarke one last look before retreating into the house. 

 

“Let’s sit,” Abby said, settling on the top stair of the deck. 

 

Clarke joined her mother on the stair, staring out into the inky darkness of the ocean. The night was quickly becoming chilly and Clarke was wishing she’d brought a hoodie out with her. She shivered a bit. 

 

“I found something in the nightstand drawer and I thought you might want it,” Abby said quietly. 

 

Clarke looked over at her mother, then down at the item she held in her hands. Clarke inhaled sharply. “Dad’s watch,” she said. Abby handed the silver watch to Clarke, who took it and felt the weight of the cold metal in her hands. “It still works,” Clarke mused, watching the second hand tick. “Why is it here?” Clarke asked. 

 

“He left it here the last trip we made,” Abby explained. “We got about halfway home and he noticed. He wanted to turn around, but you had your first day of high school the following day and it was already getting late.”

 

The memory clicked in Clarke’s mind. “That’s right,” she said, chuckling. “He was annoyed because you said no.” Clarke looked up at her mother. “He was supposed to call the cleaning company to see if they’d mail it to us.”

 

Abby nodded. “He never did,” she said. “Then a few weeks later…” she trailed off and watched Clarke slide the watch onto her wrist and close the clasp. It was way too big, of course. “We can get it resized if you want to wear it. I understand if you don’t, though. You could just keep it in your room.”

 

Clarke shook her head. “No, I want to wear it,” she said. “Can we get it done this weekend?”

 

“Of course,” Abby said. She smiled and placed her arm around Clarke’s shoulders, pulling her in for a side hug. 

 

Clarke rested her head on her mother’s shoulder. “Thank you,” she said. 

 

Abby kissed her forehead. “Of course,” she said. They sat like that for several moments before Abby pulled back and smiled down at her daughter. “Now, are you going to tell me what really made you lose track of time? Because I don’t see any sea glass.”

 

Instead of looking embarrassed or shy, Clarke looked pensive. “We were talking about why her family left D.C.,” she explained, casually leaving out what had happened  _ after _ that conversation. “It’s a pretty heavy subject, and it’s not my story to tell, so please don’t ask me.” She said it carefully so as not to disrespect her mother, but also to emphasize the seriousness of the subject. 

 

Abby studied her daughter and noted the emotions that crossed her face as she spoke. “Okay,” she said. “But I’m here to talk if you need to. I promise I’m going to be around more.”

 

“Okay,” Clarke said, not sure if she really believed her mother. 

 

“I am,” Abby insisted. “In fact, I have a surprise for you.” 

 

“Another one?” Clarke asked, playing with the watch that was currently on her wrist. 

 

Abby nodded. “It’s not a tangible item,” she said. “I had a meeting with Chief Jaha just before we left and I told him that I’m stepping down as Head of Cardio.” 

 

“You’re what?” Clarke asked, shocked. Her mother lived and breathed that job. 

 

“I'm stepping down as Head of Cardio,” Abby repeated. “I'll still be a surgeon, but I'll have less responsibilities and more time to spend at home.”

 

Clarke’s head spun from the announcement. “What made you decide this?” she asked. 

 

“Brunch.”

 

Clarke knit her eyebrow in confusion, asking a silent question of clarification. 

 

“At brunch a few weeks ago, you pointed out that we hadn't seen one another in over a week.” Abby paused and shook her head. “That made me realize how much I've been missing with you, and I don't want to miss anything else. You'll be a senior next year, then off to college and doing your own thing. I've missed too much already, Clarke.”

 

The blonde stared at her mother for a long moment, then hugged her tightly. She just barely kept herself from crying due to the incredible range of emotions she'd been subjected to over the past hour. 

 

She'd felt giddy/nervous excitement when her and Lexa nearly kissed the first time, then extreme rage when Lexa had told her about D.C. She'd felt the strongest wave of protectiveness she'd ever experienced shortly after, then back to giddy excitement when they'd finally kissed.

 

Talking with her mom had started new emotions, sadness about her father followed by happy memories. 

 

Now it was relief. Relief that her mother was finally going to be there. Finally going to be her mom again. 

 

Abby, sensing Clarke’s overwhelmed state, pulled back and looked at her daughter closely. “Are you okay?” she asked, a serious note to her voice. 

 

Clarke nodded. She really was. “I'm good,” she replied. “Really good.” She couldn't keep the smile off her face at the thought of Lexa. 

 

“Anything you want to tell me about you and Lexa?” 

 

Clarke feigned innocence (badly). “Whatever are you talking about?” she asked. 

 

“Uh huh,” Abby said, putting her arm back around Clarke's shoulders and staring off into the dark water once again. “Just, promise me that you'll keep me informed if things get serious.”

 

Clarke nodded, no longer trying to hide anything from her mother. “I will. I don't really know what's going on between us, but I know that I really like her and I'm pretty sure she likes me.” 

Especially if their kiss was any indication. 

 

But she wasn't about to tell her mother that. 

 

Abby smiled. “I like her, too,” she said. 

 

Clarke wasn't one of those teenagers who only dated people their parents hated. In fact, Abby’s approval of Lexa greatly pleased her. She returned her mom’s smile and leaned her head on Abby’s shoulder once more. “Yeah, she's pretty great, isn't she?” 

 

Upstairs, a pair of sisters were also having a meaningful conversation. 

 

“I told Clarke.” 

 

The words were so soft that Anya wasn’t sure that she heard her sister correctly. She paused in her task of rooting around in her duffle bag to find clean shorts and tank top to sleep in and looked up. Lexa sat on the edge of the bed, her hands fiddling with the hem of her shirt. 

 

“You what?” Anya asked. 

 

Lexa licked her lips nervously, knowing how protective Anya was of her. She finally lifted her gaze to meet her sister’s gaze. “I told Clarke,” she repeated. “About D.C. and why we had to leave. About me.” 

 

Anya let go of the tank top she had clasped in her hand and moved to sit on the bed next to Lexa. “Are you sure that was wise?” she asked, concerned. She felt her protective big sister switch instantly flip into the ‘on’ position. 

 

Lexa immediately nodded. “Yes,” she replied. “Clarke is different.”

 

“How can you be sure though?” Anya asked. “I’m not saying she’s not and that it was a mistake, but, how do you know she won’t be like…” she trailed off, not wanting to bring up such a difficult subject. 

 

“Like Costia?” Lexa finished. 

 

Anya nodded slowly. “Yeah,” she said. “You thought you could trust her, too.” 

 

Lexa swallowed. “I know,” she said. “But Anya, I really like Clarke. I can’t keep hiding this piece of myself if I ever want to move on and be happy with someone. I don’t know if she’s  _ the one _ yet, but I can’t live in fear and miss out on something just because I’m afraid. I trust Clarke.” She smiled then. “And she was amazing about everything. And then she kissed me, Ahn. After I'd told her everything, she still kissed me.”

 

Anya considered Lexa’s words and the dreamy look currently on her face for a moment, then reached out and grabbed one of her hands, squeezing tightly. “Do I need to have a ‘what are your intentions with my little sister’ talk with Clarke?” 

 

“Don’t you dare,” Lexa growled. 

 

Anya laughed. “Relax, kid,” she said, then she turned serious once more. “But seriously, Lexa. Be careful. I don’t want to see you hurt, physically or emotionally.” 

 

“I know,” Lexa said. “Really, Clarke is a good person. You should have seen how angry she got at what happened to me. She went into full protective mode, just like you.”

 

Anya sighed. “Look, if you feel like you’re ready to be with someone, okay. Clarke seems okay from what you’ve told me. But I’m still going to worry about you.” 

 

Lexa rolled her eyes. “Of course you are,” she said. “But I don’t think you need to.” 

 

Anya scoffed. “I always will, kid,” she said, ruffling Lexa’s hair. 

 

“Hey,” Lexa said, squirming away from Anya. “I’m not a kid, you know.” 

 

Anya laughed and grabbed some clothes from her bag as she stood. “Whatever you say, kid.” 

 

 

 

*** 

 

 

“You kissed her?!” 

 

“Shhh!” Clarke hushed Raven. “Indoor voice, Reyes.” It was late and everyone else had gone to bed. Lexa and Anya had gone first, exhausted from their drive. Clarke correctly assumed that most of Lexa’s exhaustion was due to their emotional conversation out on the beach. Abby hadn’t lasted much longer and bid Clarke and Raven goodnight.

 

Clarke and Raven had soon gone up to their room and gotten ready for bed, but they were far from ready to fall asleep. Instead, they lay on their respective sides of the bed, lights out as they talked. Raven had immediately began asking questions about what had happened on the beach after Abby had returned. Clarke tried to pretend that nothing had happened, but Raven hadn’t bought it for a second. 

 

“We kissed a bit and then my mom called,” Clarke said in a low voice. “After we had a pretty serious conversation.” 

 

“Oh my god. Was there tongue? Did you get to feel her up? Dude, did you do it on the beach?!”

 

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Seriously, Rae?”

 

Raven just looked at her expectantly. 

 

Clarke sighed. “Yes, there was tongue. No, no one felt anyone up, and what the hell? Of course we didn't have sex on the beach. Do you know how gross that is?” She shuddered at the thought of sand in places sand should never, ever be. 

 

“What was the conversation?” Raven asked. 

 

Clarke shook her head. “It’s not my story to tell,” she said. “And please don’t pester Lexa about it. Or the kiss.”

 

Raven sighed, but let it go for now. “So are you girlfriends now?”

 

Clarke shrugged. “We haven’t had a chance to discuss any of that.”

 

“But you like her,” Raven said. “And I can tell she likes you, too. Like, a lot. Like, girl has some serious thirst for Clarke Griffin.”

 

Clarke snorted. “Please,” she said. “If anyone has major thirst, it’s you. Can’t you go two minutes without lusting after Anya?” 

 

“Anya likes me, too,” Raven insisted. “She just doesn’t know it, yet.”

 

“Uh huh,” Clarke said, rolling onto her back. “You just keep telling yourself that.”

 

“I will.”

 

“Goodnight, Thirst Queen.”

 

“Goodnight, Princess.” 

 

But Clarke laid there for a long while, going over the scene on the beach in her mind, from Lexa’s gut-wrenching story to their long-awaited kiss. Then she smirked into the darkness. In all honesty, how ‘long-awaited’ was that kiss? Really? They’d known one another less than a month in the grand scheme of things. 

 

But it felt like much longer than a month to Clarke. She felt like she’d known Lexa for a lifetime. 

 

Clarke glanced over towards Raven, whose light snores suggested that she was out like a light. Girl could sleep like nobody’s business. If there was one thing Raven liked more than food, it may just be sleep. 

 

Chuckling, Clarke carefully slid out of bed, intending to get some water from the kitchen. She stood in front of the back door, looking out at the surf lit only by the moonlight as she drank her water. 

 

Glancing at the time, she saw that it was not even midnight, yet she was the only one still awake. 

 

Or so she thought. 

 

“Oh, hey,” a voice startled her, nearly making her drop her bottle of water. 

 

“Shit!” Clarke let out, clutching her chest with her free hand as she turned. Anya stood at the island, watching her with an amused expression. “Jesus, Anya. You nearly gave me a heart attack.” 

 

Anya gave a small shrug. “Sorry,” she said in a way that told Clarke that she wasn’t sorry in the slightest. 

 

Clarke took another sip of cold water to calm her nerves. “What are you doing up?” she asked. “I thought you and Lexa passed out hours ago.” 

 

Anya nodded and moved to grab her own water from the refrigerator. “I did,” she said. “But I woke up and my ankle hurt again, so I needed water to take the Advil your mom gave me earlier.” She held up the pill in her hand to show Clarke. 

 

Clarke nodded and watched as the older girl placed the Advil in her mouth, took a swig of water, then threw her head back to swallow the medicine. 

 

“I’m sorry that your ankle is hurt,” Clarke said, trying to make nice with Lexa’s older, and very intimidating, sister. 

 

Anya shrugged. “It’s fine,” she said. “I’ve had worse. Shouldn’t you be sleeping?” 

 

Clarke raised a single eyebrow. “Why? It’s not a school night,” she joked. 

 

But Anya didn’t laugh. Or even crack a smile. Damn. 

 

“I heard you had a pretty intense conversation with my sister earlier,” Anya said instead. 

 

“Oh,” Clarke said, her smile fading. “She, ah, told you about that?” She wondered if Lexa also told Anya about the kissing.

 

Anya nodded. “She said you were okay with everything and even got mad at what happened.”

 

Clarke nodded. “Of course I did,” she said. “How it was handled by the authorities was so beyond wrong. I can’t believe they went unpunished.” 

 

Anya’s eyes flashed with rage and her jaw clenched, but Clarke was fairly certain that it was directed at the bastards who carried out their crimes on Lexa instead of at Clarke. Well, Clarke hoped, anyway.

 

“Welcome to the political underbelly of America,” Anya muttered, then she straightened. “I wanted to go after the stupid fucks and break their kneecaps, but Lexa wouldn’t let me. She just wanted everything to go away.” She gave Clarke her most intimidating look. “Now you understand why I warned you about not hurting my baby sister.”

 

Clarke immediately nodded. “I do,” she said. “I get it. And I won’t. Hurt her, I mean. Not intentionally.” She swallowed against the lump in her throat. “I, ah, I really like her,” she said, voice uneven. “She's smart and funny and just an amazing person, especially after all she's gone through. I respect her.” 

 

Anya narrowed her eyes at Clarke, taking careful note of the smile that played upon her lips. She sighed. “Alright, alright,” she groaned out. “I get it, Princess. You have a hots for my sister. Just, remember what I said, okay?” 

 

Clarke nodded. “I will.”  

 

Anya gave a single, sharp nod, then turned to head back upstairs. But she paused at the bottom step. “Hey, your friend, Raven. Did she hurt herself?” 

 

Clarke gave a confused look. 

 

“She was limping earlier,” Anya explained. “I was just wondering if there's something in the water that causes people to get hurt around here.”

 

Was that… a joke? From Anya Woods? 

 

Clarke was momentarily stunned. “Oh, uh, no,” she said. “It's a permanent thing. You'll have to ask her if you want the story.” 

 

Raven  _ so _ owed her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love you all. <3
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: A few people requested the story of how my wife and I met, so if you’re interested in that, read on. If you’re not, I totally understand. :) 
> 
> Claire, my now-wife, was a single mom (see previous fun fact of the day) and needed a live-in nanny for her then 5-year-old daughter after school for a few hours every day and the occasional weekend. She was 30 and a professor of film studies at a nearby university (not the same one I was attending) and I was 22 and a senior in college working towards my bachelor’s degree in early childhood education and needed a place to live (my roommate that I shared an apartment with had graduated the prior year) and some cash. Next thing you know, I’m living in their finished basement and a year later, Claire and I were engaged and I was working at the same elementary school that our daughter was attending first grade.


	9. Let's Boogie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to hit the beach! Ranya have an important conversation. Bikinis. Lots of bikinis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all! (I'm originally from Georgia so yes I say y'all). Thank you so much, as usual, for all the kudos and comments. Y'all (lol) are amazing! 
> 
> Quick note about this chapter: this is the first time I'm posting from my phone so hopefully there are no issues with formatting. =/ 
> 
> ALSO! I can't believe I've not said this before, but you can find me on tumblr at lexarexa.tumblr.com where I reblog a lot of Clexa shit, post about my quirky family, and post fun facts about my writing :)

Friday morning was spent walking along the boardwalk and exploring the touristy parts of the island. Clarke and Lexa managed to brush hands more times than they could count while still being stealthy. (Or so they thought. All three of their companions saw them at one point or another.)

After lunch, it was time to hit the beach. Clarke looked at her reflection in the full length mirror on the back of the bedroom door, gnawing her lower lip. She’d never really cared about her beach attire before. She was never trying to impress anyone in the past. But this time? It was different. This time, Lexa would be there.

Her suit wasn’t super skimpy like Raven’s (seriously, was that red number made with freaking dental floss?), but it was a bikini. It was solid aquamarine in color, and the top piece had underwire that held her boobs in place so they wouldn’t fall out if a wave hit her at the wrong angle (she’d learned that the hard way last summer when she’d accompanied Octavia’s family to Santa Monica and had some serious boob-related issues with her non-underwire bikini top). The bottoms were a simple boyshort cut, the sides in a criss cross design that gave peeks of her hipbones.

She suddenly wished she tanned easier instead of the burning she was more prone to. And that she had more muscle definition in her stomach, which was flat but untoned.

Oh, well. It was the only suit she brought (or even owned), so fuck it. She slid on her cover up and grabbed her towel. Here goes nothing. As she walked down the stairs to join the others out back, she wondered what Lexa’s swimwear was. Would be opt for fuller coverage or would those perfect abs be on full display?

Well, damn. Abs. Yep. There they were.

Lexa stood near the stairs of the back deck, towel draped casually around her neck and sunglasses perched on her nose. She wore a simple black bikini top (no underwire, Clarke noticed with a smirk) and looser black and white Hawaiian-style floral printed board shorts that fell to mid-thigh and sat low on her hips.

But those abs. Hot damn.

Lexa was actually trying to kill her, Clarke figured. She knew that Lexa knew that she had a thing for her abs, even though they always pretended that Clarke didn’t know that Lexa knew. But even Raven and Octavia knew.

Clarke blinked and shook her head quickly to refocus herself. “Where’s Anya?” she asked, noticing that she was the only one missing.

Lexa looked up and started to say something, but her words got caught in her throat when she saw Clarke. Even though she was wearing a cover up, the white material was sheer and the fabric stopped several inches shy of mid-thigh. “Um, she uh...” Lexa cleared her throat. “She had to call her roommate to make sure things were okay at their apartment,” she explained. “Apparently there was some sort of kitchen fiasco involving a lot of smoke and firefighters. She’ll join once she’s assessed the damage, but it’ll be a while.”

“Yikes,” Raven said. Clarke nearly laughed aloud when she saw the pout on her friend’s face at the knowledge that Anya wasn’t going to be joining them any time soon.

Everyone made their way towards the water, but Clarke hung back a bit, which prompted Lexa to do the same.

“Hey,” Lexa said once everyone else was far enough away to not overhear them.

“Hey yourself,” Clarke said. She knew she was grinning like a damn fool, but she couldn’t stop herself.

“So, um, we should probably try to find some time to talk,” Lexa said. They had slowed to a stop and were now facing one another, standing closer than just friends would, but also not touching.

Clarke nodded. “Yeah,” she agreed, hoping that ‘to talk’ was a good thing and not a bad one. She wanted ‘to talk’ to tell Lexa that she wanted the brunette to be her girlfriend, but she was also scared that ‘to talk’ could be Lexa’s way of saying she wasn’t ready. Clarke wouldn’t blame her if she wasn’t ready. She could only imagine the emotional toll the incident in D.C. had taken on her and her willingness to jump into a relationship. But Clarke had already thought of that and had already decided that she was going to tell Lexa that she would wait until she was ready.

“We could go for another walk,” Lexa said. “After dinner?”

Clarke shook her head and pointed off to the distance over the ocean. “There’s a storm moving in,” she said. “It will have rolled in by then.”

Lexa bit her bottom lip, unknowingly torturing Clarke. “Right.”

Clarke thought. The house was too small for them to find a private nook anywhere without the chance of being interrupted. Then an idea popped into Clarke’s head. “Do you think Anya would be willing to hang out with Raven after my mom goes to bed?” she asked.

Lexa raised an eyebrow. “What exactly are you suggesting?”

“Well, since my mom’s room is on the main level, I was thinking me and Anya could switch rooms for the night?” She rushed to correct herself when she saw Lexa’s eyes widen. “I don’t mean for the entire night,” she said. “Just for an hour or two? My mom goes to bed around ten. We could talk and… whatever.”

Whatever. Really, Clarke?

Lexa cleared her throat. “I’m sure Raven will agree, but I don’t know about Anya. I’ll ask, though. I should be able to convince her. I think.”

Clarke grinned and, after checking to make sure no one was paying them any attention, she reached out and gripped Lexa’s hand in both of hers, her thumbs rubbing softly across her knuckles. She was momentarily distracted by the brunette’s long, slim fingers, but she quickly recovered. “I just want you to know that nothing has changed about my feelings in the last twenty-four hours.” She gave Lexa’s hand one last squeeze, then let go and stepped back. “Ready to ride some waves?”

Lexa grinned. “Let’s boogie,” she said, taking off towards the water.

Clarke groaned at the pun, but laughed and ran after her. Abby had already set up a giant blanket and a beach umbrella and was lying in the shade with a book, sunglasses perched on her nose. Raven had waded out to waist-deep water and was now floating on her back. Clarke knew the girl loved water because it made her feel weightless and her leg didn’t bother her.

Lexa spent the next hour trying to teach Clarke how to stand on the boogie board as they rode the waves in, Abby keeping a careful eye because she knew just how much of a klutz her daughter was. But she was also determined.

“Don’t lean back so far,” Lexa coached her after Clarke fell--yet again--after only a few seconds on the small board. “You have to find the right balance.”

Clarke huffed and pushed a wet lock of hair out of her eye. “Why can’t I be naturally good at everything like you?”

Lexa laughed. “I’m shit at anything artistic,” Lexa countered. “Why can’t I draw as good as you?”

Clarke considered that for a moment, then sighed. “I still wish I could be good at something athletic. Basketball, softball, volleyball… Why are athletes so obsessed with balls?” She didn’t even realize what she’d said and the effect it could potentially have on Lexa until the words were out of her mouth.

But Lexa just laughed and shook her head. “Good question,” she said. She was about to say something else when she caught sight of Raven walking up the beach towards the house. “Hey, where’s Raven off to?” she asked, pointing in her direction.

Clarke looked up and grew worried when she saw what Lexa meant. The girl had been riding the waves with them, making snarky retorts at Clarke’s many, many failed attempts at standing on the board. They made their way towards the beach where Abby still sat beneath the umbrella. “Is everything okay with Raven?” she asked.

Abby looked up and smiled. “Bathroom break,” she said. “Though, I have a feeling it’s more related to your sister, Lexa.”

Clarke chuckled and rolled her eyes as she fell to her knees on the blanket, ready to soak up a bit of sun before returning to the water. (A very little bit of sun, Clarke reminded herself. She burned quite easily with her pale skin.) Lexa did the same, settling onto her stomach and sighing at the warmth of the sun’s rays on her back.

“This is the first time I’ve seen the Pacific Ocean,” Lexa said, turning her face to look at Clarke. “I’ve only seen the Atlantic before now.”

“I’ve never seen the Atlantic,” Clarke said.

“Yes, you have,” Abby corrected. “We went to Miami.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Clarke said. “I’ve never seen the Atlantic that I can remember. I was two.”

“Better,” Abby said.

Lexa chuckled. “Well, the Pacific is a lot colder than the Atlantic,” she said. “It’s gotta be in the mid-80’s and it still feels cold.”

“We can go back to the house and hit the pool instead,” Clarke said. “It’s warmer than the ocean and not full of waves trying to kill me.”

“I’m game,” Lexa said. “After I get some sun.”

“Not too much,” Clarke said, already digging in the beach bag for the sunscreen. “I’m trying not to burn this trip and so far, I’m succeeding. But I won’t for long.” She slathered SPF 45 on her arms and chest before moving on to her stomach. Lexa tried not to stare, particularly since Clarke’s mom was right there, but the blonde was making it rather difficult to look away.

And she wasn’t even doing it on purpose.

Lexa knew she was in deep.

 

***

  
Raven really did have to pee, so her bathroom break excuse hadn’t been a lie. She knew most people just peed in the ocean, but then she wouldn’t have been able to see the expression on Anya’s face when she walked into the house in her bikini and nothing else. (She conveniently left her towel done on the beach. Whoops.)

Anya sat on the couch with an annoyed look on her face, still fully dressed in her ripped denim shorts and fitted white tank top. Goddamn, Raven thought to herself.

“Bathroom,” Raven said as an explanation when Anya gave her a curious look, her iPhone still pressed to her ear. Raven gave an innocent grin and closed the door to the powder room on the main level. Once she’d finished and struggled with her still wet bikini bottoms (ugh), she quickly washed her hands and returned to the main living area.

Anya was looking rather pissed as she listened to whomever was on the other end of her phone conversation, but Raven decided to brave it out. She casually walked over to the kitchen and pulled open the refrigerator door. She grabbed a bottle of water and took a long gulp, not having realized how thirsty, literally, she’d gotten.

“Just fucking fix it, Ontari,” Anya snapped and abruptly ended the call. She growled and tossed her phone angrily onto the coffee table. Raven jumped and found herself thinking it was a good thing there was an Otterbox case on the device.

“Problem?” Raven asked nonchalantly, sipping more water. She casually allowed some to escape her mouth and trickle down her chin and drip onto her chest. “Fuck, that’s cold!” she squealed and quickly brushed the water away.

Anya laughed. “That’s what you get for trying to be seductive,” she said. “What are you, sixteen?”

“I’ll be eighteen in the fall, and I got you to laugh, didn’t I?” Raven considered her plan to be a success, even if Anya had gotten her age wrong.

Anya shrugged. “Whatever helps you sleep at night.” She feigned disinterest in the girl and flipped through a magazine.

Raven, figuring that was her cue to exit, turned and walked towards the back door, intending to head back down to the beach before anyone came looking for her. She was on borrowed time already. She put an extra sway in her hips, as best she could with her leg since she couldn’t wear her brace while swimming.

Anya happened to look up just as Raven approached the door and her eyes zeroed in on a scar on the girl’s lower back. Curiosity got the best of her. “Hey, can I ask you something?” she called out before she could think twice.

Raven stopped, hand on the doorknob, and looked back at Anya. “What’s that?”

Anya put the magazine down and stood. “Is your limp due to that scar on your back?”

Raven dropped her hand from the doorknob and turned to fully face the older girl. “You don’t mince your word, do you?”

Anya shrugged and sat on a barstool at the island. “Don’t see the point in it,” she said. “I’m not patient enough.”

Raven hummed in response, respecting Anya’s honesty. “To answer your question, yes. I was shot and the bullet grazed my spine. I’m lucky that I can walk.”

Anya raised an eyebrow, clearly not expecting that answer. “You were shot? Like, with a gun?”

Raven chuckled and walked towards the island so that she stood on the side adjacent to where Anya sat. “That’s normally how it works, yes. It was a freak accident.” She quickly explained about the downstairs neighbor and how doctors said she would likely not walk again. “I’m an overachiever, though,” she said with a smirk. “I need a brace for long periods of standing or walking, but I can manage without for an hour or so.”

“So, am I supposed to feel sorry for you now?” Anya asked, then she grabbed the bottle of water that Raven had set on the table and took a swig.

Raven blanched. “Fuck no,” she said, an annoyed look filtering across her face. “I don’t need anyone’s pity.”

She said it with such conviction that Anya believed her. “Well,” Anya said. “Then I am impressed.”

With that, she stood and retreated up the stairs, leaving Raven both stunned and, honestly, a bit turned on. Most people looked at her with sad sorry eyes when they heard her story, but not Anya. Anya had done exactly the opposite and not thought of her as some charity case. And that was fucking hot.

Fuck, she was so screwed.

Back on the beach, Clarke felt herself getting too much sun and announced that she was going to head up to the pool to cool off a bit. She grinned when Lexa immediately joined her.

Raven was just exiting the back door when they reached the pool area, which had its own fence surrounding it because they'd bought the house when Clarke was so young. Now, it kept animals out.

“Hey Rae,” Clarke greeted. “Want to swim in the pool for a bit?”

Raven shook her head. “Nah,” she said. “I think I'm done with water for the day. I'm going to go pester your mom about mechanical heart valves for a bit.”

Clarke just shook her head and rolled her eyes. She gave Lexa a grin, then opened the gate surrounding the pool. “The water should be warmer than the ocean,” Clarke said, walking towards the deeper end, which was 8 feet. The shallow end was 3 and a half feet. There used to be a diving board, but Abby and Jake had had it removed when, surprise surprise, Clarke had injured herself on it when she was twelve.

“Oh, yeah?” she heard Lexa say from behind her. “Let’s test that theory.”

Hands suddenly pushed against Clarke’s side and she let out a surprised yelp as she hurdled towards the water. She just barely closed her mouth and held her breath before she was surrounded by water. After a moment, she was able to figure out which way was up and she broke the surface, sputtering.

“Alexandria Woods!” she cried out, treading the water.

Lexa was doubled over in laughter and Clarke saw an opportunity. She grabbed the metal railing to the ladder and hauled herself up and out of the pool. Lexa immediately caught on to her plan and shrieked, running to the other end of the pool. Clarke was on her in a flash.

“Oh, no you don’t,” Clarke growled playfully. “Get back here, you heathen!”

Lexa let out another laugh and continued to move away from Clarke until she was back near the deep end. Then she let the blonde catch up to her and before she knew it, they were both underwater, arms and legs intertwined.

When they surfaced, Clarke had a smug grin on her face. “Gotcha,” she said.

Lexa considered telling the blonde that she'd let her win, but she got distracted when Clarke licked her lips and let herself float on her back just in front of Lexa.

Clarke knew she was being mean and teasing Lexa, but she couldn't help it. It was so much fun watching the normally composed and collected brunette get flustered. “Much better than the ocean,” Clarke mused.

“Huh?” Lexa said, tearing her eyes away from Clarke's bare stomach that was literally a foot in front of her.

“The pool,” Clarke clarified. “Better than the ocean.”

“Oh, right,” Lexa said, cheeks burning. She took off swimming towards the shallow end until she could stand.

Clarke followed. She swam close to Lexa, then pressed her hands against the girl’s slim but defined shoulders.

“What are you doing?” Lexa asked as she felt herself being pushed towards the edge of the pool.

“Seizing an opportunity,” Clarke replied.

Lexa’s back was now pressed against the side of the pool, Clarke's hands resting on the ledge on either side of Lexa’s head. Lexa grinned, her own hands coming to rest on Clarke’s slim waist.She marveled at the silkiness of the bare skin beneath her fingertips. “Oh yeah?” she asked, voice husky. “What kind of opportunity?”

Lexa’s teasing told Clarke that she was okay with this. But she also knew they had to be careful. They were far from alone and any one of their fellow housemates, including her own mother, could walk upon them at any moment.

“This one,” Clarke said, then leaned forward. Her lips hovered just above Lexa's, waiting.

Lexa knew she was waiting for her to close the last of the gap between their lips, so she did.

Clarke hummed, the sound reverberating deep in her chest.

Lexa also knew of the risk they faced, so she also kept the kiss light. No tongue. No roving hands. Just the meeting of their lips again and again. Pecks, really, but still potent.

They were on borrowed time, and that was proven when a clearing of a throat broke them apart. They looked up to see Anya standing at the edge of the pool, clad in an olive green bikini and eyeing them over the top of her aviator sunglasses with a look that made Lexa laugh and Clarke to turn beet red.

“You may want to put put your lips on ice,” Anya said. “Your mom is headed back up.” She sat on the edge of the pool so that her feet were dangling in the water.

Clarke sighed and pushed back from the wall, putting some distance between her and Lexa just before Abby came into view, Raven just behind her as she helped carry the beach gear up the stairs.

“How's the apartment, Anya?” Abby asked when she saw that Lexa’s sister had finally joined them outside.

Anya sighed and leaned back on her hands. “I'm not completely sure yet,” she said. “My roommate is being super sketchy and I'm nervous about what I'll find Sunday evening.”

Abby gave her an empathetic look. “Hopefully it's all fine,” she said. “If you need to head back early, we can drive Lexa back on Sunday.”

Anya sighed. “I may have to take you up on that,” she said. “I don't trust my roommate.”

Lexa loved her sister, but she was suddenly excited about the prospect of getting to drive back with Clarke.

“I'll sleep on it,” Anya said.

Meanwhile, while this conversation was occurring, Raven was struggling to not hyperventilate at the sight of Anya in a bikini. Lexa was attractive, sure, but Anya was something else. All long, slim lines and perfectly sculpted limbs. And those legs. Jesus fucking Christ.

An image of those legs wrapped around her head filtered through Raven’s mind and she nearly choked. She coughed, garnering the attention of everyone else and she played it off. “Bug,” she said.

She met Clarke’s eye and struggled to maintain a neutral expression at her best friend’s knowing look.

Whatever. Clarke was smitten with Lexa and had no room to talk.

“I need nourishment,” Raven quickly said. “What's for dinner?”

Clarke shook her head at Raven’s antics and made her way to the steps to exit the pool. “Mom, can we barbecue tonight? We got those steaks the other day.”

“Sounds wonderful,” Abby said. “Everyone good for steak?”

“Lexa doesn't eat red meat,” Anya said. “She made friends with a cow when she was young and now refuses to eat anything that once said ‘moo.’”

Clarke raised an eyebrow and looked down at Lexa. “You made friends with a cow?”

Lexa shrugged. “Long story,” was all she said.

Abby laughed. “We got pork chops, too,” she said. “Is that okay?”

Lexa nodded. “Sounds delicious.”

“Which does everyone else prefer?” Abby asked.

“I'll take a pork chop, too,” Anya said.

“Steak,” Clarke answered.

“I'll have one of each,” Raven said without missing a beat. No one was surprised.

“Glutton,” Clarke teased.

Raven shrugged. “How can you choose between the deliciousness of steak and pork?”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you go! Kind of filler but with plans set for later! What will Clexa discuss once they're alone? What will Ranya get up to? Stay tuned to find out! 
> 
> P.S. the majority of the next chapter (seriously, like 95%) is Ranya because those fuckers are adorable and the scene really got away from me. I'm not sorry. So if Ranya isn't your thing, you can skip most of the next chapter and reevaluate your life decisions. Just kidding. I love you even if you aren't aboard the Ranya ship :) 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: I told my wife that y'all (I can't stop!) want a Clexa fic based on how we met and her first reaction was, and I quote, "make me really good in bed." 
> 
> This perfectly sums up our relationship.


	10. Ranya On My Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven and Lexa switch rooms. Lots of Ranya.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter is 95% Ranya. Their scene ran away from me because I love them so much. If Ranya isn’t your thing, you can skip this chapter. Clexa’s talk will be most of the next chapter. :)

Raven grinned at Clarke’s request that she and Lexa switch rooms. “Bow chicka wow wow,” she said in a singsong voice, moving her hips seductively. They stood in their shared room having showered and changed post-beach.

Clarke groaned and glared at Raven. “It's not like that, Rae,” she said. “Lexa and I have some serious talking to do and there's no other way to do it. This house isn't exactly swimming with places to hold private conversations.”

“Swimming, nice,” Raven said as she sat on the edge of the bed to put on her brace. She really shouldn't have gone so hard at the beach, she thought as her leg ached and she noticed a bit of swelling. Damn. “And of course I'm game to switch. That means I get to share a bed with Anya.”

Clarke sighed again. “For an hour or two, Raven. That's it. Then you're switching back. And haven't you embarrassed yourself in front of Anya enough?”

Raven smirked. “Anya loves it,” she said. “She finds me charming.”

“Uh huh,” Clarke said. “Let's just hope Anya also agrees to this plan.”

“She will,” Raven insisted. She hooked her arm in Clarke’s and pulled her out of the room. “Have you noticed that she can't say no to her sister? Now let's go get some food.”

Across the hall, a similar conversation was occurring.

“Midnight,” Anya said, pointing a finger at Lexa. “At exactly midnight, you and Raven switch back.”

Lexa nodded, agreeing to whatever she could get. “Got it,” she said. “Midnight.”

“I'm serious, Lex,” Anya said. “You're freaking Cinderella here. At midnight you turn into a pumpkin.”

“The carriage turned into a pumpkin,” Lexa said. “Not Cinderella.”

“Whatever. You're not leaving me alone with Raven any longer than that. I won't be held responsible for my actions when she annoys me if you do.”

Lexa narrowed her eyes. “Annoys? Pfft. More like turns you on.”

Anya scoffed. “Gross, she's a child.”

“She is not, Anya, and you know it. Just because you normally go for older women doesn't mean Raven is any less of a woman. She's older than me.”

“By like six months,” Anya said. “She's too young for me.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow. “So you admit you like her, then? It's just the age thing?”

“What? No,” Anya protested. “Her age is just the beginning. She's arrogant and, and…” She trailed off and shook her head. “Just watch the goddamn clock.” She left the room.

Lexa’s eyes widened in shock. Holy shit. Her sister had the hots for Raven freakin’ Reyes. She had to share this with Clarke later on.

Downstairs, Raven struggled to hold back her grin when it was relayed that Raven and Lexa would switch rooms after Abby went to bed. She had until midnight to woo Anya. Score!

She considered making a game plan, but decided that she'd just wing it. That seemed to be the key to winning the affections of the older girl. She may have a permanent limp, but she wasn't blind. She saw Anya’s eyes linger on her chest and legs earlier when she’d walked into the house to use the bathroom.

She just had to make it through the next few hours.

Finally, finally, Abby called it a night at a quarter past ten and after a few minutes, Clarke and Lexa made their way upstairs to talk. (Sure, Raven thought to herself. ‘Talk.’)

Anya didn't move from her spot on the couch where she was staring at her phone. Raven stood and stretched. “I'm going to go lay down for a bit,” she said. “These couches are shit for my back and leg.” That actually wasn't a lie and she winced in actual pain as her left leg twinged in protest. Oh man. She may have done too much without her brace today. Fuck, that hurt.

Anya glanced up, ready to make a snarky comment about how she was playing the sympathy card, but the look on Raven’s face stopped her immediately. The girl’s face was contorted as she rubbed her leg. Either she was a damn good actress or she was in some actual pain.

Anya doubted she was that good of an actress.

“Hey, are you okay?” Anya asked, shooting to her feet.

Raven nodded. “I'm fine,” she said tersely. She was annoyed that her leg was choosing that moment to act up. She took a step towards the stairs and wavered slightly.

Hands immediately grabbed onto her shoulders to steady her. Anya’s hands.

Raven was many things, but humble was not one of them. She angrily pushed Anya’s hands away. “I said I'm fine,” she repeated through gritted teeth and hobbled a few more steps. She made it to the bottom step and went to climb the stairs, but her foot caught on the first step and she tumbled forward. She barely managed to catch herself on her hands before face-planting into the carpeted steps. Tears immediately sprang to her eyes, but it wasn't because she was hurt or because of the pain in her leg.

It was because she was so tired, so fucking tired, of pretending that she was fine. That she didn't care.

And, okay, her pride was a bit hurt, as well.

Hands once again gripped her shoulders to help, but Raven didn't want Anya--or anyone   
\--to see her like that. “Please, go away,” she begged, refusing to look at the girl.

But Anya didn't listen. Instead, she sat on the step next to Raven and just waited, silent.

Raven wasn't sure why, but Anya’s silence rather than trying to comfort her with empty words broke her. She turned so that she could sit alongside Anya on the stairs and buried her face in her arms that were wrapped around the bent knee of her good leg. She cried silent tears as Anya just sat there, her only comforting gesture was a steady, unmoving hand on Raven’s back, just between her shoulder blades.

Finally, Raven’s tears subsided and she sniffled loudly. Without lifting her head, she spoke. “I'm sorry I was a bitch,” she said, voice muffled by her arms.

Anya shrugged even though the girl couldn't see her. “I'm always a bitch and I'm never sorry,” she said honestly. “Now, will you let me help you up the stairs?”

Raven nodded.

Anya stood, pulling Raven up with her. With Anya's help, Raven managed to make it up the stairs with minimal discomfort.

“Thank you,” Raven murmured as she sat on the edge of the bed, still refusing to look at Anya.

“Do you have any medicine you need to take?” Anya asked.

Raven shook her head. “I refuse to get hooked on narcotics and nothing OTC helps. I just have to ride it out. I overdid it today without my brace.” She ran her fingers over the top of said brace and sighed.

“Ice or a heat pack?” Anya suggested.

Raven bit her tongue to not snap at Anya. She was just trying to help. She shook her head instead. “Doesn't do anything. Seriously, I'll be fine after I rest.”

Anya nodded. “You should have grabbed something more comfortable to change into before they locked you out of the room,” she pointed out.

Raven nodded. “Yeah, I didn't think about that.” She cursed her choice of tight jeans after her shower. She finally looked up at Anya and noticed her biting her lower lip and looking thoughtful.

“Um, I don't think anything of mine will fit,” she said.

“You calling me fat, Woods?” Raven asked, finally cracking a smile.

Anya smirked. “No,” she said. “But you're built more like Lexa. I'm like a giraffe while she's a panther. Here.” She rummaged around in what Raven assumed was Lexa’s bag and pulled out a pair of dark gray sweatpants. “These are clean. We stopped at a laundromat in LA. They should fit and you can just keep wearing the shirt you have on.”

Raven took the pants. She considered refusing but the constricting denim of her jeans were starting to get uncomfortable.

“I'll go change in the bathroom,” Anya said, leaving Raven alone to change in private.

Raven sighed and changed as quickly as she could, tossing her brace aside since she planned on just taking it easy for the rest of the night. She was tying the drawstring of the pants when there was a knock on the door.

“You decent?” Anya asked.

“Never,” Raven retorted. “But I'm not naked.” She smirked at that.

Anya opened the door, glad that Raven’s sarcasm had returned. “Thank god,” she deadpanned. “I don't want to have to gouge my eyes out.”

Raven scoffed and settled back against the pillows, eyes closed and hands casually behind her head. “Whatever,” she said. “You wish you could get me naked.”

Anya snorted and sat in the small, uncomfortable chair by the window. It was close enough to the foot of the bed to rest her feet atop the blue and yellow floral duvet. She refused to acknowledge why she'd chosen to change into the short shorts when she could just have opted for long yoga pants. “You keep telling yourself that,” she said, deflecting.

Raven just chuckled in response and moved to roll on her side, grunting when the movement caused a sharp pain in her leg before she managed to find a comfortable position. Then she carefully regarded Anya. “What do you think they're talking about?” she asked.

Anya shrugged. She had an idea, of course, but she wasn't about to share. “No idea,” she said instead.

Raven hummed. “Maybe they aren't talking at all,” she said, wagging her eyebrows suggestively.

“Ew,” Anya said, face contorting. “That's my sister you're talking about. Spare me that mental image.” She shifted in the chair, uncomfortable.

Raven rolled her eyes. “Will you get over yourself and just get up here?” she said, patting the space next to her on the bed. “I won't bite, I promise.” She paused, a playful look crossing her face.

Anya held up a hand, stopping her from continuing. “Don't even say it, kid.”

Raven looked offended. “I wasn't going to say anything,” she said, feigning innocence.

Anya snorted. “Sure,” she said. She crossed her legs, trying to find a comfortable position.

“Seriously, Anya,” Raven said. “I'll behave. I promise. Just get up here. You're giving me secondhand discomfort.”

Anya relented--the chair really was that uncomfortable--and moved to the bed, lying on her back as close to the edge as she possibly could. She crossed her ankles and stacked her hands beneath her head.

“Want to play a game?” Raven asked a few moments later.

“You and your games,” Anya said. “I'm not playing truth or dare or never have I ever.”

“Oh you're no fun,” Raven said. “You had fun at Octavia’s that night. And I learned a lot about you, Anya Woods.”

Anya ignored her. Or, tried to at least.

Raven continued. “I learned that you tend to prefer women, but you’ve been with men in the past. I'm not sure yet if that's because you're bi like Clarke or just had to figure yourself out before realizing you were gay, like me.”

Anya still pretended to ignore her

“I learned that you're the only one of our group to have slept with a girl, but I feel like that won't last very long.”

Anya finally looked at Raven, eyes sharp. “You're awfully full of yourself there, aren't you?”

Raven arched a brow. “I was referring to your sister and my best friend.”

Anya closed her eyes again and groaned. “Ugh, I told you not to talk about my sister and sex in the same breath.”

Raven laughed aloud and continued, voice softer. “I also learned that you're super protective of Lexa by the way you were using the game to vet Clarke,” Raven continued.

Anya shrugged. “Of course I'm protective,” she said. “She's my baby sister.”

Raven hummed. “Yeah, but you're like, super protective. Octavia’s brother isn't even that protective of her. Which makes me think that there's more to the story.”

Anya stiffened at that. She shot up into a sitting position and stared down at Raven, her eyes spitting daggers. “Don’t talk about things you have no clue about,” she growled.

Raven’s casual grin immediately fell and she held her hands up in surrender. She hadn’t expected that reaction. “Hey, hey, hey,” she said, trying to diffuse the situation. “I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just making an observation.”

Anya just stared.

“Seriously,” Raven said, also sitting up. “I have no ill intention. Besides, Clarke already warned me off.”

Anya softened just slightly at that, surprise evident on her face. “She did?”

Raven nodded. “Last night, after you two had gone to bed. Clarke told me that they’d had an important conversation on the beach, but when I asked what it was about, she got all protective and told me not to pester Lexa about it. I know when to mind my own business.”

Anya considered Raven’s words, realizing that Clarke really may have her sister’s best interests at heart. That bitch Costia would have, and did, told her best friend immediately. But Clarke hadn’t said a word to Raven. Huh.

“Anya?”

Anya realized that she’d gotten lost in her own thoughts and looked back at Raven.

“Clarke’s a good person,” Raven said, choosing her words carefully. “I respect her, and I respect your sister by association.”

Anya licked her lips and felt her defenses slowly lowering. She gave a single nod. “Good,” she said. “Maybe one day, Lexa will tell you, but until then--”

“Until then, I won’t say a thing or ask any questions,” Raven interrupted.

Defensed now fully lowered, Anya allowed herself to relax once more as she returned to her laid back position. “Thank you, Raven.”

“Of course,” Raven replied, her cheeky grin returning. “I just learned something new about you.”

“Hmm?”

“You’re even hotter when you’re pissed off,” Raven said.

Anya groaned, covering her face with her hands. This girl was going to be the death of her, for sure. She turned on her side to face Raven and sighed. “Why do you keep doing that when you know there’s no chance of us happening?”

“Do I, though?” Raven asked. “If you tell me, right now, that you are one hundred percent not attracted to me, I’ll stop. Scout’s honor.” She held up three fingers.

Anya was silent for a moment, then let out a huff. “You’re a pretty girl, Raven,” she said. “I can’t say that I don’t find you attractive. You know you’re attractive.”

Raven smirked. “I didn’t say if you don’t find me attractive,” she said. “I said if you aren’t attracted to me. There’s a difference.”

“No, there’s not,” Anya argue.

“Sure there is,” Raven said. “I think Clarke is attractive. I think your sister is attractive. Octavia is fucking gorgeous. But I’m not attracted to them. I don't have any feelings beyond friendship for any of them.”

Anya sighed. “Okay, fine. I’m slightly attracted to you. Happy?”

“Immensely,” Raven replied, a smug grin on her face.

“Nothing is going to happen, though,” Anya insisted.

“Why?” Raven asked. “Seriously, if you can give a logical, concrete reason why, I’ll back off.” She shifted towards Anya.

Anya sputtered. “I’m in college,” she started, watching Raven get closer and closer.

Raven grunted. “And?”

“I like older women,” Anya tried again.

“Branching out is good,” Raven countered. She was in the middle of the bed now. Anya felt her resolve crumbling.

“I--I…” Anya started, then faltered.

Raven saw her chance. “Tell me right now to stop and I will. I’ll pretend that this never happened and spend the rest of the time until midnight just scrolling through social media and laughing at stupid memes.”

Is that what she wanted? Anya thought to herself. She opened her mouth to say ‘yes’ but her brain hijacked her mouth. “Oh, fuck it,” she said instead, throwing caution to the metaphorical wind. She closed the remaining distance between them and pushed Raven onto her back. The girl gave a soft grunt that turned into a hum of pleasure when Anya’s lips closed over hers.

Raven’s stomach clenched at the onslaught of feelings coursing through her veins. She hadn’t expected Anya to call her bluff, but she was happy that she did.

Anya settled more of her weight on top of Raven and deepened the kiss, their tongues meeting again and again, hands already beginning to rove.

Oh, was she happy Anya had called her bluff. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, worth the majority of the chapter? ;) 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: My daughter found my AO3 account last night and is threatening to read my fics if I don’t take her to Mount Zion this week. I’m so proud of my little blackmailer. :’) 
> 
> Okay in reality we were already planning a Mount Zion trip this summer, complete with the river hike. Yes, you hike IN THE RIVER. (Which is good since it'll be over 110 degrees f). Anyway, that said, we'll be out of town for four days and I'm not sure if I'll have internet access and/or time to post. I'll do so as soon as I can, but it may be a few days. :)


	11. Are We Girlfriends?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa have their follow up conversation. Lexa is traumatized by her poor timing. Hilarity ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, dear readers! I come to you today via crappy hotel wifi in Springdale, UT (aka Zion National Park). The wife and kid went to look at some antique shops in Hurricane, and I hate antiquing (we have a weird kid who loves it, I know) so I figured I'd stay behind and try to get a chapter posted. (Or, try to... come on, hotel wifi!). Anyway, apologies for the delay in my usual posting time, but family comes first. :)

Clarke’s heart pounded in her chest as she followed Lexa up the stairs, simultaneously anxious and excited to finally be able to sit down and actually talk to Lexa. She was less nervous than before the pool. Lexa had been a willing and eager participant in their kisses, light as they may have been. She hadn't pushed Clarke away or avoided her advances. That was a good sign, right? 

“So,” Lexa started once Clarke had closed the door to the bedroom behind them. 

“So,” Clarke echoed. She stood awkwardly in front of the door, watching Lexa who stood just as awkwardly by the foot of the bed. The silence that fell between them was tense and full of unanswered questions. Clarke let out a frustrated growl and she raked the fingers of both hands through her hair. “Ugh, why are we suddenly so awkward?” she asked. “We've never been awkward before yesterday.” 

Lexa smirked. “We've also never made out before yesterday,” she pointed out. She sat on the edge of the bed. 

Clarke grinned at the memory of kissing the brunette. “True,” she murmured. “I don't want things to be awkward.” 

Lexa leaned back on her hands and looked up at Clarke. “So, let's not be awkward.” She reached out a hand and Clarke took it, allowing Lexa to pull her closer until they stood knee to knee. 

“Okay,” Clarke said. “So, we talk.”

Lexa nodded. Then she patted the bed next to her. “It's better if you sit,” she said. 

Clarke gave a soft smile and sat, her hip pressed against Lexa’s. “Happy?” she teased. 

“Very,” Lexa said. Then she leaned in to press her lips to Clarke's in a hungry kiss. Clarke immediately responded, bringing her hand up to bury into Lexa’s thick hair. Lexa’s hand found purchase on Clarke’s cheek. 

They kissed hungrily, as if they'd never get another chance to do so again. That wasn't going to happen if Clarke had any say in the matter. She wanted to spend a long, long time kissing Lexa. 

Lexa pulled back and gave Clarke a sheepish grin. “We’re supposed to be talking.” 

“Hey, you kissed me,” Clarke pointed out. 

“Well how could I not when you sit there looking so… kissable!” 

“Kissable? Really?”

Lexa nodded. “Kissable, Clarke. So very, very kissable.” She looked down at Clarke's lips, then shook her head to refocus her brain. “Okay, talk. Yes. Okay.” 

Clarke chuckled at Lexa's flustered actions. She placed a comforting hand on Lexa's and decided to start the conversation. “So, last night was intense,” she started. 

Lexa looked down at her lap, heat flushing her cheeks. 

“Hey,” Clarke said softly, reaching up to place a finger under Lexa's chin to force her to look at her. “Why are you embarrassed?” 

Lexa sighed. “I'm not embarrassed,” she said. “Not really. More like I'm just really vulnerable right now and I don't like that feeling. But I also trust you.” 

Clarke nodded slowly. “I want you to know that I don't think of you any differently than before. I don't care what's between your legs. I fell for your brain, not your sexual organs.” She paused and gave a bit of a smirk. “And, maybe, your abs.”

That got Lexa to laugh and Clarke loved the sound of it. 

“Always a wordsmith,” Lexa teased. “I don't know how to thank you for being so great about everything.”

Clarke shook her head. “You don't have to thank me for anything,” she insisted. “I reacted the way anyone who's not a complete asshat would react.” 

“There are a lot of asshats in the world, Clarke.” 

“I know,” Clarke said. “But I'm not one of them.”

“I know,” Lexa echoed. She turned on the bed to more fully face Clarke and took a deep breath. “When we moved here, I told myself I was just going to keep my head down and get through the next year and a half of high school while keeping myself as invisible as possible. I didn't plan to even make friends, let alone…” She paused momentarily before continuing. “Let alone find someone like you who I can't stop thinking about.”

Clarke smiled that stupid grin. “You can't?” 

Lexa shook her head.

“I can't stop thinking about you, either,” Clarke said. “You've been in my head since the day we met and you said that athletics were more important than the arts. You were so frustrating but so cute at the same time.”

“You were the cute one,” Lexa said. “You got so flustered and mad.”

“I was also sick,” Clarke said. “Not my finest moment. I think I was wearing a dirty shirt and had zero makeup on. Wasn't my hair in a sloppy bun?” 

“You were beautiful.” 

She said it with such conviction that Clarke had no choice but to believe Lexa. 

“And you scare the shit out of me,” Lexa continued. 

Clarke knit her brow in confusion. “How so?” 

“Because of how much I like you,” Lexa explained. “Like, I  _ really _ like you. I have from the start, and I had told myself that I wasn't going to do that. Not so soon after everything that went down in D.C.” 

Clarke considered that for a moment before she responded. “I know what happened was horrible and should never happen to anyone. But I need you to know that I would never tell anyone without your consent. I didn't even tell Raven and I tell her everything.”

“I know you wouldn't,” Lexa reassured. 

“If you need time, to take things slow or even hold off on altogether, I get it. I'll wait.”

“It's not fair to ask you to wait, Clarke,” Lexa insisted. 

“But I will anyway. I've liked people before but never like this.” 

Lexa gave a small smile. “Me neither,” she said. 

“Not even…?” Clarke trailed off, not wanting to say the name of the girl that betrayed Lexa. 

“Not even her,” Lexa said. “Not even close.” 

“Okay, so I'll wait. Until you're ready.”

Lexa laughed. “Seriously, Clarke. You don't have to wait.”

“I do,” Clarke said. “I will wait.”

Lexa shook her head. “No, that's not what I meant. I mean, you don't have to wait because I don't need time to think about it. I want to be with you. I want to go on dates and hold hands. I want to… to kiss and make out and, if we're both ready one day, do other things and experience many, many firsts together. I want it all and I don't want to wait.” 

The last word were barely out of her mouth when Clarke surged forward and attacked her lips with her own. Lexa had been ready this time and immediately tunneled her fingers into silken blonde strands as she explored Clarke’s mouth with a nimble tongue. 

Clarke made a noise of pleasure, a cross between a moan and a whimper, and tried to move even closer to Lexa. But she couldn’t get close enough. She had always rolled her eyes when people talked about raging teenage hormones, thinking those people who couldn’t control their actions in the heat of the moment were merely weak. 

Now, she understood. And now, she needed more. 

Lexa seemed to feel the same way because, without breaking their kiss, she pulled Clarke back with her so that she was on her back and the blonde was over her, half covering her with her torso, but still placing most of her weight on the bed. 

Clarke hummed in pleasure at the new position, which gave her greater access to Lexa’s abs that she loved so very, very much. She ran her hand over the muscles, over Lexa’s thin tank top, marveling at the solidness beneath her fingertips. She broke the kiss and buried her face in Lexa’s neck as she caressed, grinning when Lexa tilted her head back to allow Clarke greater access to her pulsepoint. Clarke kissed and sucked. She was gentle enough to not leave any telltale marks, but firm enough that she actually made the brunette shiver. 

“Clarke,” Lexa said, voice breathy. 

“Hmm,” Clarke responded, moving her lips along the top edge of Lexa’s fitted tank top. God, she loved the tank tops, she thought to herself as her lips trailed across the girl’s delicate collarbones. She paused briefly as she reached the top swell of Lexa’s breast and looked up. Lexa gave a small, nearly indiscernible nod and Clarke leaned back in to kiss along the curve. Lexa wasn’t as well endowed as Clarke in the chest department, but Clarke didn’t mind. She loved Lexa’s slim, athletic frame. 

Suddenly, Lexa gasped at the feel of Clarke’s lips on the upper part of her breast and shifted in response. The movement caused Clarke’s leg to become trapped between Lexa’s and she felt something solid brush against her upper thigh. 

They both immediately stilled. Clarke knew exactly what her leg was pressed against, and she was waiting to see if Lexa was going to pull back or become uncomfortable. She lifted her head to look Lexa in the eye and only saw uncertainty, not discomfort or anxiety. 

“You’re, ah,” Clarke said softly. 

Lexa gave a slow nod. “I’m sorry,” she said. She started to move away from Clarke, but Clarke stopped her. 

“Don’t,” she said, voice comforting. “You don’t have to move."

Lexa swallowed hard. “No?”

Clarke shook her head. “Unless you want to,” she said. Then she gave a sly smile. “I like feeling how much I affect you."

Lexa returned her smile and pushed a lock of hair out of Clarke’s face. “It’s not fair,” she said. “You can hide yours.”

Clarke grinned and felt emboldened. She placed her lips close to Lexa’s ear. “You’ll just have to trust me when I say that my underwear is soaked right now.” 

Lexa swore. “Fuck, Clarke, you can’t say things like that.” She huffed out a (sexually) frustrated breath and ran a hand through her hair. 

Clarke laughed aloud. “I’d say I’m sorry, but we’d both know that’s a lie.” 

Lexa nodded in agreement. “Regardless, I think we both need a breather,” she said. “I’m not ready for... for sex.” 

Clarke kissed Lexa softly. “I know,” she said. “Me, neither. But that doesn’t make me any less horny.” 

“Clarke!” 

“I love teasing you like that,” Clarke said. She sat up on her knees and looked down at her… girlfriend? Were they girlfriends now? She had to know. “Are we girlfriends now?” 

Lexa’s brain reeled at the sudden change of conversation. She sat up and grabbed a pillow, trying to inconspicuously hide her erection. “Um, yes? I mean, if you want to be.” Her cheeks burned again. Why was she blushing? Clarke had literally just felt her hard penis on her leg and  _ this _ was making her blush?

Clarke smiled, both at Lexa’s actions with the pillow and her words. “I’d like that very much,” she said. She kissed her girlfriend--her  _ girlfriend! _ \--again, this time keeping it soft so they wouldn’t get carried away. 

“Can we just cuddle now?” Lexa asked when they parted. “I like to cuddle.” 

Clarke nodded. “Definitely,” she said. “Don’t tell Raven or Octavia, but I love a good cuddle.” 

By midnight, both were struggling to stay awake. It had been a long day. 

“I wish we could just stay like this,” Lexa said, nuzzling her face against Clarke’s jaw. “I want to know what it’s like sleeping with you.” Her eyes widened when she realized how that came out. “I mean actually sleep.” 

“Me, too,” Clarke said with a chuckle. “But I am not going to be the one to make Anya angry. I’m surprised she isn’t waiting at the door to drag you back.” It was 12:02. 

Lexa sighed. “I guess I should go back. Maybe they fell asleep.” 

They kissed one last time, lingering for as long as they dared before Lexa slipped out of the room and down the hall to the other guest room. Clarke just sat there on the bed with a dreamy look on her face. She knew she should at least try to wipe the look off her face before Raven returned to the room and teased her mercilessly, but she couldn’t help it. 

She heard movement in the hall and did her best to school her features into a neutral look, expecting Raven to enter the room at any second. But it was Lexa that came in, eyes wide and a look of pure shock on her face. She quickly closed the door behind her and stood with her back against it, gaping. 

“What?” Clarke asked, immediately concerned. She stood and rushed over to Lexa’s side. 

“Um, they, uh, they,” Lexa sputtered out, face going from pale as a ghost to red as a tomato in the matter of seconds. 

“What’s going on?” Clarke asked, now really concerned. 

Before Lexa could answer, there was a knock on the door. Lexa screeched and jumped away from the door. She hid, actually hid, behind Clarke. 

“Lexa, Clarke, it’s me!” Raven whispered loudly. 

Clarke gave Lexa a curious look and opened the door. “What on earth is going on?” she asked when she saw both Raven and Anya on the other side looking all kinds of disheveled and… was that a smug grin on Raven’s face?

“They were hooking up!” Lexa hissed, clutching onto Clarke’s arm.

“What?!” Clarke said, louder than she’d intended. She winced and hoped she hadn’t woken her mother. 

“We were  _ not _ hooking up,” Anya protested, arms crossed. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, Ahn,” Lexa growled. “Raven was just sucking your tit to, what? Check for lumps? And Raven are those my pants? Why are you wearing my favorite pants? Wait, no, I don’t want to know.” 

Clarke’s eyes widened. Raven looked pleased with herself. Anya stared daggers at her sister. Lexa looked like she was going to pass out. 

“Jesus christ, Raven,” Clarke muttered, scrubbing her face with her hand. “Okay, we’ll deal with this tomorrow. I’m tired and Lexa is obviously traumatized and needs sleep. Raven, get in here and try not to look so smug. Anya, take your sister to your room and make her get some sleep.” 

Clarke was glad when everyone just did as she said without complaint. Though, she did catch Raven giving Anya a look that said they’d continue what they’d started later before Clarke could close the door. 

“Don’t even start,” Clarke warned, pointing a finger at Raven. She noticed a mark on Raven’s neck. “Is that a hickey?! Wait, nevermind. I don’t want to hear any of the sordid details."

Raven shrugged. “Your loss, Griffin. Anya’s a damn fine kisser." 

Clarke put her hands over her ears. “La la la I can’t hear you,” she sang out. 

Raven snorted. “And you call me immature,” she said, sliding under the covers. “We’ll talk about this later, then.”

“Or never,” Clarke countered, turning off the light. 

Darkness fell over the room and Clarke settled under the covers. Silence fell and she thought Raven had already fallen asleep when the girl broke the silence. “I hope you and Lexa were able to talk about things.” 

Clarke smiled into the darkness. “We were,” she said. 

“Good,” came Raven’s sleepy reply. “Goodnight, Princess.” 

“Goodnight, Thirst Queen.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. There you go. Poor Lexa having to see that! Don't worry, down the road it simply becomes a funny story (you know, one she can tell at Ranya's wedding haha). I'm not sure when I'll get to post again. We will be home on Saturday, so probably either Saturday evening or Sunday morning. :) 
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: We have three German Shepherds (one is full GS and the other two are mixes).


	12. Raven's Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven makes a discovery, awkwardness ensues, Clarke is protective

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Home, that is. :) Hopefully I'm back to a more regular updating schedule, so stay tuned.

Saturday morning, Anya announced that she was going to drive back early to check on her apartment. “My roommate is now AWOL and I’m nervous,” Anya said as they all ate breakfast. “Our parents said Lexa can stay, though, and ride back with you tomorrow, if that’s okay.”

Abby nodded. “No problem,” she said.

Raven perked up. “Is it safe to drive all that way by yourself?” she asked, biting into the two pieces of sausage she’d speared on her fork.

“It’s only five and a half hours,” Anya said, pretending that she hadn’t been sucking face with this girl just eight hours prior.

“Well, I think someone should go with you and I think that someone should be me,” Raven announced.

“I said I’ll be fine,” Anya insisted, finally looking at Raven and narrowing her eyes at her.

Clarke rolled her eyes but only Lexa saw. She cleared her throat and sent a ‘you owe me’ look to Raven. “That’s probably not a bad idea,” Clarke said, setting her fork down on her plate. “Didn’t you mention something the other day about a project that you wished you could work on before school starts back up?”

Raven looked momentarily confused until she realized Clarke’s intention. “Oh, right! The project. Um, yeah. For my comp sci class. I’m nervous about writing all that coding by Friday. When the project is due.”

Anya knew she was lying through her teeth and glared at Raven. “Fine,” she said through gritted teeth. “But I’m leaving at ten whether you’re ready or not.”

“Aye, aye, captain!” Raven said, complete with a salute. She immediately put her dishes in the sink and rushed upstairs to pack. She had a lot of shit and only an hour to get ready to leave.

Lexa was quiet the entire time, focused on her pancakes and sausage so that she didn’t have to look up at her sister or Raven and see the image that had been filtering through her head all night. Raven on top of her freaking sister, topless and sucking on Anya’s--

“Lexa,” an insistent voice pulled her out of her thoughts, thank god. Clarke was looking at her expectantly.

“Um. What?”

Clarke chuckled, knowing her girlfriend--her girlfriend!--was still in a state of shock from what she’d walked in on the previous night. “I asked if you wanted to claim the shower before Raven so we could head out to the docks early.” Abby had suggested renting a boat for the day.

“Oh, uh, yeah,” Lexa said with a nod. “Sounds good.” She retreated up the stairs.

“I’m going to make a trip to the grocery store for some boat-friendly food and ice for the cooler,” Abby announced, clearing plates off the table. “Clarke, will you get these dishes rinsed and into the dishwasher?”

“Sure thing, Mom,” Clarke agreed, standing and bringing her own plate to the sink.

“I should be back before you and Raven head out, but just in case I’m not, it was really nice meeting you, Anya,” Abby said as she gathered her purse.

“You too, Abby,” Anya replied. “Thank you again for letting us stay here. It really helped with our budget.”

Abby left shortly after that and Clarke began loading the dishwasher.

Upstairs, Raven was listening to her favorite 90’s punk rock playlist on her iPhone as she packed, her earbuds pressed firmly in both ears and drowning out all other sounds. She sang along--badly, but who cared?--as she stuffed her clothes into her bag. She had no idea what was clean and what needed washing, but that could be sorted out later. Or, more likely, she’d just throw it all into the washing machine when she got home.

As she packed, she came upon a pair of dark grey sweatpants and remembered that they were Lexa’s. She tossed them aside to give back to the girl before she left.

Okay, clothes were all packed. Where was her brace?

Oh, right. She’d tossed it aside last night while in Anya and Lexa’s room.

Last night. Anya.

Raven couldn’t stop the smug grin from crossing her face. She knew that an outsider may think of her continued pursuit of Anya to be over-the-top and a bit creepy, but Raven knew that Anya knew that all she had to do was to outright tell Raven to back off and she would. And Raven knew that Anya wouldn’t hesitate to tell her point blank to stop. But last night, when Raven had told Anya to tell her to stop if she didn’t want her, Anya had attacked her lips instead.

Oh yeah, Anya wanted her alright. And this car ride home was the perfect time to seal the deal, so to speak.

The beat of Yellowcard’s ‘Ocean Avenue’ began pouring through her earbuds as she grabbed the borrowed sweatpants and carefully made her way down the hall to the second guest room. The door was open and no one was inside, so she dropped the sweats onto the bed and spotted her brace and discarded jeans on the floor in the corner. Perfect.

What else?

Shower. She needed a shower. And she only had forty-five minutes before Anya was leaving. She didn’t doubt that the girl would actually leave without her.

She dropped the brace and jeans in her shared room with Clarke before heading back down the hall towards the bathroom. She was so into the song--seriously, the 90’s had the best music--that she didn’t even think about the fact that the door was closed. She never did, really. The door was often closed when no one was in there because it creaked at night otherwise. The hallway vent blew air on it and made it move. It was super creepy if you didn’t realize it was just a draft. As such, the door typically stayed closed. If someone was in there, they’d lock it.

Only, the lock was a bitch sometimes and refused to properly latch.

Raven, bopping her head along to the beat, grabbed the doorknob and pushed the door open.

Oh fuck.

The room was, in fact, occupied. It was occupied by a very startled and very wet Lexa. The girl stood just outside the shower, having obviously just stepped out. Her hair was dripping water onto the floor as she looked up in complete shock, towel still on the rack.

She was completely naked.

Lexa rushed to grab her towel and hide her body, but it was too late. Raven would have had to been blind not to see. Everything. She saw everything.

“Raven!” she cried out, heart racing as she struggled to wrap the towel around her.

“I’m so sorry!” Raven sputtered, yanking the earbuds from her ear as she looked up at the ceiling. “I thought everyone was still downstairs and the door wasn’t locked and I… I… I’m sorry.” What the hell was going on? Was what she’d seen what Clarke had meant by their important conversation? Did Clarke even know? Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“Get out!” Lexa was panicking.

“Right, going!” Raven quickly shut the door, eyes wide. “Sorry!” she yelled through the closed door, then beelined it back into the room she’d been sharing with Clarke.

Okay. This was… a development.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Clarke’s voice sounded from the doorway, startling Raven. She jumped.

“We heard yelling,” Anya continued.

Raven felt her cheeks burn. Seriously, you could fry an egg on her face with how hot her skin was. “I, um, I didn’t know anyone had come upstairs,” she said. She still wasn’t sure what Clarke knew, exactly. “The-the door. Didn’t lock. Um. Lexa. Shower.” That was it. This was her current vocabulary. Short words and shorter sentences.

“Fuck,” Anya said. “Raven, seriously?” She looked equally pissed and protective.

“The door wasn’t locked!” Raven cried out. The look on Clarke’s face and the look she exchanged with Anya told Raven that the blonde already knew. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean to… to…” she shook her head and took a deep breath in effort to calm herself.

Anya huffed and left the room, heading towards the bathroom.

Meanwhile, Lexa was still panicking as she rushed to dry off enough to get dressed. Fuck. The stupid lock on the door. Clarke had mentioned that it was a bit tricky sometimes but she hadn’t really been paying attention to anything other than the blonde’s ass that day.

Fuck.

Finally dressed and hair in a half-assed bun, she hesitated, unsure of what would happen when she opened the door. She could hear her sister and Clarke’s voices in the hallway. Then there was a soft knock on the door. “Lexa?”

It was Anya.

“Lexa, it’s just me. Open the door.”

Lexa took a deep breath and pulled the door open to see Anya on the other side, looking concerned. Anya quickly crossed the threshold of the bathroom and shut the door behind her. “Is it as bad as it sounds?”

Lexa nodded her head. “I had just gotten out,” she said, sounding miserable.

Anya sighed and pulled her sister in for a comforting hug. She was not a hugger except when it came to Lexa. “It’ll be okay,” Anya reassured. “You know Raven is a good person. Do you really think she’ll have a problem with this?”

Lexa shook her head. She knew Raven would be fine with it. “But she actually saw me,” Lexa said. “It’s different than just knowing. Clarke hasn’t even seen... me yet.” Nope, the blonde had just felt her, hard against her thigh the previous night. Oh, god, at least she’d hadn’t had an erection or even a semi when Raven walked in! “It’s just a whole new level of knowing.”

Anya studied her sister closely, looking for any signs of her dysphoria. “Are you doing okay?” she asked in a tone that she knew would get her real question across.

Lexa paused and carefully considered Anya’s question. Was she okay? She’d been luckier than a lot of intersex adolescents that she'd met and read about on the internet. Her own body dysphoria was never as severe as many others’. She'd never dealt with crippling depression or thoughts of hurting herself or worse. She credited it to her supportive and open parents and sister, and good relationships with her doctors.

But it did occur occasionally. The last time had been just after the assault, when things had been healing and all she could think about was that if she'd been born without a penis, none of that would have happened.

But she'd healed and the dysphoric thoughts had dimmed, finally dormant once again.

Lexa nodded. “Yeah,” she said honestly. “Yeah, I'm good. Other than embarrassed as any teenager would be if their friend walked in on them naked, I'm okay.” She grimaced. “I'm just not looking forward to this awkward conversation.”

Anya nodded, understanding completely. “Well, there’s no time like the present to face your demons,” she said. Anya had always been one to just do something when it was difficult.

For once, Lexa agreed, just wanting to get this over with. “Don’t think that I didn’t realize how quick you were to reassure me that Raven is a good person who won’t tell anyone while it took you weeks to trust Clarke.”

Anya ignored her, though she was glad to see her sister’s snark was still present, and pushed her out of the bathroom. They found Raven and Clarke in their room, looking to be in a heated discussion. They stopped immediately when Lexa and Anya entered the room.

Raven jumped up from her seated position on the bed and rushed towards Lexa. “I’m so sorry,” she repeated. “I should have taken out my earbuds and knocked.”

Lexa just nodded and licked her lips, uneasy and not knowing how to respond. Thankfully, Anya took the lead.

“Did you tell her?” Anya asked Clarke, wanting to know what exactly Raven knew.

Clarke shook her head. “No,” she said. “Just yelled at her for being an idiot.”

Raven actually looked timid in that moment. “I was. The biggest idiot.”

Anya looked at Lexa and nodded.

Lexa sighed and faced Raven. “You’re probably wondering about me,” she said. “My anatomy.”

Raven looked like a deer in the headlights and shifted her weight back and forth on her legs. “Um, yeah, kinda,” she said truthfully.

“I’m not trans, if that’s what you’re thinking,” Lexa clarified.

Raven shrugged. That’s what she first thought, it was true.

“I’m intersex.”

Raven gave a confused look, not understanding.

“I’m genetically a female but have male reproductive organs.”

“Oh,” Raven said, still confused. “That’s possible?”

“It’s rare,” Anya jumped in. “Extremely rare and in most cases, parents opt for sex reassignment surgery shortly after they find out.”

“But it’s risky and our parents decided to wait and let me make the decision when I was older,” Lexa said. “I’m not having any surgeries.”

“Okay,” Raven said, needing to process. Then she looked at Clarke, who had moved to stand beside Lexa in a show of support. “Again, I’m sorry I walked in without knocking,” she said. “It was a dick move and--” Fuck. Had she really just said it was a dick move?! “Shit, I’m sorry. I did not mean it like that.” Frustrated, she growled. “Look, I’m not a bigot, okay? I say asshole-y things when I don’t think and do asshole-y stuff when I don’t mean to, but I’m not going to shun or judge you or treat you any differently because you have a penis.” She paused momentarily. “Now, I need to go bleach my eyes so Clarke and your sister don’t kill me for having seen you naked.”

“Raven, wait,” Lexa said before the girl could leave the room. Raven looked at her in question. Lexa took a deep breath. “Can you, um, keep this to yourself? It's that I'm ashamed or anything, but… it's just easier if people don't know. Even friends.”

Raven, who'd still been tense and awkward from before, immediately softened at the words and the look on Lexa's face. “Of course I won't,” Raven assured. “You didn’t even have to ask.”

“Not even Octavia?” Lexa asked. “I'll tell her eventually just… not yet.”

Raven nodded. “Not even her,” she said. To show Lexa she was being honest, she stepped forward and hugged her. “You're still Badass Woods,” she said when she stepped back.

“Hey, I'm Badass Woods,” Anya protested.

Raven laughed. “No, you're a softie,” she insisted. “You just put on a show for everyone else. But I know.”

“I don't even want to know,” Lexa said. But she smile. “Come on, Clarke. Help me get ready for the boat trip.”

Clarke followed her girlfriend, but not before sending Raven a narrow-eyed, I’m watching you look that rivaled any that Anya had given her. Once alone in the room Lexa and Anya shared, Clarke faced Lexa and placed her hands on her cheeks. “Are you really okay?” she asked, voice concerned.

Lexa nodded. “Yeah, I’m okay,” she said, wrapping her arms around Clarke’s waist and pulling her in for a hug. “Just embarrassed, but only because who wants to be walked in by a friend as they’re literally dripping water on the bathroom floor?”

Lexa had meant it as a joke, but the words and mental picture it gave Clarke only made her groan at the thought. “Don’t tease me like that,” Clarke murmured into her ear.

“Oh, like you were teasing me last night?” Lexa reminded, leaning back to look Clarke in the eye. “I seem to remember something about soaked underwear.”

“Oh, gross,” a voice from the doorway (which they hadn’t shut, goddammit) startled them both. They jumped apart and saw Anya standing there, looking annoyed. “I don’t want to hear about your… whatever.” She waved her hand in front of her to emphasize her words.

“Sorry,” Clarke said, just her face said that she wasn’t sorry at all. She winked at Lexa and walked towards the door. “I’ll meet you downstairs, Lex.”

“Seriously, Lex,” Anya said once Clarke had disappeared. “Don’t do anything stupid, okay?”

Lexa raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”

Anya looked up from where she was tossing clothes into her duffel bag. “Like get that girl pregnant. I’m too young to be an aunt. Don’t get me wrong, I’d be the most badass aunt this world has ever seen, but I’m too young. And so are you. Do you need condoms? I can get you some for free from the campus health clinic.”

Lexa’s cheeks burned. “Oh my god, no, Mom, I don’t need condoms. We’re not… there yet.”

Anya sighed and turned to fully face her sister. “Look, I’m not trying to embarrass you,” she said. “I just want you safe for if--when--you get to that point.”

Lexa softened. “I will be,” she said. “We will be.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Raven. 
> 
> Okay, I had to get Raven in the know for a future plot line. Stay tuned! 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: I got so burnt at Zion. My wife and kid are totally fine with their darker complexions (they're Argentinian and the kid is also part Italian) while I'm over here looking like a freaking lobster (I'm Irish in case you hadn't guessed... redheaded and all that). In pain. Send help.


	13. Boats and Conversations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clexa on a boat, Abby has a talk with Clarke, and it's decision time for Anya

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you guys think about the amount of Ranya in this fic? Someone left a comment that there was too much Ranya and not enough Clexa. My math-oriented brain analyzed the contents and determined that this fic is about 70-30 in favor of Clexa. I don’t want to write what you guys don’t want to read, so please let me know what you think. I did tag Raven/Anya for a reason. This chapter is the last Ranya-heavy chapter (the second half is Ranya and I had already written it pre-comment, and future chapters have Raven talking to Clarke about this scene and I don’t want to change that because I like the bonding moment they get, so I’m keeping this chapter as is because I am on vacation and I’m lazy). The next several chapters are Clexa’s first official date and some other Clexa-centric chapters that may or may not involve fun "firsts". ;) And I will make this the last chapter with heavy Ranya if that’s what you guys want. 
> 
> Please let me know! 
> 
>  
> 
> -LexaRexa

Abby rented a 23 foot pontoon boat for the three of them for the day. They would stay in the San Diego Bay, so they didn't need anything too fancy, and Clarke was instantly glad for the covered part of the boat that would provide shade from the sun in the cloudless sky. She was already a bit pink from the beach the day before.

Abby used the time to get to know Lexa, whom she expected she would be seeing a lot of in the near future. It was obvious that her daughter liked this girl and vice versa. She wasn't 100% certain of their exact relationship status just yet, but she knew it wouldn't be long until they were officially dating, if they weren't already.

Or, maybe they already were, Abby thought as she watched her own daughter carefully and lovingly tuck a stray lock of hair behind Lexa’s ear. She made a mental note to sit down and have a serious talk with Clarke once they got home.

They’d had the sex talk when Clarke was entering puberty long ago, but now it was time for the real sex talk. The one that she probably should have had with Clarke already but had pushed it off because she'd been busy with work and Clarke hadn’t really had a serious relationship.

She also made a mental note to google what topics to cover for the sex talk when it was in reference to a same sex relationship.

Abby really didn't care about her daughter’s bisexuality, but it did make certain conversations more challenging. What was considered safe sex for two girls? If Clarke were dating a boy, she'd get her condoms from the hospital clinic just in case. (Abby was too young to be a grandmother!) Dental dams. She knew those were a thing. They supplied them at the clinic as well. Was that going to be necessary anytime soon?

Abby glanced back at the two girl as she drove the boat. She looked up just in time to quickly kiss, then laugh at a private joke.

Yep. Definitely necessary.

The sun was beginning to set on the horizon when they returned the boat, all of them pleasantly exhausted from the long day on the water. They'd found a small, semi private inlet to drop anchor and swim for a bit, then have lunch. After, each girl had taken a turn at the wheel. Clarke’s turn was cut short when she nearly ran into a buoy.

“I can feel the salt crystallizing in my hair,” Lexa said as they walked into the house.

“You can go shower first,” Clarke said. She felt equally as grimy with saltwater but the shower was so far away and she was so comfy on the couch.

“I'll be quick,” Lexa said, heading up the stairs.

Once Lexa was gone, Abby saw an opportunity. Not for the talk, that was better left for when they were at home and had plenty of time, but for an easier discussion. She sat beside Clarke on the leather couch (easier to clean sand and beach residue off of!).

“So, anything you want to tell me now?” Abby asked, a somewhat teasing note in her voice.

Clarke wasn't dumb. She knew her mother had been watching them all day, which was why they'd kept things light. But it had been impossible to hide everything. She sighed contentedly and sat up to face her mom. She knew her mom was supportive of her sexuality, but it was still scary admitting that she was dating a girl. But she had promised to keep her mom in the loop, and she could see that she was trying to be more present for her.

“I, um, guess you could say we're together,” Clarke said.

“You guess?” Abby echoed. “You're not sure?”

Clarke huffed. “Okay, yes, we’re together, but it's still new. We haven't even gone on a date.”

Abby nodded, suspicions confirmed. “You two aren't exactly subtle, you know.”

Clarke looked sheepish. “Sorry,” she murmured.

Abby laughed. “Oh, sweetie, no need to be sorry. But, we do need to lay some ground rules.”

Clarke knit her brow. “Ground rules?”

“Yes, especially now that Raven and Anya are gone,” Abby said. “Rule number one: no closed doors if you two are in the same room.”

Clarke’s cheeks burned. “Mom!”

Abby held up her hand. “This will also be the rule when we get home. Rule number two: no sleepovers.”

Clarke sighed. “But what if Octavia or Raven have a sleepover? We're all friends. They can't invite just one of us.”

Abby thought for a moment. “If one of their parents is home, fine. As long as they know you two are dating and not to let you go off on your own. I know these sound ridiculous, Clarke, but you're still young. I just want you safe.”

Clarke wanted to be mad, but the rules were ones she'd expect if she were dating a guy, so she was glad her mom wasn't treating Lexa any different. And, deep down, she recognized that the rules were because her mother cared. She nodded. “Okay.”

“And you still have a curfew,” Abby reminded. “I've gotten a bit lax recently when you're with Octavia and Raven because I trust the three of you. But if you're with just Lexa, it's 10pm on school nights and midnight on Fridays and Saturdays.”

Clarke bit her lip, not able to argue with her mom’s logic. “Anything else?”

Abby thought, then nodded. “Yes. I want you to promise me that you’ll talk to me.”

“About what?”

“Anything,” Abby said. “Keep me informed on where you'll be when you're not at home, how school is going, everything like that. And I'll do my part to ask and be around more.”

Clarke nodded. “I can do that,” she said honestly. She just hoped her mother followed through on her promise to make herself more available.

Later on, Clarke was tempted to break her mother’s first rule of keeping the door open when she and Lexa were in the same room. Apparently, she wasn’t the only one.

“Ugh, I hate your mom’s stupid logical rules,” Lexa groaned into her ear. They were in Clarke’s room, sitting on the carpeted floor and watching a movie on Clarke’s MacBook. Or, they had started out watching a movie. They hadn’t been paying attention to the screen for quite some time. And they hadn’t even been kissing because they were afraid that Abby would drop in at any moment. And if they started kissing, they’d start to touch, and they started to touch, well, you get the picture.

Instead, Clarke had been tracing patterns over the back of Lexa’s hand and up her arm, creating an invisible piece of art with swirling clouds and twinkling stars. She called it ‘Sky.’

Clarke sighed. “I know,” she said softly. “I really want to kiss you.” She brought Lexa’s hand up to her mouth and placed her lips to the inside of her wrist.

Lexa echoed Clarke’s sigh. “I mean, I get them, the rules,” she said. “It’s because she cares about you. But still.” There was that adorable pout again.

Clarke risked the chance of her mom walking in and captured Lexa’s lips with hers in a quick kiss. It took everything in her power not to deepen the kiss, especially when Lexa made that sound of contentment in the back of her throat. She was going to pull back in just a moment. She needed just… a bit… more…

“Really, Clarke?”

Clarke jumped back at the sound of her mother’s voice. Dammit! Really? Her mother had to walk in during the ten seconds she’d been kissing her girlfriend in the entire two hours they’d been alone.

Lexa’s cheeks burned. She knew Abby knew about them, but it was still embarrassing to be caught kissing her daughter.

“You said no closed doors,” Clarke said. “You didn’t say I couldn’t kiss my girlfriend. Is that a rule, too?”

Abby sighed, standing in the doorway. “Of course not,” she said. “Just, keep it PG, okay?”

“PG-13,” Clarke countered.

Abby pointed a stern finger at her daughter, but her eyes had a sparkle of jest in them. “PG and I let Lexa stay in here while I head to bed.” She winked at Lexa who smiled in return.

Clarke narrowed her eyes, then cracked a smile. “Deal,” she said.

“I just came up to say goodnight and remind you that we’re leaving early tomorrow morning, so actually get some sleep at some point.”

Clarke nodded. “Sure thing, Mom,” she agreed, all of them knowing that two girls would stay up way too late for how early they’d need to be up. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Abby,” Lexa said.

 

***

  
[RANYA - Skip the rest of the chapter if Ranya isn’t your thing.]

“Thanks for letting me tag along,” Raven said as Anya merged onto the expressway. She did her best to play it cool even though all she wanted was for Anya to pull over and finish what they’d started the previous night. When Anya didn’t say anything, she looked over at her and noticed that she was gripping the steering wheel so tightly with both hands that her knuckles were turning white. “Are you okay?” she asked.

“Last night shouldn’t have happened and it won’t happen again,” Anya forced out, refusing to take her eyes off the road to look at Raven for even a second.

Raven reached out and turned down the radio. “What was wrong with last night?” she asked.

Anya let out a breath and shook her head. “I’m not interested in a relationship with anyone, let alone a girl who is two years younger than me.”

“Year and a half,” Raven corrected.

Anya rolled her eyes. “Whatever,” she said. “Doesn’t change the fact that I’m not looking to date anyone.”

Raven let out a laugh. “Who said anything about dating?” she asked. “Looks like it’s you’re the one who’s awfully full of herself.”

“Oh, come on,” Anya scoffed. “You cannot tell me that you are interested in a no strings attached fling. You’re in high school.”

“Why do you keep saying that? What does that have to do with anything? The last thing I want is a relationship. I’m not like Clarke and Octavia who crave that close commitment and ‘going steady’ life. Gross. Not for me. I am young and I am hot and I am ready to experience all parts of my sexuality.”

“You’re a virgin.”

Raven blanched. “What? No I’m not.”

“I wasn’t the only one paying attention during the Never Have I Ever game, Raven.”

That caused Raven to smirk. “So you were interested the day we met. Interesting.”

Anya rolled her eyes and huffed. “I was not interested,” she stressed. “I was paying close attention to all of Lexa’s new friends.”

Raven hummed, not believing her. “Sure,” she said. “But I never said I was a virgin during that game. That ship sailed last summer.”

“You didn’t drink when Clarke said that she’d never had sex with a girl, and I seem to remember you telling me last night that you’re gay, so…”

Raven laughed. “Yeah, well, last summer I wasn’t sure if I was gay or not,” she explained. “It wasn’t long after that when I realized that, yep, gay.”

“But you haven’t slept with a girl,” Anya said.

“Don’t tell me you subscribe to the ridiculous notion that you can’t know you’re gay if you’ve never slept with someone of the same sex.”

Anya shook her head. “No, of course not. That’s not what I was getting at. I just meant that, while you’re not technically a virgin, you’re still a virgin in terms of lesbian sex.”

“You were a virgin at one point,” Raven pointed out. “Gotta start somewhere.”

“Why me?” Anya asked, running the fingers of one hand through her hair. “Why on earth do you want me as your first?”

Raven thought about that for a moment. “Because you’re…” She paused, thinking of the right adjective. “Alluring.”

Anya let out a snort. “Alluring? Really?”

Raven nodded. “Yep. I’m only a lesbian sex virgin because no girl ever appealed to me enough to actually sleep with. I’m not some dreamy-eyed, star-crossed teenager expecting to find the love of her life in high school to lose my v-card to. In this case, v standing for vagina.” She chuckled at her own joke. “That shit never works out. Don’t get me wrong, your sister and my best friend are exceptions to that rule, I’m certain.”

Anya scrunched up her nose. “I told you not to bring up my sister and sex in the same sentence.”

Raven ignored her. “You put on this facade of being this tough, bitchy, gives-no-fucks girl, but I can see past all that. Because you let me. And you let me because you like me.” She did an imaginary mic-drop.

Anya was silent for the next several hundred miles and Raven was content in the silence, having said her peace. She turned the radio back up and stared out the window at the full desert landscape. Those Joshua Trees sure were ugly motherfuckers.

It wasn’t until they were half an hour outside of the city that Anya finally broke.

But it wasn’t in response to any of Raven’s words.

“I’m going to stop by my apartment before taking you home because it’s on the way and Ontari still hasn’t messaged me back or returned my calls,” the older girl said. “I need to see what the damage is.”

Raven just nodded.

Anya’s apartment was close to the school’s campus, which was just outside of the city, so they were pulling into a covered parking garage within a few minutes. “It’s too hot to stay in the car, so come on up,” Anya said. It was true. While it was only in the lower 80’s, inside the car would be boiling in minutes, especially when Anya wasn’t sure how long she’d be in the apartment.

They entered the three-story building in silence, took the stairs to the third floor in silence, and entered apartment 329 in silence.

Then Anya saw her kitchen.

“Jesus fuck!”

Raven’s eyes widened at the scene before her. The range and surrounding cabinetry were covered in black, likely charred. There was a glob of melted… something on top of the range. Plastic, maybe?

“What the hell happened?” Raven voiced.

“Ontari,” Anya growled. She reached for her phone in her back pocket again and called her roommate. Getting the voicemail after two rings (meaning the bitch rejected her call), Anya waited for the beep. “Ontari, you need to get back to the apartment ASAP. I am not getting stuck with this shitshow. You better find a way to pay for this damage or I am going to kick your ass into next week!” She angrily hit the END key and growled in frustration.

Raven had an idea. “Anya, look at me.”

When she did, Anya’s eyes widened in shock when she saw Raven slipping off her shirt. “Wh-what are you doing?”

Raven grinned and popped the button on her jeans. “Distracting you,” she said, casually taking a step back towards the hallway. “Is it working?” She lowered the zipper of her jeans.

“Um.” Anya blinked, suddenly wondering what Raven was trying to distract her from. Oh, right, her kitchen. Then Raven smirked that goddamn smirk and the thought was gone again.

“I see it is working,” Raven said. She glanced behind her and noted two doors. “Which one is yours?”

“Huh?” Anya asked, licking her suddenly dry lips as Raven’s lacy red panties peeked above her jeans.

“Your room,” Raven replied, knowing that this was the moment of truth. If Anya told her to stop messing around and get dressed, she’d stop and do just that. Then Anya would drive her home and this would be nothing more than a funny story in ten years. But if Anya told her which door led to her bedroom, there’d be no turning back. Anya would follow her into that room and teach her all about the wonders of lesbian sex.

Anya knew this. She knew it was decision time. Tell Raven to get dressed or tell her which door led to her bedroom. She knew what she should do, but for once, she hesitated in listening to her head over her heart. Her head said tell her to get dressed. But her heart… well, that told her to say fuck it and just… fuck.

She listened her heart.

“On your right.”

Raven’s bra went next, and Anya actually swooned as she rushed to catch up with Raven’s state of undress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, guys. I’m not going to detail the Ranya sex scenes (not because of any comments… I already wasn’t planning on detailing them) because this is a Clexa fic first and foremost (but I’d be willing to do a separate bonus Ranya fic detailing their, ahem, fun times from this chapter if enough people request it). Remember, 70-30 in favor of Clexa. I promise that I *will* go into great detail of Clexa sex, though, when they get there. ;-)
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: I'm still a lobster but I discovered that black tea bags do wonders for the pain! Highly suggest.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> EDIT: Okay, after many, many comments (seriously, you guys are amazing!) and some time to think, I've come to a conclusion. I think *some* people are annoyed because Ranya is moving so much faster than Clexa, but of course they are! I want to take my time with Clexa and not rush their relationship. I want to give it the time and attention it deserves. I want them to make all the discoveries of first love and all that. Ranya is a side pairing and will, honestly, be used at times for plot development. I'm going to keep doing me, because I can't do anything other than me, and I'll keep mentioning when there will be a Ranya-heavy scene (no more full chapters of just Ranya, I promise) and I'll do my best to separate it like this chapter is. It's easy to skip, and doing so won't hurt your understanding of future chapters. So, it's simply: don't like, don't read! There. Fixed. :) 
> 
> Also, no, I don't ship Raven with Luna. Mainly because I was never introduced to Luna. I never watched past Lexa's death, and I will never watch more. I can't. It's too painful, and I refuse to do that to myself. So, I will live in my alternate universe/canon divergent happy times. :) 
> 
> [Apologies if any of the above comes off as bitchy in any way... I'm just a grumpy old lady with sunburn. Don't mind me! I love you all, whether you like Ranya or not. Cheers!] 
> 
>  
> 
> <3 Always,
> 
> LexaRexa


	14. The Stars Align

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stolen moments, stolen kisses, and first dates.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't going to post another chapter today, but I need to move on from chapter 13. I got a lot (A LOT) of feedback and MOST people were polite and nice. Most people supported me and my story, so I'm going to continue as planned. I will continue to write Ranya (which I TAGGED FOR A REASON), but I will also be sure to indicate portions that are Ranya-centric. This chapter is Clexa-centric with a bit of Clarke/Raven bonding thrown into the mix. 
> 
> This chapter is also LOOOOOONG. Like, double+ what I normally write. It's because it was originally two chapters but I combined them into one so y'all get their first date sooner. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy.

The Monday after Spring Break was always rough, second only to the day after Winter Break, and this one was proving excruciating for a sleep-deprived Clarke. The only bright spot in returning to school after a blissful week in Coronado was seeing Lexa. She ignored the fact that it had only been twelve hours since they'd dropped the brunette off at her house and that they'd been texting ever since, well into the night and early morning hours. Hence why she was sleep-deprived.

She yawned and leaned her head against Lexa’s shoulder as they sat at their usual table in the courtyard. It was a gorgeous day, at least.

“Oh my god, get a room,” Octavia said as she set her lunch tray on the table with a solid  _ thud _ . “You two are nauseating.” 

Clarke looked up at her friend and rolled her eyes. “Oh, please,” she said, lifting her head. “At least we aren't making out in the middle of the cafeteria like  _ someone _ was when they first got together.” She looked pointedly at Octavia. 

“I have no idea what you're talking about, Griffin,” Octavia replied coyly. 

“Uh huh,” Clarke said. 

“Where is Lincoln anyway?” Lexa asked. The senior boy had been absent from her AP Calculus class that morning. 

Octavia sighed. “Stuck in freaking Florida. His family’s flight got canceled because of that hurricane in the Gulf. Probably won't be back until Wednesday.” She put her head on the table. “I'm in Lincoln withdrawal.”

“What a drama queen,” Raven said as she joined them. “You facetimed him during 3rd period. I'm surprised the sub didn't throw your phone out the window.” 

“Not the same,” Octavia’s muffled voice said, sounding miserable. 

Clarke wanted to make fun of the girl, but she knew she'd be acting the exact same way if she hadn't seen Lexa in that amount of time. She squeezed Lexa’s hand to reassure herself that the girl was right there next to her. Lexa squeezed back. 

“Anyway,” Raven said, bored with the subject. “I have an announcement. I'm sure it's no shock to anyone, but, yes, it's true. I am a certified sex goddess.”

Octavia finally sat up. “What are you going on about, Reyes?” 

Raven grinned and Clarke had a sinking feeling in her stomach. Oh god. Don't let her announce that she got into Lexa’s sister’s pants in front of Lexa. 

“I managed to make a girl come three times my first time sleeping with a chick.” 

Jesus Christ, Clarke thought to herself. “Hey Lexa, you forgot to get a napkin,” she said loudly, hoping the girl would get her hint even though there were a stack of napkins already on the table. 

“You're so right can't have too many of those,” Lexa rushed out and left the table as quickly as she could. 

Clarke glared at Raven. “Could you maybe  _ not _ talk about doing my girlfriend’s sister in front of my girlfriend?” 

Raven had the decency to look guilty. “Sorry,” she murmured. “I forget they're related. Anyway,  _ three _ times.” 

“You're such a fucking liar,” Octavia said. “You didn't sleep with Anya.” 

“Um, Octavia, I'm not so sure about that,” Clarke said. “They were caught practically doing it Friday night. And is that a freaking hickey?” 

“Wait, what?” Octavia asked. “Why do I always miss the good stuff?!” 

“Admit it, O,” Raven said. “I'm a sex goddess.” 

“I will do no such thing,” Octavia said. “How did this happen?” 

Clarke didn't care to hear the details. She'd rather find her girlfriend and maybe steal a few moments alone before they had to go back to class. “I'm going to go find Lexa,” she said before Raven could begin the story. “I'll see you guys later.” 

She grabbed both her bag and Lexa’s and headed in the direction she'd seen Lexa go. She found the girl coming out of the bathroom and looking relieved to see Clarke.

“Thanks,” Lexa said when Clarke handed her her bag. “I won't be able to look Raven or my sister in the eye for at least a month.” 

Clarke sighed and slid her arm though Lexa’s. “I know. Want me to try and make you forget about it?”

“How?” Lexa asked, looking at her girlfriend suspiciously. 

“We have ten minutes before the bell rings,” Clarke said as she led her down a hallway. “And I happen to know a place we can be alone for a few minutes.” 

Lexa grinned. “Oh yeah?” 

Clarke nodded. They walked around a corner and past the stairwell. She wasn't dumb enough to makeout with someone under the stairs. That was the first place administration looked for students skipping class and sharing ‘private’ moments. Instead, she pushed the auditorium door open and stopped in front of a closed door. Clarke fished out her school ID and lanyard. On it was a single brass key. 

“I helped Raven with the lighting for the school play this past fall,” she explained as she unlocked the door. “They never asked for the key back, and I had forgotten about it until now…” She stood to the side to let Lexa enter the small room before her. In the room was a control board for the stage and house lights, two hard plastic chairs, and not much else. 

“Clarke, we could get in trouble for being here,” Lexa said, but she didn't move to leave. 

“Probably,” Clarke said as she closed and locked the door behind her. “But I miss you.” 

Lexa sighed and put her arms around her girlfriend’s waist. “I miss you, too,” she said softly, then leaned in to gently kiss Clarke’s lips. 

“We won't skip classes to be here or anything,” Clarke said, her hands finding purchase on Lexa’s hips. “Just come here every once in a while during lunch or before school… Just when we need to steal a moment alone. I mean, who knows when we’ll get to actually ever kiss at my house with my mom’s rules.” She rolled her eyes. 

Lexa chuckled. “I’m sure we’ll manage,” she said. 

“Yes, like now,” Clarke said. “We’re wasting precious time.” She pressed her lips to Lexa’s, who sighed into the kiss and immediately granted access to Clarke’s dexterous tongue. They hadn’t gotten to really be alone since Saturday night, and after getting caught by Abby kissing, they hadn’t wanted to risk getting caught again. 

Lexa let herself get lost in Clarke--in the feel of their lips and tongues intertwining, in the feel of their chests pressed against one another, in the smell of Clarke's scent, fresh and coconut-y. She’d worried that she was letting her guard down too much, but then Clarke kissed her and all her worries vanished in an instant. Clarke was quickly becoming her safe place and that both scared and exhilarated her. 

She trusted Clarke, but she wasn’t completely sure just yet that she trusted herself. But, that wasn’t something she was interested in dwelling on at the moment.

Clarke made a noise of pleasure deep in her chest when Lexa’s hand dipped beneath her shirt and caressed the smooth skin of her lower back, just above the waistband of her jeans. Her own hands moved to slide into Lexa’s back pockets, gripping the soft but firm muscles of Lexa’s ass. 

“Clarke,” Lexa groaned, pulling away from their kiss. “As much as I want to continue, I also don’t want the entire school knowing about Little Lexa.” 

“Little Lex--Oh! Wait, you call your penis ‘Little Lexa?’” 

Lexa smiled. “Yes, and if we don’t stop, she’s gonna become a problem. These shorts are good, but they don’t work miracles.” 

Clarke swallowed and nodded, stepping back. “Sorry.” 

Lexa shook her head. “Don’t be,” she said. “It’s not your fault. I mean, well, technically it is because it’s you and you’re hot, but I’m not mad about it.” 

Clarke was about to respond when the sound of the bell dismissing lunch rang throughout the building. She sighed. “Back to the grind,” she said, sad their time was up. 

“Don’t say ‘grind,’” Lexa groaned, readjusting her jeans and glad she’d worn her best pair of compression shorts that day. They were a bit more expensive than other brands, but they worked so well. She was going to have to invest in a few more pairs if she and Clarke were going to keep making out in public places. “Not in public, at least.”

Clarke laughed and opened the door. “What about in private?” 

Lexa threw her a coy smile. “In private, you can say whatever you want.” 

Clarke stored that bit of information away for future use.    
  
  


 

***

  
  
  


“Do you want to hear the story or not?” 

“Not.” 

“You’re no fun, Princess.”

Clarke rolled her eyes at Raven. It was Monday afternoon and she was driving the brunette home after school. Octavia had flag football practice and Lexa had a dentist’s appointment right after school, so her mom had already picked her up. 

“Raven, why are you so hell bent on discussing your sexcapades with my girlfriend’s sister with me?” she asked as she slowed to a stop at a red light. 

“Because,” Raven said, turning in the passenger seat to face Clarke. “You’re one of my best friends and I should be able to talk about this stuff with you.” 

She sounded so pitiful that Clarke sighed. Well, at least Lexa wasn’t around to hear the details. “Okay, fine. What happened?” 

Raven broke out into a wide smile. “We stopped at her apartment to check out the damage her roommate did before she took me home. Only, she didn’t take me home for a while…” She trailed off, a dreamy expression creeping onto her face. 

“Rae!” Clarke said, snapping a finger in front of Raven. 

“What? Oh! Right. Sorry. Um, the kitchen was completely destroyed. Like, burnt to a crisp. And Anya was all pissed and called her roommate, only she got sent to voicemail and had to leave this nasty message. Let me tell you, pissed Anya is hot. Like, temperature of the surface of the sun hot.”

“I get it, Raven,” Clarke said as the light turned green and she continued on towards Raven’s complex. 

“Just making sure you have all the pertinent information,” Raven said. 

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Clarke muttered. Raven ignored her. 

“Anyway, to distract her from her anger, I started taking off my clothes.”

“You what?!” Clarke screeched. 

Raven waved it off. “Whatever, Griffin. She and I both knew that she didn’t just want to ‘check on her apartment’ when she invited me upstairs. And all she had to do was tell me to stop and I would have. But she didn’t and next thing I knew, I was in her room and we were both naked.” 

“That’s more than enough information, Raven, seriously,” Clarke said as she pulled into a parking space near Raven’s family’s apartment. She put the SUV in park, but left it running. She turned to face her friend. “Look, I’m not trying to keep you from talking about this with me because I know you need to, and I know I’ll need to when, uh, you know, I have sex for the first time, but can we skip the super specific details? I don’t need to know those.”

Raven rolled her eyes. “Sure,” she said. “I’ll just say this, then.” Her smile had completely vanished and Clarke wasn’t sure she’d ever seen her look so vulnerable. “I think I fucked up.”

Clarke blinked, not expecting that. “What? How?”

“Not at the sex,” Raven quickly clarified. “That I was fucking awesome at. I mean, about Anya. I think, uh, I think I like her.”

“Um, Rae, I hope you like her if you had sex with her,” Clarke said. 

“Not like that,” Raven said. “I mean, I think I  _ really _ like her. And I may have told her that I wasn’t interested in a relationship. That it was just sex.”

“Oh Raven,” Clarke said. She knew Raven well. She knew that the girl acted tough and uninterested in having a relationship but, in actuality, she was a giant softie who wanted someone to love. 

“I know, I  _ know _ ,” Raven said. “And it was the truth. At the time. And then we… I already miss her.” She looked up at Clarke. “Don’t tell Lexa?” 

Clarke shook her head. “I won’t,” she said. “But you should tell Anya. Maybe she feels the same.”

Raven shook her head. “No,” she said. “She was pretty adamant about not wanting anything more than sex.” She sighed and threw her head back against the leather head rest. “And I don’t want to ruin anything.”

“Ruin what, exactly?” Clarke asked. “Are you going to hook up with her again?”

Raven shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe. If she wants to. She mentioned that she’d be in the city this coming weekend, staying at her folk’s house, and she mentioned that she didn’t have any plans for Friday night yet. I think she was hinting that she wanted to get together again.” 

Clarke studied Raven, taking note of her pained expression. “Look, if you’re developing feelings for Anya and you’re sure nothing will come of it, no pun intended, then maybe you should just back off altogether. Otherwise, you’ll end up hurt and I don’t to see you hurt.” 

Raven shook her head. “I can’t, Clarke. I know you’re right. Logically, I know that. But… I’ll take anything I can get from her. Even if it’s just a few hookups.”

“Don’t you think you deserve more than that, though?” Clarke asked. 

Raven shrugged. “Maybe. I don’t know. Look, I have a lot of homework, so I’m going to head inside and get started on it before my mom gets home.” She opened the car door and jumped out. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

“Raven, wait,” Clarke called out before she could slam the door shut. “Just, be careful, okay?”

Raven gave her a sad smile and nodded. “I will.” She shut the door and walked inside the building. 

Clarke sighed and made her way home, thinking about her friend the entire way there. She wished that she could ask Lexa’s advice since she knew her sister better than anyone, but she’d promised Raven that she wouldn’t tell Lexa about her developing feelings, and she wasn’t one to break a promise like that. For now, she’d just have to keep trying to be a voice of reason and offer a listening ear when Raven needed it.

 

LEXA (5:25PM):

_ >> Still no cavities wooooo! _

 

CLARKE (5:26PM):

_ >> Show off. I’ve had three :(  _

 

LEXA (5:33PM):

_ >> Brush your teeth! :p _

 

CLARKE (5:34PM):

_ >> I do! I just like chocolate :p _

 

LEXA (5:40PM):

_ >> It’s ‘cause you’re so sweet. ;) _

 

CLARKE (5:44PM):

_ >> Lameeee. What are you doing Friday around 7pm? _

 

LEXA (5:45PM):

_ >> Um. idk. Nothing that I know of. Why? _

 

CLARKE (5:47PM):

_ >> Would you like to go on a date with me?  _

 

LEXA (5:48PM):

_ >> Really? _

 

CLARKE (5:50PM):

_ >> What do you mean really? YES!  _

 

LEXA (5:51PM):

_ >> Okay :) Where? _

 

CLARKE (5:53PM):

_ >> It’s a surprise. Wear something nice but comfortable. And warm. Jeans are fine. I’ll pick you up at 7 sharp.  _

 

LEXA (5:55PM):

_ >> Clarke, what have you got up your sleeve? _

 

LEXA (6:01PM):

_ >> Clarke! Answer me.  _

 

LEXA (6:04PM):

_ >> Clarke? _

 

LEXA (6:21PM):

_ >> Goddammit, Clarke. _

  
  
  
  
  


***

  
  
  


“Are you going to tell me where we’re going tomorrow?” Lexa asked into her phone. Clarke was on the other end of the FaceTime call. 

“Nope,” Clarke said, popping the ‘p.’

Lexa sighed and put on her best stern face. “Clarke, my parents won’t let me leave without knowing where I’m going to be,” she bluffed. It was probably true, anyway. 

Clarke grinned. “Got it covered,” she said. 

“What?” Lexa asked, sitting up straighter on her bed. “What does that even mean?”

“I got Anya in on it,” Clarke explained. “I texted her to ask your parents. They know where we’ll be. The condition is that they have to meet me tomorrow night before we leave, so I’ll be there closer to 6:45.” 

Lexa’s eyes widened. “You’ve… talked to my parents?” 

“Through Anya, yes,” Clarke clarified. “I knew they knew about us, so I wasn’t letting out any big secret, and I need to meet them anyway. You’ve already met my mom.” 

Lexa nodded. “I suppose,” she said. “I still don’t like not knowing where we’re going.” She pouted. 

“Oh my god, that’s so cute!” Clarke gushed at the look on Lexa’s face. 

Lexa rolled her eyes playfully. “Whatever, Clarke. I need to take a shower before my brother gets home and uses all the hot water.” 

Clarke laughed. “Okay. I should shower, too. I’ll see you tomorrow morning. Text me when you’re done.”

“Okay. Bye.” 

They each kissed their camera and then hung up. Lexa fell back on her bed, an arm thrown across her eyes as she let out a long sigh. She was actually happy, something she wasn’t expecting so soon after moving to a new city.

While she wanted nothing more than to continue laying there thinking about her girlfriend, she really should shower before Aden got home from baseball practice. She hoisted herself off her bed and stripped off her shirt and bra as she walked towards her en suite bathroom. At least she had her own bathroom at this house. At the D.C. house, she’d had to share with Anya. 

She turned the water on to a pleasantly scalding temperature and shucked off her jeans, followed by her compression shorts. She sighed in relief at being freed of the tight material and rubbed at the indention lines along her hips. Most girls complained about uncomfortably tight bras, Lexa complained about uncomfortably tight shorts. 

Stepping into the steaming shower, she closed the curtain behind her and let the water soak her hair and body. She quickly washed her hair, working the shampoo through the strands as her thoughts turned to Clarke and their upcoming date. She wondered where she was taking her. She’d said dress nice, but comfortable. Jeans permitted. So… the movies? Dinner? What? 

She rinsed her hair and applied conditioner on the ends, then washed her face. She grabbed the washcloth and poured a healthy amount of lavender scented body wash onto the cloth and began washing the day’s grime from her body, starting at the top and working her way down. 

A sudden image of Clarke in her own shower a few streets over popped into her mind uninvited, but not unwelcomed. Lexa gasped at the mental image of her girlfriend covered in soapy water, running a loofa over her torso and breasts. Lexa really liked Clarke’s breasts. She hadn’t actually seen them in the flesh, but she’d seen them covered in nothing more than a bikini top, which was, essentially, a glorified bra. She wondered what color her nipple were. Pink? Or more brown? Something told her, with Clarke’s complexion, that they were a soft pink. She remembered reading something about a woman’s nipple color matching their lip color. Or was that the perfect lipstick color? 

She suddenly felt guilty about picturing Clarke naked and contemplating what her nipples looked like, but then stopped and thought. Why should she? She was her girlfriend, after all. Her very, very attractive and busty girlfriend. (While Clarke was an ab girl, Lexa was most definitely a boob girl.) 

Lexa groaned softly as she felt herself getting hard. She dropped her washcloth and placed both hands on the tiled shower wall, letting the water run over her back as she watched herself grow with each passing second until she was sporting a full erection. 

Fuck. 

She considered her options, but nothing seemed comparable to just taking care of it herself. Well, nothing short of  _ Clarke _ taking care of it, but neither one of them was ready for that just yet. 

“Oh, fuck it,” she groaned out and moved her hand to grip the throbbing shaft. She sighed at her own touch, not having done this in quite a while. She’d gotten hard many, many times since meeting Clarke, but this was the first time she let herself seek relief by her own hand. 

She slowly worked her hand over her hardness, using the bit of precum that had pooled at the tip as a bit of lubricant as she pumped up and down. She tried not to let herself think of her hand as Clarke’s, but she couldn’t stop the image from infiltrating her head. Then, just as suddenly, the image of Clarke’s hand turned into the image of Clarke’s  _ mouth _ and Lexa gasped as a shock wave of desire rolled through her entire body. 

Fuck. 

She pumped harder and quicker, needing release. 

She felt it quickly approaching and she continued her efforts. “Oh, fuck,” she growled out, so close to orgasm. “Clarke, please,” she groaned. Then she crested, feeling wave after wave of pleasure coursing through her entire body as spurt after spurt of milky white semen shot out to land on the tiled wall of her shower. 

She slumped against the tiles, grateful for the cool surface against her heated cheek and chest. She willed her breathing back to normal as she stood there, water already cooling off as she panted.

After recollecting herself, she stood up straight and quickly rinsed off the tiles before finishing her shower as quick as she could before all the hot water was gone. When she stepped out and wrapped a towel around her, she saw the look on her face in the mirror and she paused. She looked… content. 

Lexa smiled and continued drying off so she could put on her pyjamas (which consisted of sweatpants and an old tank top) and get back to talking to Clarke. 

Oh, she had a bad. 

  
  
  


***

  
  
  


The good thing about living in a the desert was the sky. Of course, it didn’t seem like anything special while within the city limits, but it wasn’t that long of a drive before the majority of the light pollution was gone and the air became crystal clear. 

It was also typically clear skies without a cloud in sight, as was the case Friday evening. Clarke’s plan was a go. 

She arrived at the Woods’ house at exactly 6:45, as promised. She was greeted at the door by Lexa, who looked nervous. The brunette quickly stepped aside and let her into the house, which was a bit smaller than the one Clarke lived in, a single-story ranch, but no less nice. Anya appeared next, giving Clarke a rare smile. Clarke couldn’t quite meet her eye, not after what Raven had told her. 

“You must be Clarke,” a soft voice pulled Clarke’s attention. She turned to see an older version of Lexa, but with darker hair and brown eyes. She assumed this was Lexa’s mother. “Both your mother and Lexa have told me so much about you; it's nice to finally put a face to the name.”

“You, too ma'am,” Clarke answered, turning on the charm. 

“I’m Iris, Lexa’s mom,” the woman said.

Clarke shook the woman’s hand firmly. “It’s nice to finally meet you, Mrs. Woods.”

Iris smiled warmly. “It’s Iris, please. Lexa’s father should be back shortly. He went to pick up Aden from practice.” 

Clarke nodded, knowing that Aden was Lexa’s younger brother. “You have a lovely home,” Clarke said, taking note of the many photos that lined the walls. 

“Thank you,” Iris said. “Come, let’s sit in the living room. Hopefully they’re back before you have to leave. I know you have a lot planned for the evening.”

“Am I seriously the only one who has no clue what to expect tonight?” Lexa asked, sounding annoyed. 

“Pretty much,” Clarke answered, giving her girlfriend a smile. 

Lexa pouted that adorable pout but everyone ignored it. Once in the living room, Clarke took a seat on a soft couch, Lexa right beside her. Anya had excused herself down the hall, citing that she also had plans and needed to get ready. Clarke refused to acknowledge that Raven had mentioned that she’d be seeing Anya again that night. 

They made small talk for the next several minutes, Iris asking typical getting to know you questions which Clarke answered with ease. They discussed school and Clarke's art. 

“My mom wants me to go to med school and follow in her footsteps, but I'm not sure I want to,” Clarke explained when Iris asked what she wanted to do after high school. “I know it's not the most lucrative major, but I think visual arts is more me. But at the same time, I like biology and I already know a lot about medicine from my mom.” She shrugged. 

Iris gave her an encouraging smile. “Do whatever makes you happy,” she said. “That's what I keep telling Lexa.” Clarke knew that Lexa was debating following in her sister's footsteps and majoring in pre-law or going in her own direction of something more psychology-related, like criminology. “You still have time to figure it all out,” Iris said. 

Clarke decided that she liked Lexa's mom, and was sad but also relieved that her dad and brother hadn't returned before they had to leave. “Probably got caught up talking to the coach,” Iris said with an eye roll. “Now, curfew is--”

“Midnight,” Lexa said. “Yes mom. I know. I've just never had to follow it because, well, I never went out.” 

“Just making sure you remember,” Iris said. 

“I'll have her back before then,” Clarke said. “Mine is also midnight.” 

They were off shortly after that, Lexa still completely in the dark. “Are we at least getting food?” she asked, feeling like Raven. “I'm hungry.”

Clarke laughed and nodded. “Yes, there will be food.” But she said nothing more. 

Lexa sighed and gave up asking, at least for the time being. She gave Clarke a curious look when she merged onto the highway, which was little more than two lanes traveling in either direction. The sun was just starting to set. “Are we going to Vegas?” she joked, noting that they were traveling south and out of their small city. 

Clarke laughed. “Maybe one day,” she said. “We're not going that far tonight.” 

Lexa huffed. Clarke just placed a hand on her leg, squeezing gently. “You'll like it. I promise.” 

About half an hour later, Clarke exited the highway onto a seemingly desolate road. Lexa saw a lone sign that read ‘Grand Springs Observation Deck 17 miles’ and wondered if that was their destination. 

“What's Grand Springs Observation Deck?” Lexa asked. 

Clarke just smiled. “You'll see.” 

Soon, they were pulling into a small parking lot, only a few other cars in the lot. “Stay here,” Clarke said. “I'll be right back.” She made her way into the small but new looking building and approached the information desk. 

“Welcome to Grand Springs Observation Deck,” the middle aged woman that stood behind the desk said with a smile. 

“Hi,” Clarke said. “I'd like to purchase a drive-in permit, please.” 

The woman nodded. “Alright no problem. Permits are eleven dollars for residents and fifteen for non-residents.” 

Clarke fished out her license to show the woman that she was a state resident, then used her debit card to pay.

“Here's a map with park information and the different areas you can park. Parking is only permitted in the designated areas and is strictly enforced. Display this parking pass clearly in your front windshield. Bathroom facilities and picnic areas are indicated on the map. We close at eleven.” 

Clarke nodded at all the information. “Thank you,” she said. 

“Enjoy your time here.” 

Clarke smiled and exited the building, ready to get back to Lexa. “Ready?” she asked when she returned to the car. 

Lexa gave her an incredulous look. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to be ready for, Clarke,” she huffed out. 

Clarke grinned and leaned over to kiss her cheek. “Have I mentioned that I love your pout? It’s so cute.” 

Lexa glared at her. 

“Okay, here,” Clarke said, handing her the map. 

“Grand Springs Observation Deck,” Lexa read as Clarke pulled out of the parking lot. “‘The Mojave Desert’s top stargazing destination.’ Stargazing?” She looked over at Clarke. “You’re taking me stargazing?"

Clarke nodded slowly, suddenly worried Lexa wouldn’t like her idea. “Yeah? I mean, I didn’t want to do something boring, like dinner and a movie. Not on the first date. And stargazing is, well, it was something my dad and I did before he died. He taught me a lot about the constellations and distant galaxies but I haven’t really done it since he died. I thought, maybe, it could be our thing?” She shrugged. “Unless you hate the idea. We can turn around and just do that dinner and a movie. Cheesecake Factory or maybe Olive Garden.” She was rambling. 

“Clarke, stop,” Lexa said. 

Clarke did, pulling her car over as far as she could and coming to a full stop in a no-parking zone. 

Lexa laughed. “I meant stop talking, you dork, not stop the car.” 

“Oh,” Clarke said, looking sheepish. She continued driving. 

“And I don’t hate the idea,” Lexa said, placing a hand on Clarke’s thigh. “I love it.”

“You do?” Clarke asked. 

Lexa nodded. “Yes. It’s romantic. Is this a place you came with your dad?”

Clarke nodded. “A few times,” she said. “We’d only discovered it a few months before he died. It’s got these really cool observation decks with hammocks and places you can lie back and look at the stars. And picnic areas. I brought food.” 

“I can’t wait,” Lexa said. “I don’t know much about astronomy, but I’m willing to learn.” 

Clarke smiled. “I’ll teach you all I know,” she said. She drove past a lot of the more popular pullovers that had the hammocks and chairs that leaned back and opted for a less popular area that consisted of little more than a few concrete picnic tables. There was no one else around, unlike the other areas where there’d been people already. 

They settled at a table and enjoyed a meal of Subway Sandwiches (“Classy, Clarke.”) and old fashioned Coke in glass bottles. (“I know how much you love the glass bottles, Lexa.”) And for dessert, Clarke produced a package of Lexa’s favorite Oreo flavor--original, duh. (“Double stuf is just too much filling. Original is the perfect ratio of cookie to cream.”) 

By the time they’d polished off the sandwiches and had several Oreos each, the sun was setting. They watched the sun set behind the mountains in silence, arms wrapped around one another as they sat on top of the table, their feet on the bench seat. Clarke smiled when Lexa leaned her head against her shoulder and hummed in content. 

“Can I ask you something?” Clarke finally broke the silence. The sun had disappeared behind the mountains, but it was still too light to see the stars. 

“Hmm?” Lexa asked. 

“Do you ever think about, you know, sex?” 

Clarke felt Lexa chuckle against her shoulder. “Clarke, I'm seventeen. I think it's safe to say that I think about sex a lot.” She looked up at Clarke. “Especially when my girlfriend is gorgeous. Like, out of this world gorgeous.” 

Clarke blushed at the words. “Yeah, okay,” she said. “But more specifically, do you think about us having sex?” 

Lexa was glad that it was too dark for Clarke to see her face flush crimson red as she thought about just how vividly she'd thought about having sex with Clarke while she showered. “Again, my girlfriend is gorgeous. Of course I do.”

“Me, too,” Clarke whispered. “I know we have a lot of other things to experience before we're there, but I know I want it to be you.”

Lexa smiled widely. “I want that, too. And you're right. We have a lot of other firsts to get through.” She paused momentarily. “Can I ask you a question now?” 

“Shoot.” 

“How far have you gone exactly? I know you never had sex with anyone, male or female, but I know you've at least kissed guys before. Anything else?” 

Clarke nodded. “Two guys,” she said. “I'm not sure the spin the bottle kiss in 8th grade counts, though. And Finn was… well, he was a douche. To answer your question… what are the bases again? I don't know much about baseball.”

“It varies,” Lexa said. “Let's say first is French kissing, second is boob action, third is below the waist, and a homerun is, well, that's obvious.”

Clarke nodded. “Okay, then I guess second? But over clothing.” 

Lexa made a noise low in her throat that sounded suspiciously like a growl. 

Clarke couldn't stop the grin. “Alexandria Woods, are you jealous?” 

“No,” Lexa said defensively. 

Clarke chuckled and tightened the arm she had around Lexa's waist. “How far did you get with… others?” 

Lexa snorted. “Others? There was just Costia. She's the only girl I've even kissed. And you know I've never kissed a guy.”

“I just didn't want to say her name and bring up bad memories,” Clarke said carefully. 

Lexa lifted her head and looked at Clarke as best she could in the quickly waning twilight. “That's sweet,” she said. “But you don't have to do that. I'm in a good place now. With you."

Clarke couldn't resist leaning in and kissing Lexa softly. “I'm glad. Now, answer the question.”

Lexa hummed and replaced her head on Clarke's shoulder. “Um, second base as well. Only, under clothing.” 

Clarke suddenly understood Lexa's growl from before as she struggled to keep her own in. She buried her face in her girlfriend’s neck instead, inhaling her scent. Lavender. Always lavender. Clarke reveled in the calming scent. 

It had dipped down into the low sixties by the time the stars were really visible, so Clarke jumped off the table and grabbed two blankets from the car. She placed the heavier one on the tabletop for them to lay back on and wrapped the other around both of them as they laid back against the tabletop. Clarke pointed out the major constellations that she remembered--Ursa Major, Cassiopeia, Pegasus, Pleiades, and Orion. “I'm pretty sure that's Mars,” Clarke said pointing to what appeared to be a star but with a yellow-orange hue. 

Lexa asked questions, some Clarke knew the answer to and some she didn't.

“Oh, see that bright thing moving across the sky like a plane but much smaller?” Clarke said. “That's the ISS. International space station.” 

“I wonder what it's like up there,” Lexa mused. “Living in space. I bet the food is shit. But the views must be awesome. Oh, and the moonwalks.” 

Clarke laughed. “I don’t think it’s like Zenon,” she said. 

“I loved that movie as a kid,” Lexa said. “I know it was made before we were born, but I must have watched it a thousand times.”

“Me, too,” Clarke said, excited. “Looking back, I think I had a crush on Kirsten Storms. That movie is why my dad started taking me stargazing.”

Lexa cuddled closer to Clarke, mostly for warmth but also to give the girl comfort as she remembered her dad. 

They talked about old favorite movies and other details of their childhoods--Clarke revealed that she'd always wanted a sibling and had had an imaginary sister while Lexa revealed that she'd had a pet hamster named Sprinkles that fell victim to the vacuum cleaner. “RIP Sprinkles.”

At some point, they fell into a comfortable silence, just looking up at the stars and enjoying being in one another’s company. 

It was just past ten thirty when Clarke felt Lexa shiver. The desert was quick to cool once the sun went down, so Clarke shifted her body carefully on the table so that she face the girl. She kissed her, softly at first, but with their earlier talk about sex, they were both a bit worked up, so the kiss quickly became heated. 

Clarke felt a shiver down her own spine, but this time not from cold. Lexa’s hands were already dipping below the bottom hem of her shirt to rest on the bare skin of her waist, then dragging upwards along her ribs and around to her back. 

“Can we get to second base?” Clarke murmured against Lexa’s lips.

Lexa let out a laugh. “Okay,” she said. Her hand immediately retraced its earlier path to Clarke’s ribs, only she continued upwards until she cupped Clarke’s bra-encased breast in her hand. 

“Fuck,” Clarke let out. “I was supposed to feel you up first,” she pouted as she felt Lexa’s hand squeeze gently, testing the weight of Clarke’s breast in her hand. 

“Says who?” Lexa asked, her lips now trailing a path along Clarke’s jaw. “Because it looks like I beat you to it.” She swiped her thumb across the front of Clarke’s bra where she could feel the nipple pebbled beneath the lacy material. She was suddenly both grateful and annoyed at the fact that it was dark. She wanted to see this lacy bra, wondered what color it was, but at the same time, anyone could happen upon them at any moment. It added a thrill to the moment. They weren’t directly in view of the road and they would hear a car approaching, but it was still exhilarating. 

Clarke, not one to be outdone, copied Lexa’s actions, only she took it a step further. After pausing to allow the girl to protest if she didn’t want Clarke to continue, the blonde slipped her hand beneath the fabric of Lexa’s favored sports bra. She palmed the fleshy mound as Lexa gasped and sucked on a particularly sensitive spot just below Clarke’s ear that made her instinctively clench her thighs together as she sought relief. Lexa’s breasts were smaller than her own, but to Clarke, they were the perfect handful and the pebbled nipple against her fingertips made her swoon. 

“Clarke,” Lexa whispered, her breath tickling Clarke’s ear and her hand pressing firmer against Clarke’s breast. “I wish I could see you.” 

“I know,” Clarke said, her fingers playing across Lexa’s nipple. “I wish that, too.” 

“But we should stop before someone catches us,” Lexa said, but she dipped her fingertips beneath Clarke’s bra as she did so.  _ We should stop before I come in my pants _ , Lexa thought to herself. She felt Clarke’s har nipple with her fingertips. 

“Fuck, Lex,” Clarke whimpered. She really wished they weren’t in public right then. She had a feeling they wouldn’t have kept their clothes on for long. “You’re killing me.” 

“You started it,” Lexa pointed out, catching Clarke’s earlobe gently between her teeth. 

The sound of an approaching vehicle on the gravel made them both jump in surprise and rush to fix their clothing. They’d just managed to pull apart to a respectable distance when a park vehicle circled nearby. 

“Park is closing in ten minutes, ladies,” a male voice called out from the driver’s seat. “Everyone needs to be out by then.”

“Okay, thank you,” Clarke called out to the worker who then kept driving. 

“That was too close,” Lexa said, hopping down from the table. 

“Agreed. But it was fun.”

Lexa laughed and they tossed the blankets in the car. Clarke had Lexa home by eleven-thirty, plenty of time to get herself home by curfew. Though, she doubted her mother was even awake. Better not chance it. 

“Thank you for sharing that with me, Clarke,” Lexa said once Clarke had pulled into the driveway and shut off the ignition and headlights. “It was really special.” 

“The stargazing or the boob grabbing?” Clarke asked with a smirk. 

Lexa reached out and playfully punched Clarke’s shoulder. “I was trying to be sentimental, you doofus. Way to kill the mood.” 

Clarke laughed. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” she said. She leaned across the center console and caught Lexa’s lips in her own. They kept this kiss chaste, mostly because Clarke was terrified that Lexa’s huge dad was watching them like a hawk. Lexa didn’t tell her that he probably was. 

“Goodnight, Clarke,” Lexa said a few moments later. 

“Goodnight, Lex.” 

Clarke waited until she saw that Lexa had gotten inside safely, then started her car back up. When she got home, she saw that she had a text message from Lexa. 

 

LEXA (11:38PM):

_ >> It was totally the boob grabbing ;) <3 _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grand Springs Observation Deck is completely make up, but is based on a place close to where I grew up in Georgia. Every detail about the place, save the desert part, is true about the place in Georgia, which has since closed down. *sad!face* I know stargazing is cheesy, but I LIKE IT and it's a favorite past time of mine. Also, I fully believe modern day Clarke would be obsessed with the stars. 
> 
> Also, If you know what 'Zenon' is, you are officially cool in my book. :)
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: I had to ban my wife from looking at comments on chapter 13 because she kept cursing people out. To distract herself, she started making my favorite meal (fugazza) so I'm #winning. My wife is better than yours. ;)


	15. Of Boobs and Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Boobs. More specifically, Clarke Griffin's boobs. Also, a revelation and protective!Raven. Small bit of angst that is quickly rectified because I can't take my bbs not happy and disgustingly in love. Ranya scene at the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies! Apologies that I never got around to replying to comments on the last chapter. I had a busy last two days! Anyway, I adore each and every one of you and I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint. It's another longer one (in trying to make them longer now). :)

The first time Lexa finally saw Clarke’s breasts in the flesh was a complete accident.

It was a little over two weeks after their first date and Clarke had asked Lexa to come over one day after school so they could work on their AP Lit homework (Shakespeare, ugh) together. Then, they would order food and watch Netflix. Lexa rode her bike the few blocks and had turned into the driveway just as Abby was backing her car out of the garage.

Abby rolled down her window and waved at Lexa. “Hi, sweetie,” she said. “Clarke’s upstairs. Go on in through the garage. You can park your bike in there.”

Lexa nodded. “Thanks, Abby,” she said. She waved at Clarke's mom as she pulled away, then entered the garage. She leaned her bike against the wall and hit the button to close the garage door as she opened the door leading to the mud room. She hitched her school bag over her shoulder and kicked off her Chuck Taylors before making her way towards the stairs. As she neared the landing, she chuckled as she heard loud music coming from Clarke's room.

Halsey, Clarke’s favorite artist. Of course. And Clarke was singing along to ‘Gasoline.’

The door was open a good eight or so inches, so Lexa didn’t think to knock. (When would anyone learn?) She pushed the door open, ready to announce her presence, but the greeting died on her lips at the sight before her. Clarke was standing in front of her closet door barefoot in black skinny jeans and, well, nothing else. Her hair was pulled back in a messy French braid, so Lexa had a perfect side view of Clarke’s torso for a split second before the blonde screeched at the sudden movement of her door and turned to face the intruder, arms immediately coming up to cover her chest.

“Oh, my god, Lexa you scared the shit out of me!” Clarke cried, heart racing. She hadn’t even realized her girlfriend had left her own house.

Lexa finally snapped out of her state of awe. “I’m sorry!” she said, averting her eyes to look the ceiling and willed her body to not get aroused. She thought of soccer, AP Calculus, anything other than the perfectly shaped--oh! Her sister and Raven! That should work.

Clarke let out a breath, her nerves calming when she fully realized that she wasn’t about to be murdered in her own home. Then she noticed Lexa’s struggle and decided to have a little fun. She turned off the music and asked, “Is my mom still home?”

Lexa shook her head, still staring at the ceiling. “She was leaving as I got here,” she said, willing Clarke to put a shirt on. Please, for the love of god, put a shirt on.

Clarke moved to stand right in front of Lexa, only about a foot between them, hands poised on her hips. “Lexa, you can look at me.”

Lexa hesitated. “I can?”

Clarke nodded. “You’ve already felt me up,” she reminded.

Lexa’s head moved down, but her gaze didn’t immediately drop to Clarke’s chest. Instead, she met her eye, and Clarke took notice of her girlfriend’s flushed cheeks and dilated pupils. She reached out and placed her hands on Lexa’s hips in reassurance, nodding in additional permission. She wanted to take this next step.

Lexa swallowed hard and licked her suddenly dry lips as she allowed her eyes to drop to Clarke’s chest, taking careful note of every detail, of every freckle and every curve. Pink. She was right. Clarke’s nipples were a soft pink against the creamy paleness of her skin. And they were hard, stiff peaks that could only be due to arousal. It was far from chilly in the room.

Lexa brought her own hands up to rest on Clarke’s waist, her thumbs brushing her bottom ribs as she returned her gaze to Clarke’s. “You’re so beautiful,” she said, voice barely audible. She leaned in and kissed her, hands sliding around to her back so she could pull her flush against her. She’d felt Clarke’s chest pressed against her own as they kissed before, and she’d felt her up several times since stargazing, but something about knowing that Clarke’s was topless and braless made her whimper in pleasure.

“You can touch, too,” Clarke said against her lips after several moments. “But I require payment, first.” She pulled back and had a cheeky grin on her face.

“Payment?” Lexa asked, voice cracking.

Clarke nodded slowly. She tugged at the hem of Lexa’s shirt. “In the form of your shirt and bra.”

Oh. Lexa groaned. “Clarke, we’re supposed to be working on our homework,” she protested, but she was already grabbing the hem of her own shirt and tugging it up and off. It fell to the ground in a silent heap.

Clarke just buried her face in Lexa’s neck, running her hands over her abs. “Later,” she murmured against her pulsepoint. “Bra.”

Lexa didn’t even hesitate. She gripped the bottom of the sports bra and moved back from Clarke just long enough to pull it over her head and toss it aside. She wasted no time in recapturing Clarke’s lips and pulling the blonde flush against her. They both let out sounds of pleasure when they felt their breasts pressed against one another with nothing in between them.

Clarke felt her knees weaken and she tugged Lexa towards her full sized bed, never breaking their kiss. She sat on the edge and leaned back, pulling Lexa over her. They had to momentarily stop kissing to get settled, but soon, Clarke was on her back with Lexa on top of her. They kissed again.

Lexa settled most of her weight on her knees, one on either side of Clarke’s thigh, and one hand so she could run her other hand along Clarke’s side, tracing each rib carefully before continuing up to rest against the bottom curve of her breast. Clarked hummed into her mouth in pleasure and that was all the encouragement that Lexa needed to fully cup Clarke’s breast in her hand, feeling the nipple against her palm. It wasn’t the first time, but it was the first time without the hinderance of clothing.

Lexa kissed a wet path down Clarke’s neck as she moved her hand, her thumb brushing against a straining nipple.

“Fuck, Lexa,” Clarke groaned. One hand gripped the sheet beneath her and the other threaded through Lexa’s hair.

Lexa didn’t let up, bringing her index finger into the mix and pinching the nipple lightly, testing Clarke’s reaction. Clarke hissed in pleasure, her back arching into the touch.

“Clarke, can I kiss you?” Lexa asked, not wanting to push her too far. “Here?” she added, her thumb raking across the nipple again.

“Yes, Lexa, please,” Clarke groaned, feeling desire pool between her legs. She shifted and was glad to feel that Lexa was equally as aroused judging by the hard length of her pressing against her thigh. This time, neither one of them shied away from the contact.

Actually, Lexa pressed her hips forward into Clarke’s thigh as she closed her lips over her nipple. Both of them gasped in pleasure. Lexa dragged her tongue over her nipple as she shifted her weight again, wanting to feel Clarke’s other breast in her hand. This time, when she settled, she was between Clarke’s legs.

Clarke willingly spread her legs further apart to accommodate her girlfriend’s hips, then locked them around her waist. The action brought Lexa’s erection perfectly in-line with her aching heat. “Oh, fuck,” she gasped at the feel of Lexa, fully hard and pressing against her heated center.

Lexa stilled immediately, then lifted her head from Clarke’s breast and swallowed as she met Clarke’s eye. The blue irises were nearly non-existent, replaced by dark pupils, dilated with overwhelming desire. Her cheeks and chest were flushed.

Lexa imagined she looked quite similar in that moment.

Clarke gripped Lexa’s cheeks in her hands and pulled her in for another searing kiss. As she did, their naked torsos pressed together and their hips began moving at the same time in response, creating a steady rhythm. Lexa never stopped kneading Clarke’s breasts and tugging gently on her nipples.

Lexa knew she should stop before it was too late and she made a mess, but Clarke was so damn sexy, and the noises she was making made her never want to stop. She could tell the blonde was dangerously close as well.

“You feel so good against me,” Clarke groaned out when they had to break the kiss for air.

“Clarke, I’m not gonna last long,” Lexa warned.

Clarke whimpered when Lexa pressed hard against her, the inseam of her jeans pressing against her clit through the thin material of her underwear, hitting just the right angle. “Me, neither,” Clarke sighed out, pushing her hips up harder. She suddenly wished that there was nothing between them, no clothes keeping them apart. “Make me come, Lex.”

Lexa grunted and whimpered at the same time at Clarke’s words, willing herself to hold back just a bit longer. Maybe she could just keep going until Clarke came and then stop before she made a mess in her compression shorts. Yeah, that’s what she’d do. She just had to hold on a bit longer and...

Only, mother nature had other plans. She managed to keep her own orgasm as bay long enough for Clarke to tense and cry out in ultimate pleasure, but the sound of her coming and the feel of her thighs gripping her hips oh so tightly made Lexa lose it in a matter of seconds. She cried out a multitude of obscenities as she felt her balls tighten, then release in her pants.

Fuck.

Lexa slumped against Clarke with as her orgasm finished, panting.

Clarke’s breathing was equally erratic and Lexa could hear the pounding of her heartbeat as she lay on her chest. They lay like that for several minutes as they allowed their breathing to return to normal. Clarke idly played with a strand of Lexa’s hair where it had fallen across her chest.

Finally, Lexa moved to Clarke’s side, not wanting to crush her, and looked down at her. “So, that happened,” she said quietly.

Clarke giggled, actually legitimately giggled, and brushed Lexa’s hair over her shoulder. “It did,” she said, voice husky. Her eyes shone brightly with satisfaction. “But next time, I get to be on top.”

“Next time?” Lexa said.

Clarke nodded. “I didn’t get to touch you,” she said, bringing a hand to Lexa’s breast and cupping her experimentally. Lexa gasped as she pinched her nipple. “It’s only fair.”

Lexa gave a nervous laugh. “I’m sure it is, but next time will have to wait,” she said, grabbing Clarke’s teasing hand and bringing it up to her lips. “I already made a mess.” Her cheeks burned again, but this time with embarrassment rather than desire.

Clarke’s eyes flickered downward and she knew that it wasn’t the time to tease her. Instead, she leaned forward and kissed Lexa’s nose, then slid off the bed and picked up the shirt she’d worn to school from the floor and slid it on over her head. “You can shower if you need to,” she said. “I, ah, need one two.” She shot Lexa a coy smile, then rooted in her dresser for a fresh pair of underwear.

Lexa stood and picked up her own shirt, pulling it on as she tried not to stare at the dark purple fabric now clutched in Clarke’s hand. “I do, but I also don’t have anything to change into,” she explained. “These shorts are probably ruined.” There was no way she was going to ask her mom if she knew how to get that type of stain out of fabric.

Clarke looked guilty. “Sorry,” she said.

Lexa kissed her softly. “Worth it,” she said.

“I, um, can lend you a pair of sweatpants,” Clarke said, stooping down to pull open the bottom drawer of her dresser. “They should be loose enough. They’re loose on me and my hips are a bit wider than yours.”

Deliciously wider, Lexa thought, but managed to not say aloud. Clarke handed her a pair of what was likely once black pants, now faded to a gray color with several washings. They were soft and well-worn.

“I don’t have any compression shorts, though,” Lexa said, testing the weight of the fabric. It was thick, but wouldn’t do anything to hide her bulge.

Clarke kissed her again. “You know you don’t have to wear them around me, right? They look incredibly uncomfortable.”

Lexa shrugged. “You get used to them,” she said.

Clarke nodded. “But for real, you don’t need to wear them. I mean, I get why you would if my mom is home or if we’re around other people, but if it’s just us, no need.”

“Thanks,” Lexa said. “Do you have a bag or something I can put my clothes in?” she asked. Clarke nodded and looked around. She’d just been to Target the other day… ah-ha! She emptied out the Target bag and handed it to Lexa who took it with a grateful smile.

“You can shower in my bathroom,” Clarke said as she grabbed another pair of sweats and a t-shirt from her closet. She decided to forgo a bra. “I’ll use the guest bathroom down the hall.”

They both showered quickly, washing away the evidence of their earlier activities, and redressed. Clarke was glad to see that Lexa had also forgone her discarded bra.

“We should probably talk about what just happened,” Lexa said when Clarke rejoined her in the room.

Clarke nodded and sat on her bed, facing Lexa. She struggled to not think about the fact that Lexa was wearing her pants while going commando. And she had to actively keep her gaze from trailing downward towards Lexa’s lap. “Probably,” she said. “That was unexpected to say the least. But a logical next step in this relationship. Is that technically third base? Or like, second and a half?”

Lexa let out a laugh, always grateful that Clarke could insert humor in awkward conversations like this. “I think you mean shortstop,” Lexa said with a smile. “I think third is, um, oral.” God damn her tendency to blush! “Or at least actual touching below the belt. Like, with hands on bare skin.”

Clarke grinned and kissed her cheek. “Good to know,” she said. Then she reached down and grabbed her bag from the floor and pulled out her AP Lit three-ring binder. “So, Julius Caesar.”

“Et tu, Brute,” Lexa quoted.

The rest of their evening was quite tame in comparison and consisted of Shakespeare-driven insanity, way too much pizza, and relatively innocent cuddling as they watched episodes of Bob’s Burgers on Netflix.

Later, once Lexa had gone home and Clarke was lying in bed with the lights off, she found herself thinking about girlfriend and what they’d done in her bed. She was immediately flooded with new feelings of desire as she thought about the way Lexa had felt on top of her. Between her legs. She wondered how it would feel without any clothing at all.

Damn. It was getting hot. She tossed off her covers and shucked off her long pants so that she was just in her underwear and camisole, hoping her ceiling fan would help cool her off.

Nope.

As she thought about Lexa’s lips around her nipple, her tongue teasing the tip, she found her hand slipping beneath the already damp material of her panties, teasing her folds. She was soaked.

Clarke gave in to the temptation and dipped her fingers between the sodden lips of her sex to gather moisture before moving up to circle her clit. Clarke was no stranger to masturbation, especially in the most recent weeks, but she now had new knowledge of how it felt for someone else to make her come.

That thought dominated her mind as she remembered the feel of Lexa’s erection against her center and it didn’t take long until her fingers quickened against her clit and she was biting the fleshy part of her palm to keep from crying out from the orgasm that ripped through her body. It was almost as strong as the one she’d experienced earlier in the day. Almost.

She slumped back on her bed as her orgasm faded, her fingers still gently rubbing circles over her clit in a comforting gesture. Her breathing was ragged and her entire hand was soaking wet with her juices, but she didn’t care.

The next day, Lexa noticed her palm and asked about the bruise that was already forming. Clarke wasn’t sure she could get any redder.

 

***

 

Octavia and Lincoln were let in on the secret after Lexa was hit in the groin by a wayward foot during a chicken fight in the Blakes’ pool.

There was a month left of school, but the temperatures were already reaching well into the ninetys in the afternoons. Thank you, desert life. The Blakes had just opened their pool and Octavia had immediately invited everyone over that Friday evening to enjoy the water. The only one absent was Anya, who had a paper to work on.

“Chicken fight!” Octavia had called out and Clarke had immediately jumped onto Lexa’s shoulders. Lincoln was the other base, Octavia on his shoulders. Raven was the referee.

Several rounds in, Clarke managed to push Octavia off Lincoln’s shoulders with a triumphant scream, which quickly turned into a squeal as she was unceremoniously dumped into the water. She surfaced, sputtering, and turned to ask Lexa what she was doing when she noticed her tears in her girlfriend’s eyes and a pained expression on her face.

“Lex, what’s wrong?” she immediately asked, swimming over to make sure she was okay.

She couldn’t speak and just shook her head.

“I think I kneed her in the stomach,” Lincoln said as he swam closer. “I’m sorry, Lexa.”

Clarke shared a look with Raven, who was at Lexa’s side as she tried to catch her breath. Clarke looked at Lincoln and saw a look of confusion on his face, realizing that he knew he hadn’t kneed a stomach. Octavia just looked concerned.

“It’s okay,” Lexa breathed out, voice strained. “I just, uh, got the wind knocked out of me. No more chicken fights, though.”

Everyone agreed and they dispersed, leaving Lexa and Clarke alone in the corner of the pool. “Are you really okay?” Clarke asked, hugging her, careful to keep her lower half away from Lexa’s.

Lexa nodded into Clarke’s neck. “It just hurts,” she said. “It’ll go away soon. The cold water actually helps.” She took a deep breath. “I think Lincoln knows, though. There’s no way he could have kneed my stomach.”

Clarke nodded. “He looked confused when he said that.”

“I should just tell them,” Lexa said. “They’re going to figure it out anyway, and it’s probably killing Raven that she can’t say anything to Octavia.”

Clarke laughed. “Probably.”

So that’s when Lexa told Octavia and Lincoln. Octavia hugged her and said she’d kick anyone’s ass who tried to mess with her and glared at her boyfriend. Lincoln held up both hands. “I didn’t know!” he protested. They all laughed.

It was as they were sitting around the pool after darkness had fallen that Lincoln finally spoke up again. “I really am sorry about earlier,” he said, looking at Lexa. “But why did it hurt so much? I’ve been kneed by this one--” he indicated Octavia with a tilt of his head--”in the pool too many times to count and it never hurt like that.”

Lexa bit her lip, looking at Clarke for support. “Um, I sustained a, um, injury last fall and it made things… sensitive. I’m healed, but, you know…” she trailed off with a shrug.

“What kind of injury?” Trust Raven to pry.

“Raven, don’t,” Clarke said, but Lexa gripped her hand.

“It’s okay, Clarke,” Lexa said. “It’s in the past. I was attacked by a group of transphobic fuckheads. It didn’t matter that I’m not actually trans. All they saw was a girl with a penis and made assumptions. They, um, kicked me repeatedly.”

“What the fuck?!” Raven yelled, looking disgusted. “Are you kidding me?” Octavia and Lincoln looked on in horror.

Lexa gave a sad look. “No,” she said. “I wish I was. That’s why we moved here once I’d healed completely.”

“What happened to them?” Octavia asked. “The people that did that?”

Lexa look down at her lap, fighting tears. Clarke answered for her. “Nothing,” she said. “The police refused to press charges because they were the kids of some high-ranking officials in the Senate or something.”

“That’s why we had to leave,” Lexa said. “My parents decided to move us out here because it’s where Anya was already going to school.”

“That’s not right!” Raven said. “They deserve to be thrown in jail for that shit.”

Lexa shrugged. “I agree, but what can you do?”

“Oh, I can do plenty,” Raven huffed. “I can… I can hack into the school’s database and change their grades. Oh, or hack into their social media accounts and post admissions of guilt, then change their passwords so they can’t delete it!”

“Raven, stop,” Clarke said, noting the distressed look on Lexa’s face. “None of that will bring justice.”

“What about a high-ranking, well-respected judge in D.C.?” Lincoln asked.

Octavia’s eyes widened and a smile grew on her face. “Your aunt?”

Lincoln nodded. “My aunt is a judge for the US Court of Appeals,” he explained. “And she’s very invested in social activism. She can’t actually press charges, but she knows a lot of high-powered people. I’m sure she could do something.”

Lexa shook her head. “No, please. I just want to keep everything in the past. Really, I don’t want to bring it all up again.” Clarke kissed her temple in a calming manner.

“But, Lexa,” Raven said. “They could actually pay for their crimes.”

“Raven, let it go,” Clarke said, throwing her friend a warning look. “She said no.”

“If you change your mind, it’ll just take a phone call,” Lincoln said. “But I respect your decision and I won’t bring it up again.”

“Thank you, Lincoln,” Lexa said. She glanced up at Clarke. “I think I’m going to call it a night. I can call my mom to come get me if you want to stay longer. It was only just past nine.”

Clarke shook her head. “It’s okay,” she said. “I need to shower this chlorine off, anyway.”

They said their goodnights and the two walked hand in hand around to the front of the house where Clarke’s car was parked. They were silent most of the way to Lexa’s house until Clarke couldn’t stand it any longer.

“You know, it may not be a bad idea to at least talk to Lincoln’s aunt,” she said carefully. “I mean, she could just give you information on what you could do to seek justice.”

Lexa shook her head. “Clarke, please,” she said. “There’s no justice to be brought. All it would do is get my hopes up and then nothing would come of it. I’ve been down this road before.”

Clarke pulled into Lexa’s driveway and put the car in park. “But you didn’t have a high-ranking official on your side before,” she pointed out. “I mean, a US Court of Appeals judge sure beats a city cop.”

“Clarke, I said don’t,” Lexa said tersely. She shoved open the door and got out. “You of all people should understand.” She slammed the door and walked quickly into the house, leaving behind a stunned Clarke.

Fuck.

Clarke mentally slapped herself. She should have just dropped it. At least given her time to think about it. She understood Raven’s anger and malice before. She wanted nothing more than those pricks to get what they deserved.

She still should have backed off, and she knew that. So why didn't she?

Sighing, she was about the put the car in reverse and think up ways to tell Lexa she was sorry that included lots of Lexa’s favorite things when she noticed Lexa’s bag still on the floor of the passenger seat. She quickly turned off the ignition and grabbed the bag, knowing Lexa’s wallet and school books were in it. She rang the doorbell and wasn’t all surprised when it was Iris who answered the door. Clarke held up the bag.

“Lexa left this in my car,” she explained.

Irish took it and nodded. “Thank you,” she said. “Can you explain why she slammed her door without acknowledging me?”

Clarke gave her a guilty look. “I may have, um, said something stupid that I regretted as soon as I said it,” she admitted. “About D.C.”

She saw Iris’ eyes widen, then narrow in disappointment.

“I’m really sorry,” Clarke said, suddenly feeling the urge to explain herself. “Lincoln, that’s Octavia’s boyfriend, mentioned that he had an aunt who’s a high powered judge in D.C. and, well, I pushed her too hard to talk to her, and I shouldn’t have.”

Irish sighed and ushered Clarke inside, shutting the door behind her. “It was hard for Lexa to put all of that behind her,” she said.

“I know,” Clarke said. “I’m sorry.”

Iris nodded and handed Lexa’s bag to Clarke. “You should take this to her and tell her that yourself.”

“Thank you,” Clarke said, taking the bag and heading towards Lexa’s room down the long hallway. She knocked on the closed door and listened for an answer.

“I don’t want to talk, Mom,” came the reply.

“It’s me,” Clarke said.

“I still don’t want to talk,” Lexa repeated.

“You left your bag in my car,” Clarke called out, using any tactic she could to get Lexa to open the door.

She heard the girl heave a heavy sigh, then move towards the door. She yanked it open and held her hand out for the bag, glaring at Clarke. Her eyes were red and it was obvious she'd been crying.

Clarke felt like such an ass.

Clarke handed her the bag, then used her best puppy dog eyes on Lexa. “I'm sorry. I'm a bitch and shouldn't have pushed you. It's not my place and my opinion doesn't matter.”

Lexa felt herself giving in. She leant heavily on her doorframe and regarded Clarke carefully. She knew the girl only had her best interest at heart, but it had still pissed her off when she'd kept pushing the issue. But she cared. “You're wrong,” Lexa said softly.

Clarke felt her stomach clench but she stayed silent.

“Your opinion does matter,” Lexa said. “I just… I can't think about any of it now. Not when I've just started being happy again.”

Clarke licked her dry lips. “Got it. I won't bring it up again. I promise.”

“You're also not a bitch,” Lexa said, dropping her bag just inside her door and stepping forward to hug Clarke.

Clarke melted into the hug, glad Lexa had seemed to forgive her. At least for now. “I can be sometimes,” Clarke said. “I don't mean to be, though. Especially not to you.”

“I know.”

“I really like you and care about you,” Clarke said, refusing to let Lexa go.

“I know that, too,” Lexa whispered, aware that her mom was hovering nearby. “I care about you, too.”

They stood like that until Iris cleared her throat and asked Clarke if she wanted dessert.

 

***

 

 

[RANYA-technically Ranya but I suggest reading because Raven is a dork] 

 

 

Raven lay on her stomach on her bed later that night, researching. It didn't take her long to figure out where Lexa had previously attended school (a private school? Really?) and learn that she'd been a star soccer player and cross country runner. No surprise there.

And it didn't take long to stumble upon police records of the assault, which named the five offenders. They were technically confidential, but that was just a small hurdle for Raven Reyes. Slightly illegal, but she conveniently ignored that.

And then, it didn't take long for Raven to hunt down the shits on social media.

She was probably about to do something stupid, but she couldn't let them get away with what they'd done. They should be in jail, serving time for battery and assault with a deadly weapon. (Raven had read about the scissors and nearly vomited.)

Instead, the assholes were living their lives like nothing had happened, while Lexa had had to move clear across the country just to feel safe again.

Bastards.

She was just about to dive into a game of vengeance when her phone buzzed on her bedside table. She thought about ignoring it, but thought it may be Clarke needing to talk, so she glanced at the screen.

She had a message from Anya.

She snatched her phone up and unlocked it.

ANYA (10:07PM):  
>> I need a break from this damn paper. Distract me, Reyes.

Raven grinned. She wanted a distraction? She'd give her one. She quickly shut her laptop and turned off the main light in her room before clicking on the dimmer lamp on her nightstand. Then she pulled the ponytail holder out of her hair and shook her head. She'd already changed into her pajamas, which consisted of a pair of black cotton hipster panties and a white ribbed knit tank top. She walked to the large mirror on the back of her closet door and posed, the hand not holding onto her phone lifting the hem of her shirt suggestively. She snapped a photo and quickly sent it before she could lose her nerve.

Within seconds, she saw the typing bubble appear, telling her that Anya was already replying.

ANYA (10:11PM):  
>> FUCKING HELL RAVEN

Raven replied with the angel emoji.

ANYA (10:12PM):  
>> Not even close.

RAVEN (10:12PM):  
>> Turn about is fair play. Your turn.

ANYA (10:13PM):  
>> My turn for what?

RAVEN (10:14PM):  
>> A sexy pic. Duh! I showed you mine you show me yours.

Two minutes later, her phone buzzed. A picture of Anya appeased but she just looked annoyed. Still sexy, though. The caption said “this is my fuck you face,” and Raven snorted.

RAVEN (10:20PM):  
>> *wolf whistle* and no it's not. I know what your ‘fuck you’ face looks like ;)

ANYA (10:22PM):  
>> I'm not sexting you.

RAVEN (10:23PM):  
>> Damn *pouts*

ANYA (10:24PM):  
>> Mature.

RAVEN (10:26PM):  
>> You want mature? My mom is working graveyard so I'm all alone. Why don't you come keep me safe from the boogie man? ;)

ANYA (10:27PM):  
>> You just want sex.

Raven groaned. Yes she wanted sex but she also wanted more. She wanted to hang out with her and go on dates with her and do all that gross relationship-y stuff with her.

Fuck. She should listen to Clarke. She should stop texting Anya and forget all about her before she was in too deep.

RAVEN (10:31PM):  
>> Duh.

Dammit! Why did she send that? That was the opposite of forgetting about her.

ANYA (10:33PM):  
>> What if your mom comes home early or something?

Raven snorted. As if that would ever happen. Or even mattered.

RAVEN (10:36PM):  
>> First, my mom is on shift until 6am. Second, she wouldn't care. She'd have to care about me first to care that I had a girl over.

ANYA (10:37PM):  
>> She's your mom. Why wouldn't she care?

RAVEN (10:38PM):  
>> I'm pretty sure she only had me for the tax writeoff. Are you coming over or not?

ANYA (10:39PM):  
>> Okay but I'm not sleeping over.

Anya ended up sleeping over, waking shortly after 7am to the sound of something crashing in the hallway. She bolted upright in Raven’s bed, looking furiously around for their clothing. Where did her pants even end up?

“Go back to sleep,” Raven’s groggy voice said, pulling Anya back down on the twin mattress.

“That noise--”

“My mom,” Raven said. “Probably drunk or high. Or both. My door is locked. She's just going to pass out in her room and not wake up until this evening.”

The way Raven said those words so nonchalantly made Anya’s heart clench in her chest. She settled back beneath the blankets and studied Raven. “That's so sad.”

Raven shrugged. “It is what it is. One more year and I can leave and never look back. Can we not talk about it miss I'm not sleeping over?”

Anya grunted. “Whatever, miss it’s only sex.”

Raven looked at her sheepishly. “Oops?”

Anya rolled her eyes and decided not to say anything more just yet. Instead she checked her phone and noticed that she had an email from one of her professors. But before she could open it, her phone died. “Fuck,” she muttered under her breath.

“Charger is already plugged in over there,” Raven said around a yawn.

Anya found the cord and plugged in her phone but it was so dead that it blinked the angry red battery when she tried to turn it back on. “Can I borrow your laptop? I've been waiting on this reply from Dr. Lewis about my paper.”

Raven grunted and nodded, eyes still closed. “Password is anyaisababe, all one word, all lowercase.”

Anya paused with her hands poised over the keys. “Seriously?”

Raven grinned. “I change my password every week. Don't get too cocky.”

Anya rolled her eyes and typed in the password. Yep. It worked. She was about to open a new tab on the open facebook page when she paused, taking note of name on the profile. She knew that name. She knew that face.

“Raven what the fuck is this?”

Raven opened her eyes and sat up. “What?” she asked. Then she remembered what she'd been doing on her laptop just before Anya had texted her. “Oh, fuck. Um nothing. I was just--”

“Prying into things that are none of your business? How do you even know about this? Did you stalk my sister or something?”

“What? No,” Raven protested. “She told me. All of us. Last night at Octavia’s.”

Anya gave her a look like she didn't believe her.

“I'm serious. Lincoln accidentally kneed her… there and it didn't take long for Octavia and Lincoln to figure it out. They were completely cool, by the way. No need to go all super protector on them. Then she told us about what happened in DC and how they got off without punishment. It made me sick, so I offered to hunt them down and do some hacking to fuck with their lives…”

“And my sister agreed to this?”

Raven looked guilty. “Well, no, not exactly.”

“What did she say?” Anya asked, knowing exactly what Lexa would have said.

“Uh, she may have told me to just drop it.”

“Then why didn't you?” Anya asked, angry.

“I'm sorry,” Raven said. “I just, I got so mad that they got away with what they did and I just thought maybe… I don't know. I wasn't thinking clearly.”

“Obviously,” Anya muttered.

“I won't do anything without Lexa's permission,” Raven promised. “I'm glad you interrupted me last night. I get crazy protective of my friends, just ask Clarke when I caught her ex kissing another girl while they were still together. It wasn't pretty. I care about your sister and went into protective mode.”

Anya sighed. She understood protective mode. “She's my little sister,” she said. “I want nothing more than to get her justice, but doing so behind her back is not the way to go.”

“I know,” Raven said. “I won't. I promise.”

Anya stared at Raven, eyes narrowed. When the girl stared right back without flinching, she knew two things. First, Raven was being honest and would drop it. Second, she was in so much trouble. No one ever matched her stare like that, and honestly, it was incredibly hot.

Just. Sex. It was just sex.

But if it was just sex, why had she spent the night? She never spent the night. Ever. But it had been so easy to just curl herself around Raven and close her eyes…

“I should go,” Anya said suddenly, closing the laptop. “That paper won't write itself.” It was a lame excuse and they both knew it.

Raven watched as Anya redressed, biting the inside of her lip. When the older girl was slipping on her shoes, Raven couldn't stop the words that came out of her mouth. “Do you want to do something sometime? Just the two of us?”

Anya paused in her tying of her shoelaces and looked up at Raven, still unabashedly naked. The sheet covered her from the waist down, but her breasts were on full display. The look on her face was a mixture of shock and embarrassment, like she hadn't meant to speak those words aloud.

“Like a date?” Anya asked. Why did she feel hopeful that it was a safe? This was just sex!

Raven shrugged. “Like two people hanging out,” she said, leaving it vague on purpose.

Anya sighed and finished tying her shoes. “We said it was just sex.”

“I know,” Raven said.

“Hanging out just the two of us is not just sex.”

“I know,” Raven repeated.

Anya stood up straight and grabbed her bag. She turned to face Raven as she stood with her hand on the doorknob and sighed. “I have finals next week,” she said. “Next Saturday. Meet me at the Dropship Cafe at noon.”

Then she was gone.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love protective!Raven so much. <3
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> 
> Fun fact of the day: Story time! I just completed my 10th year of teaching, and my wife is a film studies professor and is teaching a few summer classes. Yesterday I sat in on her introductory class because we were doing lunch afterwards and I made a startling discovery… one of the students I taught my first year (I was 4th grade) is now in her class and I am having an existential midlife crisis. Need chocolate and a new tattoo.


	16. Horny, Klutzy Clarke Griffin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stollen kisses, ridiculous Raven, and, well, sex. Lots of sex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well. They made it! Clexa sexa ahead...

There were two weeks of school before finals and Clarke was on edge. She kept dropping things--her pencil in class not once but three times, her book in the hallway, her keys in the parking lot--and tripping over air. She got flustered in her honors chemistry class when answering a question aloud and accidentally said that chlorine was a noble gas when she knew it was a freaking halogen. Yikes.

All because she horny. And it was all Lexa's fault.

She and Lexa had been making out a lot since the dry humping incident. (Why did they call it dry humping?! She was far from ‘dry’ when it happened.) It had happened again, this time with Clarke on top, of course, two night prior.

Dammit, she wanted--needed--more!

“What’s up with you today?” Lexa asked as they snuck into their sound and light booth at the beginning of lunch.

Clarke didn’t answer. Not with words. Instead, she pushed Lexa against the closed door and kissed her fiercely, pressing their bodies together from chest to knee. Lexa grunted in surprise, but it turned into a moan of pleasure when Clarke angled her hips just so to press against her groin.

“Clarke, wait,” Lexa said, pulling back from the bruising kiss. “We’re at school.”

Clarke groaned, cursing the situation. Fucking school. She liked school, she really did. She was that kid that was always excited for the first day of school and always wanted to be there. Except for now. Now, she’d give anything to not be at school.

“I know,” Clarke said, voice husky. “Sorry, I just. God, Lexa, you drive me insane.”

“What did I do?” Lexa asked, grinning.

“You’re you,” Clarke replied. It really was as simple as that. She buried her face in Lexa's neck and placed her lips close to her ear. “I can't get you out of my head. I can't stop thinking about how good you feel in my arms and how much I want to be with you. I can't think about anything else but you.”

“Clarke, is that your way of saying you're horny?” Lexa teased, her hands slipping under Clarke's t-shirt and running along her sides.

“Yes,” Clarke hissed.

“Me, too,” Lexa admitted, voice deeper than normal. “God, Clarke. You're all I can think about, at night especially.”

Clarke grinned against Lexa's neck. “Yeah? Do you have to…?” She trailed off, but Lexa knew exactly what she was asking.

Lexa nodded, surprised to find that she wasn't embarrassed by the admission. Not with Clarke. “Yes.”

“Fuck, that's hot,” Clarke groaned. “I do, too. Sometimes twice.”

Lexa echoed Clarke's groan. “Clarke, you have to stop. I'm getting hard. It's uncomfortable.”

Clarke immediately stepped back, glancing downwards. The compression shorts could only hide so much and she noticed the slight bulge already forming. “Sorry,” she murmured. “I can't help it.”

Lexa shook her head. “It's okay. I just, we can't do anything here, so we need to stop now so it can go away by the time the bell rings. Hopefully.”

Clarke sighed and started to nod, but she stopped herself. A sly grin spread across her face. “Or,” she said, eyes flashing with mischief. “I could help you.”

Lexa narrowed her eyes. “Clarke Griffin I know you are not suggesting that we… do things while we're in school!”

Clarke shrugged. “I mean, yeah I was serious but I also forgot where exactly we were.” She looked sheepish and Lexa couldn't help but laugh. “I told you I'm out of my mind.”

“With how horny you are, I know,” Lexa said. She kissed her girlfriend softly. “It's kinda hot. No, it's really fucking hot. But we are in school.”

“Yes, yes. School. Right. How many more hours until dismissal?”

Lexa checked the clock on the wall. “Two hours and forty-six minutes.”

Clarke groaned. “So long.”

Lexa licked her lips. “Clarke?”

“Hmm?”

“Will your mom be home after school?”

Clarke shook her head. “She's on evenings this week,” she said slowly. “Won't be home until 8 or so. Why?”

Lexa swallowed. “I was thinking maybe I could come over and we could… see what happens.”

Clarke raised an eyebrow. “See what happens,” she repeated.

Lexa nodded. “I really like you, Clarke. And I… I never felt this way about anyone. I trust you and I want to be close to you. If you want to.”

Clarke had to focus on her breathing. “I do. And by close you mean…?”

Lexa nodded. “Sex. Everything. I think I'm ready.”

That made Clarke pause. “You have to know you're ready,” she said softly, brushing a stray lock of hair out of Lexa's face. “I need you to know, not just think.” Clarke knew she was ready.

Lexa nodded. “That's why I said we can just see what happens. I promise, I won't do anything or let you do anything I'm not ready for. But I trust you.”

Clarke smiled a big, toothy smile and leaned in to kiss her again.

Lexa was forced to stop it once again before it became too heated, though. “Bell is gonna ring in a few minutes,” she said softly.

Clarke nodded. “We should go ahead and get out of here,” she suggested. “I can't seem to help myself around you.”

Lexa nodded. “Good idea.”

They left the room, Lexa strategically holding her bag in front of her just in case. Neither one of them could concentrate the rest of the afternoon.

Clarke tripped in PE--over air again--and Lexa was immediately there to help her up while Raven verbally dragged her from the bleachers. Clarke flipped her off when the coach wasn't looking.

In the locker room, Clarke and Lexa both hastily changed while Raven looked at them with amused curiosity.

“Where's the fire?” she asked.

Clarke shrugged. “Just ready to be out of here,” she murmured. Lexa remained silent, willing her mind to not think about why they were in a rush.

“Okay, hot stuff,” Raven said. “I need a home today. My robotics meeting was cancelled and I've finished all my final projects. Except for some coding for my cyber security class, but I can do that at home.”

Clarke huffed. Taking Raven home would make them have to wait that much longer. But she couldn't very well say no. “Yeah, sure,” Clarke said. “What about O?”

Raven shook her head. “Lincoln has wheels now, remember?”

“Right,” Clarke said. The dismissal bell finally rang and they made their way to Clarke's car. She dropped Lexa off first (“I need a shower”) with the promise to text her when she was ready for her to come over.

Raven gave Clarke a cheeky grin as she pulled out of Lexa's driveway.

“What?” Clarke asked, trying to sound innocent.

“Someone's getting laid tonight,” Raven said in a singsong voice.

“What?” Clarke said. “No I'm not. Why would you say that?”

Raven scoffed. “Please, Griffin. Don't lie to me. You two have been eye-fucking all day. You're the opposite of discrete. You plan to do the Clexa sexa when she comes over, don't you?”

“Do the what?” Clarke asked, choking.

“The Clexa sexa. Get it? Clarke, Lexa… Clexa. And it rhymes with sexa.”

“Sexa isn't a word,” Clarke pointed out.

“Irrelevant detail,” Raven said. “So are you or aren't you? Or have you already? Oh my god. Did you do it and not tell me about it?!”

“Raven, stop,” Clarke said loudly. She rolled her eyes. “We haven't done anything yet. Well, I mean we haven't had sex. We've done… other stuff.”

Raven turned in the front passenger seat. “Tell me,” she practically begged. “I told you about Anya.”

Clarke snorted. “I didn't want to know about you and Anya,” she said.

“Pfft. Of course you did. Just give me something.”

“We haven’t had sex, but we've, you know, grinded.” Oh god. That sounded so crass and gross. What the hell, Clarke?

Raven didn't care. She squealed. “Oh my god. Look at you. My little Princess is all grown up.”

Clarke groaned. “Fuck you, Raven.”

“You wish,” Raven replied. “I have my eye on someone else, thank you very much. So, when are you two going to actually do the--”

“If you say ‘sexa’ I'm throwing you out of this car,” Clarke warned.

Raven glared but didn't say it. “Fine. When are you two going to make love?”

“Asshole,” Clarke said. “And I don't know. When we're both ready?”

“Are you?” Raven asked. “Ready?”

Clarke bit her lip and nodded. “Beyond,” she said honestly.

“Ha!” Raven cried out. “I knew it. You've been all klutzy Clarke today because you're horny for your girlfriend. Horny klutzy Clarke. I love it.”

Clarke groaned. “Okay, fine. Yes. I'm a big fucking horny mess, okay? But I'm not going to do anything about that until Lexa is ready.”

“Is she ready?”

Clarke shrugged as she parked at Raven’s complex. “Maybe. We're just going to see what happens.”

“Today?” Raven asked, grinning.

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Yes, today. So, please don't call, don't text, don't freaking show up in two hours and feign innocence.” She glared at Raven.

Raven didn't even try to pretend that she wouldn't do any one of those things. “Good luck, Princess. Don't fall off the bed or something like that.”

“You're such a dick sometimes,” Clarke said.

Raven opened her mouth, then quickly closed it and shook her head. “Nope. Too easy. Don't think I won't be grilling you first thing tomorrow morning.”

“Bye, Raven,” Clarke said loudly.

Raven just laughed and slammed the car door. She was still laughing when she disappeared into the building. Clarke groaned, not looking forward to that conversation tomorrow. But she couldn't think about that now.

She drove home and immediately jumped into the shower. She took special care shaving and using her favorite scented body wash. She washed every nook and cranny of her body. Twice.

After she finished showering, she quickly dried off and dressed. She kept is casual with jeans and a simple black t-shirt. She didn't want to put anymore pressure on this evening. It wasn't guaranteed that anything would happen. She hoped it did because she was so fucking horny, but she didn't want to push Lexa into something she wasn't ready for. And Lexa's state of mind and comfort were way more important than her own libido.

She pulled her hair back into a simple French braid and applied a small amount of make up. Just enough to brighten her face and hide her under eye circles. She hadn't slept much the previous night.

She stepped back to study herself in the mirror, knowing Lexa would be there at any moment. She'd texted her as soon as she'd finished dressing. Satisfied with her appearance, she glanced around her room to make sure no dirty underwear was left lying on the floor or anything else embarrassing like that. Nope.

The doorbell rang.

Palms sweaty, Clarke hurried down the stairs to open the door.

“Hey,” Lexa greeted her. Clarke was glad to see that the girl had also gone for the casual look with jeans and her signature ribbed knit tank top. This one was a forest green that matched her eyes. She'd left her hair down to curl loosely around her shoulders.

“Hi,” Clarke said with a side smile. She stepped aside to let Lexa in, then closed and locked the door behind them. She cleared her throat. “Do you want something to drink? Or a snack?”

Lexa shook her head. “I'm good,” she said. It was obvious that she was just as nervous.

They made their way to Clarke's room and sat next to one another on the bed, backs to the wall. Clarke’s full sized bed was pushed into one corner of the room to make space for her easel and art supplies.

Clarke leaned across Lexa to set her phone on her nightstand and plug in the charger before scrolling through to find a good Spotify playlist, as they typically did when they were together and not watching Netflix. The movement caused Clarke's breasts to press against Lexa's groin and her ass to hover directly in Lexa's line of sight.

Lexa grinned and brought her hand up to palm a fleshy, denim covered buttock, squeezing firmly.

Clarke gave Lexa a sassy grin over her shoulder that told Lexa that's exactly the reaction she was going for. The blonde quickly found a decent playlist and sat up, repositioning herself so that she straddled Lexa's lap. Lexa's hand never left Clarke's ass. In fact, her other came up to join in the fun, pulling Clarke closer as she kneaded the supple flesh. Clarke's ass was second only to her chest in Lexa's humble opinion.

Clarke hummed in pleasure as she felt the pressure of Lexa's length between her legs, just beginning to harden. She could already feel the wetness gathering between her own thighs, her underwear quickly becoming uncomfortable.

Then they were kissing. Deep, tongue-thrusting kisses that made Clarke whimper in the back of her throat and Lexa's hips to press upwards. Shirts were quickly discarded, followed quickly by bras.

“I love how sensitive you are here,” Clarke whispered into Lexa's ear as she used her thumb and forefinger to tease the pebbled tip of her breast.

“Fuck, Clarke,” Lexa hissed, head falling back and her chest arching out to give Clarke better access. In response se, Clarke quickly kissed her way down Lexa's chest until her lips were able to replace her fingers. She used her lips, tongue, and teeth on first one nipple and then the other until Lexa was whimpering beneath her, begging for mercy. She let go of her nipple with a resounding pop.

As soon as she was free, Lexa did some sort of ninja move and before she knew it, Clarke was on her back with Lexa hovering over her. “That was hot as fuck,” Clarke said, eyes wide and pupils dilated with arousal.

Lexa grinned. “You're hot as fuck,” she replied as she let her eye rake over Clarke's chest flushed with arousal and down her bare torso. Her jeans were particularly low cut today, revealing the majority of her lower abdomen. Lexa couldn't resist running her hand down Clarke’s side until she met the waistband of her jeans. She dipped her fingers ever so slightly beneath the fabric. She could feel the lacy band of her underwear.

“Lexa,” Clarke groaned, shifting her hips on the bed. “I need you to touch me.”

Lexa didn't hesitate in sliding her hand down Clarke's hip then to the heated place between her legs. She was still over her jeans. “Like this?” she asked, teasing the blonde with her fingertips on the inseam of her pants.

“No,” Clarke groaned. “Inside. Inside my pants.” To reiterate her need, she brought her on hand up to undo the button of her jeans. Lexa swatted her hand away before she could.

“Let me,” she said. She made quick work of the button and zipper. She surprised Clarke, however, when she didn't immediately slip her hand inside. Instead, she sat up and gripped each side of the waistband. “Can I take these off?”

Clarke nodded without hesitation and lifted her hips to aide Lexa's task. She was instantly glad she'd opted for the prettiest pair of panties that she owned. Light blue and lacy, the cheekies weren't the most comfortable thing to wear, but the look on Lexa's face when she saw them made it all worthwhile. Clarke grinned as she kicked off her jeans, causing them to land in a forgotten heap on the floor.

Lexa licked her lips as she stared at her girlfriend’s nearly naked form lying on the bed before her. She was absolutely perfect. She grinned when she saw a slightly darker spot forming on the lacy underwear between Clarke’s trim but supple thighs.

“Lexa,” Clarke groaned out when the brunette took too long studying her.

Lexa immediately laid back beside Clarke, kissing her at the same time her hand settled low on her flat stomach. She nearly came at the sound that Clarke made when her hand slid beneath the lace to cup her drenched center. She hadn't even dipped her fingers between her swollen lips and they were already soaked. Fuck, that was so hot.

“Jesus, Clarke,” she said when she did allow her middle finger to part her folds and dip into silken heat. “You're so wet.”

“I have been all week,” Clarke said. “Ever since Monday night.”

Lexa hummed as she remembered Monday night. Clarke topless and straddling her as they came together while still in their respective jeans.

“Tell me how to touch you, baby,” Lexa murmured into Clarke's ear. She was genetically a female but she was unfamiliar with that part of the female anatomy. “I don't know what I'm doing.” She'd have been embarrassed if it were anyone other than Clarke.

Clarke gasped. “Hmm, find my clit, near the top,” she said. “You'll know when you--oh! Yes, there.”

Lexa concentrated on the feel of the nub beneath her finger.

“Small circles,” Clarke said. “Light touch at first.”

Lexa did as Clarke told her. She was suddenly grateful that Clarke wasn't shy in telling her what she wanted. “What else?” Lexa asked.

“Inside,” Clarke gasped out. “Put a finger inside. Use your thumb on my clit.”

Lexa’s middle finger left her clit to seek Clarke’s entrance. She teased the opening slightly before allowing the digit to slide into the slick, wet cavern. “Fuck,” she whimpered when she felt Clarke’s walls clench on her slim finger. All she could think about was how those walls would feel surrounding her dick.

“Lexa,” Clarke gasped out. “Your thumb.”

Lexa complied, pressing her thumb to the nub and moving in tight circles.

“Yes,” Clarke said. “Keep going. A bit faster.”

Lexa sped up her ministrations as she peppered kisses down Clarke’s rapidly rising and falling chest. She stopped only briefly in her descent to tease her nipples with her lips and tongue, causing clarke’s back to arch and a moan to escape her lips. She continued kissing down along her smooth stomach. She teased her navel with her tongue. Then she licked a path from her navel along a hipbone. From this position, she could smell Clarke’s heady scent of arousal. If possible, it aroused her even more.

She stopped her movements.

Clarke whimpered in protest when Lexa's hand was removed from her panties. She opened her eyes and looked down. Lexa studied her wet fingers and licked her lips. Then she met Clarke's eye. She hooked a finger in either side of the lacy blue panties and asked a silent question.

Clarke nodded and lifted her hips in acquiesce. The lacy blue panties were quickly tossed aside.

Lexa’s lips returned to her hip as she settled her shoulders between Clarke's thighs. “I want to taste you,” she said. She kissed the inside of Clarke's thigh, using her tongue on the sensitive flesh.

“Yes,” Clarke hissed. “Please. I need to come.”

Lexa chucked at Clarke's desperation and brought her hands up to encourage Clarke's legs even further apart. She got her first look of a real woman up close. Clarke’s sex was dark pink and glistening with her juices. Her lips were puffy with arousal. As a natural blonde, Clarke was blessed with sparse, fine pubic hair to begin with, so she just shaved her bikini line and trimmed the rest.

She was perfect.

Lexa leaned in and got her first taste of Clarke Griffin. Sweet and bit salty, and warm. So, so warm. She tasted again. Then again. And in that moment, she knew, she was addicted to Clarke.

Clarke, meanwhile, had thrown her head back and clenched her hands in the comforter beneath her hips as Lexa's tongue tentatively explored her folds. “Jesus fuck,” Clarke choked out as she teased her entrance with the tip. All the while, she avoided the blonde’s clit.

Lexa felt powerful in her current position. She debated whether she should continue to tease or let her come. She lifted her gaze upwards and met Clarke's pleading eyes. Then she noticed that she had brought one hand up to massage her own breast, to pinch her own nipple.

Fucking hell.

She gave in and zeroed in on Clarke's clit, never breaking their eye contact.

Clarke nearly jackknifed at the feel of Lexa's tongue on her overly sensitive nub. She'd been on the verge of orgasm the moment she looked down the length of her own torso to focus on the brunette between her thighs. Then Lexa had looked up at her and moved her tongue to her clit.

She nearly screamed in pleasure.

“Fuck, Lexa,” she let out, voice hoarse. “I'm so close. Don't stop. Please don't stop.”

Lexa had no intention of stopping. Not until Clarke was too worn out to continue. She increased her efforts on Clarke's clit and brought one hand up to join in. She slid a finger into Clarke and moved it in and out in a steady rhythm.

“Another,” Clarke demanded, breathing heavy and irregular.

Lexa didn't have to ask what she meant. She slid a second finger in alongside the first and continued to pump.

“Yes,” Clarke hissed.

Lexa could tell she was close--so very close--and curled her fingers inward in a motion she’d read about in lesbian romance novels and fanfiction.

Clarke let out an almost obscene moan at the motion. Her thighs clenched and unclenched and her hips refused to stay still, but Lexa just followed the movements like a pro. “Fuck, Lexa,” she cried out as she felt the warmth begin to spread from her center outwards. “I'm coming. Oh god. Lexa. Yes.”

Lexa kept up her movements as she felt Clarke coming around her fingers, against her mouth. Things got really wet with the added evidence of Clarke's orgasm, not the Lexa was complaining. She licked and sucked until Clarke was pushing her away, too sensitive for any more.

Lexa quickly wiped her lips and chin on the bedspread and kissed up Clarke’s torso and chest, which was still heaving with her heavy breathing. She paused as she reached Clarke's face, unsure of whether or not she'd want to kiss her after she'd gone down on her.

Clarke made the decision for her, sliding her hand around the back of Lexa's neck and pulling her in for a ferocious kiss. Clarke could taste herself on Lexa's lips and tongue and it only fueled her desire. She pulled back and stared at a smug looking Lexa. “That's so much better than my own hands.”

Nailed it, Clarke thought as she watch Lexa's face morph from smug satisfaction to stunned arousal.

Clarke laughed and used Lexa's stunned state to flip her onto her back and she quickly straddled her hips. It was clear that Lexa was hard, more obvious than usual, and Clarke planted her hands on Lexa's abs.

“You're overdressed,” she mused, fingers playing with the button on Lexa's jeans. But she didn't move to undo it without Lexa's permission.

Lexa's eyes flashed with equal parts amusement and desire. She swallowed hard. “So do something about it.”

Clarke stilled and looked up at her. They both knew that if Lexa lost her pants, they'd have sex. “Are you sure?” she asked.

Lexa nodded and reached up to draw Clarke into a kiss. “I want you,” she said against Clarke's lips. “All of you.”

Clarke made quick work of the jean’s button and zipper. As she slid the material down Lexa's legs, she grinned. No wonder Lexa's erection had been more obvious than usual. She wore regular boxer shorts in navy blue instead of her compression shorts. She glanced up at Lexa, who shrugged. “Figured I should be comfortable.”

Clarke nodded and continued to rid Lexa of her jeans. Once she was left in just the boxers, Clarke settled on Lexa's upper thighs, licking her lips at the sight of the tented fabric. She ran her hands up Lexa's powerfully muscled thighs, over top the shorts. She met Lexa's eye as she let her left hand brush against the hardened length of her. Lexa sucked in a quick breath, but her look encouraged Clarke to continue. She did, dipping her hand below the waistband of the shorts. Her hand brushed the head of Lexa's penis, and she felt it twitch.

“Can I take these off?” Clarke asked.

Lexa nodded. The boxers quickly came off.

Clarke took in the sight of her girlfriend fully naked and hard below her.

Lexa held her breath as Clarke looked at her--all of her--for the first time. She knew she was a decent size, on the larger side of average in both length and girth, but still average. She waited.

Clarke licked her lips and met Lexa's eye as she wrapped her hand around her for the first time. “You're so beautiful,” she said, hoping the sincerity was conveyed in her voice.

It was. Lexa felt her eyes well up with tears. She sat up slightly and pulled Clarke in for another heated kiss. Clarke's hand never let go. In fact, it began to move in a steady rhythm. It wasn't the most comfortable without anything for lubricant to stop the friction, but Lexa wasn't about to stop her.

“Do you have a condom?” Clarke asked when they broke the kiss. “I mean, do you even need one? Could I even get pregnant?” Her face turned into a shocked and guilty expression. “Wait, is that a stupid question? I'm sorry if it is. I just--”

“Clarke it's fine,” Lexa reassured, cupping her cheek. “We’re about to have sex. It's a totally legitimate question.” She kissed her softly. “Yes, we need a condom. My sperm count is very low because of my estrogen levels, but it's still possible. And yes, I have some. In my bag.”

Clarke reached down to where Lexa's bag sat on the floor. She pulled it up and Lexa took out the box of condoms.

Clarke quirked an eyebrow. “It's opened already,” she said, grinning. She had an idea why it was.

Lexa turned red. “I, uh, had to practice putting them on,” she explained.

Clarke counted how many were still in the box. “It took you five tries?” she teased.

“I wanted to make sure I got it right!”

Clarke smiled reassuringly and kissed her gently. “I love your tendency to be over prepared.” She pulled out a single foil package and held it out for Lexa.

Lexa took it, ripped the foil, and pulled out the latex. She rolled it on with ease and gave Clarke a smug look. “It's good to be prepared,” she said. She rolled Clarke over onto her back and hovered over her. “Are you ready?” she whispered.

Clarke lifted her knees to rest on lexa’s hips as her hands rested on her strong shoulders. She looked up at the girl who'd infiltrated her every waking (and many, many sleeping) thought from the day she'd walked into her first period writing class. She never would have guessed that they'd end up here. But she was glad she was. She was thankful for Lexa. More than that, she was in completely and irrevocably in love with her. And there was no one she'd rather experience this moment with than her.

She nodded. “I'm ready.”

Lexa shifted her hips so that the head of her length lined up with Clarke’s entrance. She pressed forward slowly, letting them both get used to the new feeling. She dipped her head down to capture Clarke's lips in a kiss as she continued to push in.

Clarke gasped at the feeling of Lexa sliding into her, inch by slow inch, until she was buried inside her to the hilt. There was a moment of discomfort as her inner walls stretched to accommodate Lexa, but no pain. She broke their kiss and stared up at Lexa. “You're inside me,” she whispered in awe, pressing their foreheads together. “You feel so good.”

Lexa gave a soft grunt as she felt Clarke clench her inner walls around her length. “So do you,” she groaned out. “I need to move.”

“Do it,” Clarke said. She wrapped her legs fully around Lexa's waist and locked her ankles behind her. The position allowed for Lexa to pull nearly all the way out and thrust back on with next to no resistance. She started off with slow, shallow thrusts that rapidly grew to deeper, quicker thrusts until Clarke was writhing beneath her, nails digging half moons into Lexa's shoulders.

Lexa felt herself approaching her orgasm, but she wanted Clarke to come again first. So she shifted her weight onto one hand and reached down with the other so she could circle her fingers around Clarke's clit.

“Ungh, Lexa, fuck,” Clarke gasped out. “I'm gonna come again.” She pressed her own hips forward with each of Lexa's thrusts.

Lexa pressed her face to Clarke’s throat and sucked on the spot that she knew drove Clarke insane. “Let go,” she whispered and pressed her finger more firmly against her clit. “Come for me, Clarke.”

That was it. Hearing her own name on Lexa's lips as she thrust into her and circled her clit sent her over the edge. Again. She cried out and tightened her thighs around Lexa's waist as she swore she saw fucking fireworks. (Later, she realized the fireworks were simply due to how tightly closed her eyes were. Details.) “Lexa,” she gasped out, holding onto the muscular shoulders, actually drawing a bit of blood from her nails.

Lexa gasped at the feeling of Clarke's inner walls spasming around her, squeezing her like a vise, combined with the nails digging into her flesh with a delicious pleasure-pain. That was all it took to make her come, her entire body tensing as she did. Her arms shook, her breathing stalled for several moments, and her lips clamped down on Clarke’s throat as the waves overtook her in the most powerful orgasm of her life thus far. Seconds later, completely spent, she collapsed on top of Clarke as they both struggled to catch their breath.

Clarke gently stroked Lexa’s hair, a comforting gesture for them both, and murmured sweet nothings into her ear.

All too soon, Lexa was forced to move, pulling out of Clarke so she could dispose of the condom. Clarke whimpered at the feeling of emptiness. “Trash can is in the bathroom,” she said, pointing to the door. Lexa kissed her temple before she quickly tied the condom and went to throw it and the wrapper away in the trash can. Clarke used the opportunity to blatantly stare at Lexa’s bare ass.

Clarke grinned as Lexa returned and held out a hand. Lexa took it and laid back down, curling into Clarke. They kissed languidly.

“Are you okay?” Lexa asked after a moment. “I didn't hurt you, did I?”

Clarke shook her head and kissed Lexa's nose in reassurance. “I'm amazing,” she said. “You're amazing.”

Lexa smiled, feeling happier in this moment than she could ever remember being. “I agree. You are amazing, Clarke Griffin.”

“I wish we could stay like this forever,” Clarke whispered. “I want to sleep with you. Like, actually sleep.”

Lexa sighed and put her head on Clarke's shoulder. “I know. I want that, too. Maybe one day…”

Clarke hummed at the thought and felt her eyelids becoming heavy. “Sleep,” she said.

“Clarke we can't fall asleep,” Lexa said, feeling the same pull towards slumber. “Your mom will be home soon.”

Clarke huffed. “Not fair,” she pouted. Then her eyes widened in surprise when her stomach let out a loud groan. “Oh.”

Lexa let out a loud peal of laughter. “We did kind of forget about food,” she said.

Clarke sighed and sat up, knowing that her stomach would not be ignored. “Come on,” she said. “There's leftover spaghetti bolognese in the fridge. If we eat quick enough, we can probably do it again before my mom gets home. And this time, I get to be on top.”

Lexa was sure she'd never moved quicker in her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was the first time I wrote a sex scene where a penis was involved. Hope I didn't disappoint! :) 
> 
>  
> 
> Now for the hard part...
> 
>  
> 
> (Not so) fun fact of the day: I don't think I've said this in author's notes before now, just in response to a few comments. I've been avoiding it because it's NOT a FUN fact. It's a difficult one. But it's important for me to address because of a few comments that challenged how I wrote the scene. 
> 
> The manner in which Lexa was attacked in DC wasn't just something I made up on a whim to accuse all republican politicians of being giant homophobic/transphobic assholes. The way that Lexa was assaulted was based off a real event in my life. I'm not intersex, but I was gay in a small town in the Bible Belt (actually, I wasn’t even sure yet if I was gay… I just knew I liked girls. I didn’t fully work out that I’m a raging lesbian until college...). When I was a sophomore in high school, I developed a crush on a girl who was also a friend (or so I thought). I was not out to anyone. I was still confused and trying to figure my feelings out. The girl I was crushing on found out and told the entire school. 
> 
> I was bullied and harassed for weeks before four kids cornered me in the locker room and assaulted me. One, the city mayor’s son, threatened to rape me to “turn” me straight. They used scissors to cut off ALL of my clothing. Yes, until I was naked. They threw me into a shower stall and turned the water on as hot as it would go. Since it was the city mayor’s son, they got off scot free while I was left with a severe concussion, two cracked ribs, and second degree burns on my shoulders and chest, not to mention PTSD that took years of therapy to move past. (Honestly, I didn't fully move past it until I met my wife.) Yes, the mayor was a staunch republican and also a southern baptist pastor. He controlled the law enforcement officers of the city, and being a nobody from a small town, there was nothing I could do. Nothing my parents could do. So my parents moved us to Atlanta so I could attend a more diverse, accepting school where I found my first girlfriend not long after moving there. 
> 
> Writing about Lexa's experiences is a coping mechanism for me. It's equally difficult and cathartic, especially since Lexa will eventually get justice that I never could. It was not a political statement by any means. I simply wrote (some) of the events that took place (I left out the totally naked and scalding hot water part because that was a part that was too difficult.) I apologize if it came off as biased at all but, well, it is because it's based on a personal experience. I won't apologize for writing what I know. 
> 
>  
> 
> I love you all. 
> 
>  
> 
> ~ LexaRexa


	17. Awkward Conversations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Clexa smut, Clarke has some big news for Raven and Octavia, Anya goes into protective mode, and Abby makes a startling discovery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey hey! I have to say, y'all are quite amazing with your comments, words of continued support, and endless encouragement! I am blessed to have such amazing readers <3

Clarke got her way after they ate the leftover spaghetti. She relished in that fact as she straddled Lexa’s lap and rocked her hips, driving Lexa’s length deeper inside her. She really liked being on top.

Lexa was not complaining about Clarke getting her way. Not one bit. Her back was to the headboard while Clarke rode her and kissed her at the same time. Lexa gripped the blonde’s ass cheeks, encouraging her movements.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of this,” Clarke gasped as Lexa’s hips pressed upwards. Her hands had long since tangled in Lexa’s hair.

“Never,” Lexa whimpered in agreement. The position put her eye level with Clarke’s breasts, which were bouncing up and down in time with Clarke’s movements. God, she loved her breasts. She couldn’t help but lean forward and catch a nipple in her mouth and suck with vigor, knowing that the blonde liked a bit of roughness.

Clarke threw her head back in pure joy at the feeling of Lexa’s heated mouth surrounding her nipple. “Fuck,” she groaned out.

It wasn’t long until they were both gasping out their orgasms, only seconds apart. Clarke collapsed against Lexa’s chest, struggling for air. Lexa’s arms held her close as they sat there for several minutes, basking in the feeling of their naked bodies pressed together, sticky with sweat.

“I’m going to have to take another shower,” Clarke murmured after several minutes.

“Are you complaining?” Lexa asked, teasing.

“Not one bit,” Clarke said. She reached up and kissed Lexa. “I don’t want you to go.” She pouted.

Lexa glanced at the clock and took note of the time. They had about half an hour until Abby was due home, and she wanted to make sure she was gone before then. She sighed. “I don’t want to go, either,” she said. “But I should. We both still have homework, too.”

Clarke groaned. “Fucking unit circle,” she muttered under her breath. Math wasn’t her strong suit, though she typically managed to do fairly well. The only grade she'd received lower than an A (a freaking 89.2%) has been her honors Algebra II class during her sophomore year. But the College Prep math class she was currently enrolled in was kicking her ass and threatening to be the second B. She'd worked out that she needed at least an 87% on her final to barely scrape by with an A.

Lexa laughed and kissed her temple. “Just facetime me if you have any questions about it,” she said. Clarke often did just that while repaying the favor when it came to Clarke’s stronger subjects like English and History.

Clarke still grumbled when Lexa stood to remove the condom and toss it in the trash, then started to get dressed. As she watched from the bed, an idea sprang into Clarke’s head and she stood. “Wait,” she said as Lexa was pulling her boxers up her legs. Lexa paused and gave Clarke a questioning look. Clarke just smiled and reached a hand out to Lexa, guiding her to sit the edge of the bed. She pushed the boxers to the floor. “I never returned the favor,” she said, then she dropped to her knees in front of Lexa.

“Shit, Clarke,” Lexa gasped when Clarke’s tongue met the head of her penis, which was only semi-hard at the moment. But not for long if Clarke kept doing that. “You don’t have to do that.”

“I want to,” Clarke said, using her hand to encourage a full erection. She smiled when Lexa’s shaft immediately responded. She paused and looked up at her girlfriend. “Unless you don’t want me to,” she said. “Do you want my mouth, Lexa?”

Lexa cursed. “Yes.”

Clarke wasted no time, closing her lips around the head of Lexa’s penis and swirling her tongue against the pool of liquid that was already forming at the tip. She had no idea what she was doing, but she used Lexa’s reactions to figure out what she liked and didn’t like. She liked the tongue on the tip thing. She did not like teeth of any sort. (Noted.) She liked when Clarke took as much of her into her mouth as she could without choking. And she really liked when Clarke reached up and cupped her testes in her hand that wasn’t surrounding her at the base, gently at first and then adding pressure until Lexa gasped with pleasure.

“Fuck, Clarke,” she hissed. One hand was holding the back of Clarke’s head, not to push her or hold her in place, but to ground herself in the moment. “I’m really close,” she warned. “Clarke, if you don’t want me to…” She trailed off as Clarke increased her movements and squeezed her hand around the base gently, but firmly. “Clarke,” Lexa gasped, then she was spilling into Clarke’s mouth, spurt after spurt of milky white liquid hitting the back of her throat.

Clarke was prepared for Lexa to come in her mouth, but she wasn’t fully prepared for the amount and some dribbled down her chin and onto her chest as she coaxed the last bits from Lexa. Finally, the girl fell back on the bed, completely spent once again. Clarke gabbed her discarded shirt and wiped away the liquid on her chin and chest, grinning as she did so. Fuck, that was hot. She tossed the shirt aside and climbed up onto her bed, positioning herself next to Lexa.

“God, Clarke,” Lexa panted. “What are you doing to me?”

Clarke just smiled and leaned in to kiss her, pausing to let Lexa pull back if she didn’t want to kiss her just yet. Lexa closed the remaining distance and pressed their lips together, figuring if Clarke had kissed her after she’d gone down on the blonde, then she could return the favor. They stayed like that, kissing languidly, for several minutes. Lexa was just beginning to think that maybe they had time for one more round...

And then it happened.

The sound of the garage door opening caused them to jump apart.

“Fuck,” Clarke said, looking at the clock. “She’s home early. Now she wants to spend more time at home?”

Lexa was already pulling on her boxers and jeans. “Not funny, Clarke,” she said. “I was serious that I didn’t want to be here when she got home. Oh my god, how embarrassing.”

They both finished dressing hastily and Clarke could hear her mom in the kitchen. “It’s okay,” Clarke said. “I’ll go down and greet her, then she’ll take her usual after work shower and you can slip out. Oh god, I need mouthwash first.”

Lexa grimaced. Yeah, good call.

Clarke quickly gargled some mouthwash, then gave Lexa a reassuring look. “I’ll be right back,” she said. Then she hurried down the stairs before her mom could make her way up them.

“Hey, Mom,” she greeted, acting as nonchalant as she could. “You’re home early.” She casually grabbed an apple from the basket on the table and twisted off the stem.

“Finished all my surgeries ahead of schedule,” Abby replied as she sorted through the mail that Clarke had placed on the kitchen island. “How was school today?”

Clarke shrugged. “It was school,” she said. “We’re just reviewing for finals in most of my classes.”

Abby nodded, then looked carefully at Clarke. “Tell Lexa I said hi when you take her home,” she said. “She shouldn’t ride her bike in this weather.” It was raining, which was rare for the desert, but not unheard of.

Fuck. Lexa’s bike was parked outside. Clarke schooled her expression. “I will,” she said. “We have that lit project for Mr. Kane’s class.” She bit into the apple. “It’s due Monday and it’s a killer.” Technically, it wasn't a lie. They did have a lot project due Monday and it was a killer. But she and Lexa had finished it over the past weekend. She never said that's what they’d been working on it...

Abby studied her for a moment, then nodded. Clarke could tell she didn’t quite believe her, but she was relieved when she didn’t ask any other questions. “I’m going to take a shower.” She grabbed her purse and pulled out some bills. “Why don’t you stop at Cafe Rio for dinner? I want my usual.”

Clarke nodded and took the money. “You got it.”

Abby left and Clarke let out a sigh of relief.

“She knows!” Lexa whispered loudly moments after Abby left. She must have been waiting on the stair landing.

“I’m sorry,” Clarke said, looking guilty.

Lexa sighed, then stepped forward to hug her. “It’s not your fault. But can we get out of here before your mom comes back?”

Clarke nodded and pocketed the money as she grabbed her phone and keys. She turned and was about to say something else when she saw Lexa's eyes get wide in shock.

“What?”

“I am so sorry,” Lexa said, looking guilty.

Clarke was confused. “What are you talking about?”

Lexa just grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the mud room where there was a mirror on the wall. Clarke looked at her reflection and gasped.

“Lexa!”

“I'm sorry!”

There, on the left side of her neck was a giant hickey.

No wonder her mom had looked at her funny when she'd said they'd just been working on a project.

 

***

 

“I need to tell you something before we get to Raven’s,” Clarke said as soon as Octavia jumped into the passenger seat of the SUV. Lincoln had an AP test, so he couldn’t take her to school like he had been in the last three weeks. Lexa had messaged her that morning saying that Anya had arrived home for the weekend early and insisted on driving her to school. She’d also said that she was certain it was because she’d told her that they’d had sex and likely wanted to have a long talk with Lexa about it.

“What?” Octavia asked, looking intrigued. “You never keep secrets from Rae.”

Clarke laughed and thought about the mark on her neck that had taken twenty minutes and too many products to count to cover up. That was definitely a secret she'd be keeping from Raven. “Oh, I’m not keeping this a secret from her. I just want to piss her off that I told you first.”

Octavia raised an elegant eyebrow. “Told me what?” she asked suspiciously. She hoped it was what she thought.

Clarke turned out of the subdivision and onto the main road before she answered. “Lexa and I did it yesterday,” she said, eyes on the road.

“It?” Octavia repeated, voice louder than usual. “Clarke Griffin are you telling me that you are no longer the innocent one of the group?” She sounded excited.

Clarke scoffed. “Was I ever actually innocent, O?”

Octavia ignored her and surged across the center console to ambush Clarke in a fierce hug.

“Octavia!” Clarke gasped. “I’m driving!” She barely managed to not swerve into the other lane of traffic.

“Right,” Octavia said, quickly pulling back. “I’m just so happy for you! Oh my god, Clarke, do you realize what this means?”

Clarke cast her a sideways glance. “That I’m sexually active just like many, many other teenagers?”

“No, that you’re officially all grown up,” Octavia said.

Clarke snorted. “Raven said the same thing,” she said. “And you’re both technically wrong. We’re all still minors.”

“Details,” Octavia said, waving a dismissive hand. Then she squealed again. “You have to tell me everything. How was it? Was it sudden or did you plan it? Did it hurt? My first time with Lincoln really hurt. Oh, and were you safe? Tell me you were safe. Wait, is that something you need to even worry about?”

“Octavia,” Clarke interrupted. “I can only answer one question at a time.” She was pulling into Raven’s complex. “And wait until Raven joins us.”

“Okay, but can I please be the one to tell her?” Octavia asked.

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Sure,” she said.

Raven clamored into the backseat and was about to open her mouth to ask when Octavia jumped in.

“I have an announcement!” she cried out, turning her body to face Raven. “Our little Clarke here is now a woman.”

Clarke rolled her eyes again and waited.

“You told her before me?!” Raven cried out. “Wait, we’ll talk about that later. Tell us about it!”

Clarke sighed and shook her head. “You guys are so nosey,” she said.

“Duh,” Octavia said. “We’re your best friends.”

“Yeah, we tell each other everything. Was it good?”

Clarke couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across her face.

“It was!” Raven squealed. “I had no doubt Lexa would be a rockstar in the sack.”

“Raven,” Octavia scolded. “Be nice. We also knew Clarke would be a rockstar.”

Raven shrugged. “I suppose.”

“Hey!” Clarke said with a laugh. “I’ll have you know that I was amazing.”

“I’m sure you were, Princess,” Raven said. “As long as you weren’t a pillow princess.”

“Fuck you,” Clarke bit out, but she was laughing.

“I don’t think Lexa would appreciate that,” Raven said.

“You didn’t answer my earlier question,” Octavia said. “Were you safe? And do you even need to use protection?”

Clarke nodded. “Yes, and yes,” she said.

“Good, now get to the good stuff,” Raven said. “How many times did you do it?”

Clarke sighed. She knew she was going to have to give them something. But at the same time, she wanted to be respectful of Lexa. “Look, I’ll tell you guy this and only this. Yes, it was amazing. No, it didn’t hurt. We did it twice, and yes, we were safe both times. Now that’s all you two are getting from me.”

They both protested, but Clarke held firm. She ignored their pleas. It wasn't that she was shy or embarrassed, quite the opposite in fact. It was simply because what she'd shared with Lexa seemed too private and intimate to go into detail. Her friends would just have to accept that.

 

  
***

  
“So, you and blondie now have carnal knowledge of one another,” Anya said, hands on the wheel as she stared ahead at the red light.

Lexa sighed. She knew that’s why Anya had wanted to drive her to school. And she knew that’s why she’d taken the long way around. Her older sister was done with her spring semester and had shown up the previous night with bags. Her apartment was finally being fixed after she’d threatened her roommate with a civil suit. It was now the landlord’s issue to take up with Ontari, who was now looking for a new place. Anya already had a new roommate lined up to take over when Ontari left at the end of the month.

When Clarke had dropped Lexa off the previous night, Anya had just been pulling into the driveway and waited for Lexa before going inside, and it didn’t take long for Lexa to admit that her disheveled appearance was due to more than simple making out.

“I’m older than you were when you lost your virginity,” Lexa pointed out. Anya had been sixteen.

Anya huffed. “This isn’t about me,” she said.

“No, it’s about me and my relationship with Clarke, who is the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

Anya looked over at her sister and noticed the permanent smile on her face. She had to admit, she hadn’t seen her sister look that happy in, well, she’s not sure she’s ever seen her look that happy. She sighed. “Yeah, okay, fine. Clarke’s amazing, blah, blah, blah. But you have to worry about things that I didn’t have to worry about. Like babies.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “Got it covered, Mom.”

Anya smirked. “Pun intended?”

Lexa made a face. “Gross, Ahn. But yes.”

“Do you need more condoms? Because I can get like a shit ton from the campus health clinic for free. They have summer hours, so I can just go and grab a bunch.”

Lexa was about to argue, but thought better of it. It had been awkward enough getting that first box. The pimply teenage boy had smirked at the checkout of the CVS and looked at her in a way that made her feel all kinds of creeped out. She supposed she’d have to get used to it eventually, but for now she was willing to let Anya help her avoid it.

“Ugh, fine,” Lexa groaned out.

Anya raised her eyebrows and gave her an incredulous look.

“Okay, yes, please,” Lexa said. “I would be ever so grateful if you got me some condoms.”

Anya sighed and threaded her fingers through her hair. “That’s not something I ever thought I’d hear my sister say to me,” she muttered.

“This isn’t exactly a conversation I ever wanted to have with you, either,” Lexa insisted.

“Look, you know you can talk to me about anything, even if it’s embarrassing,” Anya said.

“I know,” Lexa replied. “And you know the same is true for you. You can talk to me about anything, even if it’s uncomfortable about me because you’re regularly hooking up with one of my friends.”

Anya looked weary. “You know about that, huh?”

“Did you really think Raven wouldn’t share?”

Anya shook her head. “Not for a minute,” she said, then she shrugged. “It’s just sex. Nothing much to discuss.”

“Uh huh.”

“It is.”

“Okay.”

“I’m serious.”

“Are you trying to convince me or yourself?”

Lexa received only silence to that question. She didn’t say anything more.

 

***

 

Abigail Griffin made a lot of discoveries in one afternoon.

It was Thursday evening and she was doing her weekly round of collecting trash from around the house, including all of the bathrooms, as she had since moving into that house. The trash pickup was scheduled for the following day and she wanted to get the bin down by the curb before going to bed so she didn’t have to do it in the morning. She wasn’t trying to snoop on her daughter, really, but when she went to empty the small trash can in Clarke’s bathroom, she made a startling discovery that made her gasp and freeze in place.

There, on top of layers of discarded makeup remover towelettes, used Q-tips, and tampon applicators wrapped in the packaging they came in was a square foil packet and what appeared to be, oh god, a used condom. Wait, make that two foil packets. She didn’t make an effort to see if there was a second condom also present.

Abby stared, mind reeling. She felt nausea swirl in her gut at the implications of what she was seeing.

She grabbed the entire waste bin and took it downstairs. Clarke was supposed to be home from Octavia’s within the hour, and she was going to demand answers.

She paced as she waited for Clarke, the trash can on the coffee table of the living room as she nearly wore a hole in the area rug beneath her feet. She didn't want to believe the worst about her daughter, but the evidence was right there in front of her.

The sound of the garage door opening had Abby on high alert and she poised herself for confrontation. The door leading from the garage to the kitchen opened, the beep beep beep of the alarm sounding in the distance.

“Clarke, I need to speak to you in the living room,” Abby called out. She grabbed the bin and set it to the side, figuring it best to bring out later on.

“What’s up, Mom?” Clarke asked as she entered the room, a bottle of water in her hand. She set her school bag on the chair and stood there, giving her mom a curious look. She looked… upset. “Is everything okay?”

Abby sighed and gestured to the couch. “Sit. We need to have a little talk.”

Okay, now Clarke was worried. She did as her mother asked, bracing herself for what Abby was going to say. She thought she had an idea where this was going. It had to be about yesterday and the hickey on her neck. She braced herself and waited for her mom to speak, waited for another sex talk and more rules.

Abby sat on the coffee table in front of Clarke so she could face her daughter head on for this conversation. She took a deep breath and looked her daughter right in the eye. “Clarke, honey, I’m going to ask you something and I need you to be completely honest with me. Okay?”

Clarke nodded slowly. “Okay,” she said, anxious and fearing the worst. She took a drink of water in attempt to calm her nerves. She braced herself and waited for her mom to speak.

“Are you cheating on Lexa?”

Clarke nearly spat out the water she hadn’t yet swallowed. It burned her nostrils as she sputtered. That had not been what she'd expected. “What?! No! Why would you even think that?” She coughed again.

Abby sighed. She’d hoped Clarke would just be honest. “I was doing my weekly trash collection and, well…” She grabbed the trashcan and placed it next to their feet, pointing down.

Clarke glanced down and felt herself get lightheaded. Oh, shit! The condoms. How could she have been so stupid? Fuck. She quickly looked up at her mom, panicking. “It’s not what you think,” she said, wondering how she was going to explain this one. Of course, her mom still didn’t know about Lexa being intersex and of course she’d assume the condom meant that she had had sex with a guy. A guy who obviously wasn’t the person she was dating.

“What other explanation is there, Clarke?” Abby asked, getting annoyed. “I raised you better than this. You’re not a cheater. What on earth were you thinking?”

“I’m not!” Clarke said in agreement. “I swear. I just… I...” She let out a frustrated growl. “Wait here a minute,” she said, pulling her phone out of her bag as she stood up.

“Clarke--”

“Please,” Clarke said, voice imploring. “I just need to make a phone call. I promise to explain afterwards. And I swear it’s not what you think. Just… wait.”

She left the room before Abby could protest. She opened up her contacts and hit the call button next to Lexa’s name, hoping the girl would pick up. She did.

“Hey,” Lexa answered, her voice an immediate source of calming Clarke’s nerves.

“Hey,” Clarke responded. “I’m, uh, kind of having a bit of a crisis here and I don’t know what to do.”

“What is it?” Lexa asked, immediately concerned.

“My mom found the condoms that we used yesterday as she was collecting trash for tomorrow’s pickup,” Clarke quickly explained, no time for beating around the bush. “And now she thinks I’m cheating whore.”

“Oh my god,” Lexa’s said. “Fuck.”

“Yeah,” Clarke said. “So, not only am I embarrassed that my mother found our used condoms, she also thinks the worst of me.” She was back to panicking.

“Clarke, calm down,” Lexa said. “Just… tell her the truth.”

“What?” Clarke asked, shocked. She’d been trying to figure out a way around doing just that. She’d even thought of telling her mom that she’d let Octavia and Lincoln use her room. She hadn’t considered telling her what was really going on.

“Just tell her,” Lexa repeated. “It’s okay.”

“Are you sure? Because I can figure something else out. You were so worried about her knowing yesterday...”

“I know,” Lexa said. “But it’s more important that she know the truth than think that about you. I trust your mom, and she’s a doctor. She must know about this stuff.”

“Okay, okay,” Clarke said. “You’re amazing, you know that?”

“I know,” Lexa said, then ended the call.

Clarke took a deep breath before sliding her phone back into her pocket and making her way back out to the living room. “Okay, I’m sorry about that,” she said. Her mother was still sitting on the coffee table, arms crossed and looking all kinds of pissed.

“This better be good, Clarke,” Abby said, impatient.

Clarke sat back on the couch. “It is,” she said. “I promise.” She tucked a bit of hair behind her ear and licked her lips, both nervous habits. “I’m not cheating on Lexa,” she started. “She’s intersex.”

Abby blinked, not expecting that answer. Of course she was familiar with the term and understood the implications. “Intersex,” she repeated.

Clarke nodded. “I had to call her to make sure she was okay with me telling you,” she explained. “She was born with female DNA, but male reproductive organs. Her parents opted not to have reconstructive surgery when she was two because it was too risky.”

Abby pinched the bridge of her nose. “So the condoms…”

“Were ours,” Clarke finished, cheeks burning and looking at anything except her mother. This was not a conversation she wanted to have.

Abby nodded, unsure of what to do with this new information. She sighed. “How long?”

“What?” Clarke asked.

“How long have you two been having sex?” She didn’t ask in a judgemental way, but rather in a concerned parent one.

“Oh, um, yesterday was, ah, the first time.”

Abby nodded slowly. “And she was your first partner?”

Clarke nodded.

“Are you okay?” Abby asked. “Any discomfort or issues today?”

“No,” Clarke said. “I’m good.”

Abby took a deep breath. “Okay. Well, I’m glad to see that you two were safe.”

Clarke nodded. “Yeah, she, ah, she’s not very fertile, but it’s not impossible, so we figured better safe than sorry.”

“Good,” Abby said, cracking a smile. “I’m too young to be a grandmother.”

Clarke smiled. “I’m sorry you found out like this,” she said. “Both about Lexa and that we’re, you know, having sex.”

Abby reached out and grabbed her daughter’s hand reassuringly. “I remember what it’s like to be a teenager. I won’t say that I condone you being sexually active, but I know you’re both smart young women. I trust you to know what you’re ready for, and I trust that you know that just because you’ve done it once doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it. But if you do, I trust you will always be safe.”

Clarke nodded. “We will,” she said.

“And I want you to start birth control,” Abby said. “Just to be extra safe.”

Clarke nodded, having already considered that option. “Okay.”

“I’ll call tomorrow to make an appointment with Dr. Feldner,” Abby said, mentioning her own gynecologist. “She’ll check everything out just to make sure things are okay.”

“Mom, I’m fine, I promise,” Clarke insisted.

“She’ll want to give you a pelvic exam before writing a prescription anyway,” Abby said, knowing her own doctor’s procedures. “And it’s good to have one once you’re sexually active. Just to be sure.”

Clarke sighed, not looking forward to the intrusion on her body, but knowing her mom was right. “Okay.”

“And if you need more condoms, just let me know.”

“Mom,” Clarke groaned out.

“Clarke, I’m serious. I know this is an uncomfortable conversation, but it needs to happen.”

Clarke stared at the ceiling fan as it whirred above them. “I know, it’s just embarrassing.”

“Yes, well, maybe you should empty your own bathroom trash from now on?” Abby said.

“Yep,” Clarke agreed. “That’s definitely going to start happening.” She finally looked at her mom. “I love her,” she whispered. She hadn’t even told Lexa that yet.

Abby softened dramatically at that. “I can see that,” she said, cupping her daughter’s cheek. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I don’t want that, either.”

“I also never, ever want to walk in on the two of you, so if you decide you’re still ready for this, you lock your door. Even if I’m not home. Understood?”

Clarke nodded, eyes wide. She wanted to tell her mom that they’d never do it while she was home anyway, but decided against it. “Yes, ma’am.”

“And from now on, I’ll text or call if I’m going to be home earlier than planned. And please, for the love of god, do not let me get a call from the police that they caught you two in the back of a car somewhere.”

Clarke could only nod, eyes wide.

“And if you need to talk about anything, you come to me. No judgement. Okay?”

“Okay.” Clarke hugged her mother. “I promise,” she said. When they separated, Clarke looked her mother in the eye. “Uh, Mom, can you just act normal around Lexa when you see her?”

Abby laughed. “You think I’m going to start treating her differently for sleeping with my daughter?”

“Ew, Mom, no, I meant because of her being intersex,” Clarke said. “It’s a sensitive topic and I don’t want her to be uncomfortable.”

Abby softened. “Of course I won’t treat her any differently because of that,” she said. “But no promises about the other.”

Clarke groaned. “Moooom.”

Abby just laughed and headed to the kitchen to start dinner.

Oh, boy.

Clarke fell back on the couch and went over what had just happened in her head. Not only did her mother know about Lexa, she knew they were having sex. Excellent. She sighed and made her way upstairs, pulling out her phone as soon as she closed the door behind her. She dialed Lexa as she flopped onto her bed, knowing she was waiting for her call.

“Well?” Lexa answered on the first ring.

“You were right,” Clarke said. “She barely blinked an eye at you being intersex. She was a little concerned about the sex thing, though.”

“Ugh,” Lexa groaned. “I won’t be able to face your mother ever again. Is she mad?”

“No,” Clarke responded. “She said she doesn’t condone it, but she knows she can’t stop us, so she wants me to start birth control.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Lexa said.

“Agreed.”

“She’s really not mad? I don’t need to watch my back?” Lexa was only half-joking.

Clarke laughed. “No,” she said. “I mean, I don’t think she’s thrilled, but she didn’t forbid us from doing it or anything. She even said the new rule is locked doors if we’re doing it.”

“Wait, seriously? No more ‘open door’ policy?”

“Nope. Guess she realized that we’re gonna do it anyway. Might as well be in a safe place instead of the back of a car or something.”

Lexa let out a laugh. “I’m not sure my parents would be as understanding.” She paused, then turned serious. “You don’t think she’ll tell my mom, do you? I mean, they work together and all that.”

Clarke thought. “I don’t know,” she said. “I didn’t think of that. I’ll ask her not to if you want. I know they’ve been talking a lot more at the hospital since we’ve started dating.”

Lexa sighed. “I think I should just tell her,” she said. “I mean, it’s only fair. You had to tell your mom.”

“My mom found our condoms,” Clarke pointed out. “I don’t think there was any way around that.”

“Still,” Lexa said. “I don’t want to put your mom in an awkward spot with my mom.”

Clarke smiled. “You’re really amazing, you know that?”

“Clarke,” Lexa protested.

“I’m serious,” Clarke said. “I love y--how much you think about other people.” She widened her eyes at how she’d nearly let it slip that she loved her. While she was sure of her own feelings, she wasn’t about to tell her over the phone. “It’s one of my favorite things about you.”

“Oh yeah? You know what my favorite thing is about you?”

“My winning personality? My incredible intelligence? Oh! My superior abilities in bed?”

“Well, it’s not your humble nature, that’s for sure,” Lexa said dryly.

“You wound me,” Clarke said. “Are you saying any of those that I listed aren’t true?”

Lexa barked out a laugh. “Definitely not,” she said. “Especially that last one.”

Clarke grinned despite herself and despite the fact that Lexa couldn’t see her.

“But that’s not what I was going to say,” Lexa continued. “I was going to say that my favorite thing about you is how amazing you’ve been about everything, how supportive you’ve been. You could have just run away when I told you about me and D.C., but you didn’t.”

“Of course I didn’t,” Clarke said, all notes of her earlier teasing gone. In place was a more serious tone. “You’re special.”

“So are you,” Lexa replied.

“Goodnight, Lex,” Clarke said softly.

“Goodnight, Clarke.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That Clarke/Abby scene was one of my favorite scenes to write and I'm not sure why. XD
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: This one is actually fun, I promise. :) We are moving to another state at the end of July and officially sold our house two days ago! Now we need to find a house to move into...


	18. Mothers Know Best

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa talks to her mom, Ranya have a moment, Abby and Iris have a chat, and some more Clexa smut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to hell for the end of this chapter. Yep. 
> 
> Also, there's a short Ranya scene in the middle (just after Lexa talks to her mom) that has zero affect on plot development but it was a cute scene that wouldn't leave my head so I had to include it.

Lexa had put off the inevitability awkward conversation for as long as she could. Her mother had had three days off in a row, but she was due back at work early the following morning, where she would be working alongside Abby. It was time.

“Mom, can I talk to you about something?” Lexa asked nervously as she approached her mother, who was folding laundry in the master bedroom. They were the only ones home, her father having taken Aden out of town on a baseball trip and Anya was busy doing god knows what with Raven.

Iris paused in folding a pair of jeans, taking note of the serious tone of her daughter’s voice. “Of course,” she said, putting the half-folded jeans down. “Do I need to sit down for this?” she teased, hoping to break some of the tension.

Lexa sighed. “Probably,” she said.

“Oh,” Iris replied, her smile fading. “Okay. Let’s go to the kitchen.”

Lexa nodded and they made their way to the kitchen table. It’s where all serious conversations took place.

Iris’ head was full of possibilities as they walked towards the kitchen, settling on one in particular that made her especially nervous. Not one to beat around the bush, she gripped Lexa’s hand as soon as they sat and gave her a pointed look. “Is Clarke pregnant?”

Honestly, Lexa wasn't at all shocked by that question. She calmly shook her head. “No, Mom,” she said. “I am not making you a young grandmother.”

“Oh, thank god,” Iris said, hand on her chest. “Don't get me wrong. I like Clarke. You're both just so young.”

Lexa nodded. “We know,” she said. She saw an opportunity. “Which is why we're being safe.”

“That's good to--” Iris stopped mid-sentence, realizing the implication of her daughter’s words. “Why you are being safe? Not why you will be safe?”

Lexa nodded slowly, then the words just flowed from her in a cluster of run-on sentences. “I figured you should know because Abby knows, and I didn’t want to put her in an awkward position since you two work together, and it’s not something I want her to have to deal with because I like her and I like Clarke. I mean, I really like Clarke. I love her, actually, and we were safe and responsible and we were both ready and we talked about it a lot. Before. And after. But then Abby found out because she was cleaning out Clarke’s trash and, well, she knows we were safe because, um, she saw the condoms. That actually led to a pretty funny story about how at first Abby thought Clarke was cheating on me, because she still didn’t know that I’m intrsex, so Clarke was basically having a panic attack because she didn’t know what to do, so I told her to just tell her mother, so now Abby knows that I have a penis and she also knows that we’re having sex and now you know that too. So… Yeah.” She finally took a breath.

Iris sat there for several moments, eyes wide and blinking more than usual, mouth agape, and mind reeling at all the information that was just presented to her by her obviously very anxious daughter. Lexa wasn’t one for many words, but she tended to go on rants or babbling sprees like the one she’d just witnessed when she was stressed.

“Please say something,” Lexa finally broke the silence and Iris realized that she’d yet to speak.

“What am I supposed to say?” she asked, genuinely not sure how to react.

Lexa licked her suddenly dry lips. “I don’t know,” she replied. “Ground me. Tell me what a disappointment I am.” She shrugged and cast her eyes to her lap where she picked at the skin on the side of her thumb nail. It was already beginning to bleed, but she couldn’t stop the nervous habit.

“Oh, sweetie,” Iris said, realizing how her silence must have come across. “Look at me.” She waited for her daughter to do just that. She reached out and pressed her hand to the side of Lexa’s face. “You are not a disappointment. Okay? I don’t quite know how I feel about you and Clarke having sex, but you’re still my daughter and I love you. I am very proud to be your mom.”

Lexa lost the battle with the tears and one fell down her cheek, rolling until it met her mother’s hand. Iris wiped it away with her thumb. “I’m sorry, Mom.”

“Shhh, don’t apologize,” Iris said. “You’re a teenager. These things are a part of growing up. But I think I need to talk to Abby before I come to any conclusions or make any decisions.”

“What about Dad?” Lexa asked, feeling nauseated at the thought of having to tell him. He was an amazing father, don’t get her wrong, but he was incredibly protective of Lexa, especially since the incident in D.C. She wasn’t sure what to expect if he found out that she was having sex.

Iris sighed. “I don’t think this is something that he needs to know. I don’t like keeping secrets from your father, but I think in this case, it’s for the best.”

Lexa nodded, relieved. She was still anxious, and she would be until her mother had that talk with Clarke’s mother, but she felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders by telling her mother. “When do you think you’ll talk to Abby?” Lexa asked, hoping it was sooner rather than later. “Tomorrow?”

“If we find a chance to talk during our shifts, then yes. It depends how busy it is.”

Lexa nodded, knowing that her mom’s shifts could get ridiculously hectic. “I do love her, you know.”

Iris sighed. “I figured as much,” she said. “I like Clarke. She’s good for you. But I need time to process this, okay?” At Lexa sad nod, she stood and hugged her. “I’m not mad, okay? And you’re not in trouble. Thank you for telling me.”

Lexa hugged her mom back and hoped everything would work out in the end.

 

***

 

“Fuck, Raven, are you trying to kill me?”

Raven gave Anya a smug grin as she stood up from her position kneeling on the floor of her bedroom, head between the older girl’s thighs. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand as she looked down at her… whatever Anya was as she laid back on the bed, still in her bra. And nothing else.

Raven didn't answer, just pulled off the rest of her clothes (which by then only consisted of her jeans and underwear) and straddled Anya’s slim hips, her center pressing against her lower abdomen.

Anya gasped and opened her eyes, immediately sitting up to kiss her… whatever Raven was.

Soon, Raven was panting and crying out at the mercy of Anya's magical fingers, then collapsing on the mattress, breathing erratic.

“Payback’s a bitch,” Anya said, laying next to her.

“I fucking love payback,” Raven murmured as she focused on getting her breathing back to normal. “I love fucking.”

“Charming,” Anya said.

Raven looked over at Anya and turned on her side to face her. “Well, to be honest, I just love fucking you. I don't have anything to compare it to, but wow.”

Anya rolled her eyes. “Wow? Really? You need better pickup lines.”

“Is it technically a pickup line if I already fucked the girl?”

“Touché,” Anya admitted. “I'm not spending the night here again.”

“Uh huh,” Raven said, a smile playing on her lips.

“Seriously,” Anya insisted. “Last time was a fluke. I was exhausted from working on my paper.”

“‘Kay.”

There was several moments of silence. Then Raven reached behind her and turned off the light on her nightstand. It was only a quarter past ten, but she was exhausted. If Anya wanted to leave, she'd have to take it upon herself to do so.

Several more minutes passed and Raven felt herself drifting off. Then Anya broke the silence.

“Raven?” Her voice was softer than Raven had ever heard it.

“Yeah?”

“I like you.”

Raven smiled into the darkness. “I like you, too.”

Anya woke her up the next morning. With her tongue.

 

  
***

  
Abby was reviewing a patient’s post-op chart, glad to see that the young heart transplant recipient seemed to be bouncing back quite well. She checked her watch and noted the time. With her next surgery not scheduled for another two hours, now would be the perfect time to grab lunch and get some research done. She grumbled to herself when she entered the hospital cafeteria, mentally kicking herself for forgetting her lunch in the refrigerator at home. In there was some leftover chicken marsala from last night’s dinner.

Now, she’d have to settle for a lackluster salad and soggy sandwich. Oh, joy.

“Doctor Griffin,” a voice broke her concentration as she deliberated which sandwich to go for--tuna, turkey club, or BLT? She looked up to see Iris Woods standing behind her in the line. She smiled in greeting.

“Hello, Nurse Iris,” she said. She knew the woman wanted to sit down and have a conversation about their daughters. At least, that’s what she assumed when Clarke had mentioned that Lexa’s mom wanted to talk to her. “I hear you wanted to talk. I assume it’s about our daughters?” She decided on the turkey club and moved down the line.

Iris nodded and grabbed her own sandwich. “Yes. Do you have a few spare moments during your lunch?”

“Sure,” Abby said. “I was going to take this back to my office. We can speak privately there.”

After paying for their meals, they made their way to Abby’s fifth floor office--new to her since she’d stepped down as the Head of Cardio. A new Head had taken residence in her old office the week prior. That was one downside of stepping down. Her old office had been huge, complete with large floor to ceiling windows that overlooked the mountains. And it had a private shower and a couch big enough and comfortable enough to grab a nap. Not this office. It was spacious enough with lots of natural lighting from the windows, but the couch was small and there was no private bathroom.

Still, it was worth it to be at home more.

At least it still had a small table with four chairs surrounding it, perfect for occasions such as this.

“So, I take it you know?” Abby asked once she’d closed the door behind them and they’d sat at the table.

Iris nodded. “If you mean that our children are having sex, then yes. Lexa told me last night. She said she didn’t want things to be awkward for you since we work together.”

“Well, that’s sweet of her,” Abby replied.

“I think she was also worried you’d tell me,” Iris said with a smile.

Abby laughed. “Now, that sounds like a teenager’s reasoning,” she replied. Then she sighed and her expression turned serious. “How do you feel about it?”

Iris thought for a momen. “To be honest, I’m not thrilled. Don’t get me wrong, Clarke is a wonderful girl and I love that she’s helped to bring back the old Lexa. I just worry. Do you know about what happened to her in D.C.?”

Abby shook her head. “I don’t,” she said.

Iris looked troubled. “I’ll give you the CliffNotes version, then,” she said. “Basically, she was attacked in the locker room of her old school for being a girl with a penis, and the kids who did it were never prosecuted because their families were prominent politicians. It really messed her up. She was in the hospital for a week, then refused to leave the house for another three. When word came that no charges were going to be pressed, she went into a tailspin. That’s when we decided to move once the semester ended, which she finished online.”

Abby felt a pang in her gut at the thought of something like that happening to Clarke. She couldn’t even imagine the turmoil. “Oh my god,” was all she could say.

Iris nodded. “When Lexa started school here, she was terrified. But she met Clarke and her friends that first day and she’s been more and more like her old self ever since.”

“But you worry about her,” Abby said, understanding completely.

Iris nodded. “I know Clarke is a good kid. They both are. I just can’t see my baby hurt like that again.”

“Clarke would never--”

“I know,” Iris interrupted. “I didn’t mean to imply that she would hurt Lexa. I just meant in general. Everything has just made me incredibly overprotective, so hearing that my baby girl is having sex, well, I want to jump into Mama Bear mode.”

Abby gave her a soft smile. “I get that. But I also know they’re going to do what they want. We can’t stop that. They’re growing up.”

“I know,” Iris said. “I just wish I could keep her safe and protected forever.”

“Trust me, I know that feeling,” Abby replied. “If you don’t mind my asking, how old were you when you first started having sex?”

Iris laughed. “This is probably why I’m so resistant to this,” she said. “I was twenty-one. Junior in college. I never felt the desire to sleep with anyone until then. I didn’t even have my first boyfriend until I was nineteen.”

Abby nodded. “It makes sense, then,” she said. “Lexa just found her someone earlier than you did.”

Iris sighed. “And you?”

Abby chuckled. “I met my late husband, Jake, when I was twelve,” she explained. “I never dated anyone else. We first slept together sophomore year, just after I turned sixteen. Clarke was born when I was twenty-three and still in med school.”

“I’m sorry,” Iris said. “About your husband.”

Abby gave a sad nod. “I completely understand the feelings Clarke and Lexa are experiencing because I've been there. I’ve watched them together, and I see the similarities to my own relationship with Jake. You said that Clarke is good for Lexa, but Lexa is also good for Clarke. She grounds her in a way that I've not ever been able to. I guess all of this is why I’m not as freaked out? I mean, I’m putting Clarke on birth control next week, but other than that?” She shrugged. “I trust my daughter. She’s smart enough to know what she can handle. And I feel like Lexa is probably the same way. Though, you obviously know her better than I do.”

Iris gave a nod. “I trust her, too. It’s still hard, though. I don’t think of her as an almost adult, you know? She’s still my little girl.”

“I think they always will be,” Abby replied.

Iris smiled. “So, what should we do about our girls?”

Abby decided to be completely honest. “I told Clarke that just because they did it once didn’t mean they had to keep doing it, but let’s be honest. They’re going to.”

Iris nodded silently.

“So, I told her that I want them to be safe, and I didn’t just mean birth control. I meant that I didn’t want them to get caught in the back of a car somewhere.”

“So how do we stop that?” Iris asked. “I mean, we can’t just let them do it under our roofs. Can we?”

Abby shrugged. “I’d rather that than a dark alley or a sketchy backroad.”

Iris sighed deeply. “I suppose you’re right. But I also have Lexa’s father and Aden to think about.”

“Well, it’s just me and Clarke at our house,” Abby said. “I’ll be honest, I basically told Clarke that if they do it again, they lock her door so I don’t walk in on anything. I know that pretty much gave them the green light, but--”

“It’s better than a dark alley,” Iris said. “I don’t like it, but you’re right.”

“We have to let them grow up,” Abby said.

“Why?” Iris asked, groaning in jest.

Abby laughed. “Circle of life, dear friend.”

“I feel really old right now,” Iris said.

 

***

 

“So, your mom pretty much gave you permission, but we can only do it here?”

Lexa nodded. “She said it’s just safer because, well, my dad and Aden. Since it’s just you and your mom here…”

Clarke tossed her head back and let out a laugh. “I have to say, I never thought I’d have permission to have sex while still in high school. Is this for real?”

Lexa chuckled. “I don’t think it’s permission, per say. My mom isn’t happy about it, but she knows she can’t stop us. And she said she trusts me, so she didn’t really have much choice.”

Clarke kissed her then, holding her close with a hand on the back of her neck. They were in Clarke’s room, door closed (and locked!), and sitting on her bed, facing one another.

“Was your mom extra freaked out about you possibly getting pregnant?” Lexa asked when they parted.

Clarke nodded. “She made an appointment for me next week to get birth control pills. Then she came home yesterday with these.” She opened her nightstand drawer to reveal the condoms her mother had given her.

Lexa laughed. “Oh my god. This is so embarrassing. I still won’t be able to look your mom in the eye for months.” She buried her face in Clarke’s shoulder.

Clarke’s arms immediately wrapped around her and she kissed her temple. “I take it your mom was freaked about it, too?”

Lexa nodded into her shoulder. “You could say that,” she muttered. Then she sighed and pulled back. “When is your mom supposed to be home?” she asked, a grin on her face.

Clarke returned her grin. “Not until late. She’s out with her best friend, probably getting drunk.”

“Excellent,” Lexa said, then she kissed Clarke again.

“Hmm, why?” Clarke asked, playing innocent. “What do you have planned?”

Lexa raised an eyebrow. “Oh, nothing,” she said casually. Then she leaned back and took off her shirt. “Just, you know, finishing up some homework.” Next went her bra. “Maybe watch some Netflix.” She smiled suggestively at Clarke. “Or, maybe get naked with my girlfriend.”

“I vote for that,” Clarke said, pulling off her own shirt and tossing it aside.

“I was hoping you’d say that,” Lexa said, immediately pushing Clarke against the mattress and pinning her hands above her. “Because part of that plan includes worshiping her entire body.” She kissed her quickly. “Head.” Kiss. “To.” Kiss. “Toe.” Kiss. This one was deep, tongues coming out to play and hips beginning to buck.

Clarke let out a soft moan as Lexa’s one hand began to explore. Her other hand held Clarke’s wrists firmly above her head. Clarke felt herself get ridiculously wet from this new side of Lexa. She’d never thought she’d like being dominated in bed, but being dominated by Lexa? Sign her the fuck up.

“Don’t move your hands,” Lexa said into her ear, voice steady and deep. “Don’t move at all. Got it?”

Clarke gave an obedient not. Lexa let go of her wrists and undid the front clasp of Clarke’s dark blue bra, pushing the cups to the side and immediately taking one of the already pebbled nipples into her mouth. Clarke gasped, her hips arching upwards in search of some relief.

“Ah, ah, Clarke,” Lexa said, lifting her head from Clarke’s breast. “Don’t move, or I’ll have to punish you.”

Jesus fucking christ, Clarke thought to herself, eyes squeezing closed as she concentrated on following Lexa’s commands. Her underwear was completely done for.

“Good,” Lexa said. Then she blew cold air across Clarke’s wet nipple, chuckling at the whimper Clarke let out. She teased hot, wet kisses down Clarke’s torso, using her tongue as she went to tease her thoroughly.

“Lexa, please,” Clarke groaned. It was taking absolutely everything in her power not to move, especially when Lexa moved between her legs and pressed her hard length to her center. “I’m so turned on.”

“Oh yeah?” Lexa asked against her navel. “Are you wet for me?”

“Soaked,” Clarke said. Then an evil grin formed on her face. “And I shaved this afternoon, so it’s even more slick than usual.”

Lexa gasped against Clarke’s abdomen. “Fuck, Clarke,” she said, making Clarke grin in victory. “You don’t ever play by the rules, do you?”

Clarke chuckled. “Not when I’m being tortured, no,” she said. “Seriously, Lex. If you don’t touch me soon, I think I’m gonna explode.”

Lexa growled into Clarke’s abdomen and made quick work of the fastenings of her jeans. She didn’t even pull them off before slipping her hand into her underwear and--fucking hell. Slick. Clarke hadn’t been lying.

“Fuck,” Lexa groaned out as her fingers traced along smooth, puffy lips. She needed to see what she was touching. She pulled her hand out and tugged Clarke’s jeans and underwear down and off before pushing Clarke’s thighs apart and staring down at the delicacy before her. Clarke was wet and glistening for her, the evidence of her arousal literally dripping down to the duvet beneath her hips. She could see the darker stain forming on the lilac-colored fabric. Fuck.

“Are you just gonna stare or am I going to have to do something about this myself?” Clarke asked, impatient. She reached one hand down to trace over her outer lips.

Lexa was suddenly reminded of her mission. (Though, she was definitely going to have to see that someday…) She grabbed Clarke’s wrist and pulled it away. “I said don’t move,” she reminded. “Next time, I’ll have to punish you.”

Clarke whimpered and felt herself get even wetter, if that was even possible. She returned her hand above her head.

Lexa didn’t waste anymore time. She got up and stripped off all her clothes, meeting Clarke’s eye the entire time. When she was naked, she rejoined Clarke on the bed, positioning herself over the blonde so she could kiss her again.

Clarke hummed into the kiss. She really wanted to grab Lexa and pull her close and beg her to fuck her until she couldn’t take any more, but she refrained. Barely.

Until she felt Lexa’s groin press against her own.

They both gasped as the underside of Lexa’s penis came into full contact with Clarke’s drenched center. Clarke lost her resolve. Her hips canted upwards of their own accord. But Lexa was too enthralled by the feeling of Clarke bare against her shaft to care. She moved in time with Clarke’s thrusts, the head of her dick rubbing against Clarke’s clit with each pass. It wasn’t what she’d been planning, but it was so worth the derailment of said plan. And judging by the noises that Clarke was making, she was in full agreement.

Breaking all the rules Clarke wrapped her legs around Lexa’s hips and her arms around her neck as she kissed her and they moved in tandem. “Fuck, baby,” she gasped after a particularly hard thrust that sent her mind into overdrive. “You feel so good on me.”

Lexa growled in agreement. “I have to be careful, though,” she groaned. “I can’t come near your pussy. I’m not wearing a condom.”

Clarke nearly came from Lexa’s use of the word ‘pussy.’ She’d never been a fan of the vulgarity before, but hearing it from Lexa made her knees go weak and her, well, her pussy to clench in excitement. “I know,” she said. “When you need to, come on me.”

Lexa paused momentarily, shocked. “Really?”

Clarke nodded. “I want to try it.”

“Can I… Can I come on your chest?”

Clarke grinned. “You really like my boobs don’t you?”

Lexa grinned back. “I really do.”

“Okay, let me just take this off,” Clarke said, sitting up just slightly to remove the bra that Lexa had left around her arms. She threw it aside. “You can continue.”

Lexa laughed and did. “I want you to come first, though,” she said, determined.

“It won’t take long,” Clarke said, already feeling the familiar tingles in her extremities as her orgasm quickly approached.

Lexa moved carefully, not wanting to accidentally enter Clarke without a condom (because she knew she would immediately come being bare inside her). But she moved with greater speed than before, knowing it was what Clarke needed to come. Within a few minutes, Clarke was gasping and digging her heels into her ass, begging her to keep going.

“Fuck, there, don’t stop,” Clarke gasped out, head thrown back as Lexa buried her face in her neck. Clarke cried out and Lexa felt even more liquid spilling out of her girlfriend as she came harder than she’d ever seen before. It nearly made her come right where she was, the head of her dick pressed firmly against Clarke’s clit.

But she managed to hold off until Clarke started to come down from her high. Barely.

“Fuck, Lexa,” Clarke sighed, coherent once again. Her center still spasmed with aftershocks. “Do it now.”

Lexa didn’t have to ask what Clarke meant. She grabbed a hold of her erection, still impossibly slick with Clarke’s juices, and began to pump as she moved upwards on the bed until she was straddling Clarke’s torso. Clarke had other ideas, however, and she batted Lexa’s hand away, taking over the pumping. She sat up just enough that the angle was better and licked the head of Lexa’s dick.

“Clarke,” Lexa gasped as she felt herself start to come. “I’m coming,” she warned.

Clarke leaned back and kept pumping until Lexa cried out and ropes of milky white come were shooting out of the tip, landing on her chest, coating her breasts.

Lexa nearly passed out at the sight of her own come literally dripping from Clarke’s hard nipple. “Fucking hell,” she groaned out and placed her hand on the headboard before lost her balance from the sheer force of her orgasm and the sight before her.

Clarke kept pumping her gently until she was completely spent and beginning to go soft. Then she pulled Lexa’s face to hers and kissed her deeply. “That was the single hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” Clarke said against her lips. “You’re so fucking sexy.”

“You are,” Lexa replied.

“I also need another shower,” Clarke teased.

Lexa pulled back and gave her a guilty look. “Sorry,” she murmured.

“Don’t be,” Clarke insisted. “Just come help me get clean?”

“In the shower?”

Clarke nodded. “We’re still alone for at least another two hours. And I’m not done with you yet.

Clarke was legitimately going to be the death of her. Not that she was complaining.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m just gonna go sit… over there… in the corner… And think about what I’ve done. I am going to hell for this. Yep. Yep. 
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: I am literally so beet red from writing this. I just don’t know what to think of myself. I’m putting myself in timeout now. Bye!


	19. School's Out for Summer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clexa finally say those three little words, summer vacation finally begins, Abby has a secret, and more smut (I can't stop writing smut omg)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovelies! Apologies for the slight delay in this chapter. Life got crazy. Hope you enjoy! :)

Clarke took Lexa back to the stargazing place to celebrate the completion of all their AP Exams. It was a school night, Thursday, so they both had a curfew, but they also had the place pretty much to themselves. There were a few people in the more popular areas with the fancy hammocks and pay-by-the-minute telescopes, but Clarke drove them to another favorite spot where no one else was around. They weren't dumb enough to have sex or go too far in a public place, but at least they could kiss a bit and not have to worry about anyone else.

This spot wasn't too much different from the first, except that it had several permanent fixture chairs made of treated wood that angled back to give the person sitting in it a good view of the sky. Kind of like those beach lounge chairs, only you couldn't change the angle. They were decently sized and the two girls had no issues fitting both of their bodies comfortably on one chair, the same comforter from last time beneath them. It was warm enough that they didn't need a blanket wrapped around them to ward off a chill.

They laid there for hours just talking, intermittently kissing, and just being in one another’s arms.

“I'm getting Lion King flashbacks,” Lexa mused at one point.

Clarke chuckled, then hummed. “I like Mufasa’s belief,” she said softly. “That stars are the souls of those who have passed. I know he said past kings, but maybe my dad is up there, too, looking down at us.”

Lexa gave her girlfriend a sad smile and kissed her temple softly. “I bet he'd be so proud of you,” she said softly.

Clarke smiled. “I know he'd love you,” she said.

“Oh yeah?”

Clarke nodded. “You're smart and a good person. And you treat me with respect and you just make me really happy.” She was gonna do it. She was going to tell Lexa that she loved her. Here goes.

“I love you.”

Only, Clarke hadn't said those words. Lexa had.

Clarke was stunned. Then she started laughing. Lexa looked confused and a bit hurt. Oh god she had to stop laughing. “I'm sorry,” she said, wiping a tear away. “I'm not laughing at you, just the situation.” She finally got a hold of herself and crushed her lips to Lexa's. “You stole my thunder. I was literally just about to say that.”

Lexa's lips quirked. “Say what?” She wanted to hear the words.

Clarke kissed her softly. “I love you.” She grinned. “Even if you are a thunder stealer.”

Lexa crashed their lips together in another heated kiss, this one slightly more PG-13 than they'd planned to keep their kissed, but neither of them cared in the moment.

“Say it again,” Clarke demanded when they paused for air.

“I love you,” Lexa repeated, pressing her forehead to Clarke’s. “I am unequivocally, undeniably, so completely in love with you, Clarke Jane Griffin.”

Clarke felt her eyes water, then tears spilling down her cheeks as she kissed Lexa again, then pulled back and laughed at herself. “I don't know why I'm crying,” she said.

Lexa kissed her cheeks, effectively wiping the tears away. “I hope it's because you're happy.”

Clarke nodded. “Definitely,” she whispered. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

 

***

 

“You know we're now officially Seniors.”

Clarke looked at Octavia across the table and stared. “You're right,” she said. “Jesus, I feel old.”

“You're seventeen,” Lexa said. “We're all seventeen.”

Clarke shrugged. “Yeah, but this time next year we'll be graduating and off to college.” She pouted, knowing that Lexa had her heart set on a soccer scholarship to UCLA while Clarke had had her eye on NYU for the last five years. Though, she was thinking more and more about doing pre-med, so maybe she’d end up in California anyway. She still wasn’t sure what she wanted to do--art or medicine? She liked both.

“I can't wait for that day,” Raven said from her position next to Octavia. “Cal Tech, here I come.” She’d already started working on her early admissions application to her dream college with hopes of a full ride scholarship. Clarke thought they'd be crazy to pass her up.

The four of them were seated in a booth at the local pizza place, celebrating the official end of the school year. As was tradition, Octavia was hosting her annual end of school sleepover before they parted for the summer. For the last three years, Raven worked as a camp counselor for a six week summer camp for underprivileged kids and Octavia's family did big family vacations. They were headed to Ireland in less than a week. Clarke was usually stuck at home alone for a good portion of the summer, at least since her dad died. But Lexa's family didn't have any big plans, either, save a week long trip to Seattle to visit family mid-July. It was the first summer in a long time that Clarke wouldn't be bored out of her mind waiting for her friends to return. She'd have Lexa.

Something also told her that this summer may be different since her mother seemed to be sticking to her word of being around more. Maybe they would hit the beach house again or go somewhere else. The only bad part about that would be missing out on time she could be spending with Lexa.

“I'm just glad it's summer,” Lexa said. “I like school okay, but why the hell does it start so early here? We didn't start until 8:25 in D.C.” Their first period bell rang at 7:15am.

“Something to do with the heat,” Clarke said. “There are a lot of students who have to walk upwards of two miles to school because the county is too cheap to hire more bus drivers. And the hottest part of the day is after three. So they make us be done by 2.”

Lexa grumbles. “Too fucking early,” she muttered.

“I hear ya,” Raven agreed. “To sleeping in!” She raised her glass of Sprite.

Everyone joined in the toast.

Clarke was watching Lexa carefully. That had been the first time she'd mentioned her school back in D.C. with a casual tone. Like the memory didn't send her to a dark place. She was currently laughing at Raven who was making over the top noises at the extra cheesy piece of pizza she was currently stuffing in her mouth. Clarke loved that laugh. She wanted to hear that laugh every chance she got.

She couldn't help but smile at her girlfriend as she used a knife and fork to eat her pizza. The others playfully teased her but Clarke thought it was adorable. Lexa caught her staring with her goofy grin.

“What?” she asked.

Clarke shook her head, still smiling. “Nothing,” she said. “I just can't believe how lucky I am to have met you.”

Lexa kissed her softly. Octavia made an ‘awww’ sound and put her hand on her heart. Raven gagged and told them to get a room. (Clarke flipped her off without breaking the kiss.)

She had to tell Lexa how she felt. And she was going to find a time to do it that night. She couldn't wait any longer.

Later, they were lounging in Octavia’s basement watching a movie on Netflix. Clarke couldn't even tell you which one--she hadn't paid attention to a single second of it.

Clarke and Lexa had claimed the plushy, giant overstuffed arm chair in the back corner of the room. Raven had convinced Anya to join them, and they shared the love seat against one wall while Octavia laid on the couch on the opposite wall. She'd grumbled about being the only one on who didn't have their significant other to cuddle with. To which Raven and Anya insisted they weren't together and they wouldn't be cuddling. (Spoiler alert: they were totally cuddling.)

Clarke’s legs were tossed across Lexa's thighs, their arms wrapped around one another and a blanket thrown over them as they spoke in low voices. They were far enough away from the other couches that they couldn't be heard over the sound of the movie so long as they were quiet. Clarke was currently telling Lexa why she hated the gynecologist.

“The doctor was nice enough,” she said. “But I don't want anyone down there but you. And it was so cold!”

Lexa laughed. “Poor baby,” she said, brushing back Clarke's hair. “Did they ask you embarrassing questions, too?”

Clarke shrugged. “Not really embarrassing. Just personal. It was whatever. But anyway, I have my pills now so we don't have to worry about that anymore. Well, once they take affect, I mean.”

Lexa grinned. “How long until they do?”

“Seven days after I start them,” Clarke replied. “But I can't start until the first day of my next period. Should be in about a week or so.”

Lexa glanced up at the others and made sure they were fully engrossed in the movie before she spoke again. They were. She turned back to Clarke and leaned in close to her ear. “Does that mean I get to fuck you without a condom soon?”

Instantly wet. That was the state of Clarke’s underwear at Lexa's question. The thought of Lexa coming inside her, without the latex barrier, aroused her nearly to the point of pain. She gulped. “My doctor said we should still use condoms to prevent STI’s,” she stated. “But, I mean, we're not doing it with anyone else…” She let herself trail off, deciding to kiss her girlfriend instead.

Then Lexa surprised her by pulling back after only a few seconds. “I only want to do what you're comfortable with, Clarke,” she said. “I love you.”

Clarke smiled. “I love you, too, Lex.” She suddenly, desperately wished that they were alone, in her own bedroom. Preferably naked. She told Lexa as much and the girl groaned softly.

“You don't play fair,” Lexa pouted.

Clarke just grinned and kissed her. She meant it to be a light, teasing kiss, but it quickly grew until Lexa was biting her lower lip. She made an involuntary noise of pleasure that attracted the attention of their compatriots.

“Hey you two!” Octavia’a voice called out, causing them to jump apart. The credits were rolling on the big screen TV. “No sucking face in my basement. Especially when not all of us have someone to suck face with.”

Clarke looked sheepishly at Octavia, conveniently avoiding eye contact with Anya. “Oops?”

“What? You fell on her lips, Griffin?” Raven piped up from the couch. “This is a PG atmosphere.”

Lexa snorted. “Oh, so that wasn't Anya’s hand I saw down your pants under that blanket a few minutes ago?”

Raven actually had the decency to blush. Anya looked smug. Octavia grabbed a throw pillow and chucked it at Raven and Anya.

“Stop getting frisky in my house!” Octavia yelled. Clarke was suddenly glad for the soundproofing of the room so her parents didn't hear.

“Oh, fuck off, O,” Raven said. “You're just mad because lover boy can't be here to finger you under your blanket.”

Clarke snickered and Lexa put her hand over her own mouth to hold in her laugh.

“Oh, fuck you, Reyes,” Octavia grumbled.

Raven smirked. “No, thanks,” she said slyly. “I already have someone for that.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and looked at Lexa to see her reaction. Lexa shrugged. “It is what it is,” she muttered, no longer shocked by Raven or her relationship or whatever with her sister.

“Ugh,” Octavia grunted, then stood and stretched. “I need more junk food and a break from you disgusting animals.” She headed towards the stairs, flicking the lights on in the process.

The romantic moment decidedly ruined, Clarke sighed and stood. “I'll go help O get some munchies.” She gave Lexa a quick kiss and left the room.

Anya also stood. “I need to pee,” she said then left the room.

Lexa stood to stretch, her back cracking multiple times. She loved Clarke and she would never complain about her draped across her, but she'd gotten quite stiff. As she stretched, she watched as Raven sat up on the couch, rolling her neck.

Lexa sighed and went to sit next to her, facing the girl. “Okay, so what's the deal with you two anyway?” she asked, wondering if she’d get more of an answer out of her than Anya.

“Who? Me a O? We joke around like that all the time. It's all in jest.”

Lexa shook her head. “No, dummy. You and my sister.”

Raven’s grin fell. “Oh,” she said. “Anya.”

Lexa nodded. “Yeah, her, the only sister I have.”

Raven looked away for a second then shrugged. “We're keeping it casual,” she said.

“Casual?”

“Yes,” Raven insisted. “Neither of us are looking for a relationship.”

Lexa made a noise of frustration. “Oh my god you two are already in a relationship. Don't you see it?”

Raven looked shocked. “We are not,” she protested, but it sounded weak.

Lexa just stared at her. She was about to say more when the sound of the bathroom door opening stopped her as Anya appeared in the doorway. She narrowed her eyes at them. “What are you two talking about?”

“Nothing,” Raven was quick to reply, but Lexa was fed up with their game.

She stood and faced her sister. “I was telling Raven here that you two are not ‘keeping it casual,’” she said, complete with air quotes. “Raven, you can't stop talking about Anya and how amazing she is. A lot of it is stuff I don't want to know like how good she is in bed, but then there’re other things that someone who is just keeping things casual wouldn't be going on and on about. And Anya, you pretend to be aloof when it comes to Raven, but I've never seen you light up so much as when she texts you or enters a room or someone just freaking mentions her name. You two idiots are already in relationship and just need to get your heads out of your asses and admit you like each other so we can all move on and stop pretending that you two aren't perfectly made for each other.”

Speech over, Lexa made her way to the bathroom and shut the door behind her, letting out a breath. She hoped those two got their acts together soon.

Raven gaped after Lexa, eyes wide and heart racing. Her eyes met Anya's and she turned red.

“You talk about how good I am in bed?”

“That's what you took from that?!” Raven cried out.

Anya shrugged. “I knew all the other stuff.”

Raven stood on shaky legs. “What other stuff? That I talk about you a lot?”

Anya nodded. “Lexa told me.”

“That tattletale,” Raven muttered. “She also said you freaking light up like a Christmas tree when someone mentions me. What's that about, Woods?”

Anya moved to stand in front of Raven. “It means I like you, you dumbass.”

“Did you just say you liked me and insult in one breath?”

“Is there a problem with that?” Anya asked.

“Only if you don't kiss me right now,” Raven replied.

Anya did, pulling the younger girl towards her with one hand on the back of her neck and the other wrapping around her waist. Soon, they were both panting.

“Does this mean you're my girlfriend?” Raven whispered.

“Fine,” Anya replied, drawing out the word with mock indignation in her voice. But she was smiling.

“Fucking finally!”

The jumped apart and looked at the doorway where Clarke, Octavia, and Lexa all stood, looking smug. Clarke had been the one to yell and cause them to jump back.

Octavia popped a piece of popcorn in her mouth as she watched the scene before her. “No celebration sex in this house,” she said.

Anya rolled her eyes. “Whatever,” she said, but when she turned back to Raven, her expression softened and she smiled. “We’ll finish this discussion later.”

Raven nodded. “Okay, girlfriend,” she said with a smug look. “I'm hungry. I hope you brought the chips and French onion dip. On second thought, I'll just have the chips.” She winked at Anya and everyone else groaned.

They lasted until about three in the morning before giving up and deciding to finally sleep. Octavia gave everyone one last threatening speech about no ‘hanky panky’ before turning off the lights. Octavia was on her usual couch to sleep, and Raven had made her typical mattress of blankets on the floor, Anya joined her of course.

Clarke skipped her usual couch. Technically, this was the first time she was able to sleep with Lexa. (Actually sleep, that is.) She made a mental note to ask her mom how she felt about Lexa sleeping over now that they had moved from the open to locked door policy.

“I still wish we were alone,” Clarke whispered into Lexa's ear as the huddled together against the rapidly cooling air.

“Shh,” Lexa said. “Don't start something you can't finish.”

Clarke pouted. She really wanted to finish it. But she wasn't about to tempt fate and face Octavia’s wrath. She sighed. “Tomorrow,” she said. “My mom will be working.”

“Now that you two figured out when you can fuck again, go to sleep.”

They followed Octavia's annoyed plea.

 

***

 

“I thought your mom was working,” Lexa said as Clarke's pulled into her driveway just before eleven the following morning. A car that Clarke had never seen sat in the driveway and when she opened the garage door, her mother’s car was inside.

“That's what she said,” Clarke said, brow knit. She grabbed her phone to see if she had a missed message. “Oh. She texted me a few hours ago. I didn't notice.” She opened the message and read it aloud. “‘Switched shifts with Dr. Nelson. Let me know when you'll be home.’” She looked at Lexa across the console. “Oops?” She quickly responded to the text that's she’d just seen it and that she was already in the driveway.

Lexa sighed. There went their afternoon plans that did not involve clothing. Dammit. She took a deep breath in attempt to calm her previously aroused state that was due in part to Clarke’s dirty talk on the drive over and in part to her own wild imagination. “Well, we can hang out still.”

Clarke grumbled. “I suppose that's okay,” but she smiled.

“Who's car is that, anyway?” Lexa asked.

Clarke shrugged. “No idea,” she did. She had a sinking feeling in her gut, though. “What if… what if my mom had a sleepover, too?” Oh god. Was her mom dating someone?

Lexa gave her a concerned look. “How would you feel about that?”

Clarke swallowed against the lump in her throat. “I don't know,” she said softly. “He's only been gone three years.”

Lexa licked her lips as she thought about her response. On the one hand, three years could be considered a long time. But on the other hand, to Clarke, three years was a blink of an eye. Instead of talking, she placed a comforting hand on Clarke's thigh.

Before Clarke could say anything more, her phone buzzed against her lap. She glanced at it and saw a new text from her mom.

MOTHER DEAREST (10:57AM):  
>> Do me a favor and stay there a moment. I'll meet you outside.

Clarke read and reread the cryptic message before her face morphed into a look of disgust and she thrust her phone towards Lexa. “Oh gross does that mean what I think it does?”

Lexa read the message and looked up at Clarke, face sympathetic. “Um, not necessarily,” she tried to reason.

Clarke put her forehead on the steering wheel and groaned. “It totally does. My mom is hooking up with someone. I'm gonna throw up.”

Lexa huffed. “Okay, Clarke, I love you. I really do. But you need to grow up.” She said it in a loving tone, but her message was the same.

Clarke lifted her head and stared at her girlfriend. “Excuse me?”

Lexa turned in her seat and placed both her hands on Clarke's cheeks, forcing her to look her in the eye. “I know you miss your dad. Of course you do. But your mom dating someone else doesn't mean she doesn't miss him or has stopped loving him. You told me how great of a person was. Wouldn't he want her to move on and be happy? Three years is a decent amount of grieving time.”

Clarke found herself calming st Lexa's words. The brunette always had a way of calming her down. She sighed again. “I guess you're right,” she muttered. “But I'm not calling him ‘Dad.’”

Lexa smiled and shook her head. “No one expects you to, I'm sure,” she said. Then she kissed her softly. As she pulled away, movement caught her eye and she turned to find Abby walking towards the car with someone in tow. “Mr. Kane?!”

Clarke whipped her head in the direction that Lexa was staring, open-mouthed. “What the fuck?” she said, confused by the sight of her former AP Lit teacher in her driveway. “Why… how?”

Now thoroughly confused, Clarke pushed open her door and stepped out to face her mother who was now standing just in front of her. “Why is my Lit teacher here?” she asked, now wondering if there was something wrong with her AP test. Or her final. Had she done poorly on the written final just three days prior? Or, oh god, had she failed the AP Exam so horribly that he was forced to flunk her for the semester? She'd felt so confident after taking that test!

Wait, scores weren't going to be released for several more weeks.

So then…

“Are you dating my teacher?!”

“Clarke,” Abby started, glancing behind her at an awkwardly shifting Mr. Kane. “I--I had hoped to talk to you about this in a different setting.”

Clarke felt a headache coming on. She was about to fire back a retort full of attitude when she felt Lexa grip her hand, having exited the car and coming to stand beside her. She remembered what she'd said in the car and looked at her. Lexa gave her a reassuring look. Clarke squeezed her hand and turned her attention back to her mother. “I need coffee,” she muttered. “A gallon of coffee.”

“Clarke, are you hungover?”

Clarke snorted. “No, Mom, I'm not hungover. I just ate too much and didn't get much sleep and I nearly walked in on my mother doing god knows what with my teacher. I need a moment very strong coffee to wake up so I can process this.” She pushed forward and made her way into the house before Abby could respond.

Lexa looked uncomfortable. She'd managed to avoid Abby in the last several weeks, and it was the first time she saw her face to face since the older woman found out she was having sex with her daughter. “I should, ah, go,” she said. She wasn't looking forward to the walk home in the morning heat, but she didn't have her bike.

Abby shook her head. “Don't be silly,” she said. “Go on in. You help her stay calm. She and I both need that right now.”

Lexa nodded and grabbed both their bags from the car before moving towards the door. “Um, it was, uh, nice to see you, Mr. Kane,” she said awkwardly.

“You, too, Lexa,” the teacher said, grateful for the change of topic, however brief it was.

Lexa went inside in search of Clarke. She dropped their bags in the mud room and toed off her shoes before entering the kitchen. The blonde was staring at the Keurig machine as the water she'd just added heated up.

“Hey,” she said, sliding next to her.

“Hey,” Clarke said softly.

A silence fell between them, but it wasn't awkward or tense. Rather, it was comforting. Especially when Lexa brought her hand up to rub soft circles on Clarke's back.

Clarke perked up as the light indicated that the machine was ready to brew, and she picked the biggest size possible. She groaned in pleasure as she finally took a sip and the hot liquid along with Lexa's presence refueled her soul.

Shortly after getting that first sip of coffee, Abby returned, alone.

“Clarke, we need to talk,” she said.

Clarke studied her mother over the rim of the giant cup of coffee. “Yes, we do.”

Lexa looked between the two of them, debating if she should stay or leave for this. Clarke answered for her, pressing a kiss to her cheek and giving her a reassuring nod. “I'll meet you upstairs,” she said softly.

Lexa returned her nod. “Just, remember what I said, okay?”

Clarke nodded again and Lexa left them to talk. Clarke sighed and placed her coffee on the kitchen island, hands wrapped around the mug. “I'm sorry if I was out of line,” she started, looking into the dark liquid of her mug. “I was just surprised.”

Abby sighed and sat on one of the tall stools at the island. “I didn't want you to find out like this, Clarke.”

Clarke raised her eyes. “So you are… dating him?”

Abby rubbed her temples. “It's complicated,” she replied. “But, yes, I guess you could say we are dating.”

Clarke’s shoulder slumped and she returned her gaze to the mug. She remained silent.

“I grieved for nearly three years,” Abby said after a few moments of silence.

Clarke nodded, but didn't look up or say anything.

“I was going to tell you,” Abby continued. “Soon. I wasn't… I didn't want to hide it, but…” She trailed off with a noise of frustration. “Clarke will you please look at me?”

Clarke finally did just that, meeting her mother's eye. She licked her dry lips and sighed. “I know it's been nearly three years,” Clarke said. “And I know that's a long time. But it's also not long. I just, I need to process this. Also, my teacher?!”

Abby looked sheepish. “I didn't realize he was your teacher until the third date,” she said.

Clarke blinked. Third date? “How many dates have you had exactly? Without telling me?”

“Four,” Abby said. “Five was the date I was going to tell you about.”

“But my teacher,” Clarke repeated. “I'll likely have him for 12th Grade English since he's the only one that teaches honors. Oh god, I'm going to have to take general with all the slackers. Mom, I can't have general 12th English on my transcript. I won't get into a good school. My GPA--”

“Okay, enough,” Abby interrupted, holding up a hand. “Clarke, this is not the end of the world. You will not have to miss out on honors English. What Marcus and I have--don't make that face--what we do does not affect you and your studies. Got it?”

Clarke grumbled. “I guess. I don't have to, like, hang out with him, do I? Because that's so weird. Teachers should only exist at school. They should not be dating your mother.”

Abby stood and rounded the island. She placed a hand on Clarke’s cheek. “I promise that I will not make you think of your English teacher as a human being with interests outside of school.”

“Gross,” Clarke muttered. Then she sighed. “Lexa made some good points, so I was ready to cautiously accept this all before I saw Mr. Kane. Now I just feel weird.”

“Well, I really like him, so you better get used to it.”

Clarke narrowed her eyes. “I refuse to call him ‘Dad.’”

“Noted,” Abby said. “Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go get some errands done. You two be safe.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. Her mother's new favorite way to say goodbye when she was leaving them alone was ‘be safe.’ “Yes, mother.” She grinned. “You, too.” She left the kitchen before Abby could reply.

Upstairs, she found Lexa flipping through the Netflix queue. The girl dropped the remote as soon and she entered the room and closed the door behind her. (She also locked it.)

“So?” Lexa said, sitting on up on her knees. “What's up with your mom and Mr. Kane? Are they dating?”

Clarke nodded. “Yes, but I don't want to talk about it,” she said. She pulled off her shirt.

“Oh,” Lexa said, shocked. “Clarke, your mom.”

“Left for run some errands,” Clarke said as she unbuttoned her pants. “So we have a limited amount of time to do this.”

Lexa sighed and grabbed Clarke's hands as they reached behind her to unhook her own bra. “Clarke wait,” she said. “Sex isn't going to make you feel any better about this.”

Clarke realized how it looked and laughed. “Lexa, I'm fine,” she said honestly. “I promise I'll talk about it and my feelings to my hearts content later. I just wasn't kidding when I said we have a limited time. And after last night and this morning, I'm so fucking horny.” She pulled off her bra and stood there in just her underwear. “Now, are you gonna fuck me or am I gonna have to take care of this myself?” She gave Lexa a sly grin.

Lex stood and carefully regarded her girlfriend, looking for any trace of distress. “Are you sure you're okay?”

Clarke leaned in to kiss her, imploring her to continue. “I promise,” she said. “It's a little weird and I freaked out a little, but I'm good. I just really want to finish what we started.”

Lexa laughed and kissed Clarke, her mind already focused on getting naked.

“You have on too many clothes,” Clarke said as they kissed. She pressed Lexa back toward the bed as she pulled at her tank top.

Lexa smirked and raised her arms, allowing the garment to be disposed of. She pulled her own bra off as Clarke's hands went to tackle the fastenings on her jeans. In no time, they were both fully naked and lying on the bed, Clarke hovering over Lexa.

“I wanna try something,” Clarke said as she handed Lexa the condom. It would be another two weeks before her pills would take effect.

“Hmm, what?” Lexa asked as she ripped open the packet and rolled the latex onto her shaft, glaring at the offending item as she thought about her conversation with Clarke the night before. The thought of sliding into her with nothing between them had made her nearly come right there in her pants.

“Like this,” Clarke said, pulling Lexa out of her daydream of fucking her girlfriend without a condom. She looked up to see Clarke moving to position herself on her hands and knees, wiggling her ass and sending Lexa a sly grin over her shoulder.

“Fuck,” Lexa gasped as she took in the sight before her. Clarke's ass was on full display, the healthy globes of her buttocks a tantalizing sight. Lexa let her eyes roam as her mouth literally watered as she let her eyes shift from her ass down to her center, slick with need. She was staring, she knew, but she couldn't move, paralyzed by the sight.

“Lexa,” Clarke finally interrupted her thoughts. Her voice was raw and husky with pure, dripping desire. “Please. Fuck me.”

That made Lexa move, a growl ripping from her throat as she surged up onto her knees and gripped Clarke's hips. She brought one hand down to test her readiness, gasping at how fucking wet Clarke was already as she sank two, then three fingers inside her. They'd barely touched.

“I've been soaked all morning,” Clarke gasped out as if able to read Lexa's mind. “I need you.”

Lexa pulled her fingers out and gripped Clarke's hip, leaving a trail of wetness from her fingers on the pale skin. “You sure you want me like this?” Lexa's asked as she lined herself up and let the tip of her penis tease her entrance.

“Yes,” Clarke groaned out. “I need this.”

Lexa surged forward, sinking nearly her entire length inside in one long thrust.

Clarke let out an animalistic sound of pleasure and arched her back, pushing her hips back to meet Lexa. “Fuck, Lexa, yes,” she cried out.

Lexa drilled momentarily, forcing herself to count to ten in attempt to stave off her impending orgasm as she watched her length disappear into Clarke.

“Lexa, move,” Clarke begged after several moments. She wiggled her hips in encouragement.

“You want me to fuck you?” Lexa asked as she leaned over Clarke and placed her lips next to her ear. The moment pushed her even further inside, making the blonde whimper.

“Yes,” Clarke hissed. “Hard. Do it hard.”

That's all it took for Lexa to break. She pushed herself up, dug her fingers into luscious hips, and began thrusting deep and hard as she watched Clarke closely to gauge her reaction to the roughness. If her moans and gasps and arching back were any indication, she loved it.

This wasn't the soft, tentative, intimate encounters that they'd already experienced with one another. No, this was something else entirely. A new path to explore. A new piece of their relationship.

This was fucking in its purest form. Rough, raw, sinful.

There were no whisperings of sweet nothings in one another’s ear. No soothing caresses. No need to reassure the other that everything was okay (because they already knew it was).

Clarke gasped and shut her eyes tightly as Lexa pounded into her from behind. She lowered her chest to the bed and presented her ass for her lover, willing to give her everything. Her hands frantically searched for something to hold onto, finding purchase on the footboard of her bed and gripping so tightly that her knuckles turned white.

She felt her insides start to tingle with what was sure to be an explosive climax, so she reached down with her left hand and circled her own clit, ready to come.

When Lexa realized what Clarke was doing, she nearly lost it again. She faltered in the steady thrusting for just a second, but quickly resumed the pace.

“I'm so close,” Clarke said and it was music to Lexa's ears.

“Come,” Lexa gasped out. “Come around me as I fuck you from behind.” Never had Lexa thought that she'd be so vocal, so bold, in bed, but Clarke made her want to do a lot of things that she'd never thought she would.

It wasn't long until Lexa felt the now-familiar flutterings of Clarke's walls around her as her orgasm approached, then created. And it wasn't long after Clarke screamed out that she was coming and bucked her hips into Lexa's that Lexa was also coming, rutting as deep as she could into Clarke as she spilled into the condom.

“I need you to do that to me again,” Clarke said once they'd both caught their breaths. Lexa had rolled off her back and quickly disposed of the condom by wrapping it in a tissue which Clarke had half heartedly tossed onto the floor. They'd deal with it later.

“Now?” Lexa asked, glancing surreptitiously at her now flaccid penis as it rested against Clarke’s thigh. “I need a minute. Or five. You killed me.”

Clarke laughed into her shoulder. “Not now,” she said, wincing slightly at the delicious burn between her legs. She liked the feeling of being thoroughly fucked. “I need to recover first.”

Lexa pulled back slightly and gave her a concerned look. “I didn't hurt you did I?”

Clarke kissed her in reassurance. “No,” she said. “I'm not hurt. Just a bit raw. And I love it. So stop looking like that.”

Lexa sighed and nodded.

“What I meant was I need you to do that again once my pills take effect,” Clarke explained.

Lexa narrowed her eyes. “What do you mean?”

Clarke grinned. “What made me come was the idea of you coming inside me without a condom, filling me with all of you.”

Lexa hissed at the thought and felt her dick start to harden. “Fuck, Clarke,” she groaned. “Is that really what you want?”

Clarke nodded. “I don't know why, but it really turns me on to think about. And once I'm on the pill and it starts working, I want you to do it.”

“Is that really safe, though?” Lexa asked. She wanted nothing more that to fuck Clarke without a condom, but she also didn't want to risk being a teenaged parent.

Clarke nodded. “As long as I take them as directed, they're like 99.9% effective. And with your low count, it would be a freaking medical miracle if one of your swimmers managed to knock me up. We'd go down in medical history. They'd want to study us and write papers and feature us in conference symposiums, which would mean a shit ton of money for us so that would at least be nice.”

Lexa snorted at the mental image Clarke's words created, then she kissed her again. “God I love you,” she said on a laugh. “Even when you're utterly ridiculous.”

Clarke smiled widely. “You love me because of my ridiculousness, not in spite of it.”

“You have no proof,” Lexa said.

Clarke pushed Lexa onto her back and straddled her abs, her still drenched center pressing firmly to the muscles just below Lexa's navel. “Do I really need proof?” she asked as she leaned forward so that their breasts grazed one another. Her hips also moved, slowly back and forth to create a delicious friction against her sensitive clit.

Lexa had already forgotten what she was trying to prove as she pulled Clarke in for a kiss. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. There you go. Was it worth the wait? ;) 
> 
> Also, I want to do a survey/entertain requests. If there's something you'd like to see (can be smutty or just something general) happen, tell me! I don't promise to write it in but I do promise to seriously think about it. Particularly since these horny motherfuckers can't keep it in their pants! Let me know :) 
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: I draw a lot of the storylines from my own experiences. My dad died when I was 10 and during my freshman year of high school, I found out my mom was dating my science teacher when I got home early from softball practice and found his car there. It was awkward but I got over it quickly. They married two years later, and I do actually call him "Dad" now. (No, Clarke will never ever ever call Marcus "Dad" okay? Okay.)


	20. The Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone from Lexa's past reappears, Clarke is hella protective, Anya learns just how terrible Raven's mother is, and Abby surprises Clarke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The amount of smut-tastic comments I got on the last chapter shouldn't have amazed me, but it did. You guys are awesome and I have recorded all requested. Keep 'em coming if you think of more as we go along. :) 
> 
> No smut in this chapter. 
> 
>  
> 
> Also, WARNING!!!! This chapter involves a lot of homophobic slurs, vile language, threats of sexual assault/rape, and someone telling someone else that they should kill themselves. Please read at your own risk. 
> 
> This chapter was extremely hard to write, in particular the messages from a certain vile creature. I felt sick just writing those words. Poor Lexa :(
> 
>  
> 
> DISCLAIMER: I have next to zero knowledge of how a lot of law-related things work unless it has to do with Education laws. My knowledge is limited to the oh-so-accurate things I learned from Bones, Castle, CSI, and Quantico. I will likely make mistakes about the legal proceedings, so please forgive me. I will not be going too in-depth with the legal aspect for this very reason. Thank you! :)

It happened two days after Octavia and her family had left for Ireland. Raven was due to ship out for her summer camp counseling job in five days. The three of them--Clarke, Lexa, and Raven--were sitting around the pool in the Blakes’ backyard. The benefits of being a longtime Blake family friend was getting to use the pool when they were gone. Clarke was being paid two hundred bucks to keep the cat fed, water the plants, and check in on the house every day during the three weeks they'd be gone.

(Octavia had cornered Clarke before they left and threatened her with bodily harm if she and Lexa had sex in her room while they were gone. What Octavia didn't know wouldn’t hurt, right? Besides, she'd washed the sheets.)

They'd just gotten out of the water in preparation to devour the pizza that Anya was bringing with her when Lexa looked at her phone to see if she had any missed notifications. Raven had gone inside to wait for Anya, and Clarke was busy wringing the water out of her hair before fashioning it into a messy bun. When she was done, she looked up and noticed Lexa's pale face as she stared at her phone, jaw clenching.

“Lex?” Clarke said, dropping her towel. “What's wrong?”

Lexa didn't say anything. She just shook her head and gripped her phone so hard that Clarke was afraid she'd either break it or hurt herself. She was immediately at her side, concerned.

“Lexa, talk to me,” she said softly. “Look at me.” She felt her stomach clench in worry when Lexa finally met her eye and she saw the tears forming.

“We moved here to get away from it,” Lexa finally said, voice heavy with emotion.

“Get away from what?” Clarke asked, hand on her cheek.

Lexa opened her mouth but couldn't speak. She thrust her phone into Clarke’s hand instead. Clarke looked down. The screen had locked but she knew the passcode so she typed it in. Facebook Messenger was open and a a string of messages, all sent in the last hour, were on the screen from someone named Cody Landers.

>>I found u bitch [sent at 7:33pm]

>>did u really think u could just run away and it would solve all ur problems? A freak like u will never be able to run [sent at 7:41pm]

>>aw what's the matter? Afraid I'll tell ur new girlfriend what a freak show u are? Clarke is it?[sent at 7:55pm]

>>this Clarke chick is a real hottie. Makes me wonder wut she doing with a freak like u. [sent at 7:59pm]

>>seriously id pay a lot of money to fuk her. I bet she sucks cock real good. She just needs a real man to fuck her pussy and show her what she's missing n those boobs i bet she a great titty fuk [sent at 8:05pm]

>>she let u fuk her with that thing between ur legs? I bet she a really kinky slut if she with u probably let's u fuk all her holes [sent at 8:12pm]

>>I can't beliebe I use to have a crush on u before I knew u were a freak it makes me sick just to think about it [sent at 8:18pm]

>>but u just a mutant fag [sent at 8:21pm]

>>why r u still alive? u should just off urself and make everyone happy [sent at 8:26pm]

>>freak [sent at 8:27pm]

  
Clarke’s jaw clenched so hard that, later on, she was surprised she didn't crack a tooth. She dropped the phone onto the tabletop with more force than she meant, causing it to make a loud clang. She ignored it and embraced Lexa fiercely, feeling an overwhelming need to protect her.

“I'm so sorry, baby,” Clarke whispered, feeling Lexa's sobs against her shoulder. “I'm so sorry.”

“Pizza!” Raven burst out as she rejoined them carrying two pizza boxes and a jumbo order of extra hot wings, Anya right behind her. “Break it up, you two. I'm hungry.”

Clarke looked at them over Lexa's shoulder and caught Anya’s eye, sending her a pleading look.

Anya immediately went into big sister mode. “What happened?” she asked, rushing forward. “Lexa what's wrong?”

Raven’s cheerful mood instantly changed when she realized that Lexa’s movements hadn't been laughter, but that she was crying. She dropped the pizzas onto the table, forgotten.

Clarke knew Lexa was in no state to answer, so she pointed at her phone on the table. Anya immediately picked it up and, after Clarke had to put in the passcode, she read the messages, feeling her rage rise with each passing second. “I'm going to fucking murder this fuckwad. I'm going to get on a plane to Washington and literally rip off his minuscule balls and stuff them down his motherfucking throat until he chokes.”

Raven stared at her girlfriend wide eyed and a bit turned on. But this wasn't the time or place. She grabbed the phone and read, finding herself matching Anya’s rage. “I'm going with you,” she spat out. “I'm going with and I'm going to hack all his socials media accounts and post these screenshots. Then I'm changing his password. Then I'll hack into the school's records and fuck up his transcripts so hard he won't be able to get into fucking clown school. And then--”

“Raven, stop,” Clarke said, knowing none of this would help Lexa.

“Clarke this asshole is harassing your girlfriend and now he’s dragged you into it,” Raven protested.

“None of that will help,” Lexa said, finally pulling herself away from Clarke.

“But, Lexa,” Anya started.

Lexa shook her head. “No,” she said. “I don't want petty revenge.” She looked at Clarke who nodded, knowing what she was going to say next. “I want justice. Do any of you have Lincoln’s number?”

 

***

 

Lincoln was able to meet with them the following day, after arranging a Skype meeting with the Honorable Evelyn Rivers, aka Lincoln’s aunt the United States Court of Appeals Judge.

“Thank you for doing this, Lincoln,” Lexa said as they all sat around the dining room table at the Blakes’ house. It was the safest place to do this without any of their parents walking in.

“Of course,” Lincoln said as he logged into his Skype account on Clarke’s MacBook. “That asshat is the lowest of the low.”

Lexa nodded in agreement. The messages hadn't stopped rolling in the previous night. As the night progressed, it became clear that Cody was on something--either high or drunk. And as he got more high or more drunk, his messages became even more vulgar, abusive, and vicious.

Clarke was glad that she’d convinced Lexa not to look a them beyond the ones they saw by the pool, particularly the ones where he explicitly detailed what he wanted to do to Clarke. That was when Raven convinced them both to stop reading. Beyond that, Raven was the only one with detailed knowledge of what was said.

Lexa had wanted to immediately block him and delete her Facebook profile, but Raven had suggested that she didn't do that just yet. With each message this boy sent, he was digging himself a deeper and deeper hole. So Lexa turned off all Facebook messenger app notifications on her phone, including those stupid red bubbles. She'd been glad she'd followed Raven’s suggestion when Cody mentioned the incident in the locker room, essentially admitting his involvement.

So instead, while Raven kept a close eye on Lexa’s phone as she hung out with Anya by the pool, Clarke and Lexa further defiled Octavia’s bedroom. She figured the girl would understand. Clarke did her best to distract her. Since she'd just started her period, sex was off the table, but that didn't mean Lexa couldn't benefit from Clarke's talented tongue. She'd been grateful for the distraction because when Clarke's mouth was on her, she could think of nothing else.

Now, Lexa sat next to Lincoln while the others stood nearby for moral support, but were off-screen. Then there was in incoming call and Lincoln answered it. There was a few seconds of fuzziness before the screen cleared and an older woman in what Clarke estimated to be her early- to mid-fifties appeared, smiling when she saw her nephew. Judge Evelyn Rivers.

“Good morning, Linc,” she greeted.

“Good morning, Aunt Evie,” Lincoln replied. “Thank you for agreeing to talk to us.”

“Anything for my favorite nephew,” Evelyn said. “Now, you said you had something for me to check into? You were vague on the details.”

Lincoln nodded. “Sorry, I figured I'd let Lexa here tell you since I'm not fully privy to all of the details. This is Lexa Woods, a friend of Octavia’s.”

“Hi Judge Rivers,” Lexa greeted.

“Oh please, call me Evie,” Evelyn replied. “And it's nice to meet you, dear.”

“Also here are Lexa's sister, Anya,” Lincoln said and Anya stepped into the frame briefly and waved, “and Lexa's girlfriend, Clarke.” Clarke mirrored Anya’s wave. “And Lexa's other friend, Raven.” Raven waved.

“Goodness, what a support system,” Evie said with a warm smile.

“I'm lucky,” Lexa said. “Since moving here, at least.”

Evie nodded. “Okay, Lexa, how can I help you?”

Lexa took a deep breath and began. “Well, I guess the first thing to know is that I'm intersex,” she said.

Evie nodded. “I'm familiar with the unwarranted stigma that comes with intersexism,” Evie replied. “I take it something happened because of it?”

Lexa nodded. “I'm from D.C., I grew up there and was attending Winslow Academy on scholarship when some kids found out about me and assaulted me in the locker room.”

Anya stepped in. “Not just assaulted,” she chimed in. “They threatened her with scissors and beat the crap out of her. She was in the hospital for a week.”

Evie gave a compassionate look. “I'm so sorry you had to experience that, Lexa,” she said. “I know that doesn't help, but I am.”

Lexa nodded. “The thing is, the main kid that led the attack, Cody Landers, is a politician’s son.”

“Landers? As in Jeffrey Landers? Mississippi state senator?”

Lexa nodded. “The one and only. Because of their power and my being a lowly nothing scholarship kid, they weren't charged with anything. And the school barely gave them a slap on the wrist.”

“You never got any sort of justice,” Evie said.

Lexa shook her head. “No. So my parents moved us out here and things were finally looking up. I made new friends, found an amazing girlfriend. It was going so well. I was getting over it, moving on with my life. Then…” she trailed off, unable to continue.

Clarke stepped in, placing a hand on Lexa's shoulder for comfort. “This Cody kid found her Facebook page and sent her over a hundred messages between yesterday and this morning. They were quite vulgar and threatening and he said that she should kill herself many times. Then he threatened to find her do it himself. He also mentioned the attack and essentially admitted his guilt.”

“He also threatened Clarke,” Lexa jumped in. “Threatened to-to rape her. It's one thing when he threatened me, but Clarke didn't do anything to him.”

“You didn't do anything to him either,” Clarke said. “What he said to you was not okay.”

“I know,” Lexa said. “I just, when he brought you into it… I can't let you get hurt because of me.”

Evelyn watched carefully from the other side of the Skype call. It was clear that these two were in love and good for one another. “Clarke, I can tell that you really care about and are supportive of Lexa. That's going to be really important if we can move forward on this.”

Clarke nodded. “I'm here,” she said. “In whatever way you or Lexa needs me. I'm here.”

“That's excellent,” she said. “Now, about these messages. Do you still have them?”

Lexa nodded. “I was going to delete them and block him but Raven suggested that they might come in handy later.”

“She's right,” Evelyn said. “Can you send me screenshots of them? I know it's hard to look at them, but it'll help.”

Lexa nodded. “I'll get Raven to do it,” she said. “She's a tech wizard.” Raven nodded in agreement.

They went over several more specifics and Evelyn asked some more questions to create a full picture. As they wrapped up the call, she had one last thing to ask. “Now, you're still a minor in the eyes of the law,” she said. “I'll need to be in contact with your parents about this. Will that be a problem?”

Lexa sighed. Intellectually, she'd known that she was going to have to let her parents in on the situation, but she'd kind of hoped to keep them out of it. They'd just worry about her. “It won't,” she said reluctantly. “I haven't told them about this new development yet because I wanted to see what you'd have to say first. But I promise I'll tell them tonight.”

Evelyn nodded. “Good. I hope that I can help you, Lexa. No one should have to go through what you've been through. Do I have your permission to take this to one of my contacts in law enforcement? He's a lead detective in the Special Victims Unit.”

Lexa licked her lips, hesitating. She looked around at all the people who cared about her. Their supportive looks made her feel safe. She turned back to Evelyn. “Okay,” she said. “It's fine.”

They finished the conversation by exchanging contact information and, with a promise from Lexa to have her parents get in contact ASAP, they ended the call.

Lexa slumped in her chair, feeling physically drained. Unsurprisingly, she hadn't slept well the night before.

“You okay, kid?” Anya asked as she hugged her sister.

“I'm not a kid,” Lexa said. “But yeah. I think so.” They parted.

“I'll get on my mission to send Evie the screenshots,” Raven said. “Is it okay if I log onto your Facebook on my own laptop?”

Lexa nodded her consent. “The quicker the better,” she said.

“I need a ride home,” Raven said, looking at Anya.

Anya hesitated, looking at Lexa.

Lexa waved her off. “Go, I'm fine,” she said.

“I'll be with her,” Clarke said, her hands on both of Lexa's shoulders. “I'll call if anything happens.”

Anya considered for a moment, then nodded. “Okay, Clarke. You better take care of her.”

“I will.”

Anya and Raven left.

“I should go, too,” Lincoln said. “Octavia demanded that I fill her in as soon as we were finished. She hates that she can't be here right now.”

Lexa gave him a small smile. “It's okay,” she said. “I can feel her support in the six dozen messages she sent me last night. Tell her I said thank you and to stop worrying and enjoy Ireland.”

Soon, it was just Clarke and Lexa left in the large house. Clarke led Lexa to the basement and turned on some mind-numbing show via Netflix as they settled in their favorites oversized chair. “You should try and get some sleep,” Clarke murmured into Lexa's ear as they cuddled.

Lexa shook her head. “Not yet,” she said. “I just want to sit here and be with you. I feel safe here. Like nothing bad can happen. You know?”

Clarke did know. She felt the same way. Whenever she was with Lexa, it was as if the rest of the world, all the bad things and negative energy, didn't exist. “It's our own bubble,” she said.

Lexa nodded. “I don't want to leave the bubble.”

“We don't have to,” Clarke said. “Not yet.”

“Good,” Lexa said softly. Despite her earlier words, it wasn't long before her breaths had deepened and she had fallen asleep against Clarke's shoulder. Clarke held her close and watched the TV for several moments before she felt herself drifting off.

Clarke could hardly believe her eyes when she opened them and saw that it was nearing three in the afternoon. They slept for nearly four hours.

And Lexa was still sleeping. She didn't want to wake her, but her bladder was screaming for relief. She sighed and pressed a kiss to Lexa's temple. Lexa grumbled, still asleep.

“Lexa, baby, wake up,” Clarke said. “I have to pee.”

Lexa slowly came to, blinking in surprise. She really hadn't meant to fall asleep. “Oh,” she said. “How long was I asleep?”

“We both were,” Clarke said. “Like, three and a half hours.”

Lexa's eyes widened in surprise. “No wonder I'm starving,” she said. “And have to pee.”

“I call dibs,” Clarke said. “I gotta change my tampon.” She stood and stretched before making her way to the bathroom. She peed and changed her tampon, grumbling as she did so. She envied that Lexa never had to deal with this part of being a woman, but then again, she didn't envy the bullshit stigma that came along with being intersex.

“Clarke hurry,” Lexa said as she knocked on the door. “I'm about to piss myself.”

Clarke chuckled as she finally finished up and stood, flushed the toilet, and pulled her underwear and pants up.

“Sorry,” she said as she opened the door. She turned to wash her hands as Lexa moved past her and unzipped her pants. She lowered her shorts and lifted the toilet set, then let out a relieved sound as she began to pee.

Another thing Clarke was envious of. Being able to pee standing up. But once again, not worth the bullshit.

It was the first time Lexa had peed in front of Clarke, but she'd been so desperate that she hadn't given it a second thought. As she finished and retucked herself in her shorts, she shot Clarke a worried glance. But all she saw was a casual Clarke, drying her hands. Most people would have starred in discomfort at the sight of a girl standing up to pee. But not Clarke. She made it seem like the most normal thing in the world.

Because to Clarke, it was completely normal.

Lexa zipped her pants, flushed, and moved to wash her own hands.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Clarke interrupted.

Lexa looked at her in confusion. “What?”

Clarke raised an eyebrow and looked at the toilet seat. “Seat down.”

Lexa gave her a sheepish look. “Whoops?” She wasn't used to having to deal with the seat. She had her own bathroom, after all. She put the seat down and continued to wash her hands.

“You do that at my house, too,” Clarke said. Her tone was teasing, though, rather than accusatory. “One time I went to pee in the middle of the night and fell in. I think I literally yelled out ‘Jesus take the wheel!’”

Lexa let out a loud snort at the mental image and covered her mouth with her hand that was still wet with water. “Oh my god,” she said behind her hand. “You did not.”

Clarke grinned. “No,” she said. “I saw that it was up first. But I could have.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and playfully punched Clarke's shoulder. “I'm sorry,” she said. “I'll do my best to remember from now on.”

Clarke kissed her nose. “I know you will. Now let's go get some food.”

 

***

 

“Seriously, why won't you guys let me just hack his accounts?” Raven pouted, sitting up in her bed to look down at Anya who was lying on her stomach next to her.

Anya rolled her eyes--again--and shook her head. “We've been over this, Raven. If you hack his accounts, the defense will just say that it wasn't him doing the messaging. Then he'll get off again. I won't let my sister go through that all over again.”

Raven grumbled but knew she was right. “Fine,” she said, lying back down, but propping herself up on her elbow.

“Seriously, Rae,” Anya said. “Promise me you won't do anything other than be supportive.”

Raven sighed. “I promise not to do anything other than be supportive,” she grumbled. “What about the other kids?”

“Raven.” Anya's voice was firm and slightly intimidating. (Okay, a lot intimidating.)

“Okay, okay,” Raven said. “I won't.” She decided to change the subject and brought her fingertips up to trace along the tattoo that spanned Anya’s entire back, dark flame-like swirls surrounding unfamiliar script. She'd asked the girl about the ink after the first time they'd slept together, earning her the story of its meaning. The shapes down the center were from her biological mother’s native tongue, a dialect of Doteli specific to the small village where Anya's birth mother had been raised until she was six. The black flames represented rebirth and fearlessness, also a connection to her Nepali ancestry.

“I want a tattoo for my birthday this year,” Raven said softly. She'd be eighteen in September.

“Yeah?” Anya said, eyes closing at Raven’s touch. “Of what?”

“I don't know, yet,” Raven said. “Something that has meaning to me, of course. Maybe a quote. Here.” She trailed her fingers along Anya’s side, just above where her bra band would be if she were wearing one.

“The ribs? That's gonna hurt like a bitch.”

Raven snorted. “I got shot in my spine,” she said dryly. “I think I can take the pain.”

A noise from the kitchen pulled their focus.

“Mother dearest is home,” Raven muttered.

Anya opened her eyes and looked up at Raven, studying she carefully. “Are you ever sad you don't have a close relationship with your mom?”

Raven shrugged. “I mean, sure, I wish I had a mom like Clarke's or Octavia’s, but it is what it is. I can't change it so why dwell on it?”

That was probably the saddest thing Anya had ever had. She'd resisted Iris at first, after all she wasn't her ‘real’ mother, but it hadn't taken long to come to love her just as much as she would her biological mother. Iris was her mom, regardless of biology. She couldn't imagine growing up with only an absentee mother.

“Besides,” Raven continued after a moment. “Mama G is basically my second mom. In fact, she knows me better than my own mother. Like, way better. Did I ever tell you how I first met Abby?”

Anya shook her head and turned onto her side to face Raven.

“It was when I was shot,” Raven said. “They'd just moved here from Vegas about a month before. Wanted to get away from the city or something. Abby was covering an ER shift that night at the hospital. She's a cardio goddess, but she also knows a lot about trauma medicine and they all take turns in the ER. She was the one who saved me from being completely paralyzed for life. Also, fun fact, Clarke and I had become friends at school already and I had no idea it was her mom who was my doctor until Clarke came to visit me in the hospital.”

As Anya listened, she subconsciously brought her hand up and around Raven to trace along the puckered scar on her lower back. “What about your mom during your recovery?”

Raven shrugged. “Abby discovered how… indifferent she was then. She helped out a lot and got the hospital to keep me longer than they should have by fibbing about my temperature or saying she was concerned by my fluid output or something. She could have gotten into a lot of trouble for it, but she did it anyway. Then she let me stay with them for a few weeks until I could start to get around on my own and go back to school.”

Anya had already liked Abby, but she was finding a whole new appreciation for Clarke's mom.

“It wasn't long after that Clarke's dad died,” Raven said, sadness filling her voice.

Anya had heard the story of Jake’s sudden death, a victim of a hit and run by an impaired driver. She just hadn't realized how much his death must have also affected Raven. She sat up and pulled Raven up with her. “I know that your tattoo should say.”

Raven gave her a curious look. “What?”

“‘I don't choose pain; I choose life.’ You said that to me in Coronado, after I asked about your scar.”

“You remember what I said?”

Anya nodded. “I was only pretending to be aloof around you,” she said.

Raven looked smug. “I knew it!” Then she paused and thought about it. “I like it. The words.”

“That'll be my gift for you,” Anya said. “For your birthday. Maybe I'll get more ink as well.”

“Ohh, you should get one of those upper armband tatts, like Lincoln. That would be so sexy.”

Anya laughed and shook her head. “You're incorrigible,” she said just before she pressed her lips to Raven’s.

“You love it,” Raven said, bringing her hands up to cup Anya's cheeks. “Don't lie.”

Instead of speaking at all, Anya deepened the kiss. They were so wrapped up in one another that they didn't hear the approaching footsteps or the slurred yelling. They did, however, hear the crash of Raven’s bedroom door as it was pushed open and slammed against the dresser that was right beside the door.

They both jumped apart and pulled the sheets of Raven’s bedding up to cover themselves.

“Mom, what the fuck?!” Raven yelled.

“It's true, then,” Raven’s mother, Linda, spat out. Anya could tell she was three sheets to the wind. And maybe on something more. It was only noon. “My daughter is a dyke.”

Raven surprised Anya by her calm response. She just sighed and rolled her eyes. “Yes, mother, we've had this conversation before. You get drunk and spout homophobic bullshit, then you sober up and forget. Lather, rinse, repeat. Can you please leave now so I can finish what I started with my girlfriend?”

Linda swayed on her feet and blinked. Then her face turned into an expression of pure rage. “Get out!” Anya wasn't sure who she was talking to.

Raven gave Anya an apologetic look. “Can I crash at yours tonight?”

Still in a state of shock, Anya nodded. “Sure.” She’d been planning on staying with her parents and Lexa, but it looked like she was heading back to her apartment early. Raven was going to meet her new roommate, Harper. Yipee.

Then Raven, despite her nudity, tossed back the covers and hastily dressed, grabbed her backpack, and began stuffing clothes and other necessities inside. All the while, Linda stood watching, still swaying, but otherwise silent. Anya had had enough.

“Hey, can you kindly fuck off so I can get dressed?” She wasn't about to be polite to the woman who'd caused her girlfriend so much pain.

Linda was slow to react, but she turned her head to look at Anya, as if surprised she was still there. “I said get out!”

Sighing and not one to be shy, Anya followed Raven’s actions and just threw off the covers and pulled her clothes on. She forwent her bra in effort to save time, instead handing it to Raven and asking her to put it in her bag.

“Don't do anything stupid,” were Raven’s parting words to her mother. Anya just stared, suddenly realizing just how much she'd taken her parents, Iris in particular, for granted.

Her heart ached for Raven.

 

***

 

Later that evening, Clarke asked Lexa if she wanted her there when she talked to her parents about what happened. Lexa had shaken her head. “It's okay,” she said. “You have plans with your mom tonight and I'll have Anya there with me.”

Clarke did have plans with her mother, who she knew was really trying recently, so she agreed.

“Actually, you should bring her in on the loop,” Lexa suggested. “I mean, he did threaten you, too, so she'll probably have to get involved anyway.”

So that's how Clarke found herself sitting across from her mother in their favorite restaurant, checking her phone every two minutes to see if Lexa had messaged her.

Abby noticed and sighed, placing her fork on her plate. “Clarke, do I need to remind you about table manners?”

Clarke looked up, guilty. “Sorry,” she said. She placed her phone face down on the table. “It just… I'm worried about something.”

Abby raised her eyebrows. “Is this about you and Lexa by chance?”

“Kinda,” Clarke said. “Not our relationship.” She sighed and decided to follow Lexa's advice. She sat up straight in her booth and gave her mother a serious look. “Remember how I told you about why Lexa and her family moved her?”

“She was being bullied and harassed at her old school,” Abby replied. “And you didn't tell me this part, but I know she was attacked.”

Clarke gave her a confused look. “How do you know that?”

“Iris told me,” Abby replied. “When we had that chat about you two. She was explaining why she's so protective of her daughter. I don't know specifics, but I know enough.”

“Okay, so, last night, one of the kids that attacked her found her Facebook page and sent her a ton of horrific messages. Explicit, threatening messages.”

“That's terrible,” Abby said, worry clouding her thoughts. She'd come to think of Lexa as family.

Clarke nodded. “It's gets worse,” she said. “He, um, threatened me as well. Said he was going to show me what I was missing with a ‘real man,’ if you get what I mean. It was rather explicit.”

Abby did get what Clarke meant and she felt sick to her stomach. “We have to take this to the authorities,” she said.

“We have,” Clarke said. “Well, kind of. Lincoln’s aunt is helping us. She's a judge in DC and has some contacts who may be able to help. Mom, he also alluded to the attack and basically admitted his guilt.”

“So he could be held responsible? Charged?”

Clarke shrugged. “That's the hope,” she said. “Lexa is bringing her parents up to speed now, which is why I kept looking at my phone.”

Abby carefully considered her daughter. “I want to be kept in the loop,” she said. “Actually, I want to talk to Lincoln’s aunt myself.”

Clarke had already figured that. “We can set up another Skype meeting through Lincoln,” she said. “I'm sure Lexa's parents also want to talk to her. Maybe we can do it at the same time.”

Abby nodded. “That would be good. Clarke, I need to you promise me that you won't do anything reckless.”

Clarke knit her eyebrows. “Reckless? How could I?”

But Abby knew her daughter. “I don't want to hear that you've gotten on a plane and confronted this kid face to face.”

Clarke balked. She had considered doing just that. It was fleeting and she'd known it was a dumb idea, but it had crossed her mind. She shook her head. “I won't,” she said. “I'm not stupid. I know the best thing I can do is just be here for Lexa and offer my support.” She phone buzzed and she glanced at her mother, who nodded, then picked it up. “It's Lexa,” she said.

Abby studied Clarke as she read and replied to the text. She knew the teenager was growing up and there was nothing she could do to stop it, but she just wanted to keep her safe and sound forever.

“She said that her parents said the same thing you did,” Clarke informed her. “They want to talk to Judge Rivers before making any moves.”

“Let me know when they schedule a meeting and I'll make sure I'm there,” Abby said. “I'm working late shifts the rest of the month, so anything in the morning is good.” Clarke nodded and relayed the information to Lexa. “And Clarke?” She waited until her daughter looked up at her. “I want you to know just how proud I am of you. Your dad would be as well.”

Clarke swallowed against the lump in her throat and decided to use humor to stop herself from crying in public. “Will you still be proud of me if I decide to go to art school instead of med school?”

Without hesitation, Abby nodded. “Without a doubt. Is that what you want?”

Clarke sighed, not expecting this turn in the conversation and unprepared are it as well. “I don't know,” she said honestly. “I like both. I'm good at both.”

“You could find a school where both programs are strong and use your first year to try both and decide. UCLA has both top pre-med and fine arts programs. And it's close enough to visit home every once in a while.”

Clarke looked up, shocked. “UCLA?”

Abby nodded. “Yes. Why do you sound so shocked?”

Clarke gave a short laugh. “It's just, that's Lexa's top choice. She's shooting for a soccer scholarship there.”

“Huh, well what do you know?” she said. She'd honestly had no idea UCLA was on Lexa's radar. They hadn't discussed colleges yet.

“Wait, how do you know about their fine arts program?” Clarke asked.

Abby smiled. “I've been researching,” she said. “I just want you to be happy, and I don't think you should limit yourself by picking a school that favors one area of interest over the other.”

Clarke was shell shocked. Her mother had always pushed her towards pre-med, so much so that she'd started leaning towards art just because she was tired of hearing about it. So the fact that her mother had researched top fine arts programs… Now she was really at a loss.

“I have time to think about this,” Clarke said.

Abby nodded. “You do, but you should also consider retaking your ACT’s. I know you did fairly well in February and your score was in the acceptance rate for UCLA, but it's good to have a cushion.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. There was the mother she knew. “Already planned to, Mother,” she said. “Even though will be tough to beat. Raven got a 32, even. I know know of one person who scored higher than me with a 33.”

“Who?” Abby asked.

Clarke grinned. “Lexa.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well there you go. What a fucking bastard. But thank god for Lincoln's aunt! I will not be detailing the investigation super in-depth, but I will discuss it within chapters as it progresses. 
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: My daughter is in a volleyball tournament this weekend and it's making me want to write a Clexa fic where they are on rival volleyball teams (maybe college level?). Hmmm.


	21. I Choose to Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven meets Anya's new roommate, Clexa does the sexa, and Lexa gets some news about the case

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I fucking love y'all :') Seriously, over 50,000 hits, nearly 700 comments, 1,800+ kudos, and 200+ bookmarks? WOW! I am in shock. I seriously love each and every one of you <3 
> 
>  
> 
> DISCLAIMER: Yes, I know you can have STI’s without having had sex. You can be born with them, or even catch some varieties by touching any mucus membrane with an infected hand, etc. (NO, you cannot catch an STI from a toilet seat unless you are actually humping said toilet seat after someone else got bodily fluids like semen or blood, etc., on it). If you have unprotected sex, you should ALWAYS get tested first, both you and your partner, regardless of your sexual history. I was going to have Clarke and Lexa not be tested just because they’re teenagers and Nevada’s sex ed program is a fucking JOKE, but with Abby being a doctor, I figured Clarke would be more up on her sexual health knowledge than the average teenager, and Abby would have had her tested regardless. So, instead, let’s say Clarke was screened for STI’s during her gynecologist appointment (standard procedure anyway once you’re sexually active) and Lexa had been recently tested during her annual wellness visit because it was after they started having sex. So, both have been tested for STI’s and both are 100% clean. :) So, to wrap this up (get it? haha), GET TESTED!!

They’d been silent on the drive to Anya’s apartment after Raven’s mom had found them naked in bed and basically threw them out. Raven had assured Anya that she was fine and was used to it, but Anya saw past the girl’s tough as nails demeanor. She craved a closer relationship with her mother, and it was killing her that she didn’t seem to care about her at all. 

 

Anya wasn’t sure how to cheer her girlfriend up, but she figured food was a good place to start. She pulled into the parking lot of her favorite Chinese take away place just around the corner from her apartment and was pleased to see the smile form on Raven’s face. 

 

“I’m starving,” Raven said, confirming Anya’s suspicions that food would be a good place to start. 

 

They ordered enough food to feed a small village, partly to apologize to Anya’s new roommate who had thought she’d have the place to herself for the weekend, and partly just because Raven could eat  _ a lot _ , particularly when she was upset. 

 

Harper was the opposite of Ontari. Where Ontari was brash and rude, Harper was all smiles and polite greetings when introduced to Raven. 

 

“Oh! You’re the girlfriend,” Harper said. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” Raven asked, grinning at Anya. “Interesting.” 

 

“Shut up,” Anya murmured. 

 

“You love it,” Raven said, kissing her cheek. Then she turned to face Harper. “Sorry again about interrupting your quiet weekend. My mom is legitimately insane.” 

 

Harper shrugged. “Hey, you brought me food. I’m good.” She shoveled a heaping bite of kung pao chicken into her mouth with her chopsticks. 

 

Raven knew then and there that she liked Anya’s new roommate. But she decided to test her a bit more. “I hope you have good noise-cancelling headphones,” she said around an egg roll. “I get a bit loud during sex, but this one is a screamer.” She used the half-eaten egg roll to point at Anya. 

 

“Raven!” Anya scolded, eyes wide. 

 

Harper just let out a deep laugh. “No worries,” she said. “I’m a music major with a concentration in composing. I have a sick pair of Bose headphones. I’ll be fine. You two be as loud as you want.” 

 

Raven nodded. “Okay, you can stay. Babe, I like your roommate.” 

 

Anya shook her head. “I am so not putting out tonight,” she muttered. 

 

Raven just popped the rest of the egg roll into her mouth. “Sure,” she said. “We’ll see how long that lasts.” She threw Anya a suggestive smile and Anya knew then and there it wouldn’t last very long at all. She was such a sucker for this girl. 

 

Raven was right. It didn’t take long at all once they’d retired to Anya’s room at a quarter past ten. By ten-thirty, Anya was doing her best, and failing, to keep her moans quiet as Raven worked her magical tongue. 

 

Then Raven did that  _ thing _ and she lost it.

 

Later, when she had to venture out to the kitchen to get a drink of water, Harper was still on the couch, Bose headphones securely on her head as she watched Netflix on her laptop, bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream in her hands.

 

Anya ignored the knowing grin she gave her.

  
  
  
  


***

  
  
  


It was finally time. Clarke's period was finally over and they'd waited nine excruciating days after she’d taken her first non-placebo dose to be sure. Lexa's mom had finally consented to allowing her daughter to spend the night at Clarke's (no more than once a week). The timing was perfect because Abby was out of town for a consult for a former patient in San Francisco. 

 

They had the house to themselves. 

 

(“Just please keep your… activities in your room, Clarke,” Abby had said before leaving. She knew that Lexa would be staying overnight while she was gone. Clarke had been wide-eyed when she nodded her acknowledgement.)

 

It wasn't that they hadn't planned to actually have a nice evening and take things slow, starting with dinner and let things progress naturally along. 

 

But did things ever go according to plan when it came to them and sex? 

 

As soon as Lexa walked in the door to see Clarke dressed in a flowy summer dress with spaghetti straps and obviously braless, she lost it. She pressed the blonde against the entryway wall and kissed her with wild abandon. 

 

Clarke’s breath hitched in her throat and it took her several seconds to respond, but when she did, she did with fervor. 

 

“Upstairs,” Clarke said after only a few more seconds. 

 

“Okay,” Lexa said and grabbed her hand. 

 

Their plans of dinner first were all but forgotten. 

 

“I can't go slow,” Clarke said as they entered her room and locked the door (it was habit). 

 

“Me, neither,” Lexa said as she striped off her own shirt. 

 

“Thank god,” Clarke said. She was wearing a lot less clothing than Lexa (literally just the dress and her underwear), so as soon as she was naked, she dropped to her knees to help Lexa out of her athletic shorts (it was too hot for jeans, ugh) and boxers. Lexa kicked both garments aside and took hold of her erection. She wasn't sure she'd ever been this hard. 

 

Clarke licked her lips, suddenly wanting to draw Lexa's length into her mouth and use her tongue to make her come. But then she remembered their plan (well, the final part of their plan at least) and settled for a quick lick and tease with the tip of her tongue. 

 

Lexa gasped. 

 

Clarke rose to her feet and they pressed together, chest to knee, as they kissed. Hands roamed. Tongues battled. 

 

“Are you sure about this?” Lexa asked as they settled on Clarke's bed. “I have condoms in my bag if you're not.”

 

Clarke nodded and kissed Lexa. “I'm sure. I want to feel all of you.” She shifted and opened her legs as wide as was comfortable and pulled Lexa's hips towards hers. “Unless you're not okay with this?” 

 

Lexa dropped her hips so that the underside of her length pressed against Clarke's drenched sex. “I am so okay with this,” Lexa insisted as she moved her hips, causing her penis to slide along Clarke’s entire slit. 

 

Clarke gasped and surged forward with her hips, desperate to have Lexa inside her, barrier free. “So do it,” she demanded. 

 

Lexa briefly considered teasing Clarke, considered teasing her entrance and her clit with the tip of her penis, but then she realized that would be just as torturous for herself. Another time, she figured, when she wasn't so overcome with and overwhelming need to be encased by Clarke's silken heat with nothing between them. 

 

She shifted her hips just right and leaned down to kiss Clarke as she tested her readiness with her fingertips. She was more than ready given the effortless manner in which her fingers slid through her folds and sunk two inside inside her.

 

“Lexa,” Clarke gasped against her mouth. “Please.” She desperately needed Lexa to fuck her. 

 

Unable to hold back any longer, Lexa removed her fingers, continued kissing Clarke, and finally,  _ finally _ , began to push inside Clarke. She stilled with just the head inside, wondering how she was going to be able to hold off her orgasm until she was fully sheathed inside. Clarke felt incredible around her. 

 

“More,” Clarke demanded. She brought her heels up to rest on the top of Lexa's ass to urge her on. 

 

Lexa sank in fully, letting out a whimper that Clarke echoed as she buried herself inside. Nothing separating them. Fuck. 

 

“I didn't think it would really feel any different for me,” Clarke said, voice full of awe. “But it does.” She swallowed and wriggled her hips a bit. “It’s like… velvet. Or satin. Satin against satin.”

 

Lexa nodded into Clarke's neck. “It’s hotter,” she huffed out. She didn't mean hot as a synonym for sexy (though it was). She literally meant temperature. Clarke was so hot around her, and slick. And fucking perfect. 

 

“I want you to come inside me,” Clarke whispered into her ear as she wrapped her arms around her neck. “Fill me up. Claim me.” 

 

Lexa let out a low moan at Clarke's words. “Mine,” she growled. She began moving her hips. 

 

“Yours,” Clarke agreed, her own hips moving in time with Lexa's thrusts. 

 

They started slow, wanting to savor the moment, but they both quickly grew impatient and in desperate need of release. Lexa thrust hard, as deep as she could, as Clarke's hips bucked wildly. 

 

It didn't take long. Lexa would have been embarrassed at how quick it took her to feel the beginning of her orgasm, but Clarke was also making that sexy as fuck mewling sound that she made when she was close to coming, so Lexa didn't hold back. 

 

Clarke could tell Lexa was about to come. Inside her. The thought spurred the start of her own climax, so she opened her legs wider and angled her hips  _ just right  _ so that Lexa's lower abs could brush against her clit in order to push her over the proverbial edge. 

 

Then she felt it. Lexa tensed above her, her teeth sunk into her shoulder hard enough to leave a mark, and she let out a noise that would forever remain in Clarke's memory as the single sexiest sound she'd ever heard. Then she could feel her coming, inside her, spurt after spurt filling her up. Clarke’s orgasm overcame her with a rush at the feeling, at the thought. Her thighs gripping Lexa's hips harder than ever before as she cursed and tensed, her walls clenching around Lexa's shaft and milking her dry. 

 

“Fuck, Clarke,” Lexa gasped, still spasming as Clarke's walls gripped her like a vise. 

 

“I love you,” Clarke let out on a groan as the spasms slowed. 

 

“I love you, too,” Lexa murmured into her ear as she struggled to keep herself from crushing Clarke. She was fighting a losing battle, especially when Clarke tightened her arms and legs and pulled her closer. “I don't want to crush you,” Lexa panted out. 

 

“You won't,” Clarke insisted. Lexa gave in and settled her weight on top of Clarke as they recovered. This was new for them. Usually, Lexa was forced to move within a few minutes in order to dispose of the condom before she softened enough for it to leak. But now, now they could bask in the afterglow. 

 

Clarke hummed in complete content as she felt Lexa drape over her, still inside her. She could feel a bit of liquid seeping out of her where they were still joined, trailing down towards her mattress. She wasn't sure if it was her own slickness, Lexa’s cum, or a combination of the two, but she didn't care. She liked the feeling.

 

Soon, once Lexa had regained a bit of her strength, she rolled onto her side, taking Clarke with her, without dislodging herself. Clarke snuggled into Lexa's neck and hooked a leg over her hip to steady herself. Her hand came up to rest on Lexa's chest, just over her heart. She grinned when she get the rapid heartbeat beneath her fingertips. 

 

“That was incredible,” Clarke said, nuzzling close. “I love feeling you come inside me.”

 

Lexa hummed in pleasure as Clarke nibbled the space just below her ear. “ _ You're _ incredible,” she replied. “You felt amazing around me.” 

 

“We're doing that again,” Clarke said. “Tonight.”

 

“At least once more,” Lexa agreed. “Maybe twice.” 

 

Clarke grinned. “I knew I kept you around for a reason.” 

 

They fell into a contented silence, both of them fully content in their post-coital bliss. By then, Lexa had softened and had to pull out of Clarke, leaving them both feeling the loss. 

 

“Did I tell you that my mom wants me to go to UCLA?” Clarke said after a few moments. 

 

“She does?” 

 

Clarke nodded. “Yeah. She said she researched it and they have top pre-med and fine arts programs. Said I should start off taking classes for both and see which I like better.”

 

“Did she know I want to go there?” Lexa asked, suddenly feeling giddy at the thought of them attending the same school. 

 

“Nope,” Clarke said. “Not until I told her afterwards. She said it was fate or something. She loves you.”

 

“Even though she knows we're sleeping together?” 

 

Clarke laughed and pulled back just enough to look at her. “Are you still embarrassed around her?”

 

“Not embarrassed,” Lexa said. “Not really. Just uncertain? I don't know how to act.”

 

“The same way you did before,” Clarke said. “And you'll have the perfect opportunity to do so. We're going to hit the beach house again near the end of the month, once you're back from Seattle. Mom said you're invited. Just the three of us for a few days. I think she wants to get to know you even more. That means she loves you.” 

 

Lexa was quiet for a moment, then smiled. “Well, I'm glad I have her approval. It means I get to do this more.” She rolled onto her back, pulling Clarke on top of her. She gripped her hips and pressed her back until Clarke could feel that she'd gotten hard again.

 

“Oh,” Clarke gasped, feeling Lexa's erection nestled between her asscheeks. “Hello, there,” she said with a grin as she began to move, letting Lexa's length glide along the crevice. Lexa could feel Clarke against her pelvis, their mixed fluids leaving behind a delicious slickness.

 

Lexa cursed and bucked her hips upwards. “Fuck, Clarke,” she growled. 

 

“Okay.” Clarke took mercy on her (and herself) and lifted up enough to reach down and hold Lexa's erection as she slowly slid down, throwing her head back in pleasure as she began to ride her lover. She wasn’t sure she’d ever tire of having Lexa inside her.

 

Lexa decided this was her favorite view. Clarke on top her her, head thrown back and blonde tresses wild sex-tossled, and her breasts bouncing with her every move. God she loved those breasts. She reached up and cupped them both in her hands, earning a guttural moan from Clarke. She’d learned quickly that Clarke’s breasts were very sensitive, particularly her rosy pink nipples. She liked them played with, pinched, and sucked, sometimes gently, other times more aggressively, and Lexa was all too willing to comply. 

 

She pinched each nipple between her thumb and forefinger as Clarke’s movements became more frantic. 

 

“I want you to come inside me again,” Clarke said in a breathy, husky voice. Her sex voice, Lexa had come to know and crave the sound of. 

 

“You come first,” Lexa said, moving one hand down to rub Clarke’s clit as she continued her assault of her nipple with her other hand. She pinched a bit harder, knowing Clarke needed a more aggressive approach in that moment.

 

“Okay,” Clarke gasped out, pressing her hips down as hard as she could as she encouraged Lexa’s movements of her fingers on her clit. “Quicker,” she demanded of Lexa’s thumb on her clit.

 

Lexa loved that Clarke wasn’t afraid to say exactly what she wanted in bed. She complied and it wasn’t long before she felt Clarke’s inner walls squeezing her dick as the blonde came undone on top of her, spine stiffening as she cried out a stream of barely discernable obscenities. 

 

Clarke’s climax and the rippling of her walls around her erection prompted Lexa’s own, her cries echoing Lexa’s just seconds later as she spilled another load of cum into Clarke as the blonde collapsed on top of her, completely spent. 

 

This time, Lexa immediately rolled Clarke onto her back and pulled out, earning a whimper of protest from the blonde. 

 

“Wait, no, get back in there,” Clarke pouted. 

 

Lexa grinned and shook her head. “I wanna see you,” she said. 

 

Clarke immediately knew what Lexa meant and gave her a sly grin before shifting and opening her legs. She was glistening, her lips were puffy and the dark pink of post-orgasm that Lexa had come to know and love. Only this time, there was a milky white fluid added to the mix, trickling out of her opening and down the cleft of her ass. Lexa couldn’t resist running her fingers through the mess, earning a gasp from Clarke as she clamped her legs closed on Lexa’s hand.

 

“Too sensitive,” Clarke choked out and grabbed Lexa’s wrist. She sat up and gave her another grin as she looked at Lexa’s fingers covered in both of their releases. She brought those fingers to her mouth and licked them clean. 

 

“Fuck,” Lexa let out, completely mesmerized. “You’re so fucking sexy.” 

 

Clarke let go of Lexa’s fingers and hooked an arm around her neck, pulling her in for a kiss. Lexa didn’t even hesitate and let out a soft moan at the taste of both of them on Clarke’s tongue. The sudden image of herself going down on Clarke after she came inside her popped into her head and wouldn’t leave. 

 

Another time, she thought as Clarke pulled back and looked down at herself. “I need a shower,” she said, noting the mess of her inner thighs. “Join me?” 

 

Their shower took nearly an hour to complete. 

  
  
  
  


***

  
  
  
  


It took several weeks for Detective William Olson, Judge Evelyn Rivers’ contact in the Special Victims Unit, to be able to gather enough evidence to issue an indictment against Cody Landers and the others involved in the attack. But Cody had essentially admitted his guilt in the string of facebook messages. Then during questioning by Detective Olson, he’d inadvertently admitted that he’d been drunk and sent those messages to Lexa, formally tying him to the account. 

 

In other words, Cody Landers was going down. 

 

Of course, because the justice system is so backwards, the court date wasn’t until November. Evelyn had said they were lucky it wasn’t even longer. 

 

Also, because Cody was seventeen at the time of the attack, he was being charged as an adult. There was also a pending investigation as to why the case wasn’t initially investigated, and Lexa hoped something came of that as well. 

 

“I have to testify,” Lexa repeated as she spoke to Detective Olson via speaker on her cell phone. Clarke squeezed her hand in comfort. 

 

“You aren’t required to, no,” Detective Olson clarified. “But it will go a long way in getting a conviction. It’s your choice, of course, but I would recommend that you discuss it with the prosecuting attorney. You’ve talked to her, yes?”

 

Lexa nodded, then realized that the detective couldn’t see her. “Yes,” she said. “Indra. She seems… intense.”

 

The detective chuckled. “That she is. She’s also got the highest conviction rate in the district. She’s definitely who you want on your side.”

 

“I know,” Lexa said. “I’ll talk to her.” 

 

“And this is all if no deal is accepted,” the detective said. 

 

“Deal?” Lexa’s dad, Gustus, piped in. Normally a quiet man, Gustus made himself known when it came to his family. 

 

“The prosecution will present a deal to Cody’s lawyer in the coming weeks,” Detective Olson. “But only after getting your approval.”

 

“Nothing less than jail time,” Gustus growled. “No pansy community service hours or house arrest bullshit. He needs to serve time. A significant amount of time.” 

 

“I will relay the message, Mr. Woods,” the detective said, a bit of a chuckle in his voice. 

 

“See that you do,” Gustus said. 

 

Clarke definitely saw where Anya got her intimidating manner from. 

 

“And Clarke, they may ask you to testify as well. You are involved on the harassment charges, after all.” 

 

Oh fuck. “Me? Testify? About what?” 

 

“Just your knowledge of the messages and that he brought you into it. Even though he never messaged you directly, he still threatened you.” 

 

“I’ll do whatever it takes,” Clarke said, earning her looks of approval from Iris and Gustus. She was glad she was on Gustus’ good side, particularly since he’d found out they were having sex after Iris accidentally let it slip. That had been a fun conversation. (Not.) 

 

The phone call was wrapped up quickly and Lexa hung up her phone. She leaned against Clarke, emotionally drained. And to make things worse, the Woods family was leaving for Seattle the following morning for a week. She didn’t want to leave Clarke. She sighed and stood. “I need the bathroom,” she muttered, feeling sick to her stomach. 

 

“We really want to thank you, Clarke,” Iris said once Lexa had left the room. 

 

Clarke looked up. “What for?” she asked. 

 

“For being there for Lexa,” Gustus said.

 

“And helping her through all this,” Iris added. “Not many teenagers would be so willing to take on such a task.”

 

Clarke shrugged. It was hardly a task to her. “I’d do anything for her,” she simply replied. 

 

Iris smiled. “Exactly,” she said. She stood and rounded the table to sit next to Clarke, then hugged her. “You make my baby girl happy, and that’s worth a million thank yous.” 

 

Clarke laughed and hugged Iris back. “Well, you’re welcome, I guess? I just do it because I love her.” 

 

Iris nodded and pulled back, studying the girl that had brought back her Lexa. Something told her Clarke was going to be in their lives and a part of their family for a long, long time. And for that, she was grateful. 

 

Clarke saw her opportunity. “Hey, um, my mom and I are headed to the beach house in Coronado a couple days after you get back from Seattle. Would you consider letting Lexa go with us? My mom already said it’s okay, as long as it was okay with you. I think she wants to use the time to get to know Lexa even better.” 

 

Iris looked back at her husband and they seemed to have an entire conversation in a single look, something Clarke was already developing with Lexa. A moment passed, then Iris turned back to her. “Let me talk to your mother a bit before making a final decision, but I don’t see why not.” 

 

Clarke nodded, knowing her mom was always able to make Iris feel better about things like that. 

 

Iris cleared her throat and stood once more. “Now, why don’t you go find Lexa and make sure she’s okay,” she suggested. “I know she worries more than she lets on.”

 

She wasn’t wrong, so Clarke nodded and made her way down the long hallway towards Lexa’s room. She knocked softly, but when there was no answer, she slowly opened the door and peeked inside. She didn’t see Lexa inside, but noticed that her bathroom door was closed, so she entered the room and closed the door behind her. “Lex?” she called out. 

 

Then she heard heaving in the bathroom, followed by coughing and sputtering. Clarke rushed to bathroom door and opened it to find Lexa losing her breakfast in the toilet bowl. She quickly dropped to her knees beside her and held back her hair while she emptied her stomach, all the while rubbing her back and whispering reassurances that she was there. 

 

Finally, Lexa calmed and flushed the toilet before sitting back against the side of the tub, tears streaming down her face (partly due to the action of vomiting, which always made her cry because she hated it so much). Clarke grabbed a washcloth and wet it with cold water before rubbing it across Lexa’s forehead and cheeks. 

 

“Water?” she asked. 

 

Lexa nodded. “Please,” she whispered, sniffling. 

 

Clarke left the washcloth with her and went back out into Lexa’s bedroom, remembering the bottle of water she’d placed on the nightstand. She brought it to Lexa who rinsed out her mouth before taking several large gulps. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Lexa said. “Just the thought of having to testify, of having to see his face again, I--” she shook her head. “I don’t know if I can do it. All those people looking at me, knowing about me. Pitying me.” 

 

Clarke sat next to her on the floor, back to the tub as she pulled Lexa into her arms. “You don’t have to do anything,” Clarke said. “The detective said it would just help, but they already have a pretty strong case against him. And the others.” 

 

Lexa shook her head against Clarke’s chest. “No, I have to,” she said. “It’s the only way to ensure that justice is served.”

 

Clarke admired Lexa for her determination, but she also worried about her mental state. “I know, but you also have to also think about yourself,” she said softly. 

 

“I am,” Lexa said. “Justice is worth this. All of this. Without it, I keep thinking of what they did, of what they could do to someone else. I can’t let someone else get hurt because I was too much of a coward to testify.” 

 

And that was one of the many reasons Clarke loved this girl more than she’d ever be able to describe. She was so focused on making sure that this didn’t happen to anyone else that she was willing to sacrifice herself in the process. Heart of metaphorical gold. 

 

“I choose to fight.”

 

Clarke didn’t say anything in response, knowing that Lexa just needed to be held in that moment. So that’s what she did. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not going to drag the case out super long, but I will see it through to a final verdict (any guesses as to what that will be? lol). I actually don't anticipate very many more chapters of this thing. Maybe 3 - 5 more chapters with a final chapter that has a bit of a time jump to the November trial? Still unsure. I will, however, consider doing either a part 2 of them in college, or just write little one-shots of their relationship throughout the years. (In case you were wondering, yes, they stay together and yes they get married and yet they have kids of their own. Shocking, right?) Maybe those one-shots can be where I incorporate some of the more, ahem, mature smut requests I got in chapter 19. ;)
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: Went to Starbucks again yesterday and ordered my standard hot summer day order--grande nonfat double chocolatey chip frappuccino with no whip--for "Lexa" and got a cup that said "Clarke's bae." Pretty sure it was the same barista as last time. I must befriend this chick. Will keep you posted on further friendship goals developments.


	22. Longing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke is a moping mess while Lexa's family is in Seattle, so Abby drags her to the mall. Later, Clarke and Lexa have a fun FaceTime encounter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello! I'm alive. Apologies for the delay in updating. We've been packing up our house bectwe have to be out by the 31st and we still haven't found a place to live in Sacramento. Yikes! Also apologies for not replying to your lovely comments in the last chapter. I am a terrible person! (Just kidding. But I hate when I don't get a chance to interact! Lol)
> 
> Anywho, I hope you enjoy this chapter. It is a bit of filler since the next chapter is jam-packed with plot, fluff, and minor angst (not angsty angst. More like humor angst? Is that a thing? I'm making it a thing.)

Clarke was moping.

It had been four days since Lexa's family boarded a plane for Seattle, and yet she was moping.

Raven was still working at the summer camp and Octavia had ditched her. Okay, not really. But she was supposed to have Octavia back by the time Lexa had left to distract her. But then her parents just had to decide to extend their vacation.

Assholes.

So now she was moping.

“Clarke, when was the last time you showered?” Abby asked as she passed by her daughter’s room.

Clarke looked up from her bed where she was laying with her bare feet on the wall and her head hanging back over the edge of her mattress. “What?”

“Showered, Clarke,” Abby replied. “As in running hot water and soap?”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Hah hah, Mom,” she said. “I showered this morning. Even shaved my legs.” She lifted one leg in the air to show off the smooth skin left bare by her cotton shorts covered in flamingos.

“And then you put pajamas back on? It's two in the afternoon.”

Clarke sighed and sat up. “Nothing to do. All my friends abandoned me.” She put an overly dramatic tone in her voice and placed her hand on her forehead, palm out. “I am all alone in this dreary world.”

“Cute,” Abby deadpanned. “Get dressed and let's go to the mall. You said you wanted a new bathing suit for Coronado, right? We can get some Cinnabon.”

Clarke was always down for a Cinnabon center of the roll. She immediately dropped the dramatic act. “Okay.”

Being the middle of the afternoon on a weekday, the mall wasn't too bad. Abby made Clarke help her pick out an outfit for the hospital’s annual gala, which was just a fancy name for the mediocre semi-formal fundraising event that was in two days.

“Are you bringing a date?” Clarke asked carefully as she filtered through some dresses on the rack, not really paying attention.

Abby paused and looked up. “Would it bother you if I did?”

Clarke shrugged. “I mean, no. Yes. I don't know.” She gave a big sigh. “It's just weird is all.” She gave her mom a small smile.

Abby nodded. “I know,” she said. “I don't mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“Not uncomfortable,” Clarke assured. “Just…”

“Weird?” Abby said with a smile.

Clarke laughed and nodded. “Yeah. He's my teacher. It's going to be weird. I mean, what if my classmates find out and accuse him of going easy on me? What if he does go easy on me? I want to earn my grade.”

Abby laughed. “Oh, sweetie, trust me. If anything he's going to hold you to a higher standard. You'll have to work twice as hard as any of them for an A.”

Clarke scowled. “That's not any better,” she muttered. “I have a GPA to protect.”

Abby patted her back. “You'll be fine. Watch, by September it'll all feel like normal.”

Clarke didn't believe her but she didn't say that aloud. “Just, promise you'll never be overly PDA in front of me? I don't think I can handle that. And the locked door applies to you as well, you know.”

“Clarke!” Abby admonished.

“What? Do you want me to be scarred for life? No. Just, no. Now can we please change the subject before I get sick and have to miss out on the promised Cinnabon?”

Abby shook her head at her daughter's antics and chuckled. “Okay, have you thought about UCLA any?”

Clarke sighed. “No, mom, not really. It's summer. I don't want to think about school right now.”

“Fair enough,” Abby said. “You know, Brown is always an option. You have an in.” Abby was a Brown alumna who was also the class secretary for her graduating year.

“I'm not going to school all the way across the country,” Clarke replied.

“I thought you were looking into NYU?”

Clarke shrugged and looked through some more dresses. “Not anymore. I want to stay on the west coast.”

Abby selected a deep red dress and held it up for Clarke's approval. When she received a nod, she added it to the two others already draped over her arm to try on. “Does this decision have anything to do with Lexa?” she asked carefully.

Clarke looked up carefully. “No. Not really. I mean, kind of?” She sighed. “I'm not stupid enough to choose a school solely based upon my relationship,” she said. “But it doesn't mean that can't choose to be close. There are plenty of good schools on the west coast. In California.”

Abby accepted that answer, just glad that Clarke had opted against school on the other side of the county. Though, she would have been ecstatic if she'd chosen Brown. But that wasn't the point. “I want to try these on,” she said.

“Here,” Clarke said, adding one last dress to the pile. It was dark blue and fitted.

One by one dresses were nixed for some reason or another--one was way too short, another sat oddly on her waist, and a third was way too big in the bust. The last one to try on was the dark blue number Clarke had chosen.

“I think we have a winner,” Abby called out from the dressing room as she looked at herself in the mirror.

“Yeah?” Clarke asked, pushing the curtain aside to see. “Damn, Mom. I hope I inherited your metabolism and look that good at forty. That dress is perfect.”

Abby had to admit Clarke was right and ten minutes later, she was swiping her AmEx to purchase the dress.

“You want Cinnabon now or after we find you a suit?”

Clarke gave her mom an incredulous look. “Are you kidding? After. Always eat after you find the perfect bikini.”

Abby sighed. She knew Clarke's desire for a new suit was to drive her girlfriend crazy. It felt wrong to be a part of this. “Okay, here's the deal. I'm going to go wander around while you find something appropriate to wear at the beach. Which is only semi-private and where your mother will also be present. Got it?”

Clarke's eyes widened as she nodded, knowing instantly that her mother had caught onto her plan to seduce Lexa. She'd totally forgotten that her mom would also be there. Whoops?

Even so, she wanted a new suit.

“Got it,” Clarke said. Abby handed her the credit card and told her a spending limit, then headed towards the Yankee Candle store.

Nearly an hour later, Clarke was more than happy with her purchase and texted her mom to meet her at the Cinnabon. After receiving their cinnamony goodness, they found an empty bench to sit on as they ate and talked about various topics. Clarke finally decided to ask something that had been on her mind since Lexa's mom had called her mother and decided that Lexa could go with them to Coronado.

“So, when we go to the beach house, are Lexa and I expected to sleep in separate rooms or can we share?” She looked at her mom expectantly, proud of herself for not stumbling over her words and sounding confident.

Abby paused with a forkful of cinnamon roll halfway to her mouth, then lowered it. “Clarke, I think we're at the point where it would be ridiculous to make you two sleep separately. Don't you think?”

Clarke grinned sheepishly. “Yeah?”

Abby took the bite of cinnamon roll and chewed. She swallowed before continuing. “I've accepted that you're not a child anymore, as much as it just makes me feel old. You'll be eighteen soon, then off to college. You've never been in any serious trouble and your grades are near perfect. I don't have a reason not to trust you.”

Clarke couldn't help but smile as they continued to eat and talk. It was like she had her old mom back. She wasn't sure what did it--her stepping down as head of cardio or her new relationship--but either way, Clarke was happy.

“I missed this,” Clarke said as they drove home. “Hanging out like this.”

Abby smiled and looked over at her daughter. “Me, too, kid. I'm sorry I let myself get so drowned by work. I don't know how that happened.”

“It was your way of grieving,” Clarke said. “Just how mine was to pour myself into my art.”

Abby nodded. “Well, whatever it was, I'm glad it's behind us.”

“Me, too.”

Later, Clarke smiled when she finally received a text message from Lexa.

LEXA (9:11PM):  
>> I’m alive!! (Barely) Also, I missed you *blue heart emoji*

Clarke chuckled, knowing that her girlfriend and her family had embarked on a day-long hiking trip where there was no reception.

CLARKE (9:12PM):  
>> Awe I missed you too! How was the hike?

LEXA (9:13PM):  
>> It was fun, but exhausting. We saw bears!!

A picture came through with the message of Lexa taking a selfie with a pair of black bears in the distance behind her. There was was a large enough chasm between her and the bears to eliminate any danger.

Clarke laughed at her girlfriend’s OMG face.

CLARKE (9:15PM):  
>> Staaaahp you're so freakin cute. *heart eyes emoji*

LEXA (9:16PM):  
>> Whatever. What did you do today?

CLARKE (9:18PM):  
>> Went to the mall with my mom and got a new bikini ;)

LEXA (9:20PM):  
>> Oh?? Show me ;)

CLARKE (9:21PM):  
>> Aren't you with your family, you perv? :p

LEXA (9:23PM):  
>> Nope. Aden is spending the night at our grandparents’, Anya went to the movies with our cousin, and everyone else went to my uncle’s for a CAH tournament that'll last hours. I said I had a headache so I'm in our suite alllllll alone *winking face emoji*

Clarke grinned.

CLARKE (9:25PM):  
>> Oh yeah? I'm all alone too. Mom’s on a date *eye roll emoji*

LEXA (9:26PM):  
>> Sooooo… show me your new bikini *winking face emoji*

Clarke jumped off her bed and quickly stripped off her clothes and wiggled into the bottoms, then tied up the top, glad she'd had the foresight to throw them in the washer as soon as they'd gotten home. She looked at herself in the mirror and decided that she looked damn good in this suit. The cut of the bottoms made her ass look really good and the top pushed her boobs together to create a generous cleavage that she knew Lexa would not be able to resist.

She pulled the ponytail holder out of her hair and shook her head, letting her wavy hair fall naturally around her shoulders. She went into her bathroom and took a mirror selfie while leaning forward slightly against the countertop, further accentuating her cleavage. She reviewed the photo and grinned. Perfect. She sent it to Lexa along with a winking emoji.

She didn't have to wait long for a reply.

LEXA (9:33PM):  
>> FUCKING HELL MY GIRLFRIEND IS A FREAKING SEX GODDESS

Clarke laughed aloud. Sex goddess, eh? She could live with that. Before she could type a reply, Lexa was calling her over FaceTime. Clarke accepted the call and her beautiful girlfriend’s face appeared on her phone.

“Hey gorgeous,” she greeted.

“Um, I think we just established that you are the gorgeous one,” Lexa replied with a grin.

Clarke walked back into her bedroom and propped her phone up on her dresser. “You called just in time. I gotta change.” She winked at the phone before untying the string around her neck that held the bikini top together, then the one in back. She tossed the fabric onto her bed, forgotten.

“No fair,” Lexa groaned, eyes attached to her own screen. “I can't touch you.” She pouted.

Clarke grinned and pushed down the bottoms so that she was completely and unabashedly naked. An idea popped into her head. “No, but I can,” she said.

“You can what?” Lexa asked.

“Touch me,” Clarke replied. She grabbed her phone and crawled onto her bed, propping her back against the pillows on the headboard.

“Fuck,” Lexa groaned. “Clarke.”

“Lexa.” She brought a hand up to tease her own nipple.

“What are you doing?”

Clarke grinned and moved her phone back to show what her hand was doing.

“That's so fucking hot,” Lexa said.

“Are you hard?” Clarke asked.

Lexa nodded.

“Take off your clothes.”

Lexa didn't have to be told twice. She propped her iPad on the hotel nightstand and, after ensuring that the door to the room she was sharing with Anya in their suite was locked, she tugged off her sleep shirt and boxers.

Clarke gulped. She was hard.

Lexa settled back on the bed, positioning herself so that Clarke could see her.

“Wrap your hand around yourself,” Clarke instructed. “Imagine it's my hand. Or my mouth. You like my mouth wrapped around you, don't you?”

Lexa did as Clarke said and nodded. “Yes,” she hissed. She looked directly at her screen and poured when she couldn't see what Clarke was doing. “I want to see you, too,” she said as she slowly stroked herself. “Where's your hand now?”

Clarke chuckled and directed her phone to show her hand between her legs, slowly stroking her drenched folds.

“Are you wet?” Lexa asked.

“Drenched.”

“Show me.”

Clarke managed to hold her phone at a decent angle in her right hand as the fingers of her left hand dipped between her folds, pressing inside before she removed them to show Lexa the viscous liquid that coated them.

“I wish I could taste you right now,” Lexa sighed, her hand tightening a bit. She also wished she had some lotion or something. Friction was not sexy. Spit would have to do.

“Fuck I wish that too,” Clarke groaned. “What would you do if you were here?”

“First I’d play with your tits,” Lexa said. “Pinch your nipples until they were hard, then use my lips and tongue to tease them.” She watched Clarke's hands and figures mimic the actions. “I would use my teeth, lightly, like I know you love.”

“Hmm, yes I do,” Clarke said.

“I'd use my tongue to tease your entrance until you begged me for more,” Lexa said, voice husky with arousal.

“Fuck, yes, more, please,” Clarke said as she pretended that her fingers was Lexa's tongue.

“Then I'd circle your clit, slowly at first, while sliding two fingers inside you,” Lexa continued.

“Mmm, yeah?” Clarke gasped as she slid her middle and ring fingers in and used her thumb to simulate Lexa's tongue. She watched intently as Lexa's hand moved over her shaft. “Then what?”

“Then I'd do that thing that you like where I flutter my tongue across your clit until you were on the brink of coming.”

Clarke did just that, more than ready for her orgasm to overtake her.

“But then I'd back off,” Lexa said. “Move to kiss your inner thighs instead.

Clarke groaned at the loss of contact with her clit. “Fuck, you're so mean,” she whined.

Lexa chuckled and Clarke glared. “Patience, babe. Since I can't be there in person, I want to savor this moment. I'm not sure we'll get another before we head home.”

“I can't wait for you to be here,” Clarke said. “I can't wait to take you with my mouth, then let you cum on my tits. Then let you cum again inside me. I love when you cum inside me.”

Lexa panted at Clarke's words. Her girlfriend was a freaking pro at dirty talk. But it made her determined to match Clarke’s abilities. “I can't wait to fuck you from behind again,” she said, imagining the scene in her mind.

“Hmm, yes,” Clarke said, remembering that one time. Why had they not done it again? “Lexa, please let me touch myself again,” she begged.

Lexa chuckled. That's what she'd been waiting for. “Okay. Do it. Come for me, baby.”

She watched Clarke's face on the screen as the girl attacked her clit and reached her orgasm on a long, low whine. Her face was contorted in pure ecstasy, but she kept her eyes open, staring at the screen into Lexa's eyes. Maybe that's what drove Lexa to her own orgasm. The intensity of Clarke's gaze. Or maybe it was the way she bit her lip so hard Lexa was surprised that she didn't draw blood.

Or maybe, just maybe, it was simply Clarke. (It was.)

Lexa never let her own gaze leave Clarke's as she felt her balls tighten, then wave after wave of euphoria travel through her as she shot her load on her stomach (she was very careful to not let it get on the hotel bedspread because gross).

“Well that was new,” Clarke finally said once she'd regained her composure.

“That was fucking hot,” Lexa said.

Clarke nodded. “You look fucking hot like that, your own cum on your sexy abs.”

Lexa glanced down and grinned as she ran her finger through the mess.

“If I were there, I'd lick it off you.”

Lexa groaned. “Fuck, Clarke. You're gonna make me hard again.”

“And that's a bad thing?” Clarke teased.

“Only because I'm not certain when Anya will be back and we're sharing a room,” Lexa explained.

Clarke pouted. “But I'm still horny,” she whined playfully. “It was hot but not as satisfying as the real thing. I'm gonna need at least two more orgasm to match one that you give me in person.”

Lexa sighed. “I know what you mean,” she said honestly. Because she fully agreed. As sexy as it was watching Clarke touch herself to oblivion, she much preferred when she got to touch the girl herself. And she definitely preferred Clarke's hands, Clarke's mouth, Clarke's pussy, Clarke's everything over her own hand. “But I'm on borrowed time already and I need another shower.”

Clarke sighed. “It's okay. We'll just have to make up for it at the beach house. My mom said we don't have to sleep in separate rooms.”

“Won't it be weird fucking with your mom right downstairs though?” Lexa asked, sitting up and grabbing a tissue off the nightstand to wipe her stomach.

Clarke shrugged. “Better than not fucking at all.”

Lexa hummed in agreement.

“I'll let you go now,” Clarke said. “Text me after your shower?”

Lexa nodded. “I will. I love you.”

“Love you, too, baby.”

The call was disconnected and Lexa couldn't stop grinning. She loved when Clarke called her baby.

She showered quickly, her hair having already been washed by her first shower of the evening, and dried off. She'd just redressed in her pajamas and grabbed her phone when there was a knock on the door.

“Hey, asshole, you locked me out!”

It was Anya. Lexa unlocked the door and opened it with a sheepish grin. “Sorry,” she muttered.

Anya rolled her eyes. She wasn't dumb. She'd known exactly what her sister had been up to. “I expect repayment tomorrow night,” she said casually.

“Huh?” Lexa asked, sitting on her bed.

“You're going to make yourself scarce tomorrow night. I have a date with Raven.”

Understanding dawned on Lexa and she made a disgusted face.

“Don't give me that look,” Anya scolded as she dropped onto her own bed. “Like you weren't sexting Princess Griffin.”

“We weren't sexting,” Lexa said honestly.

“Oh, Skype sex. Nice. Didn't know you had it in you, lil sis.”

Lexa ignored her and unlocked her phone instead, seeing that she had a message from Clarke. It was a video message. Without thinking (because she was honesty flustered from Anya’s comments) she pressed play. What she didn't realize was that her sound was all the way up and when the video started, a buzzing sound rang out loud and clear. At first, the image was dark and unfocused. Lexa was confused for a moment until the picture cleared and she could make out exactly what was on the screen--

HOLY SHIT.

Lexa rushed to pause the video, but dropped her phone on the floor in the process and it slid between the bed and nightstand. Fuck fuck fuck.

She lunged off the bed and fished the phone out of the narrow space, but not before Clarke’s moans filled the room in addition to the buzzing. Clarke was using a freaking vibrator!

She finally managed to stop the video and slowly looked up, cheeks on fire, to look at Anya. Maybe she hadn't heard it or didn't know what it was.

No such luck.

Anya was sitting there, hand over her mouth as she struggled not to laugh, eyes comically wide.

“So that happened,” was all Lexa could think to say.

“I officially know way too much about your girlfriend,” Anya said. “And now it’s the remaining three nights we're here that you're making yourself scarce.”

“Yeah, well, your girlfriend described in great detail how she used a strap-on on you last week, so there.” Oh. That wasn't at all lame.

Anya quirked a single eyebrow. “I would say at least my girlfriend didn't send me a raunchy video but I come out the loser in that argument.” She looked pensive. “Can you fuck off for like half an hour?”

Lexa puffed her chest out a bit. “No. You get the next three nights. You'll have to wait.”

“Fine,” Anya said, elongating the word. “But tell Princess Griffin that her special little friend is loud as fuck and I can recommend a quieter one.”

Lexa threw a pillow at her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lexa cannot catch a break with the embarrassing situations!! XD You *know* Clarke will just laugh it off and only be apologetic because she knows Lexa was embarrassed in front of Anya. But she herself has no shame. 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: as we were packing, my wife found our old collection of sex toys that we'd forgotten about because ~life~. It's been a fun last few days.......... ;)


	23. Not So Perfect Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa returns from Seattle to an unpleasant surprise... cue comforting Lexa.

The day Lexa returned from Seattle, Clarke was sick.

Not like a few sniffles and a bit of a sore throat sick. More like puking her guts up every few minutes sick. It felt like a red-hot knife was slicing through her abdomen every time she took a breath.

“It feels like it did when my appendix needed to come out,” Clarke explained to her mom as she sat on the bathroom floor hugging her legs to her chest as she concentrated hard on not vomiting. “Except it's moving around.”

Abby felt Clarke's forehead. She felt a bit warm, but not concerningly so. “I think that Thai food is coming back to haunt you. I told you it looked sketchy.”

Clarke glared up at her mother.

Abby sighed. “Sorry,” she said. “I'm pretty sure it's food poisoning, but not severe enough to need the ER yet. I'm not on call today, so I'm going to run to the store for some Gatorade and laxatives. The quicker you get it out of your system, the better.”

Clarke groaned at the implication and felt her stomach gurgle again. “I was supposed to meet Lexa when she got home in a few hours.” The plane had only taken off from Seattle half an hour prior to her stomach rejecting the food. That goddamn delicious Thai food.

“I don't think you're going anywhere today, sweetie,” Abby said. “Are you good to move to your bed?”

Clarke thought, then shook her head. “No. I need to stay here awhile. Can you bring me my phone, though?”

Abby retrieved the device and then left to make a trip to the store with instructions for Clarke to call her if it got any worse. As soon as she left, Clarke opened her message thread with Lexa and sent the green sick emoji. Then another message explaining that she had food poisoning and felt like she was dying. She knew the girl wouldn't get the messages until her plane landed in about an hour, but Clarke wasn't sure she'd make it another hour.

Oh god. This was the end for her.

She hurled again and vowed to never, ever eat Thai from a food truck again.

About an hour later, Lexa was fishing her phone out of her carry on to turn on, wanting to message Clarke that they'd landed safely and were taxiing to the terminal. She couldn't wait to see her girlfriend. It had only been a week, and they'd texted and talked on the phone or FaceTime every single day, but she missed being in the same room with her. It wasn't just the sex (though she did miss that). It was more than that. It was the simple touches and the just being with her.

Gah, she had it so bad.

“Oh no,” Lexa let out as she read her text messages.

“What?” Anya asked from the seat next to her. Their parents and Aden were a few rows ahead.

“Clarke is sick,” she said, showing Anya the phone. “Says it's food poisoning.”

Anya looked skeptical. “She's probably lying,” she said.

Lexa bristled. “Excuse me?”

Anya grinned. “She's probably trying to trick you. Surprise you. Says she's so sick that she feels like dying so that you go to her house to take care of you and BAM! Welcome home party.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “Not likely,” she said. But was it? The timing was weird…

She texted Clarke back, asking if she wanted her to come over. Soon, they were at the gate and deplaning. They were at baggage claim before Lexa's phone buzzed. But it wasn't Clarke.

ABBY (3:37PM):  
>> Hi Lexa. I saw that you texted Clarke, and she's finally managed to fall asleep. I didn't want to wake her, but I think she'd like it if you came by if you get a chance. Glad you are home. -Abby

Lexa grinned at how Abby had to sign her name. She sighed and replied back to Abby that she'd be there as soon as they made it home, then pocketed her phone.

“Party,” Anya muttered into her ear.

“Her mom texted me that she's sick,” Lexa pointed out.

Anya scoffed. “And? Abby's like the coolest mom out there. She'd totally lie to help Clarke surprise you.”

She wasn't wrong.

Just in case, Lexa made sure to grab one of her hoodies in addition to the gifts she'd gotten Clarke while in Seattle. The hoodie was for Clarke to snuggle with and would be the second one of hers that Clarke would take possession of. She'd complained the other night that the first one she managed to steal no longer smelled like Lexa. This one would hopefully help her feel better. If she was actually sick. Goddammit, Anya.

She honestly wasn't sure which she expected more: sick Clarke or a surprise party. She was hoping for the latter, even though she hated surprise parties, since the other option would mean that Clarke was actually sick.

Unfortunately, there was no party.

Abby greeted her when she knocked on the door, quickly ushering her inside. “She's still sleeping,” Abby said. “I checked on her a few minutes ago.”

Lexa frowned. “So she really is sick? No surprise welcome home party?”

Abby gave her a confused look. “Party?”

Lexa shook her head. “Sorry. Anya figured Clarke was just saying she was sick to throw me off. I was hoping it was true so Clarke wasn't really sick.”

Abby gave her a soft smile. “Unfortunately, there's no party. But go on up. I'll bring up some Gatorade for her shortly to replenish her fluids and electrolytes.”

Lexa thanked her and went up to Clarke's room. She knocked softly on the door and when she got no answer, she peeked inside. Clarke was still asleep, facing away from the wall and in the fetal position. That told Lexa that she was really in pain. She hated sleeping on her side. She was strictly a stomach or back sleeper. A small trash can slash puke bucket sat on her nightstand within reach.

Lexa hated to wake her and knew she was a pretty heavy sleeper, so she simply toed off her shoes and crawled behind the girl, spooning her gently.

Clarke didn't stir.

Lexa pressed a kiss to her shoulder and felt the exhaustion of travel hit her. She figured it wouldn't hurt to sleep a while. She was a lighter sleeper than Clarke and would awaken if the other girl moved.

She was out within minutes, curled around Clarke.

A short time later, Lexa was awoken by groans of discomfort and a shivering Clarke. She immediately sat up and placed a comforting hand on Clarke's arm, taking note that she was now awake and clutching her side.

“Clarke, I'm here,” she said softly, pushing hair out of Clarke's face.

The blonde didn't have a chance to respond. She bolted up and barely managed to grab the puke bucket before retching into it. She'd emptied most of the contents of her stomach long ago, so all that came up was that nasty acidic liquid. Bile.

Lexa nearly gagged at the smell, but managed to keep herself from doing so, her desire to help and comfort Clarke far overcoming her desire to flee (she really hated the sound of someone throwing up). It was the least she could do after Clarke had taken such good care of her the other week.

She pulled Clarke's hair back and secured it in a ponytail with the elastic she kept around her wrist and then rubbed her back in what she hoped was a soothing motion. It had helped her when she'd gotten sick at the thought of testifying.

Abby found them like that when she came up to being Clarke something to drink and some saltine crackers (as well as a water for Lexa). She gave Clarke a concerned look, knowing she had to have completely emptied her stomach hours ago. Her eyes met Lexa's.

“Had she been up long?” she asked.

Lexa shook her head. “Couple minutes. Immediately threw up.”

Abby nodded and made a decision. “Okay. Clarke, sweetie, I'm going to take you in to the clinic so we can get you on an IV. You're dehydrated now and I don't have the supplies to set up an IV here.”

Clarke didn't answer. Instead she retched some more.

Abby looked up st Lexa. “I hate to ask, but can you help me with her?”

Lexa smiled. “Of course,” she said. “I'm not leaving her side until she's better.”

Abby would have expected nothing less. “I'm going to call ahead so they can have everything ready when we get there. Perks of being a hotshot surgeon at the hospital.”

Clarke's stomach calmed down as Abby made the call and she was able to make it to the car relatively unassisted (after gargling some mouthwash and eagerly tugging on Lexa's hoodie despite the fact that it was over a hundred degrees outside). By the time they made it to the clinic at Abby’s hospital, the nurses had set up an IV of fluids and had some anti-nausea medicine ready for her to take. Someone Clarke recognized but was too out of it to put a name to the face came by and gave her a full exam just to be sure that it was only food poisoning. (It was--cultures came back positive for campylobacter bacteria and would leave her system hopefully within a few days.) They gave her antibiotics to try and help the process of healing, but really all they could do was keep her hydrated and encourage her to rest.

She did, however, notice that Lexa stayed with her the entire time. Because Abby was a well respected surgeon, she was admitted ‘just to be safe’ and placed in a private room. Also, Lexa was allowed to stay past visiting hours. Perks of being a hotshot surgeon, indeed.

When Clarke was awake, she protested all the fuss, stating that she was fine to go home, but Abby was having none of it.

It nearing ten at night when Lexa awoke from an unintentional nap. She blinked and realized that she'd accidentally fell asleep in the chair by Clarke's bedside. Ow. That's why she was so stiff. She stood and stretched, several of her joints popping and she groaned softly in relief. Then her stomach growled. She hadn't eaten since the airport in Seattle and that was nearly ten hours ago. She somehow doubted the hospital cafeteria was open this late.

She was just debating whether she should text Anya to bring her something when the door opened and Abby walked in, dressed in the requisite wine color of attending surgeons.(Residents wore the same light blue as they did on Grey’s Anatomy, which always made Clarke annoyed that attendings didn't wear navy blue.) You're awake,” she said.

Lexa nodded around a yawn. “Yeah. I didn't mean to fall asleep.”

“Flying always makes me tired,” Abby replied. She walked to a sleeping Clarke's side and felt her forehead for signs of fever. None. Good. “I came in earlier to ask if you were hungry but you were sleeping.”

Lexa groaned inwardly. She'd missed out on food. Dammit.

“I got you something anyway and put it in the fridge in my office. Do you want it?”

“You are a freaking saint,” Lexa said enthusiastically. She didn't even care what Abby had gotten her.

“Come on,” Abby said. “She probably won't be awake until morning and I don't want the smell of food to make her sick again.”

Lexa nodded in agreement and leaned down to place a gentle kiss on Clarke's forehead before following Abby out into the hallway. Turns out Abby had gone for simple with a McDonalds double cheeseburger and fries. Microwaved McDonalds was pretty disgusting but she was so hungry that it didn't matter to her. She scarfed down the food anyway.

“I feel like a cardio surgeon shouldn't be feeding meMcDonalds,” Lexa said as she swallowed her mouthful of fries. Mmmm. Fries.

Abby laughed. “You can eat anything in moderation,” she said. “I had the same thing.”

Lexa nodded. “Thank you, though. I didn't even think about dinner earlier with everything.”

Abby grabbed two waters from her fridge and sat at the table across from Lexa. She slid one bottle to the girl and opened the other for herself. “It's the least I could do for your assistance,” she said. “Not a lot of people would be willing to deal with a vomiting person like that.”

Lexa shrugged. “Honestly if it were anyone else I'd have bailed. But Clarke isn't just anyone.” She took a bite of the burger.

“You love her.”

Lexa paused in her chewing, looking up. She just realized that this was the first time she'd been alone with Abby since she and Clarke started dating. Actually, she wasn't sure she'd ever really been alone alone with the doctor. Which meant it was their first real encounter since she'd found out they were having sex as well. Crap. She swallowed. “I really do,” she said. “And I would do anything for her.”

Abby nodded. “I know,” she said. Then she got quiet and had a pensive look on her face. Lexa just waited, unable to eat anymore for the moment. Finally, Abby sighed and looked Lexa squarely in the eye. “Promise me you'll always be there for her like you were today.”

Lexa blinked. She wasn't quite sure what she'd been expecting but that wasn't quite it. She nodded. “I promise.”

Seemingly satisfied, Abby nodded again. “Good. We'll probably have to postpone our trip to Coronado for a few days. I don't think Clarke will be up for it yet.”

Lexa chuckled. They'd planned to leave the following day. “No I don't think so.” She finished eating as they made small talk. Lexa was glad it was easy conversation and not at all awkward. It was almost like they were family.

Clarke was discharged the following morning, still experiencing some abdominal cramping, but no more nausea. Thank god.

Seriously. No more Thai food trucks.

Abby and Lexa helped her upstairs as soon as they got home.

“I need a shower,” Clarke murmured as she sat on the edge of her bed. “I feel gross. But I'm also kind of hungry? I think? I can't tell.” Food both made her salivate and feel sick.

Abby chuckled. “You will for a while,” she said. “A shower will help, though. And I'll heat up some of the soup that Marcus brought over for you from that place you like.” She turned to look at Lexa. “You got this?”

Lexa nodded and Abby left to get the soup ready.

“Up,” Lexa said as she pulled Clarke's shirt up.

Clarke lifted her arms obediently. “I'm not too weak to undress myself, Lex,” she said and even cracked a bit of a smile. That was good. “I can cleanse myself, too.”

“Shhh,” Lexa said as she tossed the shirt into the hamper. “Let me take care of you.”

Clarke wasn't really going to say no to that, so the next thing she knew they were both standing naked under the warm water flowing from the shower head as Lexa used a washcloth to make sure Clarke was squeaky clean. The shower wasn't sexual in any way (Clarke was so not up for sex). But it was no less intimate as Lexa took care of Clarke. She helped her wash her hair, then dry off and dress in clean clothing. Then she brushed out her wet hair and braided it in two French braids so it would stay out of her face.

By the time she was done, Abby had brought up a tray with two bowls of soup, some saltine crackers, and a sandwich for Lexa, though Clarke did have a few bites of it.

“Thank you for everything,” Clarke said when they'd finished and Lexa had set the tray aside.

“You don't have to thank me for anything,” Lexa said, curling against Clarke as they lay in her bed under the covers. It was barely noon but they were both exhausted.

“I do, though,” Clarke said. “You're amazing.” She pressed a soft kiss to Lexa's lips. “I'm sorry our plans got messed up.” She poured a bit. She'd been looking forward to getting reacquainted with her girlfriend the previous night.

“Don’t even worry about it,” Lexa said. “We have all of next week. You just focus on regaining your strength.”

Clarke grinned even as her eyes closed. “Why? You gonna do dirty, dirty things to me?”

“You know it.”

They both drifted off to sleep then, grins on their faces.

 

***

 

“I bought her that vibrator, thank you very much. I have the same one.”

Anya smirked. “How come I’ve never seen this vibrator of yours?”

Raven scoffed. “Are you implying that my dexterous fingers and nimble tongue aren’t enough for you, Woods?”

Anya shrugged. “Spice of life,” she teased. They lay on the couch in Anya’s apartment, not wanting to chance another scene with Raven’s mother like the last time. Anya was behind Raven, spooning her as they watched Netflix.

“I resent that,” Raven muttered.

Anya just placed a kiss on her bare shoulder and ran her hand from her hip around to rest just below her breast that was covered in only a thin tank top. She’d foregone the bra after their last round of ‘I really fucking missed you’ sex. It was a really good thing that Harper had summer classes all afternoon because they hadn’t held back. Like, at all.

“Hey, has there been anything new from D.C.?” Raven asked after a few moments.

“Nothing more than I told you on FaceTime a few days ago,” she said. “They said that since Lexa is a minor, she can testify via video feed if that makes her more comfortable. Clarke, too.”

“Is she going to do that?”

Anya shrugged. “She’s not sure. I think she feels like she needs to face him to face her fears. I don’t understand, but I support whatever she decides.”

Raven nodded. “If she goes to D.C., I wish I could go with,” she said. “For moral support for both Lexa and Clarke. Clarke hates public speaking in general, so I’m sure she’d freak out at having to testify in front of a jury.”

Anya hummed. “I’m sure we could work it out for you to come with,” she said.

Raven snorted. “You think I can afford plane fare? Cute.”

Anya pinched her side, causing Raven to yelp and squirm. “I meant I could pay for it, dummy,” she said. “Or my parents. Hell, I bet even Abby would pay for you without question.

Raven glared back at her. “I can’t let you do that,” she said. “Or anyone else.” Though, she was right that Abby would probably not even think twice about it, just like the time she’d paid for not only her plane ticket, but her entire trip to Disney World for Clarke’s sixteenth birthday.

Anya tightened her arm around Raven’s waist, pulling her close. “Hey, if I have to travel back to D.C., there’s no way you’re not coming with, one way or another. You can work it off somehow.”

“In sexual favors?” Raven suggested with a laugh.

“Isn’t that technically prostitution?”

“Shh, don’t ruin it with logic.”

 

***

 

Their trip to the beach only had to be pushed back two days as Clarke fully recovered. When she woke up the morning they left, she was feeling more or less like herself. She was even able to eat a normal breakfast of scrambled eggs, french toast, and bacon and feel full as opposed to sick.

She was also quickly moving into Horny Klutzy Clarke™ territory again. She and Lexa hadn't had sex since before Lexa went to Seattle.

Lexa wasn't faring any better. As soon as she caught sight of Clarke in her new bikini she was reminded of their FaceTime fun and she had to hug the side of the pool for quite a while to hide her erection because Abby was present.

So of course they attacked one another as soon as Abby went to bed. It was all they could do to make it to their shared bedroom before struggling out of their clothing. Horny Klutzy Clarke™ made an appearance as she tried to roll Lexa on her back to mount her but ended up miscalculating the distance to the edge of the bed. The next thing she knew, she was buck naked on the floor, looking up at a wide eyed Lexa.

“Whoops,” she said, blushing.

“Oh my god,” Lexa said, trying to not laugh. “Are you okay?”

Clarke nodded. “Just my pride is hurt,” she said as she carefully stood.

Lexa grabbed her hands and pulled her back on the bed. “Poor baby,” she cooed. “Let me kiss it and make it all better.”

“Where is my pride for you to kiss?” Clarke asked, now on her back.

Lexa just grinned and slid down Clarke's body.

“Oh!” Clarke gasped as Lexa's lips and tongue worked between her legs. “My pride is in my vagina?” she asked in a breathy voice.

“Pussy pride,” Lexa replied then dived in with renewed fervor.

Clarke didn't question that. She couldn't think at all with Lexa’s tongue doing that.

Later, as Lexa was sliding into her, Clarke hummed in pleasure, finally feeling whole again. “Have I told you how much I love feeling you inside me?” she whispers as they began a slow, steady rhythm.

Lexa smiled and kissed her. “Once or twice,” she murmured. “Have I told you how much I love you?”

“Once or twice,” Clarke answered with a cheeky grin.

Their sexual reunion didn't last long, both of them already painfully close before Lexa even entered her.

But their second reunion, oh, that was a slow buildup full of whispered promised and smooth as butter movements.

Clarke cried, burying her face in Lexa's neck and begging her not to leave her like that again. She'd have been embarrassed if Lexa hadn't let out a few of her own tears and promised that she wouldn't so long as she could help it.

They fell asleep naked with their legs and arms tangled under the sheets.

The following morning, Clarke had a sudden realization. “Oh shit.”

“What?” Lexa asked, toothbrush still in her mouth as she brushed her teeth after breakfast. She looked at Clarke who was standing in the bathroom doorway and holding a pill packet in her hand. “Is that your birth control?” she asked.

Clarke nodded. “Yeah. I've been taking it like clockwork every day,” she started. “But then I threw up a lot…” She trailed off, looking up at Lexa.

Lexa paused in her teeth brushing. She spat into the sink and wiped her mouth with a towel. “Does that make it not work?” she asked coming to stand in front of Clarke.

“I--I don't know,” she said. “I don't know if it had time to absorb into my bloodstream or if I puked it up. I know missing a dose is bad. It can, uh, allow for ovulation.”

Lexa sighed, knowing what needed to happen and not looking forward to it. “You know what we need to do, right?”

Clarke gave her a wide-eyed look. “Hope for the best?”

Lexa gave her a pointed look.

Clarke groaned. “Okay, fine,” she groaned. Then she softened. “I can do it alone,” she said. “If you're not comfortable.”

Lexa shook her head and kissed Clarke softly. “We're in this together,” was all she said.

Clarke nodded. “Okay. Let's go.”

Downstairs, they found Abby sitting on the back deck enjoying the cooler morning air before it got too warm. “Mom, can we talk to you about something?” Clarke asked as they exited the house.

Abby glanced up from her spot in the shade as she sat on the outdoor furniture. “What is it?” she asked, noting the serious look on their faces and immediately beginning to worry.

They sat on the bench seat adjacent to Abby's chair and Clarke took a calming breath. “Um, something happened and, well, I think I need Plan B,” she started carefully. Lexa squeezed her hand in a reassuring gesture.

Abby took a moment to process that. She put her book down on the table and sat up straighter in her chair as she studied her daughter and Lexa. “Okay,” she said calmly. “Why do you think this?”

“I've been taking my pills consistently,” Clarke said. “But then I was sick.”

Understanding dawned on Abby and she kicked herself for not thinking of that sooner. “You probably threw them up.”

Clarke nodded. “I didn't even think about it until just now when I went to take it.”

“Okay, did the condom break?” Abby asked.

The pair on the bench shared a look. “Umm,” Clarke said.

“Clarke,” Abby said, a warning in her voice. “Please tell me you're still using condoms.”

“What? I was on the pill and we're both free of STI’s…” she trailed off and sighed. “And the condoms felt… weird.”

“Weird?” Abby echoed, confused. “How so?” She’d never had an issue in her own experiences.

Clarke shrugged. “I don't know. Like they were… chafing me? Inside.” Her cheeks burned. “They just weren’t comfortable.”

Abby rubbed her temples. “You may have a sensitivity to latex,” she muttered. “Okay, let's talk this out. How long ago was your last period?”

Clarke thought for a moment. “It ended maybe two and half weeks ago? My next one is due in about a week.”

Abby nodded. “You're probably fine, but we should get you an emergency contraceptive just in case. You didn't have to tell me, but I'm glad you did.”

“Well I needed the prescription,” Clarke said. “Don't I need you for that since I'm a minor?”

Abby shook her head. “Laws have changed,” she explained. “Most drugstores even have it on the shelf. No need to talk to a pharmacist and they don't require an ID or date of birth.”

“Oh,” Clarke said, suddenly wishing she'd known that before this awkward conversation.

“Hopefully it doesn't come up again, but if it does, now you know,” Abby said. “And let this be a warning if you ever throw up your pill again. And we’ll avoid awkward conversations like this.”

Clarke nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”

“And they make other types of condoms,” she continued. “Made of different materials for people allergic to latex.”

“Mom,” Clarke said. “I know now to be extra careful if I get sick or something.”

“Maybe we should look into getting you an IUD,” Abby continued. “Then you wouldn’t have to worry about taking a pill every single day or throwing them up. You’ll be in college soon and I know what it’s like with the parties and drinking and hangovers. I’m not naive enough to think that you won’t drink enough to vomit at least once. And an IUD could help--”

“Mom!” Clarke interrupted, afraid her mother would just keep going. “Seriously. I’ll be fine. And I don’t plan to get that drunk. Ever.”

Abby sighed. “No one ever plans to drink that much,” she said. “Well, most people don’t. But think about the IUD anyway? Please?”

Clarke nodded. It would be nice to not have to think about a pill every day… “Can we just go to the store now? I want to get it over with.”

Abby sighed and nodded. “And some latex-free condoms.”

“Mom,” Clarke started.

Lexa beat Abby to the punch. “We're still unprotected,” Lexa guessed.

“It takes about seven days for them to become effective again,” Abby added. “Would you prefer to just wait seven days?”

“Oh, right,” Clarke said, gave still bright red. “Um, no, we should get them. I'm just gonna go get my shoes.” She stood and quickly went inside.

Lexa, who was already wearing her Chucks, cleared her throat, feeling awkward. She picked at the skin next to her thumbnail. “I, uh, I'm sorry about this,” she said, staring at her feet.

Abby picked up her forgotten book and slid the bookmark inside before closing it and setting it aside. “It's okay,” she said softly. “Accidents happen, and the important thing is you immediately sought a solution rather than hope for the best or ignore it. I'm glad you came to me. That showed real maturity.”

Lexa looked up. “Yeah?”

Abby nodded. “Just, try not to let it happen again, okay?”

Lexa nodded. “We won't.” She licked her dry lips nervously. “Um, are you going to mention this to my mom?”

Abby considered that for a moment. “I don't like the idea of keeping secrets from her,” she said carefully. “I've come to consider her a friend.”

Lexa nodded. “I respect that,” she said. “I just… does she need to know this particular detail?”

Abby sighed. “I guess not. I won't say anything unless she asks.”

Lexa nodded, happy with that. “Thank you. And I promise we'll be more careful.”

Abby stood and looked down at Lexa with a pointed yet playful glare. “You better,” she said. “I don't want to be a grandmother until Clarke graduates college. And med school if that's what she decides.”

Lexa took that for the loving warning that it was. “Yes ma'am.”

Abby gave a single nod and made her way to the door. “Let's go, then.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my version of a pregnancy scare. I didn't want to go as far as Clarke actually thinking she may be pregnant, but I did want to address this at the same time. If you get sick while on BC pills, use a backup method! 
> 
>  
> 
> Fun Fact of the Day: I have a latex intolerance (not a true allergy, per say, just a sensitivity? Idk) and regular latex condoms really do feel like they're chafing my vagina. (I've never had sex with someone with a penis, but condoms really help with clean up on dildos FYI). I don't even feel non-latex condoms tbh.


	24. Looking Towards the Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa is a green eyed monster, Ranya have an important conversation, and Clarke and Lexa discuss the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter! But no worries; there will be an epilogue AND future one-shots set in this universe. :)

“I can't believe I forgot about this place,” Clarke said as they walked hand in hand from the car towards the restaurant, giddiness in her voice. It was their last night in Coronado and Abby had let her take the car so she could take Lexa on a proper date, which they hadn't been on in quite a while. (Marathon sex didn't really count as a date, did it?) When thinking up where to take Lexa, Abby had jokingly suggested this place and Clarke had lit up like a Christmas tree. It had been her dad’s favorite place to take Clarke when they were in Coronado when she was young.

The premise of the restaurant was literally a pirate’s ship from the exterior to the inside decor. Even the wait staff wore pirate’s costumes complete with an eye patch and pirate hats. It was all very ridiculous but Clarke had loved it when she was a kid.

“Oh my,” Lexa said as they stepped into the restaurant.

“Told ya,” Clarke said, grinning. She'd warned Lexa about the level of cheese this place had, which only made brunette more excited.

Once they were seated, a waiter with a pair of glasses over his eye patch took their drink orders. Lexa struggled not to laugh aloud at his fake pirate accent.

“This place is amazing,” Lexa said once he'd left.

Clarke nodded. “I used to get a kick out of it all,” she said. “My dad would take with the same pirate accent all night. It drove my mom crazy, but I loved it.”

“Do you want me to talk in a pirate accent?” Lexa asked.

Clarke grimaced and picked up her menu. “No,” she said. “Your normal voice is sexy as is.”

Despite the cheesy, overbearing decor of the restaurant, the food was actually phenomenal. The sounds that Clarke made as she devoured her crab legs should be illegal, at least in public. Though, Lexa didn’t have much room to talk as she let out a moan at the taste of her own shrimp linguini in a lemon butter sauce.

There was no way they could eat dessert, so of course they ordered a piece of chocolate ganache cake to go.

“Good evening, miss,” a voice said as Clarke was fishing out her debit card to pay for the meal. Lexa had excused herself to the bathroom, so Clarke looked up to find a woman smiling down at her. She was wearing black pants and a plain white button down shirt with the restaurant’s logo that told Clarke she was management, though she appeared only a few years older than Clarke. Dark, nearly black, hair with red tips, dramatic makeup, and an average build. “How was your meal?” the woman asked.

“Delicious,” Clarke answered politely as she slid her card into the pocket of the bill holder.

“Excellent,” the woman said with an over-enthusiastic smile and a clap of her hands. “My family owns this place, so it’s nice to hear that. Are you a local?”

Clarke blinked up at her, wondering why she was still talking and asking her questions. “Uh, no. Just in town for the week.”

“Well, I hope you enjoy your time here. Will you be frequenting our establishment often on your visit?”

Okay, now Clarke was really confused. Didn’t the manager of a restaurant just ask how the meal was and move on to the next table? “We’re heading home tomorrow morning,” she said, polite but curt. Where was Lexa? She glanced towards the bathrooms and let out a sigh of relief when she saw that familiar cascade of curly brown hair appear.

“Oh, too bad,” the woman said. “It’s not often we get anyone other than families with young children in here. Particularly a woman as pretty as you.”

Oh.

Oh!

This woman was hitting on her. Yikes.

More yikes, Lexa was close enough to hear that final comment and she stopped in her tracks, eyes narrowing. Clarke gave her a ‘help me’ look, but the manager gave Clarke a sly smile and grabbed the bill folder before Lexa could say anything. “I’ll be back with your receipt,” she said, then turned and walked away.

“What the fuck?” Clarke asked, incredulous.

Lexa slid into the booth beside her, though she’d been in the booth opposite her the entire evening. Then she put her arm around Clarke’s shoulder.

Clarke grinned up at her. “Alexandria Woods, are you jealous?”

“No,” Lexa said tersely.

Clarke reached up and pressed a quick kiss to her jaw. “You know I only have eyes for you, baby.” She called Lexa that to soothe her, knowing she secretly loved the pet name.

It worked, Lexa relaxed a bit and cracked a smile. “I know.” She kissed Clarke’s temple.

It wasn’t until the woman returned with Clarke’s card and the receipt that she felt Lexa tense up again, her arm tightening automatically on her shoulders. Clarke almost felt bad for the woman when she noticed Lexa’s closeness and her grin faltered, turning into a polite, but stiff smile.

“Well, that was awkward,” Clarke said as she retrieved her card and put it away in her wallet. She wrote in a tip for their waiter and signed the merchant copy. She wasn’t even going to grab the customer copy, but something caught Lexa’s eye.

“Oh my god,” Lexa groaned.

“What?”

Lexa pulled the customer copy out and showed it to Clarke. On the bottom was a handwritten note in red pen. _Next time your in town text me & I’ll show you around the city. Maybe I can teach you how to surf._ A phone number was also on the receipt.

“I don’t know what’s worse,” Clarke said. “The bad flirting or the poor grammar.”

Lexa grunted and waded the receipt in her hand, tossing it into her glass still half-full of raspberry iced tea.

“Hey, maybe I needed a tour guide,” Clarke teased. Of course she had no intention of using the phone number, or even taking the paper with her. But it was fun to tease Lexa.

“Sure, like ‘show you around town’ isn’t a euphemism for ‘take you back to my place and seduce you,’” Lexa said, jaw tense.

“You’re so sexy when you’re all jealous and possessive,” Clarke said with a sly grin. The she leaned forward and lowered her voice. “You should take me home and make sure I know exactly who I belong to.” The suggestion in her voice gave Lexa no room to misinterpret what her true meaning was.

“Let’s go.”

As Lexa slammed her back against the wall just inside the beach house as soon as the door closed behind them, Clarke was instantly glad that her mother was out for the night with a college friend who lived in San Diego. Abby had told them that she wouldn’t be back before ten, and had added that she’d text Clarke before heading back. Neither of them admitted why she was going to text Clarke, but in that moment, she was immensely glad she’d received no such text. Because, oh fuck, Lexa was going to take her right there in the foyer.

Jesus fucking christ.

Lexa attached her lips to Clarke’s neck, surely making a mark, but in the moment, Clarke couldn’t bring herself to care. Lexa could mark her all she wanted.

Clarke had worn a flowy halter dress with no bra (she knew she'd only be able to get away with that for a few more years, but she also knew it drove Lexa crazy) that fell to mid-thigh, so in no time Lexa had hiked the skirt up and had her hands on Clarke’s ass. “Fuck, Clarke,” she gasped when she encountered bare skin and only a thin strip of fabric running between her cheeks. Clarke was wearing a thong. Lexa shivered.

Clarke grinned and reached down to undo the button and zipper of Lexa’s dark jeans. She quickly slid her hand beneath the denim and boxer briefs to wrap around Lexa’s solid length, already hard and pulsing in her hand.

Lexa grunted and desperately pushed her jeans and underwear down far enough to fully release her erection. There was no time to make it to a bed. Or even take her pants off. Her ass was left bare, the jeans and boxer briefs around her upper thighs.

Thank god the seven days for Clarke’s birth control to begin working again had passed because neither one of them would have been patient enough to search for one of the latex-free condoms. As it was, Lexa was already pulling Clarke’s thong aside, too impatient to take it off. Clarke didn’t even have to be asked to hook one leg on Lexa’s hip as the other girl rocked into her, the tip of her dick running through her drenched folds.

“Yes,” Clarke gasped. “Fuck me.” She could feel the delicious sting of denim chafing her inner thighs and it only served to heighten her arousal.

“Mine,” Lexa said as she surged forward, sinking into Clarke in a single stroke. They both cried out in pleasure.

“Yours,” Clarke echoed, gripping the fabric of Lexa’s shirt tails in her hands. “Now fuck me. Hard. Make me feel it for days.”

Lexa did just that, thrusting into Clarke with a nearly wild abandon. Clarke gasped and let out a slight squeal of delight with each of Lexa’s thrusts. She reached up and untied the halter strap of her dress and let it fall around her waist where her skirt was already bunched up, baring her breasts. Lexa made a sound of intense approval and moved to close her mouth around a rock hard nipple and bite down around Clarke's areola, just hard enough to leave a mark, but not enough to hurt Clarke. Much. There was a bit of pain from Lexa's bite, but Clarke loved it. She reached up to pinch her other nipple hard, trying to mimic the hurt that felt so good.

“Yours,” Clarke said as Lexa continued her frenzy of thrusts and bites. “Yours, yours, yours.” Suddenly, Clarke was squeezing harder than Lexa could ever remember around her dick, throwing her head back against the wall with a solid thud, and screaming out her name as the orgasm was ripped from her, her chest heaving in time with her cries of intense pleasure.

Lexa let go of Clarke's breast to latch onto her exposed neck as she thrust one, two, three more times harder than ever before spilling spurt after spurt of cum inside her, filling her up.

Clarke slumped against Lexa like a ragdoll as her orgasm began to subside. Lexa did her best to support her in her own time of post-orgasm weakness, just barely managing to keep them both upright.

“That was so fucking hot,” Clarke murmured against Lexa's chest. “I need to make you jealous more often.”

Lexa growled low in her chest, causing Clarke to chuckle and finally lift her head to stare into Lexa's forest green eyes, still spiked with arousal. Then she giggled.

“What?” Lexa asked, perplexed.

“I just thought about how the phrase ‘green eyed monster’ fits so perfectly,” she said. “Because you have green eyes.”

Lexa rolled those very eyes and took a small step back, pulling out of Clarke carefully. She grinned as she moved her thong back into place, knowing it would become covered in their combined fluids. For some reason, that really turned her on to think of Clarke wearing panties that were drenched with the proof of their intimate relationship. As did the sight of the bruise beginning to form on Clarke's left breast.

She quickly tucked herself back into her underwear but left her jeans undone. Before she could try to help Clarke, the blond grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the stairs. “I'm not done with you yet,” Clarke said. “I demand at least three more orgasms tonight.”

Lexa gave her five more.

 

***

 

“Are you sure about this?”

Lexa swallowed and gave a small nod. She looked at the Assistant District Attorney assigned to prosecute the case, Indra, via Skype. “I'm sure,” she said. She couldn't even explain to herself why she was opting to testify in person, but that was her final choice. Maybe it was because she needed to face Cody, the instigator of the attack and the one who'd been the one to repeatedly kick her groin.

“Okay,” Indra said. “If you change your mind, let me know. But we need to have a final decision at least a week before the trial, just to make sure we're able to practice in the correct setting.”

Lexa nodded. It was only the first week of August and the trial wasn't set until the beginning of November, but they were trying to get all the details arranged.

“Clarke, are you okay with this decision?” Indra asked.

Clarke nodded from her position beside Lexa. “I am,” she said. “You said my time on the stand should be pretty short.”

Indra nodded in confirmation.

“Then I'll be fine,” Clarke said.

“Good. Ladies, if I could talk to just your parents for a moment? No need to leave the room, but put them on camera.”

Lexa turned her computer to face her own parents and Abby. She didn't really pay attention to what was said, only nestled into Clarke for comfort. She was sure about testifying in person, but that didn't make it any less scary. She would be surprised if she didn't have a panic attack at some point.

“You okay?” Clarke whispered into her ear.

Lexa nodded. “I'll be fine,” she said. “It's just nerve-wracking.”

Clarke nodded in agreement, hugging her close. “I'm here, okay? Even if you wake up from a nightmare at two in the morning, I'm here. Just a call away. Okay?”

Lexa nodded, fully believing her girlfriend. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Clarke said. She kissed her temple before focusing in on what her Lexa's dad was saying.

“I guess I'm still wondering why we're not pressing stalking charges,” Gustus said gruffly. Clarke had never seen him anything other than cheerful except when it came to protecting his children.

“We are in a way,” Indra said. “Since it's across state lines, it's a case for the Feds. Unfortunately, they don't bother with seemingly small cases like this, but we use the information for a restraining order.”

“Small case?” Gustus repeated, getting agitated. Iris placed a calming hand on his arm.

“I don't agree with them that it's small,” Indra assured. “In fact, I believe that this case may set a precedent for future hate crimes that are similar in nature. But unfortunately, the Feds are insistent that anything less than murder or terrorism is not worth their time or effort. But it doesn't matter because I'm going to nail this asshole. You have my word that I will do everything in my power to ensure justice, Mr. Woods.”

That seemed to appease Gustus, at least for the time being.

“And what about Clarke?” Abby asked. “Will the restraining order protect her, too?”

“That's a bit more complicated, I'm afraid,” Indra said with a sigh. “He didn't contact her directly.”

“But he threatened her!” Abby cried. “You saw the things he said he was going to do to her.” She sounded shaken at the memory of Cody’s words, particularly the phrase ‘rip that cunt to shreds until she bleeds.’ She shuddered and took a deep breath to try and calm the sick feeling she got in her stomach.

“I know,” Indra said. “And I'm going to try my best to see that the judge sees that he's a threat to Clarke as well. But laws are unfortunately murky at best in this situation.”

Abby looked distraught.

“I promise I'll do everything I can,” Indra said.

Abby nodded, hoping it would be enough.

Once the Skype call was ended, they all sat there a little worse for the wear and caught up in the emotions of the situation. Clarke felt her nose burn with unshed tears and noticed Lexa was also struggling.

She could have kissed Aden when he got home from his baseball game and yelled out that he'd hit for the cycle in an excited voice. Clarke later found out that meant that he'd had a single, double, triple, and a homerun all in one game. Iris insisted that Abby and Clarke join them for dinner, to which they agreed without hesitation.

Clarke looked around the table as they ate, feeling a warm feeling that she hadn't felt in a long time. Not since before her dad died.

Anya had joined them and was discussing her fall schedule of classes with Abby. Iris was asking Clarke about her art. Aden was excitedly recapping his game to Gustus and Lexa. It was loud and full of laughter and jokes and good food.

It felt like a family. It felt like home.

 

***

  
Raven stared at the woman in front of her, admiring her every movement and feeling herself get more and more aroused with each passing moment. She wasn’t even doing anything particularly sexy, for god’s sake!

Cooking. Anya was cooking.

Breakfast, to be exact. Pancakes and bacon, to be even more precise.

And Raven was getting a freaking complex at how much she enjoyed watching her. She’d stayed every single night since the girl had gotten back from Seattle. That was nearly three weeks ago. Raven was due to start school again in less than a week, meaning she’d have to return home.

Dammit.

She didn’t want to leave this domesticated bliss and that scared the fuck out of her. What had become of her? She’d become a freaking lovesick pile of nauseatingly sweet feelings.

“I love you.”

Whoa. Who said that? Had those words come out of her own mouth? Given Anya’s comical freeze-frame as she flipped a pancake, they had. Fuck!

Anya slowly set the spatula down and turned to face a wide-eyed Raven. She nearly laughed aloud at the shocked expression on her girlfriend’s face. “Took you long enough,” she said. Then she turned back around and turned off the griddle.

“Wha-what?” Raven asked.

Anya slid a stack of pancakes and a plate of bacon onto the kitchen island where Raven was seated on a tall stool. She braced her hands on the countertop and looked at Raven with an amused expression. “I was wondering how long you’d last. You’ve been acting weird and I figured that was it.”

Raven began to panic at the way Anya hadn’t returned the sentiment. Crap. She’d ruined everything. Her big stupid mouth.

“I love you, too, you doofus.”

Oh.

“You do?” Raven asked, shocked again.

Anya rolled her eyes. “Of course I do,” she said. “I knew it as soon as I saw how protective you were of my sister. I realized then just how amazing you are, Raven.”

Raven swallowed against the lump in her throat. “I don’t want to leave,” she said, feeling the tears forming in her eyes. She blinked them back angrily. Raven never cried, goddammit. “I don’t want to go back home.”

Anya rounded the island and hugged Raven, pulling her tight against her.

“I wish I could stay,” Raven continued, her voice muffled by Anya’s tank top.

“I know,” Anya said. “I wish you could, too.” She wished that more than anything. She wished it for Raven’s sake more than her own. She needed to be out of that apartment, out of the clutches of her mother. An idea popped into her head. “Hey, what about my room?” she asked. “At my parents’ house? They love you, you know.”

Raven laughed. “Sure, I’ll just move into my girlfriends’ parents’ house. That’s not weird at all.”

Anya pulled back and looked at Raven. “I’m serious. They worry about you. I-I told them about your mom, how horrible she is.”

Raven’s eyes flashed with anger for a split second, but then she softened when she realized that Anya was only trying to help. And she was right. Her mom was pretty terrible. But she still shook her head. “I can’t impose,” she said. “I don’t want be a charity case.”

Anya thought for a minute. “You won’t be,” she said. “My dad is always trying to fix things and failing. I’m sure there are plenty of projects you could do to help them out. They’d end up saving money in the long run. And you know my mom. She always makes too much food. She feeds you as it is.”

Raven snorted. That part was definitely true. The fridge was packed full of leftovers from Iris, which was still too much for Anya, Raven, and Harper to ever finish.

“My mom is a nurse, it’s in her blood to help people,” Anya said. “And my dad is a big softy, especially when it comes to you and Clarke.”

Raven still hesitated. “I don’t know…”

Anya understood her hesitation. “At least let me talk to them about it? See what they say? Then you can make a decision.”

Raven sighed, but nodded. “Okay. But, don’t tell them like I’m asking them for anything.”

“I know,” Anya said. “I’ll bring it up like it’s my idea. Because it was.”

Raven fell back against Anya, locking her arms tight around her slim waist.

“I love you,” Anya whispered against her ear, then kissed her neck softly.

“I love you, too,” Raven said, now freely crying.

Moments later, Anya tried to pull back, but Raven held her firmly. “Rae, the food’s getting cold.”

“I don’t care,” Raven said. “I’d rather hug you than eat right now.”

The words shocked even Raven, but neither commented on it.

 

***

 

“I can’t believe summer is already over,” Lexa said softly as they gazed upwards. They were at their favorite date night place. Stargazing, of course.

It was Sunday. Classes were due to begin the following morning, bright and early. Their senior year.

“Me, neither,” Clarke said, hugging Lexa close. “So much has happened this summer.”

Lexa grinned. “We fell in love.”

Clarke shook her head. “No, I did that well before summer,” she said honestly.

Lexa tilted her head to the side. “Yeah? When?”

Clarke thought carefully. “Honestly, it was probably on the beach, when you told me about what happened in D.C.,” she said.

“Really?”

Clarke nodded. “Really. What about you?”

“When you brought me here the first time,” she said. “And you told me about your dad. I think I loved you before that, but that’s when I knew for sure.”

“It feels like we’ve been together longer than four months,” Clarke lamented.

Lexa knit her eyebrow. “It’s really only been that long?”

Clarke nodded. “Yeah. We made things official on April 14th. It’s August 13th. Tomorrow is four months.”

“Huh,” Lexa said, not quite believing it hadn’t been much longer. She felt so close and connected to Clarke that it really did seem like they’d known each other for years. Decades. A lifetime. She sighed. “Whatever, I know you’re my soulmate.”

“Soulmate, huh?”

Lexa kissed her softly. “Definitely. I’m gonna marry you one day, Clarke. I just know it.”

Clarke felt her heart race. “You do?”

Lexa nodded. “I do.” Then she laughed at the words and how they were connected to a wedding. “You know what I mean.”

Clarke nodded. “I do,” she said with a chuckle. Then she turned serious. “I know it, too.”

Lexa beamed. “And babies,” she added. “Lots of babies.”

Clarke let out a loud laugh. “Hey, now,” she said. “I want kids, but not too many. I have a lot of schooling ahead of me if I want to be a surgeon.”

“Not an artist?”

Clarke shrugged. “I’m not certain yet, but right now, I’m leaning towards med school.”

“Your mom will be happy to hear that,” Lexa said.

“My mom isn’t going to know until I make a final decision,” Clarke said.

“Got it.”

They fell silent for several minutes, watching the night sky.

“Five,” Lexa said suddenly.

“Five what?”

“Kids.”

Clarke snorted. “No way am I pushing five kids out of my hooha. Two.”

“Four.”

“Two.”

“That’s not how you negotiate, Clarke,” Lexa said with a grin.

“Says the person who gets to do all the fun parts of creating a child,” Clarke said. “Two. Final offer.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and laid her head on Clarke’s shoulder. “I’ll convince you yet,” she teased.

“You can try.”

“I will.”

“I love you, Lexa.”

“I love you, too, Clarke.”

 

_[Fade to black.]_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the epilogue, there will be a time jump to November and we'll see the results of the trial. 
> 
> I'm not about to write a sappy note about how much I enjoyed writing this and interacting with you lovely people because I'm not done! Keep an eye out for those one-shots (several of which I've already written or at least started). They will be parts of the FBED!verse series and will jump around in time. There will be lots of domestic!Clexa so stay tuned! :) 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: The jealous/possessive Lexa sex scene was by far my favorite to write.


	25. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light, justice, fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it. I can't believe it! Thank you to everyone who ever commented, left kudos, bookmarked, or even just read this fic! I could not have done this without your constant words of encouragement. I love you all. :)
> 
>  
> 
> Disclaimer about this chapter: As previously stated, I have next to zero knowledge of legal proceedings beyond the scope of what I've seen on TV. I tried my best to research but things may be a bit off in this chapter. Just remember: it's an AU, so if something isn't quite right, pretend it is! :)

The morning of November 6, 2017 dawned cold and brisk in the nation's capital. The sky was overcast in various tones of gray with the threat of impending rainfall. Lexa smoothed her shirt for the hundredth time, palms sweaty and hands shaking as she stood in front of the full length mirror, studying her reflection. Indra had instructed her to be as feminine as she was comfortable with. Juries were sexist by nature and were more sympathetic to feminine women. Assholes.

Regardless, she heeded Indra’s suggestion. A skirt or dress was out of the question for Lexa. She’d never been comfortable in such clothing and she knew it would only hinder her performance on the stand. And she was being called by Indra first thing. But her dress slacks were perfectly tailored and a heather gray that complimented the blouse she’d opted for. The shirt was definitely more Clarke’s style with its subtle floral print in light blues and corals. And the scoop neck. Black mid-heeled ankle boots finished the look.

This would have to do.

Now if only she could figure out what to do with her hair and her makeup. She stared defiantly at her sparse makeup bag. She never wore much more than under-eye concealer and a bit of eyeliner. Was she expected to freaking contour?

The bathroom door of the hotel room opened and Clarke emerged freshly showered and ready for the day. She looked as polished and put together as ever. Her hair was perfectly curled, the front sections pulled back in a twisted fashion, and her makeup was subtle, but feminine.

Goddammit.

“Hey,” Clarke said, noticing Lexa’s near-panic state. She’d expected this, so she was prepared. “Want me to do your hair and makeup?”

Lexa looked grateful and nodded. “Thank you,” she whispered.

Clarke kissed her and instructed her to sit on the bed. Half an hour later, her hair was in an elegant side braid and her face was lightly covered in more makeup than she’d ever worn, but it looked good. Subtle. She grimaced at the feel of the lipstick, though.

“Don’t bite your lips,” Clarke said. “It’ll dry soon.”

“Does that mean I can’t kiss you?” Lexa pouted.

Clarke laughed, glad that Lexa was still making jokes. “Not yet, babe.” She replaced all the makeup products in the bag and took Lexa’s hands in her own. “How are you feeling?”

Lexa took a deep breath and concentrated on Clarke’s face. “I’m okay,” she said. “I just want to get this all over and done with.”

Clarke smiled softly. “I’m so proud of you, you know,” she said. “Not many people would be able to do this. Hell, I’m terrified and I wasn’t even directly involved.”

Lexa shrugged. “I want justice.”

Clarke nodded. “I know. But still. You’re incredibly brave and that makes me so proud to call you my girlfriend.” She stood and pulled a small box out of her bag. It was flat and obviously a jewelry box. “Here,” she said, handing it to Lexa as she sat beside her again. “I was going to wear this but I think you need it more than I do.”

Lexa gave her a curious look then opened the box. Inside lay a delicate gold chain and a crescent moon pendant.

“My dad gave me this on my thirteenth birthday,” Clarke explained. She figured the pendant. “He said the moon represents light in a time of darkness.”

“Oh, Clarke, I can't,” Lexa said, pushing the box back towards Clarke. “It's yours. I couldn't.”

“I want you to,” Clarke said. She picked the necklace up and put the box to the side. “My dad would love you, you know. And I know he'd be just as fiercely protective as I am. Wear this and when you're on the stand, remember that there's light in the darkness.” She brought the necklace around Lexa's neck and moved her hair to the side so she could fasten the clasp.

Lexa brought her hand up to run her fingers over the crescent moon. Light in the darkness. Clarke was her light in this darkness. Clarke was her light in any darkness.

She felt her eyes well with tears as she leaned forward to pull Clarke into a tight hug. “Thank you,” she whispered. “For everything.”

Clarke wrapped her arms around her girlfriend and held her close, not wanting to break the moment and return to reality.

Reality, of course, came barreling back when a knock sounded on the door to their room.

Clarke sighed and went to answer it. Raven and Anya stood on the other side, holding hands. Clarke was really glad those two had gotten their act together and admitted their feeling for one another. Now, Raven was living with the Woods’, which also made her ecstatic. She’d never liked Raven’s mother. Behind them stood Octavia and Lincoln, who had come along for support without hesitation.

“Hey,” Clarke said, stepping aside to let them in. Raven immediately ran to Lexa and hugged her. In the months they’d been living in the same house, they’d grown incredibly close and Raven was just as protective of her as Anya and Clarke, if not moreso.

“If he even looks at you funny, I’m going to punch him in the throat,” Raven said.

“No,” Clarke warned. “You do not get arrested in D.C. We need you back home too much.”

Raven sighed. “Fine,” she said. Anya put an arm around her waist, effectively calming her.

“Are you ready for this?” Anya asked her sister.

Lexa stood and gave herself one last look at herself in the mirror and nodded. “Let's do this.”

 

***

  
Green.

That was the color of Lexa's face.

She'd done okay when the defendant, Cody Landers, had entered the courtroom. She'd actually almost laughed at his attempt to look like an innocent boy, but she knew better.

She'd done okay when the opening statements were given, Indra driving hard into the jury that this was a true hate crime. The defense attorney had called it a misunderstanding with an unfortunate outcome.

She'd even done okay when Indra had called her to the stand to testify. It had gone exactly as they'd practice, and she'd only felt tears threaten once when she described in detail the assault.

But now. Now it was time for the defense lawyer to cross-examine her. The defense had requested a recess before cross-examination, much to Lexa's surprise. But she was grateful for the reprieve. She needed a moment. “I need the bathroom.”

Clarke immediately followed her without question. Lexa was expecting it but didn't slow down. She felt the panic rising quickly.

“Breathe,” Clarke said as soon as the door closed behind them. A middle-aged woman stood at the sink fixing her lipstick and giving them an odd look, but they didn't even notice. “Look at me and breathe.”

Lexa tried hard to regulate her breathing, but was quickly losing control. She hated losing control. It made her panic even more.

“Here,” the previously unnoticed woman said, breaking Clarke's concentration on Lexa. She looked up to see the woman holding a brown paper bag.

Clarke grabbed it and shook it open for Lexa to breathe into. “Deep breaths, baby,” she said. “Deep breaths.”

Soon, Lexa was breathing regularly and her tears had subsided. She kept breathing into the bag, but she was much calmer. Clarke looked around for the mystery woman, finding her standing by the door looking concerned. “Thanks,” she said. “You just carry paper bags on you at all times?”

The woman gave her a small smile. “I work with a lot of special victims,” she explained. “Panic attack are unfortunately common for my clients.”

Clarke nodded. “Well, thanks,” she said again.

“You're welcome,” the woman said. She made a move to exit, but paused and looked at Lexa. “Lexa, right?”

Lexa looked like she was about to panic again, so the woman rushed to finish.

“I think you're incredibly brave and hope you nail that little bastard.” Then she smiled broadly. “You're giving a lot of people a voice right now.”

Lexa slowly lowered the bag. “I just want justice.”

“Keep fighting,” the woman said. Then she was gone.

Clarke turned back to Lexa and cupped her cheek in her hand. “Okay?”

Lexa nodded slowly. “I mean, no, but yes.”

Clarke understood exactly what she meant by that and kissed her softly. “Just remember, there's light in the darkness.”

Lexa automatically reached up and fingered the gold charm on the necklace. “Light in the darkness,” she repeated. Then she gave a firm nod. “Okay.”

“You're amazing,” Clarke said. “Remember that.”

Lexa blushed slightly. “You are,” she said. “Seriously, Clarke. I couldn't do this without you. You're my light.”

Clarke kissed her again, then pressed her forehead against hers. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Seconds later, the door pushed open and Octavia walked in. “Hey, there you are. Indra says you need to come back now. Are you okay?”

Lexa nodded and crumpled the bag up in her hand, tossing it effortlessly into the wastebin by the door. It went in, nothing but net. “Let's get this over with.”

As she took the stand for a second time, Lexa locked eyes with Clarke who nodded at her, conveying so many words with just a look. Then she noticed the mystery woman from the bathroom in the second to last row. The woman gave her an encouraging smile and a thumbs-up.

Lexa took a deep breath and steeled herself to face the defense attorney.

She held gripped Clarke's necklace the entire time, reminding herself of the light in the darkness.

Later, Indra informed them that the mystery woman was Danielle ‘Dani’ Gertz, a detective for the Special Victims Unit there in D.C. She was essentially the Olivia Benson of the nation’s capital.

Detective Gertz had helped the lead detective on the case and had felt a personal connection to Lexa's story, so she'd requested to be present. Lexa didn't know what the personal connection was, but she had a guess.

As they exited the building after the judge called for a recess until the following morning, Lexa locked eyes with the detective once more. She gave her a slight nod of thanks.

“Everything okay?” Clarke asked from beside her, giving her hand a slight squeeze.

Lexa blinked and turned to look at Clarke. “Yeah,” she said. “I just need you.” She hugged Clarke tightly.

“I'm right here,” Clarke whispered into her hair. “I'll always be here.”

 

***

  
At two seventeen in the afternoon on November 10, 2017, it was announced that a verdict had been reached by the jury after only a few hours of deliberation.

Lexa had a death grip on Clarke's hand as they walked back into the courtroom and took their seats behind the prosecutor’s table. On Lexa's other side were her parents. In the row directly behind them were Anya, Raven, Abby, Octavia, and Lincoln. Lincoln’s aunt, Evie, had even been present for parts of the trial, including when Lexa was on the stand.

She'd never been more grateful for a solid support system.

Clarke squeezed her hand as the jury proceeded into the room and Lexa was sure her heart was about to burst out of her chest as the chairman of the jury handed the judge the paper with their official verdict on it. The judge read it, nodded, and handed the paper back.

“Chairman of the jury, how do you find the defendant?” Judge Franklin Eastwood asked.

The chairman faced the court. “On the charge of assault in the first degree, we the jury find the defendant, Codsworth Malcom Landers…”

 

***

 

“Guilty of all charges!”

Lexa braced herself as Raven nearly bowled her over outside the courtroom. The verdict had been read. Lexa was still in a state of shock.

“Raven, I can't breathe,” Lexa gasped out.

“Too bad,” Raven said, but she loosened her grip.

“Hey, get off my girlfriend,” Clarke said jokingly as she tugged at Raven’s arm. They stood in the atrium waiting for their parents to join them. Being that the defendant was the son of a prominent senator, the media was all over the case. Though now eighteen, Lexa had been a minor at the time of the incident and, therefore, the specifics of the case had been kept confidential, and no press had been allowed into the courtroom. Which meant they were all clamoring outside the building, waiting for a glimpse of the participants.

Lexa was not ready to face that crowd.

Clarke moved to hug Lexa as soon as Raven stepped back. She couldn't stop hugging her. Lexa didn't mind, of course. “You did it,” Clarke spoke softly into Lexa's ear.

“We did it,” Lexa said. “I wouldn't have been able to do this without you.” She pulled back and placed her hands on Clarke's cheeks to pulled her in for a soft kiss. The world around them faded until it was just the two of them.

Well, until the doors to the courtroom burst open and a flurry of people exited, nearly barreling them over in their haste to leave.

The senator and his entourage.

Clarke tightened her grip on Lexa even as Anya, Raven, Octavia, and Lincoln moved to form a human wall between her and the snake of a politician. Leading up to the trial, Senator Jeffrey Landers and his team of lawyers had tried every tactic in the book to intimidate and threaten Lexa and the prosecution.

It hadn't worked.

Now, the senator paused when he saw Lexa and started to move towards her, face nearly purple with rage. “You little dykes.”

“I'd watch what you say, Senator,” Lincoln said, stepping to the forefront. In the months since graduating, Lincoln had gotten involved in MMA and had the newly developed muscles to show for it (much to Octavia’s intense pleasure). He didn't directly threaten the senator, but he made it known that he'd have to go through him to get to his friend.

Luckily, the door opened again and the parents as well as Indra walked out to join them. Though Lincoln was beefed up, Gustus was massive. As soon as he noticed the standoff, he immediately moved to stand behind Lexa and Clarke, a protective hand on each of their shoulders. Iris and Abby stared, daring him to say something. Indra, however, walked right up to him and smirked.

“That was quite the show, Senator,” she said with false sweetness in her voice. “Very entertaining. I quite enjoy having my objections sustained so much. Really lets me know that I'm doing my job right. You might want to think about firing that incompetent lawyer of yours, though.” With that, she turned and gave Lexa a sharp nod before walking briskly out of the courthouse.

Thankfully, the senator wisely chose to not say anything else. Instead he stormed off in a huff.

Clarke felt Lexa relax next to her.

“How do people like that even exist?” Iris asked. She walked over to hug her daughter.

“I don't know,” Gustus said, kissing his wife’s temple. “I just don't know.”

“We should celebrate,” Octavia piped up in attempt to return to the joyful mood.

Lexa shook her head. “I'm exhausted,” she said. “I really want to just take a nap.”

So that's what they did. And when Lexa woke up, she felt rejuvenated, like it was really just hitting her that the instigator of her attack was going to be punished. It still remained to see exactly what his sentence would be, but Indra had said she'd be surprise if he didn't get at least five years, even with his connections. What it had really come down to was Lexa's testimony and the other perpetrators’ written confessions in exchange for plea deals. Each one would serve a year in prison and have to pay a hefty sum of money that would allow for Lexa to pay for college even if she didn't get that full scholarship that she was going for.

“I want to celebrate,” Lexa said as she got dressed post-nap. “I want to do something a bit crazy to remind us of this day and why I need to always fight.”

Clarke looked up at her from her position on the bed. “Yeah? You already have an idea on just how to commemorate this day?”

Lexa nodded and kissed Clarke. “I want to get a tattoo. And I think you should, too.”

Clarke's eyebrow raised in surprise. They were both eighteen now, Lexa on September 2nd, and Clarke on October 31st (yes, she'd been a Halloween baby--Raven often joked that she must be the Spawn of Satan). “Oh yeah? And just want tattoo do you want? I refuse to get matching tattoos. That's so cheesy.”

Lexa grinned. “You'll see. Not matching ones, I promise.”

Hours later, Lexa, wearing only a pair of sweatpants and a black sports bra, starred in the mirror at the freshly inked tattoo, still red and puffy. The words in a pretty but not too fancy script lined her left side, running vertically from the bottom-most rib to just below her bra line.

_I choose to fight._

Clarke walked into the bathroom then, grinning when she saw her girlfriend admiring the work. “It's perfect.” She kissed the back of her shoulder and bit down softly.

Lexa grinned and turned in Clarke's arms. “Like you,” she said. She kissed her and stepped back and grabbed Clarke's hand to look down at her own fresh tattoo, a simple crescent moon the same size and shape of the pendant her dad had given her. She'd chosen to have it inked on the side of her left wrist, just below her thumb joint with the explanation that she'd be able to see it every time she went to paint or draw. The moon was small, but so incredibly full of meaning for Clarke as she remembered her dad's words as he'd given her the necklace.

_The moon represents light in a time of darkness._

Lexa was her light. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well. There you go. I hope that was worth the wait. I really wanted to end this story with the tattoos, particularly Lexa's. ever since I had her say those words, I knew that would be her first tattoo. (Also, Raven now has one that says "I don't choose pain; I choose life"). 
> 
> Remember: this is not the end. I will be adding one- and two-shots to this as a series I'll call the FBED!verse. (Lol f bed.) I've already written one and have several more ideas in my head. Be on the lookout for those. :) 
> 
>  
> 
> Fun fact of the day: I don't know why I began doing these fun facts but I am ever so appreciative that I did. I've gotten to share a part of myself as well as learn about y'all and that makes my heart happy. I love you all and will definitely continue the fun facts of the day :)


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